Thoughts on moissanite?

tmclawchick

I casually mentioned to a friend that I was looking at moissanite rings for my wedding band. I guess wedding planning has made me realize just how cheap I am ... I don't see the point in spending a ton of money on a diamond band when I could get something comparable for a fraction of the price, while putting the money I would have spent towards something fun or practical like a vacation/student loans, etc. Friend rolled her eyes and said she hates when people get fake diamonds because they're just posing. I was surprised by it but kept moving on with the conversation, but now I'm a little upset. Is this a big deal? Is there some sort of unwritten rule I'm unaware of? I guess if the poser shoe fits I'll wear it, but I really wasn't coming from that place... *kicks dirt*

krizzo17

It sounds like you have the right mindset for this. I think the problem is a lot of women buy moissanite to try to pass it off as a bigger diamond - but if you're buying it because it's 6 of 1, half a dozen of the other to you, and you'd rather pay less, then I say go for it. Just remember that you don't have to explain to everyone that your ring is moissanite - if someone says "what a lovely ring", you can just say "thank you". So many brides (ok, women in general) feel like they have to justify or explain everything.

Another thing to consider, if you don't care about the diamond itself, is a colored gemstone ring - this is becoming more popular, and you could save money and get something that's more unique!

s-aries8990

I think that if you get the ring because it's what you want, and you will be totally honest, then go for it. If you try and lie to people and say it's a diamond, then you have some bigger problems.

misssunshine17

You said wedding ring, but what is (if you have one) your engagement right? I'd be more worried that they don't match. Either way, at the end of the day, buy what you like and makes sense to you.

tmclawchick

krizzo17 said:

It sounds like you have the right mindset for this. I think the problem is a lot of women buy moissanite to try to pass it off as a bigger diamond - Right?? I didn't even really think of that until my friend mentioned it.. now I feel a little icky about it... but if you're buying it because it's 6 of 1, half a dozen of the other to you, and you'd rather pay less, then I say go for it. Just remember that you don't have to explain to everyone that your ring is moissanite - if someone says "what a lovely ring", you can just say "thank you". So many brides (ok, women in general) feel like they have to justify or explain everything.

Another thing to consider, if you don't care about the diamond itself, is a colored gemstone ring - this is becoming more popular, and you could save money and get something that's more unique!

I've considered this too! Our DS's birthstone is amethyst, so I was tossing around the idea of getting that, hmmm...

Also, totally didn't even think about them not matching ::head desk:: I'm a mess lol.. I have a diamond e-ring, so it'd likely look funky...thanks for bring that up @misssunshine17!

chibiyui

Is your engagement ring a diamond? My only concern would be over time they might not match, but I don't think thats a big issue with moissanite. The most important thing would be to get what you want and is also in your budget. 

Do you want a wedding band with stones in? It is possible to get plain bands, which can be a lot less expensive. And again, many colored gemstones are cheaper then diamonds. And also check out clearance bins! I know the store I work at has a bunch of wedding bands on clearance, so check your local department stores as well as jewelers for deals. Best of luck!

JCbride2015

Yes, I would be concerned that it might not match your diamond e-ring.  Second PP on getting a band without stones if you are worried about cost.  A delicate band in the same metal as your e-ring could be really pretty.

misssunshine17

Sounds like you're a great candidate for a regular, plain band. In my area, they were about $150-$200. 

HaileyDancingbear

Moissanite is NOT a "Fake Diamond."  It's a different mineral.  We don't call a blue topaz "Fake Sapphire,"  we don't call Garnet "Fake Ruby," because they're different stones entirely.  Moissanite is a gorgeous stone and is often brighter than a diamond- if you want a moissanite ring, go for it.  Anyone who gives you crap for not having a diamond is just a snob, and they should be ignored.  You're the one who will be wearing the ring, so all that matters is if YOU like it.  

krizzo17

HaileyDancingbear said:

Moissanite is NOT a "Fake Diamond."  It's a different mineral.  We don't call a blue topaz "Fake Sapphire,"  we don't call Garnet "Fake Ruby," because they're different stones entirely.  Moissanite is a gorgeous stone and is often brighter than a diamond- if you want a moissanite ring, go for it.  Anyone who gives you crap for not having a diamond is just a snob, and they should be ignored.  You're the one who will be wearing the ring, so all that matters is if YOU like it.  

 

It doesn't seem to have been the OPs intention, but many women buy moissanite and DO try to pass it off as a large, flawless diamond. When I worked at Sears about 7 or 8 years ago, we were encouraged to recommend moissanite to the women who wanted large rings but couldn't afford them. I think it was even advertised as brighter than diamonds at a fraction of the cost, or something like that.

 

And @tmclawchick- I like the idea of using your son's birthstone, but have you considered what you would do if you have another child?

KatWAG

HaileyDancingbear said:

Moissanite is NOT a "Fake Diamond."  It's a different mineral.  We don't call a blue topaz "Fake Sapphire,"  we don't call Garnet "Fake Ruby," because they're different stones entirely.  Moissanite is a gorgeous stone and is often brighter than a diamond- if you want a moissanite ring, go for it.  Anyone who gives you crap for not having a diamond is just a snob, and they should be ignored.  You're the one who will be wearing the ring, so all that matters is if YOU like it.  

