@Novella1186 and other May 2 brides!

plainjane0415

I feel like the past 11 months that I have been planning have been stress free.  Then April hits, and boom! stress! for no reason.  Just trying to stay calm, do other stuff besides wedding stuff, and squeeze in an extra work out or two to help with added stress.

ETA:  Props to all of you doing the big wedding thing.  And hope you all have a stress free experience for your remaining days!

novella1186

plainjane0415 that's kind of how I feel too. The stress has been hitting me hard. Like every time I look at the calendar I feel like I'm about to have a panic attack.

I've about had it with our florist, which is really stressing me this week. I've sent them several emails with some pretty damn important questions (like what is our final balance, that was due last week and didn't get paid, because I had made some changes to the contract). They never bothered to get back to me. Then I hear from the owner weeks later and I get "oh my assistant should have contacted you by now." Nope, no one has contacted me. 

Finally I hear from the assistant, and it took 2 days to get a phone meeting scheduled with her. 20 minutes after we set the phone meeting, she emails me and cancels. So I try to re-schedule for next week and haven't heard back yet. I don't even know if/when they're dropping flowers off.

Yesterday they were supposed to send me the final invoice and they didn't. 

I just want to call the owner and be like "Are you even fucking doing this? Cuz where the fuck have you been?" So frustrating. 

anjemon

badbnagdway said:

novella1186 said:

One of my closest cousins isn't coming and I'm bummed out. I'm even more bummed out about why he isn't coming though; he recently lost his job, his girlfriend dumped him, his truck died and needs a new engine, and he's just had a lot of hard luck and financial issues, so he doesn't have the money to travel here right now. 

He said he was really sad he couldn't make it. Then he said, "My life is a country song right now. If I had a dog, it would die." Poor guy  

My RSVP vent: Our deadline is past, and our caterer needs the final count TOMORROW. So I've been tracking people down, and I've gotten a few "I don't know yet." or "Probably." or "I'll let you know." One person even told me maybe, then my dad texted me and said her parents' said she's coming, which I questioned because that didn't seem like reliable info based on my conversation with her, to which my dad responded "well I don't know." 

No, people. I need to know!!! I can't "maybe" pay $44 for your plate of food. I can't "probably" have a seat for you. Ugh! If I pay for the food and you don't show, that's shitty. If I don't pay for it and you do show, you get no food, and that's shitty. Why do people not understand this?!!!! 

Ugh. That is super annoying. We only have a few people who are doing that -- one is a friend of mine who lives in another country and running for public office. She can't tell what her schedule is going to be because of the election. I'm just going to include her in our count. Another are some of FI's family that I won't get into. 

The last set is the most annoying -- a friend, and I use that term loosely because mostly she is in one of our friend circles and we thought she'd feel left out if we didn't invite her, originally said she wasn't going to come. She works for an event planner in town and she was annoyed we didn't hire her/them for our wedding. She therefore is working another wedding that day and has told us several times that it's a "$150,000 wedding". She said her boyfriend was going to come without her, and then he said he wasn't sure if he was coming. Then she said she was going to come, but really late. I kind of hate them both right now and especially am annoyed with her attempts to belittle our wedding by bringing up how fancy the other wedding is. Fuck you, bitch, my wedding rules. Just because someone spends $150k on a wedding doesn't mean it will be awesome. 

So far I've done this for two people. Which I'm also considering the "people show up without RSVPing" buffer. One is a friend who just had a baby. She's not sure if she can make it, but I really want her to have the option. So I'm keeping her seat open and letting her know it's okay if she can't come last minute for baby reasons.

The other is my friend's mom. I invited her rather last minute because I found out she was planning to travel with my friend and watch her kids. I just got her the chicken because I haven't really heard from my friend. I'm planning to bug her about it when I see her this weekend, but for now there's a seat and a plate for her.

mikenberger

So about that almost one week away thing...

