Wedding Etiquette Forum

Outdoor wedding in July - Rude or not?

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Re: Outdoor wedding in July - Rude or not?

  • lyndausvi said:
      I've seen a ton of outdoor weddings.      We did over 100 a year in the islands.  I've seen weddings on boats.  I've seen them on beaches.  I've seen them on top of mountains in the summer time.   And on top of the mountains in the winter time.   I've seen them by river banks.   I've seen them on farms, large estates and backyards.

    Most of the time the details sound worse on here than it really is.   Other times there is indeed poor planning.   

    A tented wedding in July in the mid-west does not have to be a shit show if planned correctly.   DH was flown to Iowa at the end of June to do an outside wedding reception.  They had a barn, but for the most part the wedding was outside.   DH doesn't sugar coast anything and he is overly sensitive to heat and he said it's wasn't bad at all.

    The club I work does wedding.  They are all outdoor weddings (veranda and tents).  We actually do not do any indoor weddings at all.    It will be 90 and sun baring in your eyes at sunset.  Then it drops down to 60 degrees by the end of the night.  We do not have a/c, but there are heaters.

    It sounds horrible when writing it out, but it really isn't bad at all.   I don't hear people complaining (and trust me guests love to complain to the servers).


    So did the barn have AC?  Fans everywhere?  How humid was it?

    Humidity makes a huge difference.  Sure, jack up your oven to 100+ and stick your head in and that "dry heat" is still hot AF, but if there's no humidity then your body's natural AC (sweating) can actually work properly and you can endure being outside for a lot longer.  However, that's in clothing appropriate for heat- tank tops, shorts, sandals.  Even in dry heat I don't want to be outside with no AC in a formal dress or a suit or a tux.

    Now add in 80+ temps and high humidity- Norfolk and Weigh.  There's a reason why the South is full of central air- Because it's miserable.

    Outdoor events on the islands- any island- can be just fine depending on whether or not there's a breeze coming in off of the ocean.  If not, it's still miserable unless you're in the water. . . as miserable as being on an island can ever be ;-)

    I was in the D.R. on the Atlantic side in May and it was 80+ and very, very humid every day so that unless you were in the pool or in the ocean it was stifling in the resort.  Good thing all we did was drink Dirty Monkeys and swim!  And it only cooled down to about 70 with high humidity at night, so you were still sweating your ass off outside.  The folks getting married on the beach each day were sweating through their clothes- I could see it.

    Meanwhile in Hawaii, from what I recall of Oahu, Maui, and the Big Island, I don't recall it being so humid along the coasts and there was always a breeze.

    Does your club have outdoor fans?  Is it in a region that is generally humid or no?  Is there often a breeze?  What's the dress code?  This all makes a difference as to whether or not a formal outdoor event is miserable or not.

    "Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."


  • auriannaaurianna member
    First Anniversary First Answer First Comment 5 Love Its
    edited August 2016
    lyndausvi said:
      I've seen a ton of outdoor weddings.      We did over 100 a year in the islands.  I've seen weddings on boats.  I've seen them on beaches.  I've seen them on top of mountains in the summer time.   And on top of the mountains in the winter time.   I've seen them by river banks.   I've seen them on farms, large estates and backyards.

    Most of the time the details sound worse on here than it really is.   Other times there is indeed poor planning.   

    A tented wedding in July in the mid-west does not have to be a shit show if planned correctly.   DH was flown to Iowa at the end of June to do an outside wedding reception.  They had a barn, but for the most part the wedding was outside.   DH doesn't sugar coast anything and he is overly sensitive to heat and he said it's wasn't bad at all.

    The club I work does wedding.  They are all outdoor weddings (veranda and tents).  We actually do not do any indoor weddings at all.    It will be 90 and sun baring in your eyes at sunset.  Then it drops down to 60 degrees by the end of the night.  We do not have a/c, but there are heaters.

    It sounds horrible when writing it out, but it really isn't bad at all.   I don't hear people complaining (and trust me guests love to complain to the servers).



