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Snarky Brides

Gofundme for Honeymoon/home buying

MWVDMWVD member
Seventh Anniversary 10 Comments 5 Love Its
edited December 2015 in Snarky Brides
Well this is a new one... 
Ok can't post links got it. 
So someone I know posted a link on facebook for everyone to see about a gofundme they started to pay for their honeymoon/homebuying. They haven't gotten married yet and even have a date you have to contribute by! Obviously I am not. I just was shocked when I saw it. 
«1

Re: Gofundme for Honeymoon/home buying

  • This is a TOS violation - please take it down. 
  • I was posting it because I thought it was ridiculous. Didn't realize it was a TOS. 
  • I'm going to agree with the sentiment. But you can't post someone's public info here when the point is embarrassing the couple. There have been instances where not so nice Knotties accessed these sorts of sites and trashed the couple.

    Talking about the site in an ambiguous way (of know of a couple who did this thing...) is fine.

    Unless you named your son Saint, your info doesn't need to be all over here.
  • I updated it. I don't know them really. Just stumbled across it. But hope that works. 
  • LD1970LD1970 member
    Eighth Anniversary 1000 Comments 500 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2015
    Well, the date you have to contribute by is actually a function of how gofundme works. If they don't get the full amount requested by that date, they get zero.

    But it's otherwise gross. We rent our house, which we'd love to buy. Anyone wanna fork over $850,000?
    You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough. ~Mae West
  • Go Fund me is a little out of control now. I know someone in NYC who started a go fund me to help them fix their car. Really... why should your friends pay for your car? You live in New York! You don't even need a car!
  • JamieLynn913JamieLynn913 Watertown, CT member
    Fifth Anniversary 10 Comments Name Dropper 5 Love Its
    I agree that Go Fund Me has gotten a little out of control. Everything now has a page. If it's something legit I'm all for it but for something like this, it's super tacky. I would love a Range Rover. Anybody want to make a page with me so I can get that? I mean come on. 

    SP29
  • Completely agree. A friend of one of my coworkers recently had a GoFundMe set up to pay for the photography for their upcoming wedding. I mean, come on, people. Hire a photographer you can afford for crying out loud.
    Heffalump
  • I know of a couple who went waaaayy out of budget for their wedding and did a gofundme for $25,000 to have a lavish themed wedding. Side note- another couple I know is having guests send them money in advance to pay for their own plate. 


  • MobKazMobKaz Chicago suburbs member
    Ninth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    LD1970 said:
    Well, the date you have to contribute by is actually a function of how gofundme works. If they don't get the full amount requested by that date, they get zero. But it's otherwise gross. We rent our house, which we'd love to buy. Anyone wanna fork over $850,000?
    I did not know that.  Is that how it works for each one, regardless of "cause" or how the fund is established?  Who is responsible for returning the money?  In some of the cases, this actually makes me sad.
  • MobKaz said:
    LD1970 said:
    Well, the date you have to contribute by is actually a function of how gofundme works. If they don't get the full amount requested by that date, they get zero. But it's otherwise gross. We rent our house, which we'd love to buy. Anyone wanna fork over $850,000?
    I did not know that.  Is that how it works for each one, regardless of "cause" or how the fund is established?  Who is responsible for returning the money?  In some of the cases, this actually makes me sad.
    Nope.

    There USED to be an option where you could set your campaign up one of two ways.  The first way was just an open ended "give me money and I keep it all" campaign.  The second way was to establish a goal amount and it was all or nothing - essentially they were pledges to give money and if you didn't meet the goal then no one had to pay their pledged amount.

    I would say it worked that way as of at least 9 months or so ago (which was about the last time I looked it up after someone posted in chitchat about how it appeared as if someone withdrew their pledge from their nephew's leukemia gofundme campaign).  However, if you look on gofundme's site now, it appears now that the only option is the open-ended "give me money and I keep it all" campaign is your only option.

    Are there any time limits?

    Nope. With GoFundMe there are no deadlines or time-limits. Your campaign will remain live until you choose to stop donations or remove the campaign altogether. Most users leave their campaigns live indefinitely as a lasting memory of all the wonderful comments and support they received.

    What if I don't reach my goal?

    No problem. With GoFundMe, you keep each and every donation you receive. Reaching your goal is not required.                        

