Wedding Woes

Sooo...Monday?

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Re: Sooo...Monday?

  • I would do the DNA thing just for the family tree aspect, but, after meeting what came out of the woodwork when my father added himself to the adoption registry when they opened it up in the late 90s, I'm so very afraid. 
  • My mum's considered the 23 & Me because her dad isn't her biological dad, so she's always wondered about that part of her life.

    So yes @ShesSoCold let us know what you can about it! :)

    @kimmiinthemitten how were your results? Did it say health related things also?
    You have to pay more for the health, I probably will since my mom's blindness is genetic and we don't know from where and her deafness could be too.  The best part of that, is you can add it on at any time so already I submitted my DNA I can still get the results later.

    Most of mine was expected - British (Dads surname), German (Paternal Grandmas surname), Scottish (maternal Grandpas surname).

    The parts that kind of surprised me was the Italian/Greek/Middle Eastern.  I always get asked if I'm Italian or Lebanese, so it really just backed up what most people think I look like I guess.

    H's the whitest white guy on the planet with his 50% Hungarian, 50% British Isles heritage so he said it was the most unanticipated thing he's ever done.
    image
  • I would do the DNA thing just for the family tree aspect, but, after meeting what came out of the woodwork when my father added himself to the adoption registry when they opened it up in the late 90s, I'm so very afraid. 


    I'm quite interested in this story, but you don't have to have your results shared with anyone or put out for comparison.

    And this made me want to do mine even more now too; I have a half brother from my dad's first marriage that no one has ever met (well, except my dad, I guess, but he hasn't seen the kid since 1971 when he was 2). I always wonder if this guy is as curious about us as we are about him.

    Image result for someecard betting someone half your shit youll love them forever
  • I would do the DNA thing just for the family tree aspect, but, after meeting what came out of the woodwork when my father added himself to the adoption registry when they opened it up in the late 90s, I'm so very afraid. 


    I'm quite interested in this story, but you don't have to have your results shared with anyone or put out for comparison.

    And this made me want to do mine even more now too; I have a half brother from my dad's first marriage that no one has ever met (well, except my dad, I guess, but he hasn't seen the kid since 1971 when he was 2). I always wonder if this guy is as curious about us as we are about him.


    My BFF discovered a sister from an affair through FB about 10 years ago and was devastated by the news.  And said sister ended up being legit nuts, like created fake accounts for each of them and had fake FB posts etc about it nuts.

    I kept her situation in mind and reminded myself that these stories aren't always good and not everyone wants to be found in mind and am glad it worked out.

    I wonder if you can do it and open up your results later so you could see your break down now and if you want to explore matches later have that option.
    image
  • I would do the DNA thing just for the family tree aspect, but, after meeting what came out of the woodwork when my father added himself to the adoption registry when they opened it up in the late 90s, I'm so very afraid. 


    I'm quite interested in this story, but you don't have to have your results shared with anyone or put out for comparison.

    And this made me want to do mine even more now too; I have a half brother from my dad's first marriage that no one has ever met (well, except my dad, I guess, but he hasn't seen the kid since 1971 when he was 2). I always wonder if this guy is as curious about us as we are about him.

    My father was given up for adoption in the 50s. He has a full biological older brother who was given up for adoption a couple of years previous. He found my father when Ontario allowed the adoption records to be opened up. He then found several half sisters who were, for want of a better word, "interesting". Since the brother didn't live here, and my father did, he peaced out when things got a little crazy and left my dad to clean up the mess. I don't really want to re-open that book. 
  • This is what the ancestry part looks like for anyone who is interested:


    image
  • I would do the DNA thing just for the family tree aspect, but, after meeting what came out of the woodwork when my father added himself to the adoption registry when they opened it up in the late 90s, I'm so very afraid. 


    I'm quite interested in this story, but you don't have to have your results shared with anyone or put out for comparison.

    And this made me want to do mine even more now too; I have a half brother from my dad's first marriage that no one has ever met (well, except my dad, I guess, but he hasn't seen the kid since 1971 when he was 2). I always wonder if this guy is as curious about us as we are about him.

