Wednesday

CharmedPam · October 2022

I just put a refill in for my ozempic, and it’s on delay for being “out of stock”. Which reminded me about Friday. I went to dinner with my friend that night. She’s TINY and always has been. Said she gained like 15-20 pounds and it could be premenopausal and went to her doctor for it. He prescribed her ozempic for weight loss! She’s not obese. She’s 15 pounds overweight, at best. But it wasn’t covered (as it shouldn’t be, because she doesn’t have diabetes - unless her upcoming blood work came back that she suddenly does?) so she got trulicity instead. When I told her a lot of diabetics weren’t getting their meds because of this sudden popularity of it, she laughed. Yeah. She thought it was funny. She’s my “friend” I’m trying to avoid, but she owed me money and couldn’t figure out zelle. I avoid her for reasons like that.

SSDD. Our office is doing trivia tonight. Woop. Woop.

charlotte989875 · October 2022

Wow @CharmedPam with friends like those…

Things are fine here. Not great, not terrible. H and I had a thing- Sunday he was talking about how he wants to go on more trips like the one was just on, do more outdoors stuff, etc. and asks what I want. Well a few months ago we had a tough talk- I want another baby, he doesn’t. So it was tough bringing it up again. He doesn’t want another baby, doesn’t want to talk about it, and we’re just not on the same page. It’s tough.

Casadena · October 2022

Ugh, pam how shitty.

That's so hard @charlotte989875, I hope you guys can settle in a good place soon. Baby talk is very rough.

MissKittyDanger · October 2022

@CharmedPam jeez friends like those but honest wtf dr?

@charlotte989875 is it because baby M is too little still? Does he have a reason?

M would love another kid but we're done. I've been done for awhile but we agreed to wait until BK was 5 before making decisions - but I've started talking to my dr, and regardless if M gets snipped or I do, likely wouldn't happen until BK is 5
I had a rough pregnancy and shitty postpardum and I told M I'd rather BK have a happy mom, than a sibling.

charlotte989875 · October 2022

MissKittyDanger said:

@CharmedPam jeez friends like those but honest wtf dr?

@charlotte989875 is it because baby M is too little still? Does he have a reason?

M would love another kid but we're done. I've been done for awhile but we agreed to wait until BK was 5 before making decisions - but I've started talking to my dr, and regardless if M gets snipped or I do, likely wouldn't happen until BK is 5
I had a rough pregnancy and shitty postpardum and I told M I'd rather BK have a happy mom, than a sibling.

He says he’s happy with M, that he likes things how they are, and that he wants to do more of the things that he likes. I’m 37, we don’t have a ton of time to wait to figure it out either.

banana468 · October 2022

charlotte989875 said:

MissKittyDanger said:

@CharmedPam jeez friends like those but honest wtf dr?

@charlotte989875 is it because baby M is too little still? Does he have a reason?

M would love another kid but we're done. I've been done for awhile but we agreed to wait until BK was 5 before making decisions - but I've started talking to my dr, and regardless if M gets snipped or I do, likely wouldn't happen until BK is 5
I had a rough pregnancy and shitty postpardum and I told M I'd rather BK have a happy mom, than a sibling.

He says he’s happy with M, that he likes things how they are, and that he wants to do more of the things that he likes. I’m 37, we don’t have a ton of time to wait to figure it out either.

The hard part sounds like...he wants you to be home more? I do "get" the concept of wanting to do more things but is he actively saying he wants you to pick up the slack or is he saying that he's wanting to do more of the adult things and he knows he'd be a hands-on dad if there was another baby and that's why he's not wanting one?

charlotte989875 · October 2022

banana468 said:

charlotte989875 said:

MissKittyDanger said:

@CharmedPam jeez friends like those but honest wtf dr?

@charlotte989875 is it because baby M is too little still? Does he have a reason?

M would love another kid but we're done. I've been done for awhile but we agreed to wait until BK was 5 before making decisions - but I've started talking to my dr, and regardless if M gets snipped or I do, likely wouldn't happen until BK is 5
I had a rough pregnancy and shitty postpardum and I told M I'd rather BK have a happy mom, than a sibling.

He says he’s happy with M, that he likes things how they are, and that he wants to do more of the things that he likes. I’m 37, we don’t have a ton of time to wait to figure it out either.

The hard part sounds like...he wants you to be home more? I do "get" the concept of wanting to do more things but is he actively saying he wants you to pick up the slack or is he saying that he's wanting to do more of the adult things and he knows he'd be a hands-on dad if there was another baby and that's why he's not wanting one?