    Firstly, your first paragraph makes me want to read "Green Eggs and Ham." Have you been to weddings in a box? Have you been to weddings with a fox? ;)

    As far as Iowa wedding goes... my husband used to live near Iowa City so I've spent a lot of time there during the summer and I don't think it touches St. Louis summers in either temperature or humidity (though winters there are quite brutal). But I might be remembering incorrectly (I'm an indoor kitty in general).

    I'm glad your guests don't complain, but if I'm outside for even 10 minutes in 90 degrees with the sun blaring in my eyes, I am not a happy camper. And I just checked. Even in the middle of the night, St. Louis temps never got down to 60 in all of July this year. It's not exactly the same.
  • I don't think this couple was rude in planning the outdoor wedding in July.  Here in July it can range anywhere from 60 to 100 and outdoor weddings are common in the summer.  I've been to several in July that were just fine and no one melted.  I think what was not great hosting was not having a contingency plan for when the weather was clearly going to be inhospitable.  No fans, tent etc. Just some water on the side in a drink cooler.    Just my two cents on that.
  • I think it really depends on the predictability of the weather in mid-July (or any month really). The mid-west is a pretty big place. There's a major difference between the predictability of the weather in Northern Minnesota vs Southern Missouri - both places I would consider "mid-west." In MN - it could reach 100 degrees in Mid-July, but that's not necessarily likely. In Southern MO, it's probably more likely than not to be incredibly hot. If the bride lives in a place where it's extremely likely to hit 100 in mid-July, I think it's inconsiderate and rude to plan an outdoor wedding in that month. Just like it'd be inconsiderate and rude to plan an outdoor wedding in early March in Northern MN - it'd just be too cold!

    Sounds like the bride lives in a place where it can be easily predicted to reach scorching 100 degree temps each and every July, so I'm inclined to think that they were being rude and choosing ~vision~ over guest comfort.
  • lyndausvi said:
      I've seen a ton of outdoor weddings.      We did over 100 a year in the islands.  I've seen weddings on boats.  I've seen them on beaches.  I've seen them on top of mountains in the summer time.   And on top of the mountains in the winter time.   I've seen them by river banks.   I've seen them on farms, large estates and backyards.

    Most of the time the details sound worse on here than it really is.   Other times there is indeed poor planning.   

    A tented wedding in July in the mid-west does not have to be a shit show if planned correctly.   DH was flown to Iowa at the end of June to do an outside wedding reception.  They had a barn, but for the most part the wedding was outside.   DH doesn't sugar coast anything and he is overly sensitive to heat and he said it's wasn't bad at all.

    The club I work does wedding.  They are all outdoor weddings (veranda and tents).  We actually do not do any indoor weddings at all.    It will be 90 and sun baring in your eyes at sunset.  Then it drops down to 60 degrees by the end of the night.  We do not have a/c, but there are heaters.

    It sounds horrible when writing it out, but it really isn't bad at all.   I don't hear people complaining (and trust me guests love to complain to the servers).


    I think it's really all about the environment plus things you can do about it.  

    We went to an outdoor ceremony and a mostly outdoor reception in mid may in Florida.   It wasn't air conditioned but at a beach resort and it was lovely.   DH was in his (brand new) suit and didn't take his jacket off.   This is a guy who HATES to wear long sleeves so much that he generally wears a polo shirt to work in December.   It was fine.

    11 years ago when DH's cousin got married, the after party was in his aunt's backyard and it was 100 degrees.  We were in shorts and drinking keg beer and there was a ton of water.   We had a great time.   We weren't dressed up and had no problems grabbing a hose or more beer to cool off.

    Those who did get too hot were welcomed inside the house.   Girls got to use the toilet inside.  (Trust me - we are a laid back group of people).   