    My father was given up for adoption in the 50s. He has a full biological older brother who was given up for adoption a couple of years previous. He found my father when Ontario allowed the adoption records to be opened up. He then found several half sisters who were, for want of a better word, "interesting". Since the brother didn't live here, and my father did, he peaced out when things got a little crazy and left my dad to clean up the mess. I don't really want to re-open that book. 

    Oof - who could blame you?
    image
  • Can I just tell you about my weekend? because, sheez, I need to swear more. (I joked with a guest at work that the [very fussy, counterintuitive] registers tried to make me swear in spite of working at a children's museum and it fell REALLY flat. Apparently the kind, never get worse than 'oh darn it' facade is not something I"m supposed to admit is a facade).
    There is probably some TMI in here...

    Where we left things, we were worried about flooding, that DIDN"T HAPPEN, HUZZAH! Because Saturday and SUnday = HUGE fundraiser at work. everyone works. tons of volunteers. tons of people. amazing stuff. 

    Saturday was the Mr's birthday, so Friday night, I made a cake...which literally fell apart. I gave up, didn't have more ingredients, wasn't feeling well...and eventually went to bed. 
    So, I spent most of friday night up, because my digestive tract was VERY unhappy. SO, on 2ish hours of sleep, I show up on Saturday morning. I jump in with both feet, I pretend I"m fine, and then I was not fine. I shoved my way through volunteer orientation to escape and throw up. (and I never throw up. I feel like it a lot, but, I deal w/ nausea a LOT--my migraines come w/ nausea and sometimes vomiting--I have excellent ways fo knowing when I approach the 'really going to puke' line and dealing w/ it)

    I told the boss that I was violently ill, I'd try to soldier through, but, I'd be bending some rules (like sitting at work stations, less interactive, etc).

    And, of course, I realize then, that I've thrown up at least part of the daily preventative migraine pills...and I did have a migraine (it was about day 10 of the same one), so the migraine (which comes w/ nausea and vomiting), is going to get worse. ANd I've got both ends with problems. I get a few extra breaks, soldier through, wrap myself in multiple layers and arrive home shivering, with a 104 fever. The Mr. makes me take fever reducers, eventually the fever breaks naturally, around 3? am I think. I still feel like shit but drag my ass in on Sunday, to do more of the same.

    The day was a success. I didn't throw up on anyone; I did powerwalk to bathrooms a few times and apparently had the 'don't interrupt me, I"m turning green' look, because people avoided me.

    Got Buffy on the bus this AM, then went back to bed...and the Mr. is kinda feeling crappy, and BOTH of us slept through the scheduled therapy phone consult about new services. Because we suck. whoops. I'll apologize profusely tonight.

    And now I"m vertical and I've kept down jello and fruit cocktail. off to consider real food. like toast.

  • I would do the DNA thing just for the family tree aspect, but, after meeting what came out of the woodwork when my father added himself to the adoption registry when they opened it up in the late 90s, I'm so very afraid. 


    I'm quite interested in this story, but you don't have to have your results shared with anyone or put out for comparison.

    And this made me want to do mine even more now too; I have a half brother from my dad's first marriage that no one has ever met (well, except my dad, I guess, but he hasn't seen the kid since 1971 when he was 2). I always wonder if this guy is as curious about us as we are about him.

    My father was given up for adoption in the 50s. He has a full biological older brother who was given up for adoption a couple of years previous. He found my father when Ontario allowed the adoption records to be opened up. He then found several half sisters who were, for want of a better word, "interesting". Since the brother didn't live here, and my father did, he peaced out when things got a little crazy and left my dad to clean up the mess. I don't really want to re-open that book. 

    Oof - who could blame you?
    I do want to find out what our mutt background is though...
  • My mum's considered the 23 & Me because her dad isn't her biological dad, so she's always wondered about that part of her life.

    So yes @ShesSoCold let us know what you can about it! :)

    @kimmiinthemitten how were your results? Did it say health related things also?
    You have to pay more for the health, I probably will since my mom's blindness is genetic and we don't know from where and her deafness could be too.  The best part of that, is you can add it on at any time so already I submitted my DNA I can still get the results later.

    Most of mine was expected - British (Dads surname), German (Paternal Grandmas surname), Scottish (maternal Grandpas surname).

