What day is it- Tuesday.

missJeanLouise · December 2021

I literally had to check when writing the title.

charlotte989875 · December 2021

Literally have no idea. Stayed up to watch the Bills lose last night which was a huge bummer. Busy day at work but it’s lightly snowing and I’m loving it.

missJeanLouise · December 2021

I am in nesting mode I guess. We aren't making a nursery for this poor second child but I am turning our storage room into a workout room in hopes that our treadmill might get some use. That means clearing everything out and finding new homes for everything. Which is <temporarily> the guest room, but organized.

DH's company didn't handle his time off from the trip this summer correctly so he requested the rest of the year off, just to see what would happen. Well, it was approved today so FX it doesn't backfire once they figure out their mistake.

Also today, it was announced that government employees are moving to a 4.5 day work week. 8 hours Monday- Thursday and half days on Fridays. Currently the work week is Sunday - Thursday so this is a shift to a more European standard weekend but since Friday is the Holy Day there is no way they would work on Fridays. School schedules are also changing so that means it will change for everyone. I think it's great.

DS is doing great with his potty training. The first couple days were rough but I think he is getting it now.

Casadena · December 2021

I told H last night that it felt like Thursday already...so i'm a little pissed that today isn't Friday. We are in major purge mode right now and i'm loving it. We are both sick of our house never feeling clean/organized bc things just seem to move around and it's never all done at the same time. I think it means we have too much stuff!

I saw a bunch of interesting jobs posted yesterday so i'm going to apply for some tomorrow when i'm WFH. I also am putting together some things to talk to my boss about with regard to my current job - sometimes he is almost too hands off and especially after 2 leaves in 18 months and no child care during the pandemic i'm feeling really disconnected from my work. I'd really like his help prioritizing and maybe setting some deadlines for model updates and generally just have a little more input from him. I think that would help me a lot!

MIL is being annoying (surprise, surprise) and pressuring us about holidays - it really bugs me. We are spending Christmas Eve with them and doing the family holiday, but want to be home on Christmas morning since it's the first time G will actually be excited about it. But she wants us to come back to their house again on Christmas day after we our own family thing in the morning (which is just super inconvenient - an hour away and the timing would really mess with kiddos napping/sleep). IDK why that bugs me, but I'd really like her to respect that fact that the 4 of us are also our own family and would like some time together. And she's just really passive aggressive about it.

@missJeanLouise I feel you on the 2nd kid nursery. We put the crib and a small chair in our guest room and that's about it. The boys will share a room as soon as N is old enough for a big boy bed!

MNNEBride · December 2021

We have beautiful light snow here too. I'm hoping to finish decorating on my lunch and get the totes stored away. DH wants a Christmas list - I'm stumped. I just really don't need anything. I bought him an air fryer he mentioned but could use a couple of small things.

I'm getting a tooth for Christmas! I'm having a crown placed after about 18 months of work on this tooth. I can't wait!

CharmedPam · December 2021

Sounds great @missJeanLouise. So Friday’s are like our Sunday’s here? How is working 1/2 a day on that day accepted then? Just confused. I hope H gets the rest of the year off!

i needed last night to do nothing, with the vacation hours catching up to me. Now, today I feel so refreshed and back to normal. Just behind on my house chores and workouts though.

I haven’t seen my soon to be boss in about a month, but she came in yesterday and was like “something’s changed with you... You’re glowing! … new hair? Facial?” I was like: “Hmmm nope. I haven’t changed anything up” (well since she last saw me, my extensions were put back in…maybe it was that? Or I started to use a rocesea cream so my face is less red lol…then she goes “wait, are you dating someone?”
how did she know?!? I thought it was the procacea.

missJeanLouise · December 2021

@Casadena I have been doing the whole "organize by category rather room" thing since we were just moving things from room to room. So aggravating. Plus when DH actually sees a pile of camping supplies it is easier to get him to edit them down.

Don't go to your MIL's on Christmas Day. You are already doing X-mas Eve, she can come to you if she really wants to spend Christmas together.