    So I guess my opinion is all in how you execute it?   To date I've only heard a horror story and haven't had to see one. 
  • This still makes me think of a wedding I went to maybe 6 years ago. It was outside on a golf course, and it was supposed to have a tent but it blew over in a big storm a few days before and I guess was ruined because we were sitting in full sun. The guys in suits were sweating but even us ladies in sundresses were too. Then we weren't allowed to go inside, we had to stand outside at least an extra 30 min before they got a few pix set up and then did their receiving line and then finally we could go inside.  It was awful 
  • H wanted our beach wedding to take place in June. In Texas. I asked him why he hated our friends. We pushed it back to mid September, when it's usuly warm but not hot, and our ceremony was in the evening. Of course then we had to worry about hurricanes, but we had an indoor plan for rain or unreasonable heat. I think it was around 80, with a good breeze. Outdoor unshaded ceremony in July? I would decline that with a quickness. 
  • banana468 said:
    lyndausvi said:
      I've seen a ton of outdoor weddings.      We did over 100 a year in the islands.  I've seen weddings on boats.  I've seen them on beaches.  I've seen them on top of mountains in the summer time.   And on top of the mountains in the winter time.   I've seen them by river banks.   I've seen them on farms, large estates and backyards.

    Most of the time the details sound worse on here than it really is.   Other times there is indeed poor planning.   

    A tented wedding in July in the mid-west does not have to be a shit show if planned correctly.   DH was flown to Iowa at the end of June to do an outside wedding reception.  They had a barn, but for the most part the wedding was outside.   DH doesn't sugar coast anything and he is overly sensitive to heat and he said it's wasn't bad at all.

    The club I work does wedding.  They are all outdoor weddings (veranda and tents).  We actually do not do any indoor weddings at all.    It will be 90 and sun baring in your eyes at sunset.  Then it drops down to 60 degrees by the end of the night.  We do not have a/c, but there are heaters.

    It sounds horrible when writing it out, but it really isn't bad at all.   I don't hear people complaining (and trust me guests love to complain to the servers).


    I think it's really all about the environment plus things you can do about it.  

    We went to an outdoor ceremony and a mostly outdoor reception in mid may in Florida.   It wasn't air conditioned but at a beach resort and it was lovely.   DH was in his (brand new) suit and didn't take his jacket off.   This is a guy who HATES to wear long sleeves so much that he generally wears a polo shirt to work in December.   It was fine.

    11 years ago when DH's cousin got married, the after party was in his aunt's backyard and it was 100 degrees.  We were in shorts and drinking keg beer and there was a ton of water.   We had a great time.   We weren't dressed up and had no problems grabbing a hose or more beer to cool off.

    Those who did get too hot were welcomed inside the house.   Girls got to use the toilet inside.  (Trust me - we are a laid back group of people).   

    So I guess my opinion is all in how you execute it?   To date I've only heard a horror story and haven't had to see one. 
    The horror stories are more about bad overall planning than just having outside wedding.

    People are more likely to enjoy an otherwise well hosted outdoor wedding than one that is outdoor and poorly hosted.    

    For example, my wedding.  The good/plentiful food, open bar and dancing made the fact they were under a tent while a tropical storm going on less of an issue.  

    If we didn't have drapes to keep the wind/rain out, didn't have fans, had crappy food and cash bar, what people's impression of our wedding would have been a lot different.

    An outdoor wedding in July in the mid-west can be horrible.  Or it can be executed well.   It's all in the planning.  

    And if it's just not your thing, just decline.  No big deal.  Different strokes for different folks.

    At the club we have this sweet older couple.  He comes to dinner in a jacket, she is cute dress.  They are insulted is we ask if they want to sit outside.  They like inside, not near the a/c, but near a window.    

    98% of the other members get insulted if we offer them a table inside with the a/c, out of the sun.  They will yell at the hostess if they can't get the veranda table in 90 degree weather with the sun blaring in their faces until sunset.   Once the sun goes does the view is amazing, so I get why they "suffer" outside until that happens. 

