Wedding Woes

Tuesday, Tuesday, full of rage.

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Re: Tuesday, Tuesday, full of rage.

  • I have no issue with people being pro-life for themselves.  I'm pretty sure I wouldn't term a pregnancy that DH and I created together.  We'd deal with it.  

    I keep coming back to a scenario where I do end up pregnant now.  I'd be high risk because of my age, mostly, but other factors too.  What if something happens where the only cure is terminating my pregnancy and it can't be done because it's the law that was written by a non-scientist or doctor with no understanding of how any of it works.  DH would likely end up with a dead wife and baby. 

    Your ability to be pro-life ends at the end of your fingertips otherwise you're imposing your will on someone else.  That's the fundamental issue with 'pro-life', the desire to have power over.  It's deadly either because you are forcing people into the shadows or you're killing people needlessly because you hamstring the ability of medical providers to provide healthcare to people.  Or shit, a person is in an abusive relationship and could get out if they have an abortion and not be tied to their abuser for life. FFS, there's absolutely NO concessions for rape or incest.  Babies will be having their rapists or molester's babies.  

    I will always be pro-choice because I do not believe I have the right to tell anyone else what to do with their body.  I don't know their life and what leads them to any decision they make.  And no one should have that power over me. 
  • I'm so fucking angry. SO ANGRY. I don't even have the words. Even worse, this is something my mom and I had a huge fight over back when she was voting for Trump. And she's stopping by my house today (she's staying outside and we're not coming in close contact since I'm still sick) and it's going to take everything I have to not bring this up. I'm so incredibly mad at her because she's the typical white female boomer who took advantage of Roe v. Wade (she had an abortion before she had me, right after my parents got married) and now just doesn't give a fuck about any of the women that come after her. You had access to safe abortions in your 20s and 30s and now that you're a senior citizen, you don't care for any other women to have access to it. 

    It's all I can think about today. 
    I don’t understand this thinking.  On Rowe or anything really. Your brother has a baby boy right? Is he done having kids? What if your mom has a granddaughter? Wouldn’t she want that child to have a choice?

  • I'm so fucking angry. SO ANGRY. I don't even have the words. Even worse, this is something my mom and I had a huge fight over back when she was voting for Trump. And she's stopping by my house today (she's staying outside and we're not coming in close contact since I'm still sick) and it's going to take everything I have to not bring this up. I'm so incredibly mad at her because she's the typical white female boomer who took advantage of Roe v. Wade (she had an abortion before she had me, right after my parents got married) and now just doesn't give a fuck about any of the women that come after her. You had access to safe abortions in your 20s and 30s and now that you're a senior citizen, you don't care for any other women to have access to it. 

    It's all I can think about today. 
    I don’t understand this thinking.  On Rowe or anything really. Your brother has a baby boy right? Is he done having kids? What if your mom has a granddaughter? Wouldn’t she want that child to have a choice?
    I don't get it either. But people that have pretzeled logic always think their decision was OK for them, but they got theirs and fuck everyone else or something.  Or they've internalized shame so deep that they have to atone by being vehemently against it. 

    Also since it's tied to politics and politics = money,  then being for anything "liberal" means they're threatening their bottom line. I mean, that's what faux news tells them.  
  • I'm so fucking angry. SO ANGRY. I don't even have the words. Even worse, this is something my mom and I had a huge fight over back when she was voting for Trump. And she's stopping by my house today (she's staying outside and we're not coming in close contact since I'm still sick) and it's going to take everything I have to not bring this up. I'm so incredibly mad at her because she's the typical white female boomer who took advantage of Roe v. Wade (she had an abortion before she had me, right after my parents got married) and now just doesn't give a fuck about any of the women that come after her. You had access to safe abortions in your 20s and 30s and now that you're a senior citizen, you don't care for any other women to have access to it. 