I feel it’s the later- he loves M, is super hands on, equally engaged & caring for him as I am- so I think he’s feeling like doing it all over again will delay him getting to do more adult things that he wants to do.

banana468 · October 2022

charlotte989875 said:

banana468 said:

charlotte989875 said:

MissKittyDanger said:

@CharmedPam jeez friends like those but honest wtf dr?

@charlotte989875 is it because baby M is too little still? Does he have a reason?

M would love another kid but we're done. I've been done for awhile but we agreed to wait until BK was 5 before making decisions - but I've started talking to my dr, and regardless if M gets snipped or I do, likely wouldn't happen until BK is 5
I had a rough pregnancy and shitty postpardum and I told M I'd rather BK have a happy mom, than a sibling.

He says he’s happy with M, that he likes things how they are, and that he wants to do more of the things that he likes. I’m 37, we don’t have a ton of time to wait to figure it out either.

The hard part sounds like...he wants you to be home more? I do "get" the concept of wanting to do more things but is he actively saying he wants you to pick up the slack or is he saying that he's wanting to do more of the adult things and he knows he'd be a hands-on dad if there was another baby and that's why he's not wanting one?

I feel it’s the later- he loves M, is super hands on, equally engaged & caring for him as I am- so I think he’s feeling like doing it all over again will delay him getting to do more adult things that he wants to do.

Got it. So you're in a position of being unhappy without a change and he doesn't want a change and would likely be unhappy. Hugs. It's hard and I really see both sides. Neither of us have made any final changes to our health but I'm happy with our two and am actively telling DH when I'm fertile and he needs to stay away.

charlotte989875 · October 2022

banana468 said:

charlotte989875 said:

banana468 said:

charlotte989875 said:

MissKittyDanger said:

@CharmedPam jeez friends like those but honest wtf dr?

@charlotte989875 is it because baby M is too little still? Does he have a reason?

M would love another kid but we're done. I've been done for awhile but we agreed to wait until BK was 5 before making decisions - but I've started talking to my dr, and regardless if M gets snipped or I do, likely wouldn't happen until BK is 5
I had a rough pregnancy and shitty postpardum and I told M I'd rather BK have a happy mom, than a sibling.

He says he’s happy with M, that he likes things how they are, and that he wants to do more of the things that he likes. I’m 37, we don’t have a ton of time to wait to figure it out either.

The hard part sounds like...he wants you to be home more? I do "get" the concept of wanting to do more things but is he actively saying he wants you to pick up the slack or is he saying that he's wanting to do more of the adult things and he knows he'd be a hands-on dad if there was another baby and that's why he's not wanting one?

I feel it’s the later- he loves M, is super hands on, equally engaged & caring for him as I am- so I think he’s feeling like doing it all over again will delay him getting to do more adult things that he wants to do.

Got it. So you're in a position of being unhappy without a change and he doesn't want a change and would likely be unhappy. Hugs. It's hard and I really see both sides. Neither of us have made any final changes to our health but I'm happy with our two and am actively telling DH when I'm fertile and he needs to stay away.

That’s exactly it. I see his side too, and I feel how I do- so it’s just tough. He’s not unreasonable for feeling how he does, but neither am I. So here we are.

MissKittyDanger · October 2022

So I started new meds my gyno prescribed to basically reset my cycle - she thinks that will help because other options wouldn't help that fully.
I'm curious what will happen because one side effects is nausea and good lord I'm prone to that or indigestion, so we'll see. I have a follow up in a month.

I finally got an update on my couches.
Next weekend is delivery

ei34 · October 2022

Ugh. Major thumbs down at your friend @CharmedPam
Oof. That's all hard @charlotte989875. Not my business but as a complete outsider it seems like your H does get a ton of hobby-time already, made more glaring by the fact that it often involves overnight trips. I'm very biased but I'm on team siblings-are-the-best (not even saying that as a mother of close kids, just as a lucky sister). So I hope you get your way (and I hate that I have to phrase it as "your way".) Your lines of communication seem wide open which is a really good thing.