    Never going to make everyone happy when everyone has different preferences on what is comfortable climate wise.   Just do your best to mitigate the situation and be the best damn host in the areas of food, beverage and entertainment.









    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
  • Seems to me like a lot of extra trouble to have an outdoor wedding at a time when (general) you know your outside environment is very likely going to be uncomfortable. By the time you've set up a shelter and put in AC, fans, or heaters, do you really have the outdoor feeling I assume you were after? Wouldn't it be easier to choose an indoor venue?

    If someone is choosing an outdoor wedding during an almost guaranteed uncomfortable time of year, I'm betting that they want the outdoor setting and won't be moving to a plan B because they planned from the beginning to be outside in uncomfortable weather.
  • edited August 2016
    lyndausvi said:
    banana468 said:
    lyndausvi said:
      I've seen a ton of outdoor weddings.      We did over 100 a year in the islands.  I've seen weddings on boats.  I've seen them on beaches.  I've seen them on top of mountains in the summer time.   And on top of the mountains in the winter time.   I've seen them by river banks.   I've seen them on farms, large estates and backyards.

    Most of the time the details sound worse on here than it really is.   Other times there is indeed poor planning.   

    A tented wedding in July in the mid-west does not have to be a shit show if planned correctly.   DH was flown to Iowa at the end of June to do an outside wedding reception.  They had a barn, but for the most part the wedding was outside.   DH doesn't sugar coast anything and he is overly sensitive to heat and he said it's wasn't bad at all.

    The club I work does wedding.  They are all outdoor weddings (veranda and tents).  We actually do not do any indoor weddings at all.    It will be 90 and sun baring in your eyes at sunset.  Then it drops down to 60 degrees by the end of the night.  We do not have a/c, but there are heaters.

    It sounds horrible when writing it out, but it really isn't bad at all.   I don't hear people complaining (and trust me guests love to complain to the servers).


    I think it's really all about the environment plus things you can do about it.  

    We went to an outdoor ceremony and a mostly outdoor reception in mid may in Florida.   It wasn't air conditioned but at a beach resort and it was lovely.   DH was in his (brand new) suit and didn't take his jacket off.   This is a guy who HATES to wear long sleeves so much that he generally wears a polo shirt to work in December.   It was fine.

    11 years ago when DH's cousin got married, the after party was in his aunt's backyard and it was 100 degrees.  We were in shorts and drinking keg beer and there was a ton of water.   We had a great time.   We weren't dressed up and had no problems grabbing a hose or more beer to cool off.

    Those who did get too hot were welcomed inside the house.   Girls got to use the toilet inside.  (Trust me - we are a laid back group of people).   

    So I guess my opinion is all in how you execute it?   To date I've only heard a horror story and haven't had to see one. 
    The horror stories are more about bad overall planning than just having outside wedding.

    People are more likely to enjoy an otherwise well hosted outdoor wedding than one that is outdoor and poorly hosted.    

    For example, my wedding.  The good/plentiful food, open bar and dancing made the fact they were under a tent while a tropical storm going on less of an issue.  

    If we didn't have drapes to keep the wind/rain out, didn't have fans, had crappy food and cash bar, what people's impression of our wedding would have been a lot different.

    An outdoor wedding in July in the mid-west can be horrible.  Or it can be executed well.   It's all in the planning.  

    And if it's just not your thing, just decline.  No big deal.  Different strokes for different folks.

    At the club we have this sweet older couple.  He comes to dinner in a jacket, she is cute dress.  They are insulted is we ask if they want to sit outside.  They like inside, not near the a/c, but near a window.    

    98% of the other members get insulted if we offer them a table inside with the a/c, out of the sun.  They will yell at the hostess if they can't get the veranda table in 90 degree weather with the sun blaring in their faces until sunset.   Once the sun goes does the view is amazing, so I get why they "suffer" outside until that happens. 

    Never going to make everyone happy when everyone has different preferences on what is comfortable climate wise.   Just do your best to mitigate the situation and be the best damn host in the areas of food, beverage and entertainment.



