Hello Everyone!
Please read below and tell me what to do. Any input is greatly appreciated.
Background Information:
Maids of Honor
1. My sister
2. Best friend of 10 years, I was her MOH in her wedding a few months ago. We are very close and our families are best friends.
Bridesmaids
1. Another sister
2. Cousin
3. Close friend
I have paid for their dresses, jewelry, hair, and makeup. At our first official bridal party lunch, I gave all the girls an Alex and Ani bracelet with their initial. I have been a very laid-back bride and do not demand anything of my bridesmaids.
My bachelorette party was last weekend. I wanted to do a weekend at a local ski resort. One of my Bridesmaids was able to get us a cabin in the woods for a very decent price. I wanted to keep costs low for everyone and this worked out great.
This idea was solidified in January. In early February, I sent out and email to the entire group detailing the cost of the weekend and included the ski resort information and local nightlife "hotspots". Later that week, I sent out another email breaking down what everyone needed to bring for the 3 days we were away (liquor, food, supplies, misc). Every week from that point on until the bachelorette weekend, I sent an email to everyone including the necessary information. I even included weather information. The forecast called for snow and freezing temps so I advised that everyone dress warm and in layers.
Fast forward to Friday when we are leaving:
My bridesmaid (cousin) and MOH (best friend) are set to leave on Firday at 5:00 PM. MOH is to be at BM house at 5 PM sharp. I paired them together because they live the closest to each other. BM left work early at 4:00 PM so she could be ready to go at 5:00 PM sharp.
MOH is 2.5 hours late in reaching BM house. MOH gets into BM car, doesn't apologize. BM gets angry and frustrated. MOH demands to be dropped off instantly (BM is driving on a highway). BM goes back to her house, drops off MOH.
I get a flurry of angry texts from MOH, saying how my cousin is "rude, disrespectful, etc". My cousin arrives at the cabin and immediately apologizes for the situation and offers to drop out of the bridal party because she was so embarrassed with how things panned out. No word from MOH.
About an hour later, MOH sends me a message saying how she is not comfortable being in a cabin for 3 days with BM. I totally understand and tell her we will talk when I get back home.
I get back home on Monday, send MOH a message asking her to call me. No response
I send another message and ask her to come to my house anytime as I would prefer to speak to her in person rather than over texts and emails.
She responds with how she is "disappointed in my reaction to the situation". Again, I ask her to come over so we can sit down and talk.
No response. I am debating how to deal with the disaster. I am 40 days from the wedding. I paid for her dress, ordered her jewelry, robe, other goodies. The rest of the bridal party is demanding that I kick her out immediately.
Thursday afternoon, I am on FB and see that she is tagged in Florida. I have had it at this point. I message her immediately and remove her from the bridal party. She fires back at how I need to "grow up" and stop making people feel like they "owe" me things.
She claims she "would have" texted me on Friday when she got back to NY.
There is a lot more to this story but I don't want to bore you.
Is what I did wrong? How would you have reacted?
Thanks for reading!