    The parts that kind of surprised me was the Italian/Greek/Middle Eastern.  I always get asked if I'm Italian or Lebanese, so it really just backed up what most people think I look like I guess.

    H's the whitest white guy on the planet with his 50% Hungarian, 50% British Isles heritage so he said it was the most unanticipated thing he's ever done.
    I think she'd pay the extra for health, given she has no info on that side.

    I'd wanna do it just to know my background {not healthwise, I'll assume mine based on hers} but I'm like your H - a lot of very fair skinned background lol! But I've been asked so many times on what specifics. Some I know, some I don't but it's all interesting info.
  • @shessocold you might find a lot of Great Britain in your results as apparently there is a lot of Germanic influence from migration. My results were 49% Great Britain and 24% western Europe (France, Germany, etc). I was surprised at how it was more GB than Germany since both of my parents have German sides but then I learned that there was a lot of migration from Germany to GB way back when which is likely why the results are that way. 
  • My mum's considered the 23 & Me because her dad isn't her biological dad, so she's always wondered about that part of her life.

    So yes @ShesSoCold let us know what you can about it! :)

    @kimmiinthemitten how were your results? Did it say health related things also?
    You have to pay more for the health, I probably will since my mom's blindness is genetic and we don't know from where and her deafness could be too.  The best part of that, is you can add it on at any time so already I submitted my DNA I can still get the results later.

    Most of mine was expected - British (Dads surname), German (Paternal Grandmas surname), Scottish (maternal Grandpas surname).

    The parts that kind of surprised me was the Italian/Greek/Middle Eastern.  I always get asked if I'm Italian or Lebanese, so it really just backed up what most people think I look like I guess.

    H's the whitest white guy on the planet with his 50% Hungarian, 50% British Isles heritage so he said it was the most unanticipated thing he's ever done.


    Correct me if I'm wrong, but I thought the DNA tests really only tell you the area(s) of the world that have the most similar DNA to you.  Not necessarily that this is really where one's ancestry is from.

    Because it's possible to have DNA most similar to Area X, but your ancestry really hails more from Area Y.

    @TrixieJess, I haven't looked into it for a number of years.  Maybe it is better now.  But I heard bad reviews for the pet DNA tests.  At the time, even the sites themselves said that the more breeds your dog was made up of, the least likely the DNA test would be to work.  There were lots of stories of people sending in DNA for their purebred dog and getting back some completely off the wall, wacky result. 

    But I hear ya!  I would love to know what breeds my little pound baby is made up of.  She has the face and coloring of a Boston terrier.  But with medium length fur and a stockier body.

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  • @short+sassy  Yes, that's correct.  Pre WWII borders changed so much in Europe, for example, that your family could hail from Slovakia but you're actually Hungarian.  It also shows regions for the most part and groups of countries.

    But when you are able to pair with your family tree and when and where your ancestors came from, you can fill in a lot of holes.
    image
  • My mum's considered the 23 & Me because her dad isn't her biological dad, so she's always wondered about that part of her life.

    So yes @ShesSoCold let us know what you can about it! :)

    @kimmiinthemitten how were your results? Did it say health related things also?
    You have to pay more for the health, I probably will since my mom's blindness is genetic and we don't know from where and her deafness could be too.  The best part of that, is you can add it on at any time so already I submitted my DNA I can still get the results later.

    Most of mine was expected - British (Dads surname), German (Paternal Grandmas surname), Scottish (maternal Grandpas surname).

    The parts that kind of surprised me was the Italian/Greek/Middle Eastern.  I always get asked if I'm Italian or Lebanese, so it really just backed up what most people think I look like I guess.

    H's the whitest white guy on the planet with his 50% Hungarian, 50% British Isles heritage so he said it was the most unanticipated thing he's ever done.


    Correct me if I'm wrong, but I thought the DNA tests really only tell you the area(s) of the world that have the most similar DNA to you.  Not necessarily that this is really where one's ancestry is from.

    Because it's possible to have DNA most similar to Area X, but your ancestry really hails more from Area Y.

    @TrixieJess, I haven't looked into it for a number of years.  Maybe it is better now.  But I heard bad reviews for the pet DNA tests.  At the time, even the sites themselves said that the more breeds your dog was made up of, the least likely the DNA test would be to work.  There were lots of stories of people sending in DNA for their purebred dog and getting back some completely off the wall, wacky result. 