    Do you have outdoor fans?  Umbrellas over the tables for shade or awnings of any type?  Is there a breeze?  How humid is it?

    Some people are just nuts and enjoy melting off their faces :-P

    The rest of us appreciate shade and fans at the very least.

    I agree that part of the bad hosting aspect comes from not planning properly and failing to have adequate measures in place to mitigate the weather- tents, fans/heaters, etc.



    "Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."


  • geebee908 said:
    Seems to me like a lot of extra trouble to have an outdoor wedding at a time when (general) you know your outside environment is very likely going to be uncomfortable. By the time you've set up a shelter and put in AC, fans, or heaters, do you really have the outdoor feeling I assume you were after? Wouldn't it be easier to choose an indoor venue?

    If someone is choosing an outdoor wedding during an almost guaranteed uncomfortable time of year, I'm betting that they want the outdoor setting and won't be moving to a plan B because they planned from the beginning to be outside in uncomfortable weather.
    It depends on the setup.   Unless it's raining we do not put down the tent walls so they can see the view.  You are on grass (or beach in the islands).  Yes, you lose some of the heat/air but it's not bad out there.  People are not freezing or melting.

    If you have all the walls down, then yes it could lose some of the outdoor feel.  

    At our wedding we had the walls down because of the rain, but once the rain passed the walls went up and you could feel the ocean breeze so it was nice, outdoor feel.






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
  • I was in a wedding last Labor Day weekend in Western NY; it was 85 degrees, humid , and direct sun. It was on a beach and the sand was hot. There was no shade, the bride was late so the ceremony started like 20 minutes late, there was no water for any of the guests. The couple knew the weather was going to be super hot (it was at he rehearsal the day before) and they didn't care. After being super hot all day with very little water people were super unhappy. They didn't have the big dance party atmosphere they wanted after dinner because people were hot, tired, and sweaty.  

    So inherently rude? Maybe not but it's been my experience that since outdoor weddings tend to be all about the view or backdrop that gets prioritized over guests comfort. Or people pay for an outdoor ceremony and don't want to "lose out" on what they're paying for they insist the ceremony is held outside, heat and sun be damned. 
  • lyndausvi said:
    banana468 said:
    lyndausvi said:
      I've seen a ton of outdoor weddings.      We did over 100 a year in the islands.  I've seen weddings on boats.  I've seen them on beaches.  I've seen them on top of mountains in the summer time.   And on top of the mountains in the winter time.   I've seen them by river banks.   I've seen them on farms, large estates and backyards.

    Most of the time the details sound worse on here than it really is.   Other times there is indeed poor planning.   

    A tented wedding in July in the mid-west does not have to be a shit show if planned correctly.   DH was flown to Iowa at the end of June to do an outside wedding reception.  They had a barn, but for the most part the wedding was outside.   DH doesn't sugar coast anything and he is overly sensitive to heat and he said it's wasn't bad at all.

    The club I work does wedding.  They are all outdoor weddings (veranda and tents).  We actually do not do any indoor weddings at all.    It will be 90 and sun baring in your eyes at sunset.  Then it drops down to 60 degrees by the end of the night.  We do not have a/c, but there are heaters.

    It sounds horrible when writing it out, but it really isn't bad at all.   I don't hear people complaining (and trust me guests love to complain to the servers).


    I think it's really all about the environment plus things you can do about it.  

    We went to an outdoor ceremony and a mostly outdoor reception in mid may in Florida.   It wasn't air conditioned but at a beach resort and it was lovely.   DH was in his (brand new) suit and didn't take his jacket off.   This is a guy who HATES to wear long sleeves so much that he generally wears a polo shirt to work in December.   It was fine.

    11 years ago when DH's cousin got married, the after party was in his aunt's backyard and it was 100 degrees.  We were in shorts and drinking keg beer and there was a ton of water.   We had a great time.   We weren't dressed up and had no problems grabbing a hose or more beer to cool off.