  • What do you guys think about go fund me pages for paying student loans? I have a cousin doing that who isn't really struggling at all. We're in NYC where there are great public colleges (I went to a CUNY school and most Architecture firms prefer CUNY graduates, we're good!). But he decided to go out of state which is of course more expensive, but it was his dream so no judgement. But now he set up a page because he can't pay his loans and have an internship in his field at the same time. Which of course sucks (Fingers crossed for Bernie to win) but it seems wrong to me, to ask people to pay for your schooling when much of that side of the family couldn't have a college education in the first place. There are some great repayment options until he gets on his feet ?_?.
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  • MCmeow said:
    What do you guys think about go fund me pages for paying student loans? I have a cousin doing that who isn't really struggling at all. We're in NYC where there are great public colleges (I went to a CUNY school and most Architecture firms prefer CUNY graduates, we're good!). But he decided to go out of state which is of course more expensive, but it was his dream so no judgement. But now he set up a page because he can't pay his loans and have an internship in his field at the same time. Which of course sucks (Fingers crossed for Bernie to win) but it seems wrong to me, to ask people to pay for your schooling when much of that side of the family couldn't have a college education in the first place. There are some great repayment options until he gets on his feet ?_?.
    GoFundMe is definitely wrong. His college was his choice, and he needs to own that. 

    If any of my friends suggested this, I'd send them into on the different repayment options available since Obama reformed it (#thanksObama). Now, people can pay 10% of their discretionary income, with that number increasing with their salary, and are sometimes eligible to get loans forgiven. (My FI & I both have MA degrees - and the loans to go with them - and we both work in nonprofits, so I've done a LOT of research on this lately.)

    For your cousin:
    https://studentaid.ed.gov/sa/repay-loans/understand/plans

  • adk19 said:
    MCmeow said:
    What do you guys think about go fund me pages for paying student loans? I have a cousin doing that who isn't really struggling at all. We're in NYC where there are great public colleges (I went to a CUNY school and most Architecture firms prefer CUNY graduates, we're good!). But he decided to go out of state which is of course more expensive, but it was his dream so no judgement. But now he set up a page because he can't pay his loans and have an internship in his field at the same time. Which of course sucks (Fingers crossed for Bernie to win) but it seems wrong to me, to ask people to pay for your schooling when much of that side of the family couldn't have a college education in the first place. There are some great repayment options until he gets on his feet ?_?.
    No.  I had to pay my school loans.  He needs to pay his.  He can get deferrals, get different loans, refinance, get a job in addition to his internship.  Just no.  I mean, go ahead and ask mom, dad, grandma, and your rich Aunt Mabel for a personal loan or a large gift, but don't ask friends and random strangers who are likely in the same situation you are in.  No.
    I'm sorry.  I can't stop.  This pisses me off.  Sell your belongings if you can't pay your bills.  Move back home.  Get a roommate or four.  Get a third job.  But don't panhandle, which is what a gofundme is.  Even people who need money to pay their medical bills don't usually set up the gofundme for themselves.  Usually it's someone else in the community who sees the need and wants to help.  "The Smith Family lost all their belongings in a freak house fire.  We, in their community, are collecting clothes and housewares, but they could use some help with rent for a new place and a security deposit.  We're hoping to raise $5000 for them by this date to gift to them as they move into their new apartment."
    thisismynickname2KnickerGold
  • I don't really talk to this cousin much, just saw it a few times on facebook and it just felt wrong
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  • MCmeow said:
    What do you guys think about go fund me pages for paying student loans? I have a cousin doing that who isn't really struggling at all. We're in NYC where there are great public colleges (I went to a CUNY school and most Architecture firms prefer CUNY graduates, we're good!). But he decided to go out of state which is of course more expensive, but it was his dream so no judgement. But now he set up a page because he can't pay his loans and have an internship in his field at the same time. Which of course sucks (Fingers crossed for Bernie to win) but it seems wrong to me, to ask people to pay for your schooling when much of that side of the family couldn't have a college education in the first place. There are some great repayment options until he gets on his feet ?_?.
    GoFundMe is definitely wrong. His college was his choice, and he needs to own that. 

    If any of my friends suggested this, I'd send them into on the different repayment options available since Obama reformed it (#thanksObama). Now, people can pay 10% of their discretionary income, with that number increasing with their salary, and are sometimes eligible to get loans forgiven. (My FI & I both have MA degrees - and the loans to go with them - and we both work in nonprofits, so I've done a LOT of research on this lately.)

