Dear Prudence,
My best friend, “Jane,” and I (both 25-year-old women) had a falling out recently. I really miss her and want to get back in touch, but everyone I know says not to. Jane and I were extremely close for most of our early 20s. She’s the only person I’ve ever really clicked with, who liked all of the same weird things I do, and shared so many of my values and goals. We’d regularly crash at my apartment that was bigger and closer to both of our jobs, and when I moved cities for a new job, she came up to visit me multiple times.
Around the same time I moved, Jane started law school. About a year in, she just stopped talking to me. I reached out a few times to make sure we were all good, and she reassured me that there wasn’t anything I’d done, but she wasn’t being an active participant in our friendship. I got frustrated and ended up blocking her on social media because I was tired of seeing her post there and not reply to me (something I tried to communicate about, but she wasn’t replying to me). To complicate things, around the same time Jane stopped talking to me, she also came out. She’s known I was queer for years, and in retrospect, I think she might have had a crush on me. I wish I would have said something, because she’s exactly the kind of person I’d love to date, but honestly right now I miss her so much I’d just be happy to be friends! On the one hand, I think I deserve better friends than someone who could ghost me this easily. On the other hand, it’s been over a year since the last time I heard from her and I still miss her so much it hurts. Help?
— Call Her Maybe?