    Those who did get too hot were welcomed inside the house.   Girls got to use the toilet inside.  (Trust me - we are a laid back group of people).   

    So I guess my opinion is all in how you execute it?   To date I've only heard a horror story and haven't had to see one. 
    The horror stories are more about bad overall planning than just having outside wedding.

    People are more likely to enjoy an otherwise well hosted outdoor wedding than one that is outdoor and poorly hosted.    

    For example, my wedding.  The good/plentiful food, open bar and dancing made the fact they were under a tent while a tropical storm going on less of an issue.  

    If we didn't have drapes to keep the wind/rain out, didn't have fans, had crappy food and cash bar, what people's impression of our wedding would have been a lot different.

    An outdoor wedding in July in the mid-west can be horrible.  Or it can be executed well.   It's all in the planning.  

    And if it's just not your thing, just decline.  No big deal.  Different strokes for different folks.

    At the club we have this sweet older couple.  He comes to dinner in a jacket, she is cute dress.  They are insulted is we ask if they want to sit outside.  They like inside, not near the a/c, but near a window.    

    98% of the other members get insulted if we offer them a table inside with the a/c, out of the sun.  They will yell at the hostess if they can't get the veranda table in 90 degree weather with the sun blaring in their faces until sunset.   Once the sun goes does the view is amazing, so I get why they "suffer" outside until that happens. 

    Never going to make everyone happy when everyone has different preferences on what is comfortable climate wise.   Just do your best to mitigate the situation and be the best damn host in the areas of food, beverage and entertainment.



    Do you have outdoor fans?  Umbrellas over the tables for shade or awnings of any type?  Is there a breeze?  How humid is it?

    Some people are just nuts and enjoy melting off their faces :-P

    The rest of us appreciate shade and fans at the very least.

    I agree that part of the bad hosting aspect comes from not planning properly and failing to have adequate measures in place to mitigate the weather- tents, fans/heaters, etc.


    There are a few ceiling fans, but do not provide much of a breeze.  The upper has a covered roof.  The lower one has awnings, but when the sun hit a certain point the sky is doesn't provide any shade at either location.   If it's too breezy the awnings retract on their own so they do not break.  Luckily it's not often, but there are times when you do not even have those.     

    It's not too humid, but all things are relative to what you are use too.  I've lived in Houston, I've lived in NOLA.  I know humidity, but sometimes it's still hot too me.   I have to work out there and I go inside to pretend to do something to get out of the heat.

    Then on some days about an hour after the sun goes down the heaters come on.   It's really funny how extreme the temperature gets here.

    Last night it was rainy and cold.   Half the guests wanted to sit on the upper veranda under the heat lamps, the other half inside.  

    I mean, I do not get why people want to sit outside in a damp, cool veranda under a heat lamp when they can sit in a nice dry environment inside, but trust me that is what some people prefer.    If these people do not mind doing that on their own time, they would not think about attending a wedding under the same circumstances.






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
  • CMGragainCMGragain member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    edited August 2016
    scribe95 said:
    I find holding a wedding outdoors in extreme heat to be ill-mannered and impolite - which by the way, is the definition of rude. 

    Also @CMGragain - you told a poster recently that it was rude to comment on an old thread but somehow hosting an outdoor wedding in 95 degrees isn't?
    What does this have to do with anything?

    I think having a wedding outdoors in July heat is a terrible idea.  The bride is seeking to fulfill her "wedding vision".  This is not rude, but it is selfish.  I am in no way defending the bride.  I would not attend such a wedding.

    It would be rude for the bride to not have a reception after her ceremony.
    It would be rude for the bride to demand wedding gifts.
    It would be rude for the bride to neglect to thank her guests for attending her wedding.
    It would be rude for the bride to neglect to send thank you notes for the gifts.
    These are all customs that are followed in polite society.  To not follow them is rude.  To plan an outdoor wedding in the summer heat is just stupid and inconsiderate.
    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg

  • I live in the North East.  It's 93 degrees here with the heat index, 57% humidity. . .I got off a frigid bus, crossed the street and stood in the shade for 5 minutes waiting for my 2nd frigid bus, and the sweat is dripping down my back and I have swamp bra. . .from standing in the shade for 5 mins in capris, a thin t-shirt, and sandals.

