So I'm going back to therapy, and I don't care if my insurance doesn't cover it because I'll be sending the bill to my dad.
He started blowing up my phone at the end of the work day yesterday to the point that I thought someone had died. I left my office and called him back. He immediately starts ripping me to shreds over the fucking catering costs, because the estimate is higher than it was originally, BECAUSE HE ADDED PEOPLE TO THE GUEST LIST. I can't even tell you how many times I warned him, "the more people you add, the more costs go up."
He then starts bitching that not a single one of his friends is on my guest list because I wouldn't allow him to invite anyone. I start naming all his friends that are on my list. He snaps at me, "I didn't even want to invite any of those people!" Uh... those 30 people are not my relatives and not my friends so why the fuck are they on my guest list if you don't want them there? (He does want them there, he just loves to act like a difficult little bitch). When he had tried to add more people beyond those 30 I put my foot down and wouldn't let him, and he's STILL throwing fits about it (this was settled like a year ago).
When it was obvious all he wanted was a fight, and to treat me like his punching bag (he must have been bored), I said the conversation was over and hung up.
He originally wanted to pay for food, bar, and dessert. I declined his offers after previous tantrums of his, but he clung onto the food. Now FI and I are scrambling to find places to cut costs so we can cover that too, which has been extremely difficult because a lot of things have already been paid for, and no matter what, we'll be losing deposits. Invitations haven't gone out yet but we can't really cut people out to save money because people have already gotten STDs (months ago) so we'd be uninviting them. And we originally had been leaving room in the budget for this exact scenario, but we had a few emergencies that weren't wedding related that really ate into our finances. Ugh.
But it gets better (worse?). My aunt that I'm super close to decided to intervene and tell him what a ridiculous psycho he's been. I had no problem with her stepping in at that point because I seriously thought I was gonna lose my mind last night. My dad tells aunt that I'm "hateful and unreasonable" because I wouldn't stay on the phone. (My aunt disagreed; she was really proud of me for ending the conversation because she knows that's the only way to deal with him. He will not stop raging, so you have to walk away).
He told her I have some grudge against him, and will not "allow" him to be nice to me. Um... unless he's a robot and I have his remote control and am programming him to act like a dick, how is it possible to "not allow" someone to be nice? My aunt asked him to do some self-reflection and try to realize that maybe the way I act towards him is actually a reaction to the way he's been treating me. He says no, there's no problem with how he treats me, cuz he's so nice and great, and I'm just hateful, so it must be some inner problem that I have which has nothing to do with him. Right.
The kicker was when he told my aunt that it's my fault that my sister attacked me. I supposedly "provoked her" and "made her" attack me. My aunt stopped him there too and said "Novella has told me the entire story, and her mother has told me the entire story. Their versions match and yours doesn't. In fact, all three of you have said that YOU were not even in the room when it happened. So how can you possibly be blaming the whole thing on Novella?"
When he had nothing left to bitch about, he lied and said I wanted him to give me $20,000 for my wedding and that's why he was mad. He said I had started yelling at him and would not allow him to talk to me at all. Um no. The catering is around $6,000 and it's what HE chose and what HE wanted to pay, and that's IT. And I never yelled at him. Not at all. He's a fucking psycho.
So last night I had a nightmare about this, woke up at 2am, never fell back asleep, and my stomach was upset the entire time, which is what always happens when I get super stressed. I'm working from home today.
Sorry for bitching about my dad yet again. This is just too much.