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Re: Inappropriate?

  • DrillSergeantCatDrillSergeantCat Oklahoma City, OK member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary First Answer
    The other guests were inappropriate. Even if this girl came nude to the wedding no one should have laid a hand on her and they should have kept the comments to themselves. You're absolutely, 100% right. I'm not sure how I would have reacted if I were her. 

    Places where the shortness, color or tightness of a dress dictates its appropriateness (at least to me): school, church, and work. Any outfit is inappropriate if it is showing your goods (ie, nips if you're a woman, and ass/privates for either gender) to the general public. Otherwise everything is just a matter of taste. So in short, to me, if this was an outdoor (not in a church) wedding then I don't think appropriate/inappropriate comes into play so long as the dress didn't ride up, or slip down, to expose her goods. That is an excellent point. It was an outdoor wedding, it was 90 degrees, she was dressed for the heat. I personally find her dress to be distasteful because of the color being so close to her skin tone, but she was covered in the necessary areas.

    I was at a wedding once where the bride's boobs were really pushed up and on display in her dress and during the father-daughter dance the bride had a nip slip. I would deem the functionality of that wedding dress inappropriate in retrospect because it was extremely prone to wardrobe malfunction. This is what I am picturing:

  • SP29SP29 member
    Sixth Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    edited July 2016
    I don't think she looks naked. When you said the dress was nude and you had to do a double take, I was picturing something sheer or lacey where it's hard to tell her skin from the dress. I didn't find that with this.

    What rude guests- they should be ashamed.

    I don't think it the best way to dress for a wedding, but there's nothing *wrong* with it (yes, this is a matter of my taste). If I had a body like hers, a night out at the club- sure.
  • MCmeowMCmeow member
    500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 100 Comments Name Dropper
    edited July 2016
    I don't see the problem with this... Sure I wouldn't wear this in a million years but I'm not her. I doubt she bought this dress thinking "I want to outshine the bride", she just wanted to wear something she feels good in. Body types also have a lot to do with it, I have a petite almost boy like figure and this dress would look pretty modest on me, it's the same dress though so would people say the same thing? Let her flaunt the muscles she's proud of. And the guests who touched her are disgusting. And in my opinion, it's a little too racy for a wedding, but that is my own opinion which shouldn't dictate anyone else, as long as she's not exposing anything or literally trying to upstage the bride, there's no problem.
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  • Even if she didn't have a rocking body, she can wear this dress or any other clothing item unless there is a stated dress code for the venue (i.e. shoulders covered/jackets for men).

    Personally, I would never wear something like this but that's me.

    Any unwanted touching is assault and police should have been called.

  • levioosalevioosa Southern California member
    Eighth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    I personally wouldn't wear that dress to a wedding, but holy shit people, back the fuck off.  There is nothing wrong with the dress.  I definitely don't think she looks nude at all.  Her skin is clearly a different color than the dress.  And seriously fuck the people who thought it was okay to slap her ass.  That's completely inappropriate.  

  • This is just slut shaming and I am 100% not down for that shit. I personally love small bodycon dresses and they make me feel great about my body and if guys touch me inappropriately I do not stand for that at all, no one has any right to touch my body without my permission no exceptions. What other people wear literally does not affect other people in the slightest.

    For a wedding I would probably wear something more girly and floral just because I never get an opportunity to wear 'pretty, girly ' dresses and that's a perfect excuse to wear one.
  • kaos16kaos16 member
    Knottie Warrior 500 Love Its 1000 Comments First Answer
    I was just reading about this incident on a different news site and people claiming to be acquaintances of this woman are saying that the situation was exaggerated and it didn't happen at all how she portrays it.  Who knows.  I almost hope that she did exaggerate it because I don't want to think that people are really uncivilized enough to lay hands on another person at a wedding for what she is wearing! 
  • It's an ugly dress and totally inappropriate for a wedding, but the other guests should've kept their hands and beers to themselves. If they had an opinion on it, they should've saved it for gossip on the ride home. 

    Frankly I'm more annoyed by the attempt to attach some sort of inspirational crap to the whole incident than by the dress itself.

  • lyndausvi said:
    I'm laughing at the fact that these guests actually thought she wore this dress to upstage the bride.

    Really?     Do men wearing tuxes, wear them to upstage the groom?    

    I hate this double standard.  I also hate the people [sadly, mostly women] actually believe other women are trying to upstage them/others.   Sure there are those who seek out attention, we all know who they are.  However, the vast majority of people just do not dress to upstage others. 

    News flash, not every action has an ulterior motive attached.  She liked the dress, she wore it.  NBD.

    Now the dress.   NMS, looks more like a dress you wear to a club, but not inappropriate.   Might standout in certain social groups, but that is a far cry from being inappropriate and deserving being bullied over.

     The guests should be ashamed of themselves for shaming her. 
    This is totally unrelated to the post (dress = fine, people = awful) but you got me thinking... we had my niece and nephew (11 twins) over for the night a few weeks ago and took them to the pool.  A young boy was playing with my nephew and his mom came over to thank us for letting nephew play with him.  When she walked away my niece said "she was beautiful".  I suggested she tell her she looks beautiful but my niece was too shy.  Then she asked if I was intimidated by how pretty the boy's mom was.  

    I said no, and that I think we are all uncomfortable in our skin at times (this mom spent a lot of time looking at her reflection in the window, sucking in her stomach) and that she would have likely appreciated the compliment.  I also told her that I can still feel pretty and know someone else is pretty as well.

    It just made me really sad that at 11 years old she is already learning somewhere that we can't appreciate ourselves and respect others' beauty. :(

    Sorry for hijacking, it's just been really bothering me and this made me think of where that starts.
  • I don't like the dress and think it's more club appropriate than wedding attire.   She has a great body but I think she could have gone for something else IMO.    
  • Personally, I am fucking proud of her for fighting back and drawing attention to the way she was treated and I think the show of support is awesome. Rape culture and sexual harassment are systematic problem that has been dismissed and excused for too long. At this point I don't care if the dress was inappropriate or not, I want this conversation to happen and I want people to see that the behavior she experienced is unacceptable regardless of what she was wearing.

    While I am getting a strong whiff of this being a possibly exaggerated or even fake story and an "AW, not so subtle advert for my biz", I agree 1000% that these are the kind of conversations that need to be taking place.

    That kind of touching is a sexual assault and a crime...even when it is done by a person of the same gender.  I'm sure most of us can tell a story(s) about being slapped on the ass/groped by a stranger in a bar.  My younger self thought, "Well, it's annoying, but no big deal, I don't want to make a thing about it."  But it IS a big deal and we need to make a thing about it.  Otherwise, that behavior continues to happen.  And that ugly, "not so unspoken" attitude pervades.  That it's okay to assault/harass women if they are acting/dressed in a certain way.

    I know I didn't go far enough, but I'm proud of myself the last time it happened to me.  It was Halloween and I was dressed like a old movie type cigarette girl and was wearing a corset top.  I live in NOLA and kept having some guy following me asking me to show him "the girls" for beads.  I kept telling him "no" and "not interested".  Then he reached over to try and pull the top of my corset down!  I pushed that a** away as hard as I could and started screaming for a police officer.  In my younger days, I would have just "let it go" and moved on.  But not any more.

    A police officer came right over and I explained what happened.  That guy just kept repeating he was sorry, over and over again.  He was crying and scared s**tless he was going to be arrested.  Sadly, I doubt the police officer would have arrested him even if I had been more forceful about it.  So he was let off with a "warning".  But I like to think (and hope) it was the last time that loser thought it would be "fun and no big deal" to inappropriately touch someone without their permission.        

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