I dont think Mosssiante is a fake diamond. but I also dont think they are in any way comparable to a diamond, like OP mentioned. I have seen a few people try to pass Moissante as a diamond and that really rubs me the wrong way.

 

Get whatever you like and can afford. But dont try to pass it off as something its not.

 

(stuck in box)

PrettyGirlLost

tmclawchick said:

I casually mentioned to a friend that I was looking at moissanite rings for my wedding band. I guess wedding planning has made me realize just how cheap I am ... I don't see the point in spending a ton of money on a diamond band when I could get something comparable for a fraction of the price, while putting the money I would have spent towards something fun or practical like a vacation/student loans, etc. Friend rolled her eyes and said she hates when people get fake diamonds because they're just posing. I was surprised by it but kept moving on with the conversation, but now I'm a little upset. Is this a big deal? Is there some sort of unwritten rule I'm unaware of? I guess if the poser shoe fits I'll wear it, but I really wasn't coming from that place... *kicks dirt*

Get whatever ring you want to wear and can comfortably afford.  Everyone has different tastes. I think your friend was being rude.

I love all shinies and I enjoy all the different rings ladies wear.

PrettyGirlLost

HaileyDancingbear said:

Moissanite is NOT a "Fake Diamond."  It's a different mineral.  We don't call a blue topaz "Fake Sapphire,"  we don't call Garnet "Fake Ruby," because they're different stones entirely.  Moissanite is a gorgeous stone and is often brighter than a diamond- if you want a moissanite ring, go for it.  Anyone who gives you crap for not having a diamond is just a snob, and they should be ignored.  You're the one who will be wearing the ring, so all that matters is if YOU like it.  

Preach!

smalfrie19

my .02 on the matter. I PROUDLY wear my aquamarine engagement ring. It was less than 4 figures and anyone who thinks that I should have had a diamond can go screw themselves. Buy what you WANT not what other people think you should have. If you want a Moissanite, get one if you want an amethyst get that. If you are like me and want an aqua then get it. Get what makes you and your partner happy.

FTR I get quite a few compliments on my e ring.

HisGirlFriday13

I have a cushion-cut sapphire centre stone, with a diamond halo and a half-eternity band, then a 3/4 eternity band wedding ring.

I wanted a sapphire for a lot of reasons -- DH's favourite colour is blue; sapphires were the traditional engagement stone before DeBeers created a false scarcity of diamonds in the 1920s in an effort to bump up their demand and therefore their price; it was really, really important to me to have conflict-free stones; I wanted something 'different'; etc. -- and it fits my personality. 

I've gotten a ton of compliments on it, even after being engaged for a year and now being married. I've had some people ask me if it's my birthstone (no -- I was born in August). I've had some people ask me if I did it because of Duchess Catherine (nope). But I've never had anyone be judgey about it.*

I think, if the ring reflects who you and your FI are as a couple, that's all that matters. If that's moissonite, then that's awesome. I don't believe in lying about stones -- I have a friend whose centre stone is a CZ and she claims it's a diamond -- because then I feel like you're ashamed of what your FI bought you, and if that's the case? You're a douche.

But I love, love, LOVE when people get alternative stones.

*I lied. As I was typing this out, I remembered that DH's BSC grandmother and crazy aunt BOTH told me, "Well, it doesn't look like an engagement ring." Well, who asked you?!

misssunshine17

HisGirlFriday13 said:

I have a cushion-cut sapphire centre stone, with a diamond halo and a half-eternity band, then a 3/4 eternity band wedding ring.

I wanted a sapphire for a lot of reasons -- DH's favourite colour is blue; sapphires were the traditional engagement stone before DeBeers created a false scarcity of diamonds in the 1920s in an effort to bump up their demand and therefore their price; it was really, really important to me to have conflict-free stones; I wanted something 'different'; etc. -- and it fits my personality. 

I've gotten a ton of compliments on it, even after being engaged for a year and now being married. I've had some people ask me if it's my birthstone (no -- I was born in August). I've had some people ask me if I did it because of Duchess Catherine (nope). But I've never had anyone be judgey about it.*

I think, if the ring reflects who you and your FI are as a couple, that's all that matters. If that's moissonite, then that's awesome. I don't believe in lying about stones -- I have a friend whose centre stone is a CZ and she claims it's a diamond -- because then I feel like you're ashamed of what your FI bought you, and if that's the case? You're a douche.

But I love, love, LOVE when people get alternative stones.

*I lied. As I was typing this out, I remembered that DH's BSC grandmother and crazy aunt BOTH told me, "Well, it doesn't look like an engagement ring." Well, who asked you?!

Seriously, I hate that fucking woman more and more with every post of yours.

JCbride2015

misssunshine17 said:

show previous quotes

HisGirlFriday13 said:

*I lied. As I was typing this out, I remembered that DH's BSC grandmother and crazy aunt BOTH told me, "Well, it doesn't look like an engagement ring." Well, who asked you?!

Seriously, I hate that fucking woman more and more with every post of yours.

