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Wedding Customs & Traditions Forum
tigerlily6
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Home v. Hotel?
We are getting married in the town where we live. We are already renting a house that we will be in for next year also. The reception venue is connected to a hotel where some of our guests are staying, but FI and I have both been going back and forth about whether we'd would rather stay there, or go back to our own place (only 10 min away). A part of me thinks it would be kind of cool to get to spend our first night as husband and wife in our home. It would feel very personal, and also help save a bit of money that we could put towards our limited honeymoon fund instead. FI and I are planning on being apart a few days before the wedding anyway (our BM is coming into town early, and FI is going to get a room at a local hotel and stay with him), so I have some time to get the house clean and welcoming, set up the bedroom with fresh bedsheets and some candles. But I also know it might feel special to have a night away, too -- plus it will just be so much easier to get to from the reception!
Thoughts? Experiences?
Thoughts? Experiences?
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Re: Home v. Hotel?
I recommend thinking about what is the most practical plan for you two on that day. Your first night as husband and wife will be meaningful no matter where you spend it.
I agree with Charlotte. .. your first night will be special no matter where you are.
However, @charlotte989875, I really liked your point about having a place for the bridal party to keep their belongings. I'm going to add that to our "pro" list for the hotel.
I am a home-body, but at the same time, I do like to go "away" some times. I feel like when we're at home, we get sucked into doing our own things, or feel like we have to do chores or whatever. But when you go away, you can't do all that stuff- feels more like a vacation.
That's a personal thing though- so up to you!
Our hotel also included a decent breakfast, so that was nice- cooking done! And were able to spend the morning pretty leisurely.
re drinking: It's not really a money saver...but if you're worried about that, do you have the budget available for a limo rental of some sort that can pick you up at your venue and take you home? Getting driven around town after the wedding was kind of nice and let us come down a bit from all the reception energy before we arrived at the hotel and settled in. And we didn't have to worry about drinking and driving.
We went home after the reception. We did not marry at a hotel (if we did - we probably would have had a room) and most hotels were farther away than our actual house. We had already arranged for a ride home from the reception with a DD.
My BMs and I were already getting ready at our house and having pictures taken there, so I had to clean up the house and have it ready regardless.
Our venue had a bridal party room for us, so my BMs were able to keep their stuff in the limo during our ceremony (at a church) and then in the bridal room once we got to the reception.
If not getting a hotel room can help extend your honeymoon by even a day, I would do that. As much as I enjoyed spending the quiet time with H after our wedding and the next day at home, it was even more amazing when we had our 2 night mini-moon at a B&B in a nearby state. We married on a Friday and went to the B&B on Sunday and came back on Tuesday. Check out Livingsocial or Groupon to see what hotel stays they have available in a drivable location. You might be able to get a really good deal!
@emmaaa, good thought on the pets. We have a dog and I was thinking about that too... hyper dog who likes to jump up on me + wedding dress might not go well. However, I think I may have him boarded beforehand anyway, since I don't know who would be able to dog-sit him during our wedding day (our neighbors are a tad passive aggressive towards us in general, so they're out of the question, and all our other friends in town are invited to the wedding).
@DarthV8r and @labro I love the idea of being chaperoned back home. We don't have a limo service in town, and renting one from the nearest city (a bit over an hour away) is pretty crazy expensive. But we do have uber and a local taxi. FI and I don't really plan on drinking very much -- in fact, I have made FI promise not to do so, because, well, wedding night. However, I know it's easy to SAY you'll just have one more drink, and another thing to do so; also, we may be pretty tired. So better be safe than sorry. I am going to look into transportation options.
One thing this conversation has also made me realize is that I should see what kind of breakfast options the hotel offers. They don't have a continental breakfast or a restaurant attached, so my guess is that it would probably just be room service. We are planning on having a "brunch" later that morning for guests who may still be in town, so I don't think we'd do a big breakfast, but we will probably want something.
ETA: @OliveOilsMom, thank you for the advice! We haven't settled on a destination for our honeymoon yet, just the timing and budget. But if we had even an extra $150, I think that could be used well towards slightly higher quality lodging for the honeymoon or a fancy dinner. I will check out those sites!
We also wanted to make sure it felt a bit special - we'd never have a reason to stay at a hotel in our city normally, so why not? No one else coming to our wedding is staying at our hotel, so it will feel even more like a little romantic retreat, I think.
If we had come home I know how we are and it wouldn't have been relaxing, it would have been cleaning and putting things away, in a hotel you really feel like you are on vacation.
The 2 nights only allows us to save for our actual honeymoon which will be in summer.
We honestly can't fathom going home right after, our dog would not leave us alone for a minute and like usual would be bouncing off the walls/furniture. {Yes...the dog is keeping us away, lol....}