    If you're planning an outdoor wedding for a day like today, you better have a tent equipped with those Big Ass Fans or AC.

    "Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."


  • edited August 2016
    "Inconsiderate" is a close cousin of "rude." 

    There's also an important (IMO) distinction: 1. Does the bride/couple not know any better? Or 2. Do they know better but not care?

    Not that ignorance makes anything less rude or inconsiderate, but it might explain the logic behind said rudeness/inconsideration.
  • SP29SP29 member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    I don't think it's rude per se... I agree that it comes down to the execution.

    Do you have a back up option? Fans? Shade? Cool drinks?

    I've been to two outdoor ceremonies in summer- both beautiful, and comfortable. One offered handheld fans, and had a bit of shade. The other was at 5:30pm. Both had receptions indoors. One could have had the ceremony indoors if need be. At other wedding, the A/C unit broke at the reception, so guests were sweating their faces off inside. Guests spent large parts of the dance portion outside the venue.

    Personally, I would not want a wedding June-Sept in southern Ontario. We got married in January, indoors ;). As well as other reasons, I as the bride, didn't want to be sweating in August.
  • I went to an outdoor wedding last month. No one knew it was outside because it was at a location that has indoor rooms that can be rented for events and it was not mentioned on the website or anywhere else.  It was 102 that day with horrid humidity.

    It. Was. Awful. Only about 1/4 of the seats were in the shade. Luckily we got there early and snagged some shade seats. There was water, but I finished mine before the ceremony started (late) and there weren't any bottles left. The ceremony was a long one. Lots of family anecdotes and childhood stories about how they were perfect together.

    They took an hour after the ceremony for pictures and the only thing hosted (still outside) was lemonade that had been sitting out during the ceremony. We waited just long enough to say goodbye to the couple on their way to the reception (also still outside). My husband was covered in bug bites when we got home.

    Maybe it's not rude, but it sure as hell was not pleasant as a guest and had I known it was outside, I would not have attended.
  • ei34ei34 member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    Attended my cousin's son's 1st birthday party at a farm today...90 degrees and disgustingly humid here in Queens, NY.  We were there for an hour and a half, in tshirts and shorts, sweating profusely.  Wouldn't you know there was a wedding also taking place.  Guests is suits and dresses, makeup running down ladies' faces, no ACs or huge fans in sight.  It made me think of this post.  I couldn't imagine staying at that wedding very long at all.
  • 100 bottles of water, and they were all gone. Unless this was a wedding for 20 thirsty people, that was not nearly enough. I think it's pretty clear that this was not an example of a properly executed outdoor event.

  • AddieCake said:
    I think deliberately planning an outdoor wedding in the middle of summer is awful. It would certainly have been more convenient for me as a teacher to do it in the summer, but we were in TX, we wanted an outdoor ceremony, and we're not assholes.
    Where did you get married btw? That waterfall background is stunning!
    HAHAHAHA!!! I am such an idiot. All this time I've been on TK I thought Addie's photos showed like a white trellis/arbor type thing. 
    Me too!