    But I hear ya!  I would love to know what breeds my little pound baby is made up of.  She has the face and coloring of a Boston terrier.  But with medium length fur and a stockier body.

    LOL, I was referring to myself as a mutt :) My mother's family we can trace back 400 years, and we have a mix of Scottish, English, German, Danish, and Russian in there. My father's is a bit more of an enigma. He and I have distinctly, either Indigenous, or Asian features, and his birth family is from the Northern part of the country so there is a possibility with the English, French and German that he knows of, that there is Native or Asian in there as well. 
  • GBCK - That is a shitty weekend!  I cursed for you ;)  You powered through and hopefully on the better end of your illness and migraine.
  • @kvruns - interesting! I should have gotten myself one too!

    @TrixieJess yikes that sounds like a lot!

    @Kimmiinthemitten wow how terrible for your friend! I'm sorry! I wonder how my brother guy would react to us contacting him. Most of what I know points to the fact that he knows about my dad, but what if he doesn't? Could you imagine getting a random phone call saying, "Hi, your dad isn't your dad and this is your sister you never knew you had"? That would be TERRIBLE. And this guy is 48; his dad could be deceased.

    @GBCK ugh that sounds MISERABLE. Good for you for powering through and I hope you feel better soon.



    Image result for someecard betting someone half your shit youll love them forever
  • My mum's considered the 23 & Me because her dad isn't her biological dad, so she's always wondered about that part of her life.

    So yes @ShesSoCold let us know what you can about it! :)

    @kimmiinthemitten how were your results? Did it say health related things also?
    You have to pay more for the health, I probably will since my mom's blindness is genetic and we don't know from where and her deafness could be too.  The best part of that, is you can add it on at any time so already I submitted my DNA I can still get the results later.

    Most of mine was expected - British (Dads surname), German (Paternal Grandmas surname), Scottish (maternal Grandpas surname).

    The parts that kind of surprised me was the Italian/Greek/Middle Eastern.  I always get asked if I'm Italian or Lebanese, so it really just backed up what most people think I look like I guess.

    H's the whitest white guy on the planet with his 50% Hungarian, 50% British Isles heritage so he said it was the most unanticipated thing he's ever done.


    Correct me if I'm wrong, but I thought the DNA tests really only tell you the area(s) of the world that have the most similar DNA to you.  Not necessarily that this is really where one's ancestry is from.

    Because it's possible to have DNA most similar to Area X, but your ancestry really hails more from Area Y.

    @TrixieJess, I haven't looked into it for a number of years.  Maybe it is better now.  But I heard bad reviews for the pet DNA tests.  At the time, even the sites themselves said that the more breeds your dog was made up of, the least likely the DNA test would be to work.  There were lots of stories of people sending in DNA for their purebred dog and getting back some completely off the wall, wacky result. 

    But I hear ya!  I would love to know what breeds my little pound baby is made up of.  She has the face and coloring of a Boston terrier.  But with medium length fur and a stockier body.

    LOL, I was referring to myself as a mutt :) My mother's family we can trace back 400 years, and we have a mix of Scottish, English, German, Danish, and Russian in there. My father's is a bit more of an enigma. He and I have distinctly, either Indigenous, or Asian features, and his birth family is from the Northern part of the country so there is a possibility with the English, French and German that he knows of, that there is Native or Asian in there as well. 

    Oh, that's hilarious!  Mutts are the best :).  Both people and dogs.

    That's amazing you all can trace your family back 400 years on your mom's side.

    I come from a long line of island people, lol.  We can trace our family back (mom's side) to the mid 1800's.  They came from the Azores before immigrating to Hawaii to work on the sugar plantations in the late 1800's.  My mom was born in HI.  We could probably go back further from the Azores records, but nobody speaks Portuguese anymore.  Per my grandma, Portuguese is what her parents spoke when they didn't want the kids to understand what they were saying, lol.

    My dad's side is a little sketchier.  His mom didn't know much about her heritage.  His dad's family immigrated from Germany in 1908. 