Dealing with a weird headache (nowhere near AF time, which is my usual headache culprit) so counting down the minutes at work. I haven't been able to sleep past 4-4:10 the past few days (not an awful stretch, I'm usually up around 4:45) but I'm tired right now.

charlotte989875 · October 2022

ei34 said:

Ugh. Major thumbs down at your friend @CharmedPam
Oof. That's all hard @charlotte989875. Not my business but as a complete outsider it seems like your H does get a ton of hobby-time already, made more glaring by the fact that it often involves overnight trips. I'm very biased but I'm on team siblings-are-the-best (not even saying that as a mother of close kids, just as a lucky sister). So I hope you get your way (and I hate that I have to phrase it as "your way".) Your lines of communication seem wide open which is a really good thing.

Dealing with a weird headache (nowhere near AF time, which is my usual headache culprit) so counting down the minutes at work. I haven't been able to sleep past 4-4:10 the past few days (not an awful stretch, I'm usually up around 4:45) but I'm tired right now.

My therapist would 100% agree with you here!

I’m team siblings too; and I’m closer to mine than H is to his so wondering if there’s something to that as well. I just think of holidays, family vacations, etc- that M would be happier if he had a sibling there.

short+sassy · October 2022

@CharmedPam, I have no issue with people getting medications for alternative reasons, if their doctor thinks it's suitable. But not while there are shortages! Someone using Ozempic/Trulicity to help control their blood sugars is doing that to stay healthier, stay feeling well, and to try and stave off horrific complications happening later in life. Versus taking a medication to help lose 15lbs? Seriously? There is no comparison.

I hope she doesn't still owe you money. Especially since you just saw her in person. Because I assume she has figured out cash, lol.

@charlotte989875, I'm sorry to hear about the differences you have with your H about a second child. It's such a big decision that doesn't have a compromise.

I just had a weird call from my H. A couple just moved into our only single, family house about two weeks ago. They already want to move someone else in. It's one thing if this was 3 or 4 months from now or longer. But to be so soon, set off alarm bells with me. It sounds like someone who doesn't look good on an application, so they're trying to slide him in after they've secured the house.

We told them it's fine, but he still needs to submit a background check and it's the same requirements. No court-ordered evictions, no violent felonies within the last 10 years. They said they understood, it wouldn't be a problem, and gave my H the guy's e-mail address so I can have the third-party company send him the link. I guess we'll see.

At any rate, I hope it all works out. The couple doesn't have any children and it's a fairly large house for just the two of them (4 bed/2 bath). I think a roommate is a great idea for them, it's just the timing of the request that makes me nervous about this person.

-----------------

More Prime Day chit-chat. I want another "work" cardigan. That would be the cardigan I leave at my cube all the time for when it is freezing here or I use as a pillow when I have a lunch nap.

Basic cardigan. I felt like my needs were few, but apparently I was wrong. I couldn't find anything in all of Amazon. Sweater material/look, but NOT ACRYLIC, because that is scratchy and sent by the Devil. Roomy and hits somewhere between hips and knees (not shorter or longer). Size 2X/3X. Less than $35.

95% of the cardigan sweaters on Amazon that came up for my search were acrylic. Ugh! Why? And the ones that weren't had something else that didn't meet my criteria.

But I did score on the other two clothing items I was looking for. Fleece lined leggings and plain sweaters. The sweaters were normally $30 and on sale for $20. 100% cotton. I wear sweaters like that all the time, both for work and errands. I went wild and bought them in 5 different colors, lol. Now if only that company would make cardigans, lol.

I've also been looking for a decent price on one of those "ultra" coolers, that will keep ice frozen for a few days. The famous company is Yeti and their coolers were on sale, but still $325. Then I found a Coleman one with tons of great reviews, half off for $40! It won't keep ice as long lasting as the Yeti ones but for 90% less, I'm good with that, lol. Most of the reviews said it would keep ice frozen for about 3 days and things refrigerated for about 5 days.

Casadena · October 2022

@short+sassy would you link the cotton sweaters?

CharmedPam · October 2022

short+sassy said:

@CharmedPam, I have no issue with people getting medications for alternative reasons, if their doctor thinks it's suitable. But not while there are shortages! Someone using Ozempic/Trulicity to help control their blood sugars is doing that to stay healthier, stay feeling well, and to try and stave off horrific complications happening later in life. Versus taking a medication to help lose 15lbs? Seriously? There is no comparison.

I hope she doesn't still owe you money. Especially since you just saw her in person.

My issue is, we just starting using the semaglutide as a weight loss drug - so what are the long term side effects of using a drug that lowers blood sugar levels when your blood sugar levels are ok?
plus, at $1,000 a pen, and the demand going up, the cost will go up (I mean this will happen anyway because of where we’re at in the economy but say that wasn’t going on).

no, we’re even steven now! I won’t have to see her for awhile

VarunaTT · October 2022

If I don't find my motivation at work soon, I'm going to be causing myself problems. I just can't seem to find my love for my work anymore. I used to really like my job and now I just seem to be blah about everything. And my allergies are all over the danged place.