@MNNEBride massage gift card? Guitar lessons? Monthly flower subscription? Donation to charity? Theatre tickets?

banana468 · December 2021

@Casadena would you open the door to MIL and instead say, "Oh we're going to have Christmas in our home so you're welcome to stop by."

I have mixed feelings about the sharing of the holidays and it has always been important to me to see our parents over the course of that time. Last year was the first time I didn't see my parents but a dad w/ health issues and the pandemic struck.

We know that MIL and FIL are aging and they live in town so they're often at our place. This year they're headed to BIL's because he stated years ago that "their kids will wake up in their home for Christmas Day," as an absolute. And while I *get* that he's allowed to say it to his parents he lives far away from them so there is going to come a time that their ability to travel far is going to stop and BIL will need to figure it out.

Today I'm off. Kids were vaccinated last night and Chiquita seems tired but I sent her to school. She can go to bed early but she got up and started to move so I'm going to put this as an early to bed night for both. Friday I get boosted and my fingers are crossed.

I'm now needing to do ALLL the laundry.

mrsconn23 · December 2021

DH *finally* has the offer in hand from old company. Wahoo!! I'm hoping he's back at work next week. I hope this helps ease all his stress.

We also watched the Bills lose. We have bye this weekend and then the Pats come here on the 18th. If we lose that, I think we are too far down the hole to see a playoff spot. I also think I lost both my fantasy matchups this week. Ugh.

My day off is tomorrow and DH and I are going to do some major Christmas shopping. I need to make a list of what we still need to buy and for whom.

A co-worker (older, MAGA person) had a lot of (wrong) things to say in a meeting yesterday about vaccines and apparently there was some 'summit' here over the weekend with quack doctors about the Covid of it all. I had to go to page 2 on google to find info on this 'summit'. It was very uncomfortable. My boss did a great job navigating it. I hate zoom because I'm terrible and keeping a neutral face. I was sending tin foil hat gifs to my work besties.

Also, they released our vaccine and testing requirements for work that are effective next month. They will pay for testing through the 1st quarter and then you're on your own. But I am curious what kind of pushback they're going to get from people who WAH permanently. We'll have to see.

DefConn gets shot 2 next week and I get boosted.

SSDD. Blerg, Tuesday.

missJeanLouise · December 2021

@mrsconn23 I have been watching Marcella on Netflix. It is a dark, British, detective show and I really enjoy it. Have you seen it?

short+sassy · December 2021

@charlotte989875, sorry about your Bills! My H and I watched the first 3 episodes of Only Murders in the Building last night. We both really liked it.

My H was so upset yesterday. He called me shortly before I left work to tell me they still had not found the clean-out thing that the Sewerage and Water board needs to fix their collapsed sewer pipes. He was actually choking back tears he was that upset and frustrated. He is not a guy who cries, so it really hit me. I get it. They spent a few hours on both Sat. and Sun. Then ALL DAY yesterday. And for all that work to be for nothing is demoralizing. They finally found that stupid clean-out thing this morning within about an hour of them starting.

But on a much brighter side, I got AMAZING news yesterday! I received an e-mail from the government agency dealing with rent/landlord assistance for my area. My application was accepted and I will be receiving the full rent from March-October of this year for that one deadbeat tenant I go stuck with for most of this year. The agency will be paying me sometime over the next 21 days.

I already filed a small claims case against that tenant months ago, but they weren't able to serve her. As soon as her rent is settled by this program, I am going to have her skip traced, so I can continue with my lawsuit for a lesser amount. Because this program only covered her rent. Not her damages. Just the physical damages were $2355. She had a $1200 security deposit, so she still owes us $1155.

I'm sure I'll never see a dime of that, if I'm even able to serve her at all and have my day in court. But, mainly, I am hugely thankful that I'll at least be getting the rent money. Because, by far, that was the biggest chunk of money she owed me.

charlotte989875 · December 2021

We’re struggling with the holidays too- my MIL insists on hosting thanksgiving because it’s the only time SIL comes into town so she’s very flexible on Christmas. In turn we encourage my Mom to choose what she wants to do. But she cannot chose so everyone gets frustrated.