Anybody else obessively looking at their registry and the weather??

novella1186

mikenberger yep, I check the weather about every hour. Yesterday it was SNOWING here. Our ceremony is supposed to be outside... I'm trying to force myself not to count on it being outside at this point so that I don't feel disappointed when we have to move everything indoors. 

blabla89

Right now the forecast says rain here. I won't be super disappointed about moving the ceremony indoors but I will be disappointed about not being able to take pictures outside. Andplusalso my hair will get frizzy.

On the bright side, my dress is fixed so it won't fall down anymore! And I made room in my budget to hire a cleaning lady to get my apartment ready for guests, because I do NOT have time to do that myself.

mikenberger

blabla89 said:

Right now the forecast says rain here. I won't be super disappointed about moving the ceremony indoors but I will be disappointed about not being able to take pictures outside. Andplusalso my hair will get frizzy.

On the bright side, my dress is fixed so it won't fall down anymore! And I made room in my budget to hire a cleaning lady to get my apartment ready for guests, because I do NOT have time to do that myself.

I love my cleaning lady. She comes on Wednesday right before all the insanity begins and man. I think I may leave her a $100 bill. I'm at the point where I'm like 

just throwing money everywhere.

plainjane0415

mikenberger said:

blabla89 said:

Right now the forecast says rain here. I won't be super disappointed about moving the ceremony indoors but I will be disappointed about not being able to take pictures outside. Andplusalso my hair will get frizzy.

On the bright side, my dress is fixed so it won't fall down anymore! And I made room in my budget to hire a cleaning lady to get my apartment ready for guests, because I do NOT have time to do that myself.

I love my cleaning lady. She comes on Wednesday right before all the insanity begins and man. I think I may leave her a $100 bill. I'm at the point where I'm like 

just throwing money everywhere.

QFT

blabla89

mikenberger said:

blabla89 said:

Right now the forecast says rain here. I won't be super disappointed about moving the ceremony indoors but I will be disappointed about not being able to take pictures outside. Andplusalso my hair will get frizzy.

On the bright side, my dress is fixed so it won't fall down anymore! And I made room in my budget to hire a cleaning lady to get my apartment ready for guests, because I do NOT have time to do that myself.

I love my cleaning lady. She comes on Wednesday right before all the insanity begins and man. I think I may leave her a $100 bill. I'm at the point where I'm like 

just throwing money everywhere.

Might leaver her a $100 bill? Like, she normally charges less than that? That's unheard of here and I'm jealous!

plainjane0415

I'll be married in exactly one week.  I can't believe it.

The most stressful thing for me right now is the packing.  I thought, that I would be able to get everything (clothes, shoes, the few wedding décor items we have) into my large suitcase. That is not going to work out. I HATE having to check 2 bags.  I'm usually a pretty good packer, but this time, it just aint gonna work.

So like @mikenberger, the money is just flying for me, with last minute stuff I am getting, to hair, and nail appts, to now, 2 checked bag fees.

I just have to keep telling myself that I will be on the beach in 3 days, and it will all be ok.

mikenberger

blabla89 said:

mikenberger said:

blabla89 said:

Right now the forecast says rain here. I won't be super disappointed about moving the ceremony indoors but I will be disappointed about not being able to take pictures outside. Andplusalso my hair will get frizzy.

On the bright side, my dress is fixed so it won't fall down anymore! And I made room in my budget to hire a cleaning lady to get my apartment ready for guests, because I do NOT have time to do that myself.

I love my cleaning lady. She comes on Wednesday right before all the insanity begins and man. I think I may leave her a $100 bill. I'm at the point where I'm like 

just throwing money everywhere.

Might leaver her a $100 bill? Like, she normally charges less than that? That's unheard of here and I'm jealous!

I pay $99 every two weeks for a full house cleaning on a 1800sq foot house. But I'm also in the Midwest in a town of 30k people haha perks to living in a small town!

mikenberger

I just added up roughly the "over budget" that we are over...

Eight thousand.

Granted, we paid A LOT of stuff when we first got engaged (18 months ago) so I haven't really noticed but holyfuckingtapdancingchrist. Wow. 

novella1186

mikenberger said:

blabla89 said:

Right now the forecast says rain here. I won't be super disappointed about moving the ceremony indoors but I will be disappointed about not being able to take pictures outside. Andplusalso my hair will get frizzy.