  • While I think it's incredibly rude to hold an outdoor ceremony in any temperature over 80 degrees, I see where CMG is coming from. There are places in the country where a July outdoor wedding could be 90 degrees or could be 78 degrees depending on the year. So simply inviting someone to an outdoor wedding in July is not rude, but what's rude is holding the wedding outdoors when it turns out this is the year it's 90 degrees outside. ALL outdoor weddings regardless of the time of year should have an indoor option, even Florida weddings in January need a backup. Not providing for an indoor option is what's rude.
  • While I think it's incredibly rude to hold an outdoor ceremony in any temperature over 80 degrees, I see where CMG is coming from. There are places in the country where a July outdoor wedding could be 90 degrees or could be 78 degrees depending on the year. So simply inviting someone to an outdoor wedding in July is not rude, but what's rude is holding the wedding outdoors when it turns out this is the year it's 90 degrees outside. ALL outdoor weddings regardless of the time of year should have an indoor option, even Florida weddings in January need a backup. Not providing for an indoor option is what's rude.
    And / or some aspect of being able to plan for contingencies.   Get the water, find the tent sides, get ACs or Heaters outside.

    And if you know that your area can be hot during that time of the year (like here in CT where the temp could be 100 or a 65 degree rain), FFS don't make it formal. 
  • We live in the Midwest and got married in July. When our venue coordinator suggested we get married outside we laughed at his joke. We assumed it was a joke, had to be bc hell to the no, that wasn't happening. When he persisted, I said I wasn't going to have people passing out so our ceremony photos would be a little better.
    :kiss: ~xoxo~ :kiss:

  • *Raises hand*

    We had a mid-July wedding (ceremony only) outdoors. Fortunately, it wasn't humid at all and the ceremony wasn't until 4:30 so it was about 80ish degrees. Really beautiful day. We got very lucky.

    We had a tent ready in case of rain and we had an indoor plan in case of heat/humidity/extreme wind (we got married on a bridge)/anything else.

    I think the biggest mistake most outdoor wedding Bs&Gs make is that they're so dedicated to their vision that it skews their judgment when they have to set thresholds for when to move inside. Or they're stupid enough not to have/budget a back up plan at all. They also seem to think the only element to be concerned about is precipitation when really it's that, it's temperature, it's intense sun, it's humidity, it's wind, it's bugs, it's mud... And 90 degrees is different in a tshirt and shorts than in suits and formal dresses.

    *********************************************************************************

    image
  • *Raises hand*

    We had a mid-July wedding (ceremony only) outdoors. Fortunately, it wasn't humid at all and the ceremony wasn't until 4:30 so it was about 80ish degrees. Really beautiful day. We got very lucky.

    We had a tent ready in case of rain and we had an indoor plan in case of heat/humidity/extreme wind (we got married on a bridge)/anything else.

    I think the biggest mistake most outdoor wedding Bs&Gs make is that they're so dedicated to their vision that it skews their judgment when they have to set thresholds for when to move inside. Or they're stupid enough not to have/budget a back up plan at all. They also seem to think the only element to be concerned about is precipitation when really it's that, it's temperature, it's intense sun, it's humidity, it's wind, it's bugs, it's mud... And 90 degrees is different in a tshirt and shorts than in suits and formal dresses.

    This exactly. It's not outdoor weddings that are inherently rude, but not realizing that your guests are uncomfortable and you should move things inside. 
  • *Raises hand*

    We had a mid-July wedding (ceremony only) outdoors. Fortunately, it wasn't humid at all and the ceremony wasn't until 4:30 so it was about 80ish degrees. Really beautiful day. We got very lucky.

    We had a tent ready in case of rain and we had an indoor plan in case of heat/humidity/extreme wind (we got married on a bridge)/anything else.

    I think the biggest mistake most outdoor wedding Bs&Gs make is that they're so dedicated to their vision that it skews their judgment when they have to set thresholds for when to move inside. Or they're stupid enough not to have/budget a back up plan at all. They also seem to think the only element to be concerned about is precipitation when really it's that, it's temperature, it's intense sun, it's humidity, it's wind, it's bugs, it's mud... And 90 degrees is different in a tshirt and shorts than in suits and formal dresses.

    This exactly. It's not outdoor weddings that are inherently rude, but not realizing that your guests are uncomfortable and you should move things inside. 
    That's exactly the point.   You can have a great outdoor wedding but I think too many brides get the Father of the Bride vision in their heads and forget that reality is a different thing.   
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