Wedding Woes

Tuesday

My tattoo on Friday ran late, so I didn't get to see Snake Eyes.  But I looooooooooooove my new tattoo:



IDK why I can't ever size photos on this website right.  It did hurt, I did have to concentrate and breathe through a few spots.  There was another group, mom and 2 adult daughters, getting a family tattoo.  The first daughter had no tattoos and she muscled through it like a champ, but she didn't like it.

Worked this weekend for the first time in years.  The job is easy and it's decent money.  Plus, I've already put in for 3 weekends off and no pushback given.  I think they just need good reliable people.  Management all already knows my  name, b/c again...easy job and I already post higher numbers than other people?  I also like that I don't really have to talk to anyone.  I downloaded some podcasts and just listened to those while doing the job and that's nice too.

Sunday night I lost my danged left contact.  I took it out and I had no idea where it went.  I had to put in an old contact on Monday morning.  I had a headache by 1:30, trying to read the computer.  The  doctor couldn't be me in until Friday morning.  I had no idea what I was going to do.  So, went home, carefully cleaned off bathroom counter, moved things, shook things, then swept and hallelujah, found it.  Still keeping the appointment b/c 2 sets of new contacts are on the list for moving.  I have specialized eye care, so I'll have to research providers when I get to CA.

Otherwise, SSDD.  Just grinding away at work.  My attitude has improved with knowing I have a plan forward and when it gets hard, I just look at the countdown.  
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Re: Tuesday

  • I'm here and recovering from the busy 80th Birthday weekend for my Mom.  It went really well and Mom loved it.   My sister came from out of state on Friday and left yesterday about noon.  

    Work is SSDD.  Co-worker jumped on me for something yesterday.  Something that was discussed and decided at a meeting they were at last week.  They are never happy unless it's their show all the time.  Their review is today - going to be pretty unhappy after that!

    We got over 3" of rain this weekend.  Fortunately, it was dry when we had to be out.  Hot and humid today with a heat advisory.  But it's supposed to be in 70's with low humidity this weekend - bring it on!
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  • MyNameIsNotMyNameIsNot member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    edited August 2021
    The tattoo turned out so good!

    SSDD here. It's hot, humid and gross. I'm really looking forward to the first part of autumn. I'm thinking about trying to plan a big trip in February. H has a milestone b-day and we haven't really been anywhere in a minute. Being hot and gross I'm thinking snow, but by February we'll be dying for a beach. So I'm distracted at work looking at resorts. I don't know what I'm going to do when my next project ramps up and I'm actually busy again.
  • DefConn and I had dental appts. this morning.  I have a seal coming off a cavity and DefConn has one cavity, so we're both going back next week for fillings.  They also say he's gonna need braces in a few years.  Ughh.  LOL 

    DH is wound tight due to work BS and the hiring processes he's in.  He's trying really hard not to be too extra, but he's definitely out of sorts. 

    I tried to start writing my speech/eulogy for mom's memorial last night.  I ripped up 4...5 pieces of paper.  So that's going swimmingly, LOL. DH said he'll help. He's a really good public speaker, and has done a couple eulogies himself, so hopefully he'll be able to help me focus and write something good.  

    SSDD otherwise. 
  • @VarunaTT, congrats on the new tattoo!  I'm also glad your p/t job is going well.

    I have to vent about one of my friends.  She asked me for advice about a real estate deal she is thinking about.  Outside of owning her own duplex and renting out the downstairs unit, she doesn't have any other real estate investment (REI) experience.  She's previously worked as a house painter (interior) and can do drywall repair.  She seems to have good, basic handyperson skills.  But that's the extent of her construction experience.

    I fell into the "trap" of giving her real advice, instead of telling her what she wanted to hear!  She wants to get into tax sales and has some silent, financial partners.  They have zero REI experience.  Nothing wrong with any of that, but no/little experience=proceed very cautiously.  The problem with a tax sale is you can't see the inside or have an inspection done, ahead of time.  She currently has her heart set on a particular property that is boarded up, so she can't even peek in the windows.

    The biggest takeaway I tried to give her is to be 100% on the numbers, to properly analyze the deal.  The purchase price.  The renovation costs.  The after repair value (ARV).  Holding costs.  The expected profit, on sale.  The tax implications of those net proceeds...which recently changed under the US tax code.

    Seems like basic and obvious advice to me.  For any business endeavor.  But she brushed all of that aside because she is so positive about her numbers.  She's assuming it won't be more than $100K for the renovations, which is what she thinks it would cost to renovate it, if it needs to be gutted (worse case scenario).  I told her, no, it could actually be double that, especially with the high price of materials right now.  That she should estimate $75/square foot for a gut job.  Then she actually had the audacity to act like that was a crazy high number.  She thought it was way too high overall, but also that "I'm not keeping in mind that she is gong to be DIY'ing most of the renovation".