I love that we’re finally back in Buffalo and close enough to see everyone but hate the running around to see everyone on the same day.

charlotte989875 · December 2021

So glad you like it @short+sassy! I’m almost done with the first season already!

charlotte989875 · December 2021

So @mrsconn23 will your office require folks to be in the office to be vaccinated/ regular testing? We don’t have our vaccination plan out yet because I think the company was relying on the federal mandate as cover for requiring vaccines.

MissKittyDanger · December 2021

I'm not sure why, but I've been following the Josh Duggar stuff .... not through a reliable source, just through https://www.thehollywoodgossip.com/ lol
Why? No clue. It's fascinated me. They aren't doing super details like a court reporter, but still.

Anyways .... BK is back at preschool. She was just so off yesterday, that we realized when she's on winter break we're going to have to adjust her bedtime/naps. She had energy to burn still that she started doing laps in her room before bed - we let her.

I got my can sorter and why does this feel like a game changer for my pantry?
Why does organization make me feel like I have my shit together when it's literally just one small area lmao

Whatever. BK helped me put it together.
BK: what doing?
Me: making something
BK: what doing?
Me: .... making something for the pantry.
*8 seconds later*
BK: Mama .... what doing?
Me: M can you just help her out of the booster? BK you can come help.
BK: Ok mama, I help! *runs across room* What doing?
*face palm*

Casadena · December 2021

@banana468 @missJeanLouise Good suggestion to have MIL come to us maybe on Christmas day. We never don't want to see them around the holidays, she is just so inflexible and territorial about the ACTUAL holiday. H and I have said from the beginning of our marriage that we are going to take every holiday individually and not do strict rotations or alternating. It often ends up that way, but we just dont want to set the expectation.

It's also such a stark contrast to my parents attitude about it that it sets me off more than it should. My parents could care less when we celebrate. We will do it when it's convenient and it will be great, if it happens to be the "real' holiday day then cool. If it's a week later, cool.

Casadena · December 2021

@short+sassy
I'm so glad for you about the rent assistance and finally finding the sewer thing!~

ILoveBeachMusic · December 2021

I have a dentist appointment this afternoon followed by a massage. I will probably be done at the dentist with time to spare so I need to decide if I'll come home for a few minutes are try to kill some time shopping.

Re holidays. I don't care if my family is together on the exact day as long as we can get together. It is hard though because DS1 and DIL aren't good at making plans in advance while DD has to plan in advance since she rotates holidays and weekends at the hospital. I get the need to want to spend Christmas with just your(general) family, but I was never one of those. I wanted to spend Christmas with my Mom but H put his foot down after a particularly nerve wracking trip south - we were 10-12 hours from our families. DD wants to spend holidays with us because she says she missed being around family as a child (this is how I felt too). Everyone has their own feelings about the best way to do things. We alternated the actual day until that awful travel year.

MyNameIsNot · December 2021

I'm also disappointed that today isn't Friday. Doubly so because this is my last 5 day work week of the year. H got boosted yesterday and is feeling fine, so I'm taking that as a good sign. I put mine off until next week when I have a random vacation day.

In really fun news, the crew came out and did the last of the touch-ups on the bathroom this morning, so it's done! I'm so happy! Couple of before/after pics spoilered below; I have no idea how I nested all these spoilers.

.

MissKittyDanger · December 2021

@MyNameIsNot OMG I LOVE YOUR BATHROOM

mrsconn23 · December 2021

missJeanLouise said:

@mrsconn23 I have been watching Marcella on Netflix. It is a dark, British, detective show and I really enjoy it. Have you seen it?

I have not. I'll look for it.

mrsconn23 · December 2021

charlotte989875 said:

So @mrsconn23 will your office require folks to be in the office to be vaccinated/ regular testing? We don’t have our vaccination plan out yet because I think the company was relying on the federal mandate as cover for requiring vaccines.

Yep. They said 'all' employees. So it didn't differentiate between permanent remote and people who go to the office. But you can be asked to go into the office at any time or if you have an equipment issue, you do have to take your stuff to IT if it can't be resolved remotely. Also, my company has a lot of events in the spring and summer that all employees can attend. So it will be interesting to see if there are any addendums.