Walgreens finally got their crap together and got one of my nosesprays in. I also have been soaking my ear in a small capful of peroxide at night and I finally decided to adult up and use my nasil saline solution neti pot thing. It wasn't as terrible as I thought. My ear feels a lot better today, not much pain, but still super stuffed up and hard to hear out of.

I shot off a "white lady" letter to the convention I'm doing social media for. I made a post for indigenous peoples' day, with a link from a well known nerd media source to a kickass indigenous woman who is a popular cosplayer. Massive engagement, very successful. The cishet white man president sent my friend G to talk to me about "being political'. I went ahead and drew a line in the sand and said, "I've already had incredible success for this convention, this is how my work will be, this post isn't political (FFS), and if this is a problem now, I can step down, let me know by this date". Also, G is a black man, so while I wasn't upset about anything in the situation, more bemused, sending a black man who I consider to be one of my inner circle friends of 20+ years to tell a queer woman that she's being political, is NOT sitting right with me at all.

I also finally built my entertainment system, which led to me reorganizing my entire main living room. Which then led to me buying 2 new chairs and a new rug, which will finish my main living room and let me set up my 2nd living room. I'm seriously considering painting my entertainment system and end tables. They're all dark wood finish and it's so boring.

The new chairs:
Open photo

which will take the place of the couch on the left. Then I can put the little table between them. I'm thinking of painting the entertainment system and tables dark blue with an orange interior. Also the chairs are velvet, I'm so excited.

Then, the new rug is the same as that rug, but round. The couch on the left will come over, with a blue chair that I have and my old coffee table, which will host my reading and listening to music nook as well as just another seating/chatting area. I would really like to start hosting something small, fun, and social for myself and my friends. I miss being social, but all of my social-ness is truly wrapped together with alcohol and I'm pushing that out of my life.

I think I told y'all that I bought a gaming system as well, so that I can start playing computer games again. Something fun, sans alcohol, and not "producing". So basically, I'm pretty ready for winter to come on in and make me hibernate.

short+sassy · October 2022

Casadena said:

@short+sassy would you link the cotton sweaters?

Amazon.com: Amazon Essentials Women's Fisherman Cable Long-Sleeve Crewneck Sweater (Available in Plus Size), Camel Heather, XX-Large : Clothing, Shoes & Jewelry

banana468 · October 2022

Yeah, @charlotte989875 I know more people who were only children who didn't love that they were only children and actively wanted more kids.

And I do agree it sounds like your H already has it "good" but I get that he's likely pushing back because right now he sees that there's a likely "light at the end of the tunnel" that goes away when there's a new baby.

VarunaTT · October 2022

I'll throw my hat in the ring: I am an only child. I dislike it for myriad of reasons, but honestly the main one is that once my parents pass, I won't have anyone in my life who has known me my whole life any more. I won't have a lot of people who have my face and share my stories. There's a shared history that siblings have, for better or worse, that always exists, even when they're not close. I know that I romanticize having a sibling, but so many of my friends are close to their siblings and I can still get jealous. Also in all of this stuff with my dad, it would've been nice to been able to somehow share the burden and the continuing changes. exH had wanted a kid but he wanted one and done. I said if we had 1 we had 2. I'm glad we had 0, to be honest, but I felt strongly enough about it I was willing to try whatever necessary to carry 2 successful pregnancies.

ETA: exH was 1 of 3 if that matters. And I don't judge anyone for 1 and done. Children are always personal decisions between parents, no one else.

short+sassy · October 2022

VarunaTT said:

I also finally built my entertainment system, which led to me reorganizing my entire main living room. Which then led to me buying 2 new chairs and a new rug, which will finish my main living room and let me set up my 2nd living room. I'm seriously considering painting my entertainment system and end tables. They're all dark wood finish and it's so boring.

The new chairs:

which will take the place of the couch on the left. Then I can put the little table between them. I'm thinking of painting the entertainment system and tables dark blue with an orange interior. Also the chairs are velvet, I'm so excited.

Then, the new rug is the same as that rug, but round. The couch on the left will come over, with a blue chair that I have and my old coffee table, which will host my reading and listening to music nook as well as just another seating/chatting area. I would really like to start hosting something small, fun, and social for myself and my friends. I miss being social, but all of my social-ness is truly wrapped together with alcohol and I'm pushing that out of my life.