    For your cousin:
    https://studentaid.ed.gov/sa/repay-loans/understand/plans
    This.   Your cousin made a choice to go somewhere that costs more money.   Why on Earth is paying his bill the responsibility of anyone?

    I don't buy the student loan forgiveness thing - particularly when the request is from an expensive private institution.   DH and I both went to our state university vs many of our peers that went to more expensive schools.   We don't have the same debt that our friends do.   Why is student loan forgiveness a thing but not auto loan forgiveness?   Spend what you can afford and pick a major that will earn money.   I have minimal sympathy that your Art History degree from Expensive U isn't the lucrative option you thought it was.   While I'm at it should I help you pay for your old Saab? 




    [Deleted User]floridabride44thisismynickname2MrsMack10612
  • MCmeow said:
    I don't really talk to this cousin much, just saw it a few times on facebook and it just felt wrong
    It feels wrong because it is.  His expensive education is not an unfortunate malady that befell him.  He made a conscious decision to pursue a want. Adults are responsible for the outcomes of their decisions.  
    SP29KnickerGold
  • I can go on a tirade about how our state university's tuition has more than doubled in the last 15 years when the cost of nothing else has.   It *is* absurd and that's its own separate issue.

    The entire college application and attendance game is worth a shake up.   And we need to stop touting college as the end all and be all.     If we don't have people educated in trades then we'll have a lot of people who know Chaucer but who can't fix leaky pipes, problematic boilers or shoddy electrical work. 
    [Deleted User]ILoveBeachMusicthisismynickname2kimmiinthemitten
  • adk19 said:

    adk19 said:
    MCmeow said:
    What do you guys think about go fund me pages for paying student loans? I have a cousin doing that who isn't really struggling at all. We're in NYC where there are great public colleges (I went to a CUNY school and most Architecture firms prefer CUNY graduates, we're good!). But he decided to go out of state which is of course more expensive, but it was his dream so no judgement. But now he set up a page because he can't pay his loans and have an internship in his field at the same time. Which of course sucks (Fingers crossed for Bernie to win) but it seems wrong to me, to ask people to pay for your schooling when much of that side of the family couldn't have a college education in the first place. There are some great repayment options until he gets on his feet ?_?.
    No.  I had to pay my school loans.  He needs to pay his.  He can get deferrals, get different loans, refinance, get a job in addition to his internship.  Just no.  I mean, go ahead and ask mom, dad, grandma, and your rich Aunt Mabel for a personal loan or a large gift, but don't ask friends and random strangers who are likely in the same situation you are in.  No.
    I'm sorry.  I can't stop.  This pisses me off.  Sell your belongings if you can't pay your bills.  Move back home.  Get a roommate or four.  Get a third job.  But don't panhandle, which is what a gofundme is.  Even people who need money to pay their medical bills don't usually set up the gofundme for themselves.  Usually it's someone else in the community who sees the need and wants to help.  "The Smith Family lost all their belongings in a freak house fire.  We, in their community, are collecting clothes and housewares, but they could use some help with rent for a new place and a security deposit.  We're hoping to raise $5000 for them by this date to gift to them as they move into their new apartment."
    Yea I agree with adk . I went to an expensive private school because it had a major I couldn't get anywhere else. While in school I worked part time jobs and found internships that paid so that I could put that right back into school. I lived at home for college to save more money it sucked that I didn't get the on campus experience but it lowered my already ridiculous debt amount. I worked my ass off in school to get a good paying job and have lived very minimally for the past 2.5 years to pay off over 70K of debt. Granted it helped that DH went to a state school and had no debt so he helped pay off a good chunk of it but I was set to pay it off in 4 years if he hadn't helped. 

    It makes me sick when people think they deserve to have their loans forgiven because they went to their dream expensive school for their dream program that has no jobs or jobs that don't make enough money to pay back their loans. Pick a major that has decent job prospects and a school you can afford. No one should pay for your choices but you!
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  • banana468 said:
    I can go on a tirade about how our state university's tuition has more than doubled in the last 15 years when the cost of nothing else has.   It *is* absurd and that's its own separate issue.

    The entire college application and attendance game is worth a shake up.   And we need to stop touting college as the end all and be all.     If we don't have people educated in trades then we'll have a lot of people who know Chaucer but who can't fix leaky pipes, problematic boilers or shoddy electrical work. 
    YES HONEY

    I teach at a not so great high school. It seriously pains me hearing from ex students how much money they are spending on classes before they are even able to English 101/ Math 101, then their degree, then most likely take an unpaid internship.