NBSquared2017 · December 2021

What an odd day.

I had a very interesting conversation with one of my friends today. I just found out that her and her husband are in an open marriage. No shame, but it’s just not for us. When she asked me how I felt about it and if I judged them I said no, you do you.

Apparently she thinks that I am now judging her? I literally said you do you. She then proceeds to tell me that there are lots of people who have open marriages that are successful.

I told her it sounded like she was trying to convince herself instead of convince me. Now she’s mad.

charlotte989875 · December 2021

mrsconn23 said:

charlotte989875 said:

So @mrsconn23 will your office require folks to be in the office to be vaccinated/ regular testing? We don’t have our vaccination plan out yet because I think the company was relying on the federal mandate as cover for requiring vaccines.

Yep. They said 'all' employees. So it didn't differentiate between permanent remote and people who go to the office. But you can be asked to go into the office at any time or if you have an equipment issue, you do have to take your stuff to IT if it can't be resolved remotely. Also, my company has a lot of events in the spring and summer that all employees can attend. So it will be interesting to see if there are any addendums.

That’s so interesting. Initially my company thought requiring vaccinations in order to come in was going to incentivize people (I.e you have to WFH if you’re not vaccinated) until they realized that was seen as rewarding not getting vaccinated and that people don’t actually want to go back in the office. So now we’re waiting updated guidance. We’re supposed to return in January but 1) there’s a ton of backlash against that and 2) our case numbers are super high right now. So who knows

short+sassy · December 2021

charlotte989875 said:

That’s so interesting. Initially my company thought requiring vaccinations in order to come in was going to incentivize people (I.e you have to WFH if you’re not vaccinated) until they realized that was seen as rewarding not getting vaccinated and that people don’t actually want to go back in the office. So now we’re waiting updated guidance. We’re supposed to return in January but 1) there’s a ton of backlash against that and 2) our case numbers are super high right now. So who knows

That's hilarious! I normally not the kind of person who would lie to my employer, but I definitely would have been, "Vaccinated? What? Nooooo. I'm not vaccinated."

@MyNameIsNot, your all's new bathroom is gorgeous! I love the larger window above the soaker tub.

MissKittyDanger · December 2021

NBSquared2017 said:

What an odd day.

I had a very interesting conversation with one of my friends today. I just found out that her and her husband are in an open marriage. No shame, but it’s just not for us. When she asked me how I felt about it and if I judged them I said no, you do you.

Apparently she thinks that I am now judging her? I literally said you do you. She then proceeds to tell me that there are lots of people who have open marriages that are successful.

I told her it sounded like she was trying to convince herself instead of convince me. Now she’s mad.

I think people in open marriages automatically get defensive about it.
I found out a girl I know is in one. I don't judge but I did have questions {ie; have they always been open since getting married a year ago? Etc}

It's not for me either, but I understood her reasoning {she offered why they are} but I totally get it - people assume others will judge or assume wrong things.

VarunaTT · December 2021

Just now undigging from a massive 2 day project. The boss that the project is for has decided to play fuck around and find out.

Basically, I have more cases than I have actual hours to work in a month. And my caseload is built by design with difficult cases, difficult clients, and advanced level work. So I don't really have a case that I can only touch for one hour and have it flowing smoothly. Anyway, he's decided to start cc'ing my "manager" (we don't have a managing paralegal) on whatever nonsense thing he's decided he's irritated about today.

So...she's getting cc'd on my emails to him about this tasks I assigned him specifically at his request, to "help Varuna out" and still hasn't done. From a month ago. I think the reason he's pushing so hard is b/c he knows that I can do my work without being micromanaged, so I'm his best hope for end of year bonus. However, he also knows I don't give one.effin.damn about HIS bonus (a fact I have expressed to him before b/c it's fucking rude he even brings it up in front of paralegals) AND that I'm working as hard/fast/best as I can after a year of above and beyond stress and work at this place, so IDK why he's losing his damn mind.

Otherwise, SSDD. Just trying to figure out some days/things.

banana468 · December 2021

MissKittyDanger said:

NBSquared2017 said:

What an odd day.

