Wedding Party

Bridesmaid gone Bridezilla

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Re: Bridesmaid gone Bridezilla

  • AddieCakeAddieCake Beyond the Wall member
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 25 Answers
    I'm interested in what's going through the heads of the folks who "loved" OPs comments.

    I think they must be people who, like the OP, have not enjoyed me at some point in their Knotventures.
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
    image
    PrettyGirlLost
  • AddieL73 said:
    I'm interested in what's going through the heads of the folks who "loved" OPs comments.

    I think they must be people who, like the OP, have not enjoyed me at some point in their Knotventures.
    I don't get it though, I read all their posts and you gave advice to them that they thanked you for, that fell in line with what others said, or you told them nice things about their ideas or projects.

    imageimageimage

    You'll never be subject to a cash bar, gap, potluck wedding, or b-list if you marry a Muppet Overlord.
    PrettyGirlLost
  • Points for puppies...
  • AddieL73 said:
    I'm interested in what's going through the heads of the folks who "loved" OPs comments.

    I think they must be people who, like the OP, have not enjoyed me at some point in their Knotventures.
    I don't get it though, I read all their posts and you gave advice to them that they thanked you for, that fell in line with what others said, or you told them nice things about their ideas or projects.

    I personally "loved" one of OPs posts because of a point she made that telling an OP who is asking for advice that she should have done something different in the past or even scolding her for it is not suuuuuper helpful.  I see that happen to several OPs and can understand why some get frustrated.  Certainly wasn't me rooting against Addie or anything personal like that!  :)
    image
    thefuturemrssisk
  • antotoantoto member
    500 Love Its 100 Comments Second Anniversary First Answer
    edited February 2014
    scribe95 said:
    antoto said:
    AddieL73 said:
    I'm interested in what's going through the heads of the folks who "loved" OPs comments.

    I think they must be people who, like the OP, have not enjoyed me at some point in their Knotventures.
    I don't get it though, I read all their posts and you gave advice to them that they thanked you for, that fell in line with what others said, or you told them nice things about their ideas or projects.

    I personally "loved" one of OPs posts because of a point she made that telling an OP who is asking for advice that she should have done something different in the past or even scolding her for it is not suuuuuper helpful.  I see that happen to several OPs and can understand why some get frustrated.  Certainly wasn't me rooting against Addie or anything personal like that!  :)
    When posters point out a mistake a bride made that could have avoided the situation in the first place, it might be frustrating for the OP but it is suuuuuper helpful to other brides who can avoid the same mistake.
    I agree with your point - but I have seen posters say things like "for all future brides reading this.. whatever whatever"  That is far less antagonizing and then it is actually helping people.  Rather than being all "OP you should have done such and such, duh"
    image
    abbyj700KeepMovingOnthefuturemrssisk
  • Totally agree Antoto. Pointing it out and saying "hey lurkers - keep this in mind" or "hindsight is 20/ 20 but for anyone else planning their wedding" is really a great way to help others learn from a persons past mistake rather than just railroading the OP. 
  • Hi OP, you have a lot of people reprimanding you for including this woman but really it's too late to worry about that now! Now's the time for you to just get through your own ceremony. If she's flakey, self centered or inattentive, just stop relying on her to get things done. Work her out of the circle of people whose opinions or presence you need to get things done. Just tell her what dress to buy and give her instructions she needs to complete her obligation. If she's so preoccupied with her own wedding, maybe she'll even be relieved at the simplicity your new approach offers.
    thefuturemrssisk
  • Regardless of how answers benefit lurkers... I think it's perfectly okay to acknowledge where someone went wrong for the direct benefit of the OP.

    It provides perspective and in this case, maybe can help OP understand how this rant sounds to others, and to recognize her anger is misdirected at the bridesmaid. This will then help her understand the context of the provided solutions.

    Let's face of it: we're not always right. It never feels good to be told we made bad choices. However; if we are adult enough to consider the reactions provided, we can use that information to grow and make better decisions moving forward.

    I'd hate for OP to leave this thread thinking she's a bigger person for allowing this chick to be in her bridal party, and to feel justified in disposing of her for the reasons she's listed. 

    imageimageimage

    You'll never be subject to a cash bar, gap, potluck wedding, or b-list if you marry a Muppet Overlord.
    Maggie0829
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