I'm looking for opinions or thoughts from people who maybe have been in a situation like this before. A few months ago my friend asked me to be a Bridesmaid in her wedding. My response was "of course I'm honored to be in included in your special day in any way that you would like." I truly mean that and am happy to be involved. The thing that I find myself still stuck on was her response to me. She apologized for not asking me to be her Maid of Honor, and told me that she felt like she had to ask another friend of hers to be the Maid of Honor because that friend had asked her if she could be the Maid of Honor years ago. When my friend told me this I was so surprised that I sort of shut her explanation down by telling her that this was her choice and that I support whoever she wants involved for whatever reason. I also didn't think this friend being the Maid of Honor was all that weird because they are very close, what was weird to me was the explanation.
My problem is that months later I still feel myself replaying this conversation. I really can't tell if she told me this because she was worried my feelings would be hurt for not being asked and is maybe making the other friend the bad guy to keep from having some sort of conflict. Or if maybe she really felt forced into having this person be the Maid of Honor when she would have preferred someone else. Either one makes me sad because on one hand I would hope that she could just be up front with me about her desire for what role she would like me to play (I think that I'm really very supportive and not one to cause drama at all). On the other hand I find it sad that she might have felt forced into doing something on her special day that she doesn't want. I've talked to a few people who know everyone involved but aren't in the wedding themselves, and they think that she probably did feel forced. I'm really not sure if I should bring this up with my friend again since I kind of shut her down before, my inclination is to let her bring it up at some point if she wants to, but I'm also still somewhat confused about where she's at. Mostly I'm looking for insights from other people who maybe experienced something similar so that I can better understand the situation. Me and this friend are so different that I can't imagine anyone ever putting me in the position that she said she was in so I'm having some trouble relating.