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  • LOL, I was referring to myself as a mutt :)My mother's family we can trace back 400 years, and we have a mix of Scottish, English, German, Danish, and Russian in there. My father's is a bit more of an enigma. He and I have distinctly, either Indigenous, or Asian features, and his birth family is from the Northern part of the country so there is a possibility with the English, French and German that he knows of, that there is Native or Asian in there as well. 

    Oh, that's hilarious!  Mutts are the best :).  Both people and dogs.


    Random, but you can also get your dog's DNA, too. 

    https://www.wisdompanel.com/
  • @short+sassy  Yes, that's correct.  Pre WWII borders changed so much in Europe, for example, that your family could hail from Slovakia but you're actually Hungarian.  It also shows regions for the most part and groups of countries.

    But when you are able to pair with your family tree and when and where your ancestors came from, you can fill in a lot of holes.

    Great!  That is exactly what I thought.  I will continue heavily side-eying the commercials that try to gaslight people in thinking this is some "definite" and exact thing.  It certainly makes a lot more sense it is associated with regions of the world, than specific countries.  But even that isn't a definite.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • I have been doing genealogy since 1971 - before DNA help.  Most of you know that I came from a bat-shit crazy family.  Doing family research helped me understand them a little better.

    I am 100% northern European.  (Sigh!)  I was hoping for more diversity, but no.

    My maternal great grandmother is a mystery.  She was an emotional abused, twisted lady whose husband abandoned her and three kids and who's "family" (if they were actually her family) disowned her on her wedding day.  She did the same to my beloved grandmother.

    Professional researcher were not able to find anything about her history in Chicago.  It is as if she never existed.  My strong suspicion is that she may have been illegitimate and given to other people to raise.  There is a large portion of Irish DNA that is unaccounted for in my test.  (This year I really will celebrate St. Patrick's Day!  Woo-hoo!)

    Though my DNA connects me with this lady (Mrs. Smith), I never met her.  I was 17 when she died and she never knew or wanted to know of my existence.  Too bad all DNA reunions aren't happy ending stories.  I probably didn't really want to meet her.

    My point is, you are what God made you.  You have physical characteristics and medical history from your DNA, but you are the beautiful person created by God, and you can go as far in life as you can and wish to do.  You can build a family of loving people who care about each other.  It is interesting to see where your physical roots are from, but the future is up to you.

    The only "bad" DNA I have ever seen is from DH's family.  Five siblings were diagnosed with hereditary spastic parapelegia.  It is incurable. It usually surfaces during early adulthood.  Most of DH's cousins now have it.  DH's Dad was the only one of six children who did not inherit the gene for it.  DH actually helped fund and support a study group for it about 30 years ago.  We had the DNA test done on Grandad's deathbed.  It has eased our minds.

    Beautiful ladies, go live your lives with confidence, and the knowledge that the diversity in your genes will create a beautiful future for you and your family.

    Irish?  Who, ME????
    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
  • I haven’t done a genealogy test myself but an old co worker of mine found out her granddad wasn’t actually her grandad (or her mother’s father). I think it was deathbed confession from grandma that led them to do the test. Co- worker also had a suspicion that her dad wasn’t her bio dad due to her close resemblance to a close family friend but she wasn’t bothered enough to test.

    it doesn’t surprise me that the DNA is showing other heritages. The trade routes between the Mediterranean and the Middle East were strong. I didn’t realize until I went to Greece and among these ancient structures were Arabic carvings and inscriptions. Even then, if I wasn’t living in the Middle East, I might not have recognized the writing as Arabic. People may have lived in Germany for generations and consider themselves 100% German but that doesn’t mean they didn’t start somewhere else.
  • I haven’t done a genealogy test myself but an old co worker of mine found out her granddad wasn’t actually her grandad (or her mother’s father). I think it was deathbed confession from grandma that led them to do the test. Co- worker also had a suspicion that her dad wasn’t her bio dad due to her close resemblance to a close family friend but she wasn’t bothered enough to test.

    it doesn’t surprise me that the DNA is showing other heritages. The trade routes between the Mediterranean and the Middle East were strong. I didn’t realize until I went to Greece and among these ancient structures were Arabic carvings and inscriptions. Even then, if I wasn’t living in the Middle East, I might not have recognized the writing as Arabic. People may have lived in Germany for generations and consider themselves 100% German but that doesn’t mean they didn’t start somewhere else.
    This is so true - for all countries! 
  • My mum's considered the 23 & Me because her dad isn't her biological dad, so she's always wondered about that part of her life.