I think I told y'all that I bought a gaming system as well, so that I can start playing computer games again. Something fun, sans alcohol, and not "producing". So basically, I'm pretty ready for winter to come on in and make me hibernate.

I remember when you got that rug. It's so cute and fun! I love the colors in it. I'm glad to hear your getting the same one, just a different shape.

I think painting the entertainment center the way you described, would look especially great with the colors in the rug and the orange-hued furniture.

banana468 · October 2022

VarunaTT said:

I'll throw my hat in the ring: I am an only child. I dislike it for myriad of reasons, but honestly the main one is that once my parents pass, I won't have anyone in my life who has known me my whole life any more. I won't have a lot of people who have my face and share my stories. There's a shared history that siblings have, for better or worse, that always exists, even when they're not close. I know that I romanticize having a sibling, but so many of my friends are close to their siblings and I can still get jealous. Also in all of this stuff with my dad, it would've been nice to been able to somehow share the burden and the continuing changes. exH had wanted a kid but he wanted one and done. I said if we had 1 we had 2. I'm glad we had 0, to be honest, but I felt strongly enough about it I was willing to try whatever necessary to carry 2 successful pregnancies.

ETA: exH was 1 of 3 if that matters. And I don't judge anyone for 1 and done. Children are always personal decisions between parents, no one else.

I was definitely in the camp of at least 2. Having the two was a bigger mental toll on me than I anticipated and I actually feel like I'm more equipped now to handle another and at the same time question if I'd feel the same being 61 at a HS graduation. Either way, once I had Chiquita it wasn't a question of if but when we'd have a second assuming there were no issues conceiving and carrying to term.

MissKittyDanger · October 2022

VarunaTT said:

I'll throw my hat in the ring: I am an only child. I dislike it for myriad of reasons, but honestly the main one is that once my parents pass, I won't have anyone in my life who has known me my whole life any more. I won't have a lot of people who have my face and share my stories. There's a shared history that siblings have, for better or worse, that always exists, even when they're not close. I know that I romanticize having a sibling, but so many of my friends are close to their siblings and I can still get jealous. Also in all of this stuff with my dad, it would've been nice to been able to somehow share the burden and the continuing changes.

As an only child I get it, but also let me just clarify my aunt is now only one left because my dad passed away and then my nana.

With M & BIL I hope they become closer, otherwise if MIL passes, that's it. Some people only use their parents as connecting factor and drop sibling right away. I've seen it happen.

banana468 · October 2022

MissKittyDanger said:

VarunaTT said:

I'll throw my hat in the ring: I am an only child. I dislike it for myriad of reasons, but honestly the main one is that once my parents pass, I won't have anyone in my life who has known me my whole life any more. I won't have a lot of people who have my face and share my stories. There's a shared history that siblings have, for better or worse, that always exists, even when they're not close. I know that I romanticize having a sibling, but so many of my friends are close to their siblings and I can still get jealous. Also in all of this stuff with my dad, it would've been nice to been able to somehow share the burden and the continuing changes.

As an only child I get it, but also let me just clarify my aunt is now only one left because my dad passed away and then my nana.

With M & BIL I hope they become closer, otherwise if MIL passes, that's it. Some people only use their parents as connecting factor and drop sibling right away. I've seen it happen.

It definitely happens. There can be plenty of sibling rifts that happen.

But as I've aged I'm far more grateful for my brother and everyone I know that's an only child dealing with aging parents is really sad for how isolated they feel. I realize that you shouldn't advise people to 'have a kid so they're not alone when you die' but it is something that has an impact on people.

short+sassy · October 2022

VarunaTT said:

I'll throw my hat in the ring: I am an only child. I dislike it for myriad of reasons, but honestly the main one is that once my parents pass, I won't have anyone in my life who has known me my whole life any more. I won't have a lot of people who have my face and share my stories. There's a shared history that siblings have, for better or worse, that always exists, even when they're not close. I know that I romanticize having a sibling, but so many of my friends are close to their siblings and I can still get jealous. Also in all of this stuff with my dad, it would've been nice to been able to somehow share the burden and the continuing changes. exH had wanted a kid but he wanted one and done. I said if we had 1 we had 2. I'm glad we had 0, to be honest, but I felt strongly enough about it I was willing to try whatever necessary to carry 2 successful pregnancies.

