Pre-wedding Parties

Planning my own Bachelorette Party

Opinions please. My MOH is my sister and will not be attending my bachelorette party (she says due to time off and lack of funds, since she lives in another state). I kind of assumed this from the get-go. I never wanted to put the stress on anyone else, so I started planning it myself. I have the hotel booked with the deposit on my credit card, ordered the shirts, and have made all the plans so far... At what point and how do I ask for help? It kind of sucks having to plan my own to be honest. Every time I ask for opinions, the response is "whatever you want to do!". It's a few weeks away and there is not itinerary planned yet for the weekend, and I don't want to plan it... Do I ask my best friend for help? Do I ask all the girls for help? Thoughts??

Re: Planning my own Bachelorette Party

  • I agree with PPs. You shouldn't have done this. You don't plan parties for yourself. 
  • Yes, I am the first in the circle to get married. I asked in the beginning who would be interested in a bachelorette party, they all said yes, I asked where and how long and they said Miami for 2 nights... so it's not like I forced anything upon anyone. I just took the planning from there once my sister said she couldn't go.
  • Also, my best friend started the Facebook page and started a Pinterest board to begin getting ideas.

  • Then let your best friend plan it.


  • Let your best friend plan it. She should be talking to the other people who are invited about their budget and the time frame for the party. She should send out invites and coordinate the itinerary. She should be making the reservations within the budget of all the attendees. Again, stay out of the planning and let her handle it. 
  • I live in Texas (I'm from Florida) so I'm really the only one who is traveling in by the way. :)
  • Let your bff plan it.  If nothing gets offered or planned, well, many people have managed to survive without a girl's night out before they get married.  


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  • Honestly - 

    Most of the bachelorette parties in my friend group have been planned this way. Kind of a collaborative bride-included deal. We all know we want to do it and we're all excited about it. No one is secretly stewing over how tacky it is that the bride said she wanted to go clubbing. Just talk to your friend - it sounds like she's already taken ownership and is excited about it. 
  • Also, my best friend started the Facebook page and started a Pinterest board to begin getting ideas.

    Oh, a pinterest board changes everything! Send this bitch an invoice!
    Image result for someecard betting someone half your shit youll love them forever
  • geebee908geebee908 member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    edited July 2016
    Personally I don't think it's bad to ask for help. If they were goof friends they would already be helping you. I have had lots of people say they are going to be there and not show up or not come through. I know it isn't all about the money either just the comfort. They should be giving you that you shouldn't have to ask for it. I would confront them but that is the kind of person I am. Let them know this is upsetting you. Maybe they just do not understand. I found good bridesmaid cover ups at (deleted promotion) maybe a little gift to get them more into the wedding will help? Sorry you're having problems.
    Bad advice if she's interested in keeping her friends. If she doesn't care that her friendships go by the wayside after the wedding, then she could totally confront them about their lack of enthusiasm.

    Also did you find a way to work in a website promotion as part of this reply? Not cool.
  • Personally I don't think it's bad to ask for help. If they were goof friends they would already be helping you. I have had lots of people say they are going to be there and not show up or not come through. I know it isn't all about the money either just the comfort. They should be giving you that you shouldn't have to ask for it. I would confront them but that is the kind of person I am. Let them know this is upsetting you. Maybe they just do not understand. I found good bridesmaid cover ups at www.spazooie.com maybe a little gift to get them more into the wedding will help? Sorry you're having problems.
    I'm sure these Florida residents just need some hideous fake fur shawls to bribe them into planning the party of her dreams.
  • CMGragainCMGragain member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    edited July 2016
    You are planning your wedding.  Fine.  You get to choose many things about your wedding day, including guest list, venue, food, flowers, music, ceremony details, your dress, bridesmaids dresses (within their budget).

    You are not entitled to a bachelorette party.  You may not plan your own party.  If no one offers to throw you one, you don't get one.  Period.

    While we are on the subject of pre-wedding parties, you may not plan and host your own shower or engagement party either.  This is done by friends or relatives (if they volunteer), not you.

    Planning your own parties in honor of yourself make you look very gift grabby and attention seeking.  Surely that isn't what you wanted, is it?
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