    So yes @ShesSoCold let us know what you can about it! :)

    @kimmiinthemitten how were your results? Did it say health related things also?
    You have to pay more for the health, I probably will since my mom's blindness is genetic and we don't know from where and her deafness could be too.  The best part of that, is you can add it on at any time so already I submitted my DNA I can still get the results later.

    Most of mine was expected - British (Dads surname), German (Paternal Grandmas surname), Scottish (maternal Grandpas surname).

    The parts that kind of surprised me was the Italian/Greek/Middle Eastern.  I always get asked if I'm Italian or Lebanese, so it really just backed up what most people think I look like I guess.

    H's the whitest white guy on the planet with his 50% Hungarian, 50% British Isles heritage so he said it was the most unanticipated thing he's ever done.


    Correct me if I'm wrong, but I thought the DNA tests really only tell you the area(s) of the world that have the most similar DNA to you.  Not necessarily that this is really where one's ancestry is from.

    Because it's possible to have DNA most similar to Area X, but your ancestry really hails more from Area Y.

    @TrixieJess, I haven't looked into it for a number of years.  Maybe it is better now.  But I heard bad reviews for the pet DNA tests.  At the time, even the sites themselves said that the more breeds your dog was made up of, the least likely the DNA test would be to work.  There were lots of stories of people sending in DNA for their purebred dog and getting back some completely off the wall, wacky result. 

    But I hear ya!  I would love to know what breeds my little pound baby is made up of.  She has the face and coloring of a Boston terrier.  But with medium length fur and a stockier body.

    LOL, I was referring to myself as a mutt :) My mother's family we can trace back 400 years, and we have a mix of Scottish, English, German, Danish, and Russian in there. My father's is a bit more of an enigma. He and I have distinctly, either Indigenous, or Asian features, and his birth family is from the Northern part of the country so there is a possibility with the English, French and German that he knows of, that there is Native or Asian in there as well. 

    Oh, that's hilarious!  Mutts are the best :).  Both people and dogs.

    That's amazing you all can trace your family back 400 years on your mom's side.

    I come from a long line of island people, lol.  We can trace our family back (mom's side) to the mid 1800's.  They came from the Azores before immigrating to Hawaii to work on the sugar plantations in the late 1800's.  My mom was born in HI.  We could probably go back further from the Azores records, but nobody speaks Portuguese anymore.  Per my grandma, Portuguese is what her parents spoke when they didn't want the kids to understand what they were saying, lol.

    My dad's side is a little sketchier.  His mom didn't know much about her heritage.  His dad's family immigrated from Germany in 1908. 

    It's pretty easy considering most of my family was from the same part of Canada for 200 of those years, and then they can trace the lineage back to England back from there through the States and whatnot. My Grandfather started doing our family tree way back and when he died, my aunt took over. I know that he travelled to Utah to consult the Mormon genealogies because they have some of the best records (or used to) of family histories especially of any families that settled in the Americas (including Canada). 
  • CMGragainCMGragain member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    edited February 2018
    If any of you ladies are interested in searching your family trees, I recommend Ancestry.com.  It is reasonably priced, but it can be addictive.  Before you start, you need to collect all the verbal information on your family from your older relatives.  Be prepared to learn that some of this won't be accurate.  When you have the basic three generations, you will be able to hook onto records like federal and state census records, birth certificates, death certificates, immigration records.
    This can be a very addictive hobby!  I trace my family back to the Emperor Charlemagne.  Hundreds of thousands of people can easily do this, especially with English or French ancestry.
    There is always a reason WHY people came to Canada/USA from other countries.  Usually avoiding wars, famines, persecution, ethnic cleansing - or, in one case in my family, a murder charge!  Also, there were immigrants who thought they would get rich in America.  My Danish grandfather had hopes of this.  Didn't happen, but three generations later, most of his grandchildren have college educations and good jobs.  Back in Denmark, they were hungry.
    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
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