MONDAY

mrsconn23 · April 2021

kvruns said:

@mrsconn23 what a mess for your friend! Does the STBX have a claim to the house even though it is just in her name, like it is a marrital asset or is it 100% hers through a prenup and he's just refusing to vacate

It's a marital asset because she bought it during the marriage. He's refusing to move out, let her get it appraised, do any of the work he told the judge he'd do, and on and on. Her mortgage company won't do anything unless he signs off on it because they're in the middle of divorce proceedings and even though it's in her name only, she has to get an order from a judge to circumvent him. He's told her that he won't move out until so ordered. He has a house that he had before they were married. I'm not a 100% on the situation with it, but it's been acknowledged by the court that he has an alternate residence that he could inhabit.

He doesn't have a job (he is a trained skilled tradesperson). Swore in court he couldn't seek work because of his health condition (asthma? but he smokes pot all the time) and was afraid of COVID. He hasn't gotten a vaccination yet. Told her he wouldn't get one until they have one for the variants, but I think he's scheduled an appt to be vaccinated Refuses to let the kids go to in person school and has them terrified to even hug their fully vaxxed grandparents.

I've read the order and the judge told him to basically get his shit together and become independent. He has not done any of that. I fucking hate him so much.

She's got a lot going for her because she's done all she's been told to, but her fate is in the hands of the court since he refuses to acknowledge any settlement. The good thing is she can report all this back and forth (and refusal to deal) to the court since it wasn't done in mediation (apparently anything negotiated or presented during mediation can't be brought before the judge...IDK why).

CharmedPam · April 2021

Yikes @mrsconn23, how long have they been married if you don’t mind me asking?

My friend is going through a divorce and while her ex is also a skilled tradesman - he wont look for a job. He’s getting paid more on unemployment than he did while working. Maybe that’s your friends’ stbx’s real reason?

Yay for pasing @short+sassy, but I see how you want to buy some more time. Quite literally.

mrsconn23 · April 2021

They've been married over 10 years. And he's not bringing in ANY income and has refused to work full time for a few years. He was supposed to be doing his own thing independently, but didn't do anything he was supposed to (like becoming licensed and bonded or whatever). She leased him a truck and since he wasn't working, she turned it back in. He tried to file under the original CARES act to get unemployment on the grounds of the pandemic, but his income from 2019 was so low that he was rejected. If it wasn't so infuriating to see someone I love so much being fucked over by this guy, I would some of this funny (like how in the eff did he think he was going to get paid from the CARES act when he couldn't prove he was unemployed because of of COVID?!)

CharmedPam · April 2021

mrsconn23 said:

They've been married over 10 years. And he's not bringing in ANY income and has refused to work full time for a few years. He was supposed to be doing his own thing independently, but didn't do anything he was supposed to (like becoming licensed and bonded or whatever). She leased him a truck and since he wasn't working, she turned it back in. He tried to file under the original CARES act to get unemployment on the grounds of the pandemic, but his income from 2019 was so low that he was rejected. If it wasn't so infuriating to see someone I love so much being fucked over by this guy, I would some of this funny (like how in the eff did he think he was going to get paid from the CARES act when he couldn't prove he was unemployed because of of COVID?!)

Gotcha. I hate seeing this happen to the innocent party in all these situations.

mrsconn23 · April 2021

CharmedPam said:

mrsconn23 said:

They've been married over 10 years. And he's not bringing in ANY income and has refused to work full time for a few years. He was supposed to be doing his own thing independently, but didn't do anything he was supposed to (like becoming licensed and bonded or whatever). She leased him a truck and since he wasn't working, she turned it back in. He tried to file under the original CARES act to get unemployment on the grounds of the pandemic, but his income from 2019 was so low that he was rejected. If it wasn't so infuriating to see someone I love so much being fucked over by this guy, I would some of this funny (like how in the eff did he think he was going to get paid from the CARES act when he couldn't prove he was unemployed because of of COVID?!)

Gotcha. I hate seeing this happen to the innocent party in all these situations.

Oh for sure. And she's not a saint or anything, but his fuckery is just beyond what anyone should have to deal with and it's such a toxic situation that feels never-ending to her because he just won't go unless he's sent kicking and screaming with the sheriff's outside. I do have some concerns about her physical safety, but I'd hope he wouldn't be that stupid since so many people know on some level what a piece of shit he is. And I'd turn over my message history with her in a heartbeat. It's extensive and very raw.

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