    The other part is those facebook memes about "I never learned about student loans or how to do my taxes but I know the mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell/ SOCAHTOA" 

    At least at my school we DO offer personal finance classes AND votech classes: culinary, cosmetology, auto shop, welding, electrical, nursing, dental hygienist, and plumbing.But since they're not honors or AP guidance counselors won't recommend them to kids. Its so frustrating. Take a personal finance class and the trade schools we offe

    Although on the other end of the spectrum I do think if you work at a title 1 (poorest of the poor)schools at a regular teachers salary (peanuts) for 5 years you DO serve to get a certain amount of your loans forgiven- you're doing a service many people cannot or will not do.



    charlotte989875SP29
  • I think I've "liked" the last 10 or so posts about student loans. MCmeow said:
    What do you guys think about go fund me pages for paying student loans? I have a cousin doing that who isn't really struggling at all. We're in NYC where there are great public colleges (I went to a CUNY school and most Architecture firms prefer CUNY graduates, we're good!). But he decided to go out of state which is of course more expensive, but it was his dream so no judgement. But now he set up a page because he can't pay his loans and have an internship in his field at the same time. Which of course sucks (Fingers crossed for Bernie to win) but it seems wrong to me, to ask people to pay for your schooling when much of that side of the family couldn't have a college education in the first place. There are some great repayment options until he gets on his feet ?_?.
    What really gets me... On top of the loan forgiveness and income based repayment plans already out there, you are suggesting that asking people to pay for schooling is wrong but it's totes ok if the government pays for it. I could ask Mom and Dad to pay my tuition bills with money they earned, or I could ask the collective federal taxpaying population to contribute towards my needlessly expensive-ass education. 
    NO.
    Money doesn't grow on trees people, the government does not generate money. It takes money from other people and redistributes it. 
    Yup, I do believe the government should pay for public schooling, not private institutions which the media loves to incorrectly state. Bernie has said a million times he wants to make public college free. I've always believed the US should look to European countries and copy some policies. The US is way behind on how citizens are treated and it makes me sad that Americans rather pay for war through taxes than a poor kid's college education. Invest in poor kids and there will be less Americans on welfare.
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    MyNameIsNotSP29kimmiinthemitten
  • thisismynickname2thisismynickname2 City By The Lake member
    5000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    MCmeow said:
    I think I've "liked" the last 10 or so posts about student loans. MCmeow said:
    What do you guys think about go fund me pages for paying student loans? I have a cousin doing that who isn't really struggling at all. We're in NYC where there are great public colleges (I went to a CUNY school and most Architecture firms prefer CUNY graduates, we're good!). But he decided to go out of state which is of course more expensive, but it was his dream so no judgement. But now he set up a page because he can't pay his loans and have an internship in his field at the same time. Which of course sucks (Fingers crossed for Bernie to win) but it seems wrong to me, to ask people to pay for your schooling when much of that side of the family couldn't have a college education in the first place. There are some great repayment options until he gets on his feet ?_?.
    What really gets me... On top of the loan forgiveness and income based repayment plans already out there, you are suggesting that asking people to pay for schooling is wrong but it's totes ok if the government pays for it. I could ask Mom and Dad to pay my tuition bills with money they earned, or I could ask the collective federal taxpaying population to contribute towards my needlessly expensive-ass education. 
    NO.
    Money doesn't grow on trees people, the government does not generate money. It takes money from other people and redistributes it. 
    Yup, I do believe the government should pay for public schooling, not private institutions which the media loves to incorrectly state. Bernie has said a million times he wants to make public college free. I've always believed the US should look to European countries and copy some policies. The US is way behind on how citizens are treated and it makes me sad that Americans rather pay for war through taxes than a poor kid's college education. Invest in poor kids and there will be less Americans on welfare.
    I don't disagree with the theory about making public college free, but part of the reason private institutions exist is because public doesn't get the job done. It's not just, "Here kid have $10k and go to your local CC," or increasing funding to each CC to accommodate the slew of seats needed. I would love to see the math on encouraging people to attend CC and the investment dollars, not to mention the sheer control to ensure ROI (as it would be far above and beyond the regulations public entities already face, requiring more legal experts to manage all of it)... all that versus the current system of allowing each person to choose the best institution for themselves and take out a loan or receive grants to do it. 
    Choice. 

