Dear Prudence,
I am married to a lovely, kind, and funny man. Our marriage is wonderful—we both just gel when it comes to most things life throws at us. However, he’s the type who likes to fall asleep snuggling, and I can’t fall asleep if I’m being touched. Plus I feel terrible when I have to disentangle myself from a snuggle, so we sleep on our own sides of the bed. My husband does often cuddle our small dog, and she’s usually very happy to sleep in any number of ways that would be very uncomfortable for me. But there are often times when she doesn’t want to snuggle, and my husband will hold her in place. If she does wiggle away, he’ll move her right back. I’ve explained that she might need to scratch herself or stretch out, or just wants to sleep on her own corner of the bed, but she doesn’t get free until he’s totally asleep. I feel bad for the dog and guilty that I let him violate her bodily autonomy like this! Should I insist he let her sleep as she sees fit?
—Give the Dog Her Space