    It's all I can think about today. 
    I don’t understand this thinking.  On Rowe or anything really. Your brother has a baby boy right? Is he done having kids? What if your mom has a granddaughter? Wouldn’t she want that child to have a choice?
    I truly don't get it either and I thought about bringing exactly this up to her. She'll probably have some ridiculous answer about just going to another state for it or something equally as out of touch. 
  • mrsconn23 said:
    I'm so fucking angry. SO ANGRY. I don't even have the words. Even worse, this is something my mom and I had a huge fight over back when she was voting for Trump. And she's stopping by my house today (she's staying outside and we're not coming in close contact since I'm still sick) and it's going to take everything I have to not bring this up. I'm so incredibly mad at her because she's the typical white female boomer who took advantage of Roe v. Wade (she had an abortion before she had me, right after my parents got married) and now just doesn't give a fuck about any of the women that come after her. You had access to safe abortions in your 20s and 30s and now that you're a senior citizen, you don't care for any other women to have access to it. 

    It's all I can think about today. 
    I don’t understand this thinking.  On Rowe or anything really. Your brother has a baby boy right? Is he done having kids? What if your mom has a granddaughter? Wouldn’t she want that child to have a choice?
    I don't get it either. But people that have pretzeled logic always think their decision was OK for them, but they got theirs and fuck everyone else or something.  Or they've internalized shame so deep that they have to atone by being vehemently against it. 

    Also since it's tied to politics and politics = money,  then being for anything "liberal" means they're threatening their bottom line. I mean, that's what faux news tells them.  
    I had an older friend (post menopause) about 10 years ago.  She was uber conservative, both religiously and politically.  We occasionally had civilized debates about political issues, but mostly didn't talk about it.  But then she started picketing in front of doctor's offices that performed abortions.

    Which was additionally a bit side-eye because she'd been on disability since her late 30s.  So, you're too disabled to work, but can stand and walk for 4 hours at a time?  Okay.

    We were having lunch and she was talking about her latest picketing.  I gave my shot at the opposing view.  That women should have choices about their own body.  That if a fetus isn't developed enough to live outside of someone's body, a woman shouldn't be "forced" to host it.  The many challenges women face, if they are forced to carry a baby they don't want.

    She concedes my point about the challenges, though still doesn't agree.  On the "challenges", she then tells me about the abortion she had in her 20s.  On how disastrous it would have been if she had kept the baby, so she understands why some women want to have an abortion, but thinks it's wrong.  You could have knocked me over with a feather!

    I asked her if she regrets the abortion.  Is that why she is so fervent about this issue (she didn't seem emotional about it).  She said something like, "Yes. I guess. But it's really just as well because my life would have been so much harder."

    Me (stating the obvious):  Don't you think other women, some of whom are in as bad or a worse position than you were, have that same choice then?

    She went back to stating the party line that "it's a life, so it shouldn't be ended".

    Our friendship had been waning anyway and I stepped back more after she started picketing and that conversation.  It's one thing to be pro-life.  But it's quite another to picket in front of a doctor's office.  
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  • I know this is off the subject, but It’s kinda how I feel about leaving my carbon footprint.  I didn’t have any children, so I’m not leaving the “Earth the way it is” for my kids or anything but I will be leaving the earth for the next generation and my nieces and nephews will have to deal with it.
    Am I the most environmentally friendly person? Hells no.  I won’t say that I am. But I try my best to not leave a carbon footprint when I can. For them.

  • Shit, the next season of Slow Burn is Roe v. Wade.  They just dropped the trailer today. 
  • I forgot to tell you all one of my all-time favorite jokes yesterday.  Probably because now the subject isn't funny, sigh.  It's also old and harkens back to the days after Katrina:

    Question:  What is George W. Bush's stance on Roe vs. Wade?


    Answer:  Nothing.  He didn't care how people got out of New Orleans.

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  • kerbohlkerbohl member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its First Answer
    I don't get it either.  I am happy to live in Canada, but if things start stirring in the States people could start getting loud here.
    The thing I don't get is, I'm in agreement in that I would like to see less abortions happen.  I really, genuinely would.  But the way I would like to see them stop happening is to have less unwanted pregnancies.  So birth control that is widely available regardless of economic status, proper sexual education (looking at you abstinence only), addressing the bias in medicine (having more studies into women's health issues including better birth control), and addressing violence against women (which has no easy answer there but obviously does contribute to unwanted pregnancies).  And until these issues are being seriously combated, abortion has to be legal and easily accessible. 

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