Dear Prudence,
Six years ago, I ghosted my mom. She’s a monster—I remember her trying to persuade my dad to kill himself. After he left, she made us children pray that our father would get killed on duty because the life insurance would be a “blessing.” She tried to have my older brother institutionalized by claiming he tried to murder me in my sleep with a knife. When I turned 15, she lied to doctors to try to get me diagnosed with a specific life-threatening illness. When I went to college, she cashed my financial aid checks by forging my signature, calling it “payback” for my childhood expenses. She’s taken out credit cards in my grandparents’ names and has preyed upon them to gain control of their estates. Somehow, she always manages to get away with her schemes. It’s been six years since I last spoke to her. I now live across the country and have a wonderful life with a successful job and beloved spouse. We just found out that we’re expecting twins. While I’m excited to start my family, I’m equally terrified that my mother will find out and demand to re-enter my life.
She has no other grandchildren to speak of and no remaining relationships with her children. She would also love the attention that comes from having twin grandchildren. The thought of her holding my babies makes me want to throw up. I also know she will take one look at my financially stable life and start to scheme. How can I protect my family? She has never been arrested, sued, or proven to be guilty of any wrongdoing. On paper, she looks like a model citizen. She excels at manipulating others into believing she’s a wonderful human. Is it possible to keep her from her grandchildren if she demands it?
—Afraid of Ghostly Visits