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Etiquette

Thank You Cards

edited June 2016 in Etiquette
I've recently been seeing and receiving printed thank you cards. No handwritten cards specifying the gift I gave, but cutesy cards with generic messaging thanking me for attending the event and for my "generous gift". Is this a new thing? Whatever happened to handwritten messages inside a card? Maybe I'm too sensitive. Here's an example of what I'm taking about:

https://www.etsy.com/listing/237861771/printable-bridal-shower-thank-you-card?ga_order=most_relevant&ga_search_type=all&ga_view_type=gallery&ga_search_query=printed%20thank%20you%20cards%20bridal%20shower&ref=sc_gallery_3&plkey=3c76eb701bd858c077e0af1c4ccff3fcb72b7072:237861771 



*Edited for grammar. 
«1

Re: Thank You Cards

  • Eeeeewwwww!
    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
    ei34SP29
  • DrillSergeantCatDrillSergeantCat Oklahoma City, OK member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary First Answer
    Soooo rude! 
    ei34
  • OurWildKingdomOurWildKingdom in the 216 member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 5 Answers
    Better than receiving no thank-you at all, but still rude.
    ei34SP29
  • LD1970LD1970 member
    Eighth Anniversary 1000 Comments 500 Love Its Name Dropper
    H & I recently got a preprinted photo thank you card with no handwritten note or even signature from a communion we attended.  It just so happens that we spent quite a bit of time and effort choosing a gift for that kid, and were pretty damned annoyed that he wasn't even made to write a thank you or comment on the gift at all.
    You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough. ~Mae West
    ei34
  • OurWildKingdomOurWildKingdom in the 216 member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 5 Answers
    LtPowers said:
    Better than receiving no thank-you at all, but still rude.
    Sure, like a cash bar is better than no refreshments at all.  =)


    Touché.  ;)
  • Ewww.

    How lazy can you get?  Just buy thank you cards, write like 3-4 sentences, sign it, and if you want to save time, print out address labels or something.  

    SaveSave
    ei34
  • ei34ei34 member
    Seventh Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    edited June 2016
    This drives me crazy.  I've received a couple of these too (for weddings and kids' birthday gifts).  How in god's name is it so hard for some people to write "Thank you so much for your gift, and thank you for coming".  I'm all for a 3-4 sentence, specifically naming the gift thank you, but at the very least write something in your own handwriting.  The recipient doesn't even sign their name. :#


    ETA:  and I just clicked on the actual link...what weird text.  It's a bridal shower thank you card, and the bride aka the Etsy seller thanks you for spending this "momentous" day with her.  Was anyone's bridal shower a momentous day in your life?  Mine wasn't.  Is that bad??
    thisismynickname2OurWildKingdom
  • edited June 2016
    Right. If I buy a bunch of little items your registry, I don't expect to be thanked for every single item, but a few sentences and simple "thank you for the kitchen supplies" would suffice.  
    ei34OurWildKingdom
  • ILoveBeachMusicILoveBeachMusic Indiana member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 5 Answers
    This is one of pet peeves. If I spent the time to pick out a gift for you, you can sure take the time to write a few personal comments on a card.
    holyguacamole79
  • MobKazMobKaz Chicago suburbs member
    Ninth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Return to sender.
    sparklepants41ei34LadyCatherineDBTheDeathLlama
  • holyguacamole79holyguacamole79 a taco truck in Houston member
    5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
  • MobKaz said:
    Return to sender.
    Seriously. That generic cutesy lazy pretend "thank you" note is such crap. I would be so offended if I received one of those.
  • thisismynickname2thisismynickname2 City By The Lake member
    5000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    I'm giggling that the description of that TY card is "unique." It's not unique. It's so far from unique I can't even describe it. It's offensively not unique. 

    But, thank God, I've never received one like this before. Even the ones with a picture of the couple from their wedding, the ones that arrive 5 months after the fact, have a personal, handwritten note enclosed. 
    ________________________________


    OurWildKingdombleve0821SP29
  • This is worse than no thank you at all in my book. Without a thank you, the couple seems just rude and ignorant....here, they know what the right thing to do is, and have clearly tried to do the bare minimum and failed even there. It's like insulting your guests intelligence on top of being rude. 


    SITB :(

    I agree, it's just dripping in laziness and entitlement. They're basically saying "here's this think I *have* to do ugh you better appreciate this", I'd rather get no thank you than a preprinted one. Even if you have a 500 person wedding you can bang out your thank you cards in a month whole binge watching a show on Netflix. That's not a thank you, that's a fuck you. 
    OurWildKingdomJediElizabeth
  • Jen4948Jen4948 Houston member
    10000 Comments Seventh Anniversary 500 Love Its 25 Answers
  • I mentioned this in the side-eyeing threat in Chit Chat already, but: I got one of these recently, two months after my cousin's sons bar miztvah. I didn't attend, nor did I send a gift, but that didn't prevent them from sending me a piece of heavy weight paper folded in half with a picture of him on the front and a typed note inside thanking me for attending and telling me he truly appreciates my generous gift. 

    People who use these are so lazy. 
  • I'd honestly rather receive that than nothing at all. I went to a shower, wedding and eventually sent a gift to her baby shower (I wasn't able to attend) and gave gifts at all of them (yes, I know, fool me once, blah blah blah....) and never received a thank you for any of them! This was all the same girl.

