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Help! Too Many Bridesmaids

Knottie1453771707Knottie1453771707 member
First Comment
in Wedding Party
Before I even got engaged I had no less than 7 friends personally ask if they could be a bridesmaid. Now I can only imagine taking on 4 bridesmaids for my 75 person wedding. How do I ask the remaining 3 girls to be involved in different ways in the wedding without them feeling disappointed?
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Re: Help! Too Many Bridesmaids

  • justsiejustsie member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    Knottie1453771707 said:
    Before I even got engaged I had no less than 7 friends personally ask if they could be a bridesmaid. Now I can only imagine taking on 4 bridesmaids for my 75 person wedding. How do I ask the remaining 3 girls to be involved in different ways in the wedding without them feeling disappointed?
    Ask the 4 you want to be bridesmaids to be bridesmaids, it was rude of your friends to ask you to be a part of the wedding. If you want the other 3 to have a part in the wedding doing a reading is the only other option. 
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  • levioosalevioosa member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    If you want them in your WP, ask them.  If you don't, the only other acceptable roles are "reader" during the ceremony, or guest.  


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  • floridabride44floridabride44 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment First Answer
    What everyone else said.

    Also, wait until about 9 months before your wedding to ask the four girls that you do want as BMs. No sooner. Friendships change and you don't want to be stuck with BMs who you've drifted apart from.
    --

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  • CMGragainCMGragain member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    It is very presumptuous to ask to be in someone's wedding party.  It puts you in an awkward position, which is why it is rude.
    Ignore your friends good, but misplaced intentions, and choose your bridesmaids about 9 months out.
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  • AddieCakeAddieCake member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    Ditto everyone above. You are not obligated to find ways to include all those ladies who assumed they would be in your wedding party.
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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  • Jen4948Jen4948 member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    Like everyone else says, you don't have to accommodate every request from someone to be in your wedding party.  But you can invite everyone to a bachelorette party or shower, assuming you are inviting them all to the wedding, and they can all get ready with you.
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  • SP29SP29 member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    Another option, is that one or two of them could sign your marriage license as your witnesses. 

    You are not obligated to include all of them- it was rude of them to ask you to be a BM. 
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  • kmmssgkmmssg mod
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    When they mentioned this did you say "of course you will be a bridesmaid!?
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  • Knottie1453771707Knottie1453771707 member
    First Comment
    There was never confirmation when they would ask. It was mostly met with just nervous laughter.

    Thanks everyone for your responses! I can see now what they did was rude and put me in an uncomfortable position. I shouldn't have to bend to their whims when it is my wedding.
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