Bridesmaid gone Bridezilla

Re: Bridesmaid gone Bridezilla

• AddieCake member

  

  February 2014

  MuppetOverlord said:

  I'm interested in what's going through the heads of the folks who "loved" OPs comments.
  

  
  I think they must be people who, like the OP, have not enjoyed me at some point in their Knotventures.

  What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14

  

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• MuppetOverlord member

  

  February 2014

  AddieL73 said:

  MuppetOverlord said:

  I'm interested in what's going through the heads of the folks who "loved" OPs comments.
  

  
  I think they must be people who, like the OP, have not enjoyed me at some point in their Knotventures.

  I don't get it though, I read all their posts and you gave advice to them that they thanked you for, that fell in line with what others said, or you told them nice things about their ideas or projects.
  
  

  
  
  You'll never be subject to a cash bar, gap, potluck wedding, or b-list if you marry a Muppet Overlord.

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• arrippa member

  

  February 2014 edited February 2014

  chibiyui said:

  Kelcita21 said:

  thefuturemrssisk said:

  @AddieL73 I've seen your posts on many, many boards and the majority of the comments seem very rude or offensive to me, so that is what I meant by your trolling. Responding with "ditto" doesn't exactly aid advice. If someone has already said it, then it really doesn't stimulate the conversation for you to simply repeat what they said. If we're going to argue on grammar now, I meant exactly what I said. I care what everyone has to say, I simply care less about your thoughts on whether you pity me or not and more about some advice that people can give me on my current situation. You really shouldn't argue about people's grammar, if you can't manage to understand the context. Also, I'm confused as to why you didn't leave me your name and address, since you wanted an invitation to the wedding, but good luck with your own life, sweetie!

  Ugh. People who say "sweetie" usually have their panties in a bunch and ran out of insults. 

  Ex-squeeze me?
  
  
  
  

  I miss Rory.

   

  OP-What kind of advice are you looking for? The PPs (and Addie) gave excellent advice. 

  chibiyui said:

  Stop including her. Tell her what dress she needs and when and where to show up. If she doesn't show up then oh well.

  THIS!

  

   Just because..

  
   

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• abbyj700 member

  

  February 2014

  Points for puppies...

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• AddieCake member

  

  February 2014

  Huh. Well, I don't know, then. Maybe they just wanted waffles. Anyway, thanks, everyone else, for the support. I would very much like to take you out for cake. Or cake vodka shots.

  What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14

  

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• MairePoppy mod

  

  February 2014

  Here's to Addie

  
  

  
  

                     

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• antoto member

  

  February 2014

  MuppetOverlord said:

  AddieL73 said:

  MuppetOverlord said:

  I'm interested in what's going through the heads of the folks who "loved" OPs comments.
  

  
  I think they must be people who, like the OP, have not enjoyed me at some point in their Knotventures.

  I don't get it though, I read all their posts and you gave advice to them that they thanked you for, that fell in line with what others said, or you told them nice things about their ideas or projects.
  
  

  I personally "loved" one of OPs posts because of a point she made that telling an OP who is asking for advice that she should have done something different in the past or even scolding her for it is not suuuuuper helpful.  I see that happen to several OPs and can understand why some get frustrated.  Certainly wasn't me rooting against Addie or anything personal like that!  

  
  

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• antoto member

  

  February 2014 edited February 2014

  scribe95 said:

  antoto said:

  MuppetOverlord said:

  AddieL73 said:

  MuppetOverlord said:

  I'm interested in what's going through the heads of the folks who "loved" OPs comments.
  

  
  I think they must be people who, like the OP, have not enjoyed me at some point in their Knotventures.

  I don't get it though, I read all their posts and you gave advice to them that they thanked you for, that fell in line with what others said, or you told them nice things about their ideas or projects.
  
  

  I personally "loved" one of OPs posts because of a point she made that telling an OP who is asking for advice that she should have done something different in the past or even scolding her for it is not suuuuuper helpful.  I see that happen to several OPs and can understand why some get frustrated.  Certainly wasn't me rooting against Addie or anything personal like that!  

  When posters point out a mistake a bride made that could have avoided the situation in the first place, it might be frustrating for the OP but it is suuuuuper helpful to other brides who can avoid the same mistake.
  

  I agree with your point - but I have seen posters say things like "for all future brides reading this.. whatever whatever"  That is far less antagonizing and then it is actually helping people.  Rather than being all "OP you should have done such and such, duh"

  
  

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• abbyj700 member

  

  February 2014

  Totally agree Antoto. Pointing it out and saying "hey lurkers - keep this in mind" or "hindsight is 20/ 20 but for anyone else planning their wedding" is really a great way to help others learn from a persons past mistake rather than just railroading the OP. 

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• AddieCake member

  

  February 2014 edited February 2014

  Can the lurkers or future people who come along not glean for themselves that they might be able to use that information w/o an announcement like "Lurkers and other brides, take note!" to them? I guess I just assume they AREN'T stupid and can manage to figure that out on their own. When I was lurking here and planning my wedding, I frequently saw things and managed to say to myself, "Ooooh, that's a good point/idea/suggestion. I will have to remember that if it comes up for me." Nobody had to point out to me to do so. There is nothing wrong with the way I post. If there was, I would be banned. Therefore, I will continue to post the way I have always posted. Take it or leave it, folks!

  What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14

  

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• alisonoo member

  

  February 2014

  Hi OP, you have a lot of people reprimanding you for including this woman but really it's too late to worry about that now! Now's the time for you to just get through your own ceremony. If she's flakey, self centered or inattentive, just stop relying on her to get things done. Work her out of the circle of people whose opinions or presence you need to get things done. Just tell her what dress to buy and give her instructions she needs to complete her obligation. If she's so preoccupied with her own wedding, maybe she'll even be relieved at the simplicity your new approach offers.

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• MuppetOverlord member

  

  February 2014

  Regardless of how answers benefit lurkers... I think it's perfectly okay to acknowledge where someone went wrong for the direct benefit of the OP.

  It provides perspective and in this case, maybe can help OP understand how this rant sounds to others, and to recognize her anger is misdirected at the bridesmaid. This will then help her understand the context of the provided solutions.

  Let's face of it: we're not always right. It never feels good to be told we made bad choices. However; if we are adult enough to consider the reactions provided, we can use that information to grow and make better decisions moving forward.

  I'd hate for OP to leave this thread thinking she's a bigger person for allowing this chick to be in her bridal party, and to feel justified in disposing of her for the reasons she's listed. 

  
  
  You'll never be subject to a cash bar, gap, potluck wedding, or b-list if you marry a Muppet Overlord.

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