    The shower I brushed off because she thanked me personally, so fine, I'm "okay" without a thank you card (not really....) but I never even heard one damned word about the wedding or baby shower gift. Drives me insane! One of these days I'm going to ask her if she even received the wedding or baby shower gifts. When she says yes, then I'll do the "oh, I was hoping you did but I never heard so I was worried". I would have been fine with a generic, I'm too lazy to do thank you cards but here's a thank you card, thing. At least it's something! It's not great, okay it sucks but at least it would be something. *End of rant* 

    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • Jen4948Jen4948 Houston member
    10000 Comments Seventh Anniversary 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    Ugh. Laaaaaaaazy.
  • I have received no thank you cards for the last four weddings I have attended. I don't expect them anymore. My friends are rude. 
  • MobKaz said:

    I'd honestly rather receive that than nothing at all. I went to a shower, wedding and eventually sent a gift to her baby shower (I wasn't able to attend) and gave gifts at all of them (yes, I know, fool me once, blah blah blah....) and never received a thank you for any of them! This was all the same girl.

    The shower I brushed off because she thanked me personally, so fine, I'm "okay" without a thank you card (not really....) but I never even heard one damned word about the wedding or baby shower gift. Drives me insane! One of these days I'm going to ask her if she even received the wedding or baby shower gifts. When she says yes, then I'll do the "oh, I was hoping you did but I never heard so I was worried". I would have been fine with a generic, I'm too lazy to do thank you cards but here's a thank you card, thing. At least it's something! It's not great, okay it sucks but at least it would be something. *End of rant* 

    I don't see it as "something" at all.  It is NOthing; no thought, no effort, no sincerity, no appreciation. 

    True but at least it forces them to sit down and do it. Plus, they have to pay for a stamp lol I seriously would have rather had that, than nothing at all. Perhaps that's just me though. Neither is right but yeah...
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
    SP29
  • I'm late to the party.  I haven't received Thank You cards from some of the recent weddings I attended, and some kids parties where I didn't receive any cards either....

    I'll side eye  the shit out of printed TY cards...but it's better than nothing.
  • When I was a kid my mom had me call each family member and verbally thank them for the gift. Would people side eye that rather than a card? (for a kid party, not a wedding)
  • ILoveBeachMusicILoveBeachMusic Indiana member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 5 Answers
    When I was a kid my mom had me call each family member and verbally thank them for the gift. Would people side eye that rather than a card? (for a kid party, not a wedding)
    I wouldn't side eye that for a kid's gift. When my kids were young, we called family members but they still wrote a note. I figured it was necessary to engrain in them the need for thank you notes.
    OurWildKingdomInLoveInQueenscharlotte989875
  • Jen4948Jen4948 Houston member
    10000 Comments Seventh Anniversary 500 Love Its 25 Answers

    I'd honestly rather receive that than nothing at all. I went to a shower, wedding and eventually sent a gift to her baby shower (I wasn't able to attend) and gave gifts at all of them (yes, I know, fool me once, blah blah blah....) and never received a thank you for any of them! This was all the same girl.

    The shower I brushed off because she thanked me personally, so fine, I'm "okay" without a thank you card (not really....) but I never even heard one damned word about the wedding or baby shower gift. Drives me insane! One of these days I'm going to ask her if she even received the wedding or baby shower gifts. When she says yes, then I'll do the "oh, I was hoping you did but I never heard so I was worried". I would have been fine with a generic, I'm too lazy to do thank you cards but here's a thank you card, thing. At least it's something! It's not great, okay it sucks but at least it would be something. *End of rant* 

    By accepting this rather than nothing at all, you're sending the message that it's okay for gift recipients to brush you off with a piece of trash instead of true thank-you notes. 

    It's not better to send a pre-printed card than nothing at all. Both are equally rude because they're dismissive of the time, money, and energy the giver took out of their lives to get the recipient a gift that they were not entitled to.
    InLoveInQueens
  • SP29SP29 member
    Sixth Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Jen4948 said:

    I'd honestly rather receive that than nothing at all. I went to a shower, wedding and eventually sent a gift to her baby shower (I wasn't able to attend) and gave gifts at all of them (yes, I know, fool me once, blah blah blah....) and never received a thank you for any of them! This was all the same girl.

    The shower I brushed off because she thanked me personally, so fine, I'm "okay" without a thank you card (not really....) but I never even heard one damned word about the wedding or baby shower gift. Drives me insane! One of these days I'm going to ask her if she even received the wedding or baby shower gifts. When she says yes, then I'll do the "oh, I was hoping you did but I never heard so I was worried". I would have been fine with a generic, I'm too lazy to do thank you cards but here's a thank you card, thing. At least it's something! It's not great, okay it sucks but at least it would be something. *End of rant* 

    By accepting this rather than nothing at all, you're sending the message that it's okay for gift recipients to brush you off with a piece of trash instead of true thank-you notes. 

    It's not better to send a pre-printed card than nothing at all. Both are equally rude because they're dismissive of the time, money, and energy the giver took out of their lives to get the recipient a gift that they were not entitled to.
    But what is the solution here? Send the pre-printed TY note back and tell the sender it's not acceptable?
    OurWildKingdomAddieCakePrettyGirlLostglasgowtolondon
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