    Oh, okay, yeah.  Never mind that I'm the one who has actually fixed up seriously dilapidated properties.  Multiple times.  So maybe, just maybe, she should at least think about what I'm saying.  OMG, $100K is a number she pulled out of thin air.  She's never even sat down and written out a scope of work and specific costs for what she will probably need to replace. 

    I had already picked up that I dare not question her about her utter lack of experience in DIY'ing in what will probably be a gut job.  So I pointed out the "time" problem with DIY.  Time is of the essence with a flip.  She does contract-type work that is often out-of-state.  She's has tons of time when she is in-between contracts.  But, when she isn't, she makes way more money than the labor she would be saving and also works 10-14 hour days.  Talking about "time" did seem to make an impression on her.  Along with some other pieces of advise I gave her. 

    There were some other red flags also.  And it's not even that I'm trying to discourage her!  I love real estate and have done really well with it.  But it's high stakes and can be risky.  You have to be a realist and conservative financially.  You can't go in all "puppies and rainbows", expecting everything to work out the way you expect and make an easy $80K.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • Ugh banana. I’m so sorry. My staff is freaking out about the mandate (60% of them have refused the vaccine) and I’m so over it. 


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  • Euology writing is difficult for sure @mrsconn23.  Maybe google for inspiration? Get a “start”?
    @banana468 ugh! So annoying.  Does DH have to get tested now?
    @levioosa fx for FI.  

    The more I sit here, hearing her sniffle and talk, the more pissed I get. it’s just common knowledge to not come into the office even if it is a cold.  I want to see her doctorate that verifies she knows that her sniffles are coming from the vaccine shot and not a cold and/or covid. Because I don’t know what a doctor is doing working here? 

  • levioosa said:
    Ugh banana. I’m so sorry. My staff is freaking out about the mandate (60% of them have refused the vaccine) and I’m so over it. 
    And you work in healthcare, right?  I am flabbergasted at the amount of healthcare people I know of that are just anti-vaccine.  DH's cousin is a nurse manager at an assisted living home and her entire family caught Covid, and she's ALL over FB with her refusing vaccines and masks. 

    A local schoolboard meeting has gone viral and made the national news because they invited a quack-ass 'doctor' to come speak and basically denounce masks, vaccines, and was dancing right on the edge of Covid denial.  

    Our schoolboard is having a special session Monday to discuss mask reinstatement.  I have a letter template that a friend gave to me, so I'm gearing up to send some e-mails.  
  • levioosa said:
    Ugh banana. I’m so sorry. My staff is freaking out about the mandate (60% of them have refused the vaccine) and I’m so over it. 
    Maybe, just maybe, if they didn't want to be vaccinated then they shouldn't have gone into healthcare? 

    Not directed at you @levioosa but I'm over the "You used to love us last year when we worked hard to save you and now that we have to be vaccinated you want to force away personal choices."  

    No - I want you to be vaccinated so when you're in the livelihood of healthcare that you aren't going to get me or my unvaccinated children sick.  And if following public health recommendations is more than you want to do then DO NOT WORK WITH THE PUBLIC. 

    My really small violin is broken. 
  • Exactly @banana468.   People in healthcare had a front row seat to the pandemic.  Many doctors and nurses saw their floors turned into Covid units.  At the very least, your entire process was upended and how you do your job day-to-day was affected by Covid.  

    So yes, we people NOT in healthcare are completely mind-bottled that you're all mad about being mandated to take a vaccine that has been proven to keep people from needing your care and showing up to your clinic or hospital.   It's almost like you're undoing ALL the goodwill we had for you because you're taking an anti-science stance when you should be at the top of the list for knowing better. 

    (we's and you's are the general we and you ;)
  • I will fight anyone who gives healthcare workers a bad rap after the last year and a half. I had people take amazing care of me and the baby when we were terrified of being in a hospital (pre-vaccine) last year. They were probably terrified of us. 

    That I said - they’re all on their own if they’re refusing a vaccine. You’re putting so many people at risk with that stance and you have no business putting people in *more* danger. 
  • I am crossing everything the approval comes in the next month or at least EUA for the under 12 set.  DefConn is beyond ready to get vaccinated.  He asked if we could lie about his age, since he's "almost 11 anyway."  LOL 
  • mrsconn23 said:
    I am crossing everything the approval comes in the next month or at least EUA for the under 12 set.  DefConn is beyond ready to get vaccinated.  He asked if we could lie about his age, since he's "almost 11 anyway."  LOL 
    I wish everyone had that kind of enthusiasm!  My nephew will be 12 in Oct. and he's also looking forward to getting his.

    With any luck, they'll have vaccines for kids 5-11 late this year or early next year, like they are expecting.  And under 5 following shortly after.

    @STARMOON44, big phew on your BFF's passport!  Just in the nick of time.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker

  • I somewhat disagree with this only that we also have a group of public institutions that are dedicated to public health.  However we also have a group of keyboard warriors (as noted above) who are believing conspiracy theorists who are (and were) unfortunately elected officials over scientists.  