    And oh yeah, I'd love to see if any of our Great Britain friends here can chime in, because last I knew "free" college failed in England and people are paying tuition.
    At some point you run out of other people's money.
    ________________________________


    db1984
  • MCmeow said:
    I think I've "liked" the last 10 or so posts about student loans. MCmeow said:
    What do you guys think about go fund me pages for paying student loans? I have a cousin doing that who isn't really struggling at all. We're in NYC where there are great public colleges (I went to a CUNY school and most Architecture firms prefer CUNY graduates, we're good!). But he decided to go out of state which is of course more expensive, but it was his dream so no judgement. But now he set up a page because he can't pay his loans and have an internship in his field at the same time. Which of course sucks (Fingers crossed for Bernie to win) but it seems wrong to me, to ask people to pay for your schooling when much of that side of the family couldn't have a college education in the first place. There are some great repayment options until he gets on his feet ?_?.
    What really gets me... On top of the loan forgiveness and income based repayment plans already out there, you are suggesting that asking people to pay for schooling is wrong but it's totes ok if the government pays for it. I could ask Mom and Dad to pay my tuition bills with money they earned, or I could ask the collective federal taxpaying population to contribute towards my needlessly expensive-ass education. 
    NO.
    Money doesn't grow on trees people, the government does not generate money. It takes money from other people and redistributes it. 
    Yup, I do believe the government should pay for public schooling, not private institutions which the media loves to incorrectly state. Bernie has said a million times he wants to make public college free. I've always believed the US should look to European countries and copy some policies. The US is way behind on how citizens are treated and it makes me sad that Americans rather pay for war through taxes than a poor kid's college education. Invest in poor kids and there will be less Americans on welfare.
    I don't disagree with the theory about making public college free, but part of the reason private institutions exist is because public doesn't get the job done. It's not just, "Here kid have $10k and go to your local CC," or increasing funding to each CC to accommodate the slew of seats needed. I would love to see the math on encouraging people to attend CC and the investment dollars, not to mention the sheer control to ensure ROI (as it would be far above and beyond the regulations public entities already face, requiring more legal experts to manage all of it)... all that versus the current system of allowing each person to choose the best institution for themselves and take out a loan or receive grants to do it. 
    Choice. 

    And oh yeah, I'd love to see if any of our Great Britain friends here can chime in, because last I knew "free" college failed in England and people are paying tuition.
    At some point you run out of other people's money.
    It isn't a simple answer.

    University tuition in scotland is still free, it is heavily subsidised by the scottish government.
    You do pay a graduation tax of about £2k at the end which you can either add to your student loans or pay in full. England has had fees for a long time (all my English uni friends paid fees at my Scottish university back in 2001), but in the last few years has increased them significantly. I don't know how the US system works, here you can take out loans for your tuition so it's not that it has to be paid up front in every case*.

    I'm interested to know if your definition of failed is because the goverment decided university fees was a prime area on which to focus their budget cuts, or that free or subsidised education in and of itself didn't work?

    The young in this country are virtually ignored by the government as they don't have the kind of voting power that the older voter has. I'm sure it is similar in the US. My view is that education is a right for all. We increasing live in a world where a degree in literally anything is a bare minimum requirement for a foot in the door. I don't think our younger generation deserve to be crippled with debt just to compete on a playing field for which they did not make the rules. For me it all reeks of a generation that got the benefit of all the best britain had to offer pulling up the ladder behind them. Yes, the money has to come from somewhere, but I think education should be one of the priorities. Our government could choose to cut other things, but university students don't give them the voter turn out they need. 

    *as always, there are exceptions. I'm the first to admit I'm no expert.
                 
    MCmeowscrunchythiefMyNameIsNotkimmiinthemitten
  • @charlotte989875 are university fees in the US $65000 per year?? Wow. Okay, fees in England are capped at £9000 per year (this is the increased figure). It seems paltry in comparison, however it isn't a race to the bottom and I believe it should be more affordable still. I guess the difference in those costs would be that in the UK the fees are capped by the government, whereas in the US I suspect uni's are a company that is able to charge what they like?
                 
    kimmiinthemitten
  • Some are, that's definitely the high end. The average 4 year, non profit+ room and board is $43,922 ($34,405 without room & board). Four year public room & board is $19,548 ($9,410 with out room & board). 

    For private universities there is no cap. 
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