ETA: exH was 1 of 3 if that matters. And I don't judge anyone for 1 and done. Children are always personal decisions between parents, no one else.

I've always wondered what I would be like today, if I had been an only child. I'm positive I would be a pretty different person in some ways, but I'm not sure exactly how or if me and/or my life would be better or worse. Or maybe neither, just different. I think I would have been more introverted so having a sibling made me more social. That's one "plus" I can point to.

I have one sister, younger than me by 4 years. We were friends and played a lot together as children, but we aren't very close as adults. No bad blood, we just aren't. We have shared stories but since we don't speak that often, we rarely talk about them.

Our father passed away when we were young adults. We've really never talked about that either. Not then, nor now. But our mother needed substantial emotional support at the time and we shared in that. I never thought about how it was easier for both of us to carry that weight together, in order to best help our mom.

On a lighter note, we do NOT have a similar face at all, lol. We look very different from each other. But it's fun that we took opposite traits from our parents. So we don't look like each other, but we both look like our parents.

That is a long story that boils down to I don't have much of an opinion, lol. I like having a sister, though I enjoyed it more when I was a child. I think I've had a better life and become a better person for having a sibling, but that's not by leaps and bounds either.

short+sassy · October 2022

MissKittyDanger said:

As an only child I get it, but also let me just clarify my aunt is now only one left because my dad passed away and then my nana.

With M & BIL I hope they become closer, otherwise if MIL passes, that's it. Some people only use their parents as connecting factor and drop sibling right away. I've seen it happen.

That's how my sister and I are. I enjoy seeing her and her family when I visit CA but, the rest of the time, we get updates on each other through our mom.

I'm not sure what will happen when our mom passes away. I'd like to hope we would be in direct, more frequent communication. But I suspect the reality is that it would be like that at first and then we'd slowly drift away from each other again and rarely talk.

kerbohl · October 2022

Hubby just up and decided recently after 8 years of marriage knowing that I never wanted kids that he wants kids. Started talking about getting a surrogate and having a kid alone. So I get the kid talk being hard. I'm still waiting for him to decide if he wants kids more than he wants me.

I do love my siblings. My oldest brother is a jerk, and my other brother is a needler, but my sister is fantastic. And much as I love to hate the brothers .... I do love them.

missJeanLouise · October 2022

Jumping in late:
I was the same as you @VarunaTT , if we have 1, we'll 2. Though I wasn't sure my marriage was going to last after the first year with DS, for various reasons. Luckily we made it through to have DD. I will be honest, going from the freedom of having a 3y to the constant, neediness of a baby is HARD. DD is a total sour patch kid too. She is so sweet but she also screams, at the top of her lungs, for no reason. We all have hearing damage. She also is not a great sleeper and I have 2 little teeth marks on my nipple right now from the little monster. I am counting the days until she is 3 and I have a little bit of freedom again. That being said, I am happy DS and DD have each other.

MissKittyDanger · October 2022

short+sassy said:

MissKittyDanger said:
As an only child I get it, but also let me just clarify my aunt is now only one left because my dad passed away and then my nana.

With M & BIL I hope they become closer, otherwise if MIL passes, that's it. Some people only use their parents as connecting factor and drop sibling right away. I've seen it happen.

That's how my sister and I are. I enjoy seeing her and her family when I visit CA but, the rest of the time, we get updates on each other through our mom.

I'm not sure what will happen when our mom passes away. I'd like to hope we would be in direct, more frequent communication. But I suspect the reality is that it would be like that at first and then we'd slowly drift away from each other again and rarely talk.

Had my dad not passed before my nana, we know we would have lost all contact with my aunt.
For various reasons I'm literally learning recently {not because hidden info, but was apparently never asked} my aunt dropped us from her life and accepted holidays.

It sucks regardless. Sibling or not.

charlotte989875 · October 2022

I appreciate you all so much! These are tough choices and I really appreciate you all sharing your experiences!

jfawkes · October 2022

Oh wow @kerbohl that's quite a bomb to drop on your marriage after that long! I'm so sorry you are going through that.

@charlotte989875 That's so tough! For what it's worth I think it's easier with a second child having the older sibling to play with. We get to just sit and watch them play together a lot when I feel like if you just have one it puts more on the adults to get on their level. When we go to playgrounds now me and H can sit and talk like a mini-date while the kids go play.

VarunaTT · October 2022

Oh, big hugs @kerbohl, I can't imagine the stress.

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