    We have a terrible medical system that favors those who also live well in a capitalistic society and who punishes those who are at the poverty level.  Totally agree. 

    BUT we have far too many people who have great medical care  and easy access to it who are refusing to follow the public health recommendations.     
  • Yes, I agree with all of that too @banana468.

    also I read this today.  A bit drastic imo.. but may help the vaccination rate:
    https://www.upworthy.com/employers-could-tax-employees-who-arent-vaccinated

    i mean, it’s from upworthy so not very reliable….


  • Well, looks like I won’t be getting much PT after all. I just got a notification that my insurance won’t cover anything. So I’m on the hook for $80 today, and then $70 each time after that. I can’t afford $840 a month in physical therapy. Man this country is bullshit. And I supposedly have “good insurance.” Looks like I’ll be going twice and then trying to manage my pt at home. 


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  • ei34ei34 member
    Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Yes, I agree with all of that too @banana468.

    also I read this today.  A bit drastic imo.. but may help the vaccination rate:
    https://www.upworthy.com/employers-could-tax-employees-who-arent-vaccinated

    i mean, it’s from upworthy so not very reliable….

    I don’t think it’s drastic.  People too ignorant to vaccinate barely deserve their jobs.  I mean, don’t lay them off, that’s a whole ‘nother crisis, but they’re creating such a public health dumpster fire 
  • CharmedPamCharmedPam member
    Tenth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    edited August 2021
    levioosa said:
    Well, looks like I won’t be getting much PT after all. I just got a notification that my insurance won’t cover anything. So I’m on the hook for $80 today, and then $70 each time after that. I can’t afford $840 a month in physical therapy. Man this country is bullshit. And I supposedly have “good insurance.” Looks like I’ll be going twice and then trying to manage my pt at home. 
    Yes.  I had good insurance years ago on ex’s plan, but even as I was leaving him I started to notice the plan go downhill.  I don’t think even the best of companies can afford really good plans anymore, unfortunately.  

  • ei34 said:
    Yes, I agree with all of that too @banana468.

    also I read this today.  A bit drastic imo.. but may help the vaccination rate:
    https://www.upworthy.com/employers-could-tax-employees-who-arent-vaccinated

    i mean, it’s from upworthy so not very reliable….

    I don’t think it’s drastic.  People too ignorant to vaccinate barely deserve their jobs.  I mean, don’t lay them off, that’s a whole ‘nother crisis, but they’re creating such a public health dumpster fire 
    DH and I have been talking about this.  I've been waiting for the actuarial studies to come out AND for the vaccine(s) to get full FDA approval in adults.   When that happens, my thought was that employers would add additional tiers to their health insurance
    -Smoker/Vaccinated
    -Smoker/Unvaccinated
    -Nonsmoker/Vaccinated
    -Nonsmoker/Unvaccinated

    If your lack of vaccination costs your company in both productivity AND additional healthcare costs I am not seeing a way around that.    It already sucks working in US manufacturing and when an employee is out for a few days in a critical field that we face production delays.  Those can play into increased costs of overtime and air freight that quickly add up to thousands of dollars per day.  Add more employees, and a virus that spreads and that employee's "personal decision" to go unvaccinated has kept them and others out and the company now has to pay for OT, additional PTO, additional insurance and hospitalization costs (as many absorb portions of deductibles) and I can't see how they won't push it. 

    IMO, this is why the first step is for major companies like Disney and hospitals around the nation to simply require that their employees be vaccinated or face disciplinary action. 


  • levioosa said:
    I have huge issues with doctors and nursing staff who are against the vaccine. You are educated, you have been part of this for over a year. If you can’t understand the science and data, then you have zero business being in healthcare and making decisions about people’s lives and you can get the fuck out. For the rest of my staff, who are mostly minorities, young, and mainly uneducated, I can understand even though I am incredibly frustrated. I just can’t combat the misinformation and (justifiable) fear. And at some point I just don’t know what else can happen to make them want it. They’ve lost family members, some of them have gotten very sick. I’ve tried to present them with facts and data. But apparently tik tok is a better source of information and I’m so bitter about it. I can already tell my pandemic fatigue, which was already bad before at the peaks, is going to reach new levels. We don’t have to live like this. People don’t have to keep dying. You all are being so goddamn selfish and I don’t know how to explain to you how to care about other people’s lives. This is a public health issue. You can’t drink and drive. You can’t run around in food service with Hep A. This isn’t any fucking different. I’m going to start ranting and not be able to stop. 
    I'm right there with you and my daughter (a PA) feels the same way. She's so frustrated with healthcare workers that won't vaccinate. Healthcare workers that are so up in arms about it - don't they have to get a flu vaccine every year? I know I did when I was working in a hospital.

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