Me too.

And those comments are extra ridiculous: my birthstone is a sapphire and I have a ring that sounds much like your e-ring but without the halo.  I used to get asked ALL THE TIME if it was an engagement ring.  I know a few women with sapphire engagement rings; they're gorgeous.

HisGirlFriday13

misssunshine17 said:

show previous quotes

HisGirlFriday13 said:

I have a cushion-cut sapphire centre stone, with a diamond halo and a half-eternity band, then a 3/4 eternity band wedding ring.

I wanted a sapphire for a lot of reasons -- DH's favourite colour is blue; sapphires were the traditional engagement stone before DeBeers created a false scarcity of diamonds in the 1920s in an effort to bump up their demand and therefore their price; it was really, really important to me to have conflict-free stones; I wanted something 'different'; etc. -- and it fits my personality. 

I've gotten a ton of compliments on it, even after being engaged for a year and now being married. I've had some people ask me if it's my birthstone (no -- I was born in August). I've had some people ask me if I did it because of Duchess Catherine (nope). But I've never had anyone be judgey about it.*

I think, if the ring reflects who you and your FI are as a couple, that's all that matters. If that's moissonite, then that's awesome. I don't believe in lying about stones -- I have a friend whose centre stone is a CZ and she claims it's a diamond -- because then I feel like you're ashamed of what your FI bought you, and if that's the case? You're a douche.

But I love, love, LOVE when people get alternative stones.

*I lied. As I was typing this out, I remembered that DH's BSC grandmother and crazy aunt BOTH told me, "Well, it doesn't look like an engagement ring." Well, who asked you?!

Seriously, I hate that fucking woman more and more with every post of yours.

HAHA -- Thanks! It's nice to have (virtual) sympathy

monkeysip

smalfrie19

Yup, I love my aquamarine too!  I get lots of compliments on it, but the only downside is that its softer, so it already has a tiny scratch on it (it's been 2 1/2 years since he bought it).  But I didn't want H spending his life savings on a big diamond.  I like having something different

rajahmd

I have an opal engagement ring. I love it. It's my birthstone and my favorite gemstone. I've had people compliment it frequently. I don't regret getting something different at all.

Kerigirl9

I did quite a bit of research on moissanites when we first started talking about getting engaged. The only downsides I saw were that the stone will "color" over time and not be as flawless and they are much softer than diamonds thus allowing for more damage over time. If that's not a biggie to you then go for it.

LDay2014

everyone's preference is different. If you love moissonite, then go for it!  I'm a diamond solitaire girl all the way...but, like many I'm not fond of the cost.  For us, a simple solution was checking kijiji, craigslist, pawn shops etc until we found the deal we wanted.

We ended up getting my ring off kijiji (the guy met us at the jeweller to verify it was in fact a diamond) and we got it for less than 1/4 of the appraisal - which the seller gave us as well.

$1800, appraised for just shy of $10K.

No way in hell was I going to spend the actual value on the ring, but FI was insistent that he wanted what we got.  

buttercup1958

HaileyDancingbear Thank you! You have no idea how annoying it is when people call mineral something else. I always want to test rings if they are actually what they say they are out of curiosity, but I don't think people would like me trying to scratch their rings to see their hardness or streak haha

WildMagelet

I love my moissanite ring. I've never tried to pass it off as a diamond.  If someone asks if its a diamond, I tell them, if they don't I don't bring it up.  I didn't want a diamond, but I still preferred a clear stone.  Personally I love the romantic notion of the mineral originally being found in meteorites (one of our first dates included stargazing).  

HaileyDancingbear

buttercup1958 said:

HaileyDancingbear Thank you! You have no idea how annoying it is when people call mineral something else. I always want to test rings if they are actually what they say they are out of curiosity, but I don't think people would like me trying to scratch their rings to see their hardness or streak haha

I never get why people lie about what's in their ring, it just comes across as tacky to me, because in my mind all they're saying is "I'm lying about how much my FI spent on this ring because I'm ashamed that he didn't break the bank for it."  I just think it's tacky to judge an engagement ring based on how much it cost, since it's sentimental value is all that matters.  

I helped pick out my ring so I know it was inexpensive, and that doesn't bother me at all.  When people ask I'm proud to say my ring is a rainbow moonstone because I think it's gorgeous and to me, it's more precious and valuable than any diamond will ever be because it's a symbol of the commitment my FI and I have made to spend the rest of our lives together.  

smalfrie19

monkeysip said:

smalfrie19

Yup, I love my aquamarine too!  I get lots of compliments on it, but the only downside is that its softer, so it already has a tiny scratch on it (it's been 2 1/2 years since he bought it).  But I didn't want H spending his life savings on a big diamond.  I like having something different

@monkeysip I would LOVE to see a picture of your ring if you are willing to share!!!

monkeysip

Here the prof. picture from the wedding.  It's sitting on H's ring nestled in my hydrangea bouquet.

smalfrie19

monkeysip said:

Here the prof. picture from the wedding.  It's sitting on H's ring nestled in my hydrangea bouquet.

OMG I LOVE IT!!! We are having hydrangeas too!!