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Wedding Woes
VarunaTT
member
(I know y'all are) Are the hetero ladies okay?
in Wedding Woes
I busted up laughing when I saw this and Twitter is hilariously bashing this:
"I've barely left the house in lockdown. No wonder my wife looks strained."
"I mean, I can't speak for anyone else, but we've all been at home for 5 months now and I haven't had a single poo. Disaster could ensue if the man who watched me produce two children and nurse them knew that sometimes I poo."
"Those women must've exploded during lockdown. Rip. -- Have they been added to the COVID death tally?"
Also, i don't particularly enjoy pooping in public, no, but if I need to go, I do so. K and I tend to announce b/c with one bathroom, we make sure the other doesn't have to pee first.
"I've barely left the house in lockdown. No wonder my wife looks strained."
"I mean, I can't speak for anyone else, but we've all been at home for 5 months now and I haven't had a single poo. Disaster could ensue if the man who watched me produce two children and nurse them knew that sometimes I poo."
"Those women must've exploded during lockdown. Rip. -- Have they been added to the COVID death tally?"
Also, i don't particularly enjoy pooping in public, no, but if I need to go, I do so. K and I tend to announce b/c with one bathroom, we make sure the other doesn't have to pee first.
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Re: (I know y'all are) Are the hetero ladies okay?
Same with gas stations. Those are a crap shoot. Some of them never have public restrooms. Some of them normally do, but don't right now. And then some of them do, but those are few and far between.
Grocery stores and Walmarts have been my new "when you gotta go" spot. But those are fewer and farther between, so I have to start planning sooner, lol.
I'm not above using public restrooms, but prefer to make it home if that is possible. TMI. The dire emergency for me would be pooing in a public restroom. I rarely do that. Not pooing with my b/f in the house. That's a fair statement when I was first dating someone. But once we are staying overnight at each other's house on the reg, to try and maintain that would be ridiculous.
NEWSFLASH: there's no one thing 'all women' do. There's no sisterhood of the twats.
On a personal level, there's no mystery around these parts. I prefer NOT shitting in public, but if you gotta go, you gotta go.
We all poop DH. Some of us just don't have trips to the bathroom that are longer than naps.
But DH says things sometimes that really make me question his upbringing. Like I am not entirely sure he "knows for a fact" that girls fart. He mentions it kind of like a kid on the cusp of believing in Santa. Like he knows logically that they do but .... ?
We have two bathrooms and generally he uses the downstairs and I use upstairs but there is nothing that would make me not poop at my own house.
DH and I warn each other to avoid a bathroom if it's bad.
And secondly, DefConn has now taken to ribbing DH over his 'pooping time' and how he takes forever. It's hilarious. Kid's got jokes.
I think some of the dudes in the family just need more time. I can't explain it but for them it seems to be a more holistic experience.
Believe me, he knows I poop.
And I have farted in front of him. Multiple times. Because when I accidentally eat gluten, all bets and attempts at "mystery" are off.