How do you go about "uninviting" people? First off, I know how rude this sounds but hear me out. After I got engaged I of course called and told my parents, but the next month I started compiling a list of who to invite. As a courtesy I called my mother and asked if there were anyone in particular she wanted me to add to my list. I told her we were trying to keep the guest list small, but I know she wanted to bring Eddie (her SO) but didn't want to ask. So I threw him on there. Now, my dad and I don't get along and hardly EVER talk... And when I mean ever, I mean... I called him every week for three months with not even a "screw you" text back for three more months after. But to be fair, I asked if he had anyone he would like me to add; I told him the same as my mother... I wanted it small. He told me, "well you HAVE to invite everyone". Meaning everyone on his side of the family. That would be 200+ and I can't afford that. So I asked him if he would be willing to help pay, so he could have all of his family there. He said no. So, again, I told him I was keeping it small because I can't afford to have everyone there. Well, he decided to call 40 people from his side and "invite" them to my wedding. The majority of them are married with anywhere from two-four children. I honestly mean it when I say, I cannot afford it. I'm already throwing everything I have left after bills into my savings and I REFUSE to get a credit card. My groom already has one and I will not ask him to add extra debt to it.
So this isn't a "should I or shouldn't I" post. This is a how do I word things appropriately without "outing" my father and without saying "I'm sorry but we're too poor to feed you". Advice please?