So I'm getting guilt trips from both parents. Long history short, my parents divorced when I was 13, and I've lived half-way across the country with my mom with visitations to my dad during the summer and half of holidays.
When I started planning my wedding, I was slightly pressured into having just my mom walk me down the aisle. It was a good choice at the time because I didn't want to offend either my bio-dad or step-dad by having one or the other. As soon as I told my dad I was going to have my mom walk me, I could hear the disappointment in his voice, and felt so guilty. I fully admit that he hasn't treated me the best, but I'm still a daddy's girl. The guilt was eating away at me for the longest, so I talked with my step-dad to make sure he'd be okay with my incorporating my bio-dad (my fiancée ended up asking him to be his Best Man after that discussion, which made me ecstatic!). So I had changed my decision to having both my mother and bio-dad walk me down the aisle. When I went to tell my dad, he told me that my initial decision had upset him so much and told me that he was so traditional about it that he had considered not coming to my wedding or at least not staying for the reception because he was so upset about not walking me down the aisle. He still holds a grudge against my mother for taking me away. Let's just say that he and I both felt relieved after that conversation.
But now I'm getting guilt trips from my mom and aunt (step-dad's sis and mom's bf) about having them both walk me. They are holding on to the fact that my bio-dad hasn't played a big part of my life for the last 15 years, and how it detracts from my mom being a part of that. They feel like its going to look like my mom "can't let go."
I know ultimately it is my decision, and I felt so relieved and content between the second conversation with my bio-dad and the guilt trips from my mom and aunt. And I would absolutely love to have both of them walk me down the aisle.
Any advice out there on how to handle the guilt trips?