I had a very interesting conversation with one of my friends today. I just found out that her and her husband are in an open marriage. No shame, but it’s just not for us. When she asked me how I felt about it and if I judged them I said no, you do you.

Apparently she thinks that I am now judging her? I literally said you do you. She then proceeds to tell me that there are lots of people who have open marriages that are successful.

I told her it sounded like she was trying to convince herself instead of convince me. Now she’s mad.

I think people in open marriages automatically get defensive about it.
I found out a girl I know is in one. I don't judge but I did have questions {ie; have they always been open since getting married a year ago? Etc}

It's not for me either, but I understood her reasoning {she offered why they are} but I totally get it - people assume others will judge or assume wrong things.

I'll admit that my experience is limited but those I know that are embracing their open marriage aren't defensive about it. Friends of DH and me are poly and I've yet to see any defensive comments about it.

MissKittyDanger · December 2021

banana468 said:

MissKittyDanger said:

NBSquared2017 said:

What an odd day.

I had a very interesting conversation with one of my friends today. I just found out that her and her husband are in an open marriage. No shame, but it’s just not for us. When she asked me how I felt about it and if I judged them I said no, you do you.

Apparently she thinks that I am now judging her? I literally said you do you. She then proceeds to tell me that there are lots of people who have open marriages that are successful.

I told her it sounded like she was trying to convince herself instead of convince me. Now she’s mad.

I think people in open marriages automatically get defensive about it.
I found out a girl I know is in one. I don't judge but I did have questions {ie; have they always been open since getting married a year ago? Etc}

It's not for me either, but I understood her reasoning {she offered why they are} but I totally get it - people assume others will judge or assume wrong things.

I'll admit that my experience is limited but those I know that are embracing their open marriage aren't defensive about it. Friends of DH and me are poly and I've yet to see any defensive comments about it.

Oh? Idk of anyone poly in person {that I'm aware of} but I know a few open marriages and they're defensive about it.

I don't think anyone should have to explain their reasoning for why their relationship is the way it is - do people ask why other are monogamous? No.

MyNameIsNot · December 2021

MissKittyDanger said:

banana468 said:

MissKittyDanger said:

NBSquared2017 said:

What an odd day.

I had a very interesting conversation with one of my friends today. I just found out that her and her husband are in an open marriage. No shame, but it’s just not for us. When she asked me how I felt about it and if I judged them I said no, you do you.

Apparently she thinks that I am now judging her? I literally said you do you. She then proceeds to tell me that there are lots of people who have open marriages that are successful.

I told her it sounded like she was trying to convince herself instead of convince me. Now she’s mad.

I think people in open marriages automatically get defensive about it.
I found out a girl I know is in one. I don't judge but I did have questions {ie; have they always been open since getting married a year ago? Etc}

It's not for me either, but I understood her reasoning {she offered why they are} but I totally get it - people assume others will judge or assume wrong things.

I'll admit that my experience is limited but those I know that are embracing their open marriage aren't defensive about it. Friends of DH and me are poly and I've yet to see any defensive comments about it.

Oh? Idk of anyone poly in person {that I'm aware of} but I know a few open marriages and they're defensive about it.

I don't think anyone should have to explain their reasoning for why their relationship is the way it is - do people ask why other are monogamous? No.

That's really an unfair sweeping generalization to say that the few people you know who is in open relationships are defensive, so they all must be defensive.

MyNameIsNot · December 2021

short+sassy said:

charlotte989875 said:

That’s so interesting. Initially my company thought requiring vaccinations in order to come in was going to incentivize people (I.e you have to WFH if you’re not vaccinated) until they realized that was seen as rewarding not getting vaccinated and that people don’t actually want to go back in the office. So now we’re waiting updated guidance. We’re supposed to return in January but 1) there’s a ton of backlash against that and 2) our case numbers are super high right now. So who knows

That's hilarious! I normally not the kind of person who would lie to my employer, but I definitely would have been, "Vaccinated? What? Nooooo. I'm not vaccinated."

H and I had the same conversation about his job in the summer. His HR sent out an optional poll about vaccination plans. The rumors were flying that they'd make you come back if you were vaccinated, so no one wanted to answer.

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