On the bright side, my dress is fixed so it won't fall down anymore! And I made room in my budget to hire a cleaning lady to get my apartment ready for guests, because I do NOT have time to do that myself.

I love my cleaning lady. She comes on Wednesday right before all the insanity begins and man. I think I may leave her a $100 bill. I'm at the point where I'm like 

just throwing money everywhere.

lol yep! I just hit the point yesterday where I was like, well fuck you credit card. I try to avoid using it but I want to keep as much cash as possible in my bank account since we're traveling out of the country and whatnot. So.... whatever. Fuck it. 

badbnagdway

novella1186 said:

mikenberger said:

blabla89 said:

Right now the forecast says rain here. I won't be super disappointed about moving the ceremony indoors but I will be disappointed about not being able to take pictures outside. Andplusalso my hair will get frizzy.

On the bright side, my dress is fixed so it won't fall down anymore! And I made room in my budget to hire a cleaning lady to get my apartment ready for guests, because I do NOT have time to do that myself.

I love my cleaning lady. She comes on Wednesday right before all the insanity begins and man. I think I may leave her a $100 bill. I'm at the point where I'm like 

just throwing money everywhere.

lol yep! I just hit the point yesterday where I was like, well fuck you credit card. I try to avoid using it but I want to keep as much cash as possible in my bank account since we're traveling out of the country and whatnot. So.... whatever. Fuck it. 

Umm, yes, I likewise hit the point where I was like, fuck it, throw money at this thing until it submits. $125 for a security guard? Yes. $75 for servers at our rehearsal dinner? Yes. 

Question for you all: how long (including cocktail hour) will your reception be? 

novella1186

badbnagdway said:

novella1186 said:

mikenberger said:

blabla89 said:

Right now the forecast says rain here. I won't be super disappointed about moving the ceremony indoors but I will be disappointed about not being able to take pictures outside. Andplusalso my hair will get frizzy.

On the bright side, my dress is fixed so it won't fall down anymore! And I made room in my budget to hire a cleaning lady to get my apartment ready for guests, because I do NOT have time to do that myself.

I love my cleaning lady. She comes on Wednesday right before all the insanity begins and man. I think I may leave her a $100 bill. I'm at the point where I'm like 

just throwing money everywhere.

lol yep! I just hit the point yesterday where I was like, well fuck you credit card. I try to avoid using it but I want to keep as much cash as possible in my bank account since we're traveling out of the country and whatnot. So.... whatever. Fuck it. 

Umm, yes, I likewise hit the point where I was like, fuck it, throw money at this thing until it submits. $125 for a security guard? Yes. $75 for servers at our rehearsal dinner? Yes. 

Question for you all: how long (including cocktail hour) will your reception be? 

$30 for dessert platters, $50 for the extra table cloths, $75 for FI's belt, yep. Yep yep yep. Fine. Fuckityfine. 

Our reception starts at about 5:30 and we have to shut down by 11 because of local ordinances, so I guess the max it will be is 5 and a half hours 

mikenberger

badbnagdway said:

novella1186 said:

mikenberger said:

blabla89 said:

Right now the forecast says rain here. I won't be super disappointed about moving the ceremony indoors but I will be disappointed about not being able to take pictures outside. Andplusalso my hair will get frizzy.

On the bright side, my dress is fixed so it won't fall down anymore! And I made room in my budget to hire a cleaning lady to get my apartment ready for guests, because I do NOT have time to do that myself.

I love my cleaning lady. She comes on Wednesday right before all the insanity begins and man. I think I may leave her a $100 bill. I'm at the point where I'm like 

just throwing money everywhere.

lol yep! I just hit the point yesterday where I was like, well fuck you credit card. I try to avoid using it but I want to keep as much cash as possible in my bank account since we're traveling out of the country and whatnot. So.... whatever. Fuck it. 

Umm, yes, I likewise hit the point where I was like, fuck it, throw money at this thing until it submits. $125 for a security guard? Yes. $75 for servers at our rehearsal dinner? Yes. 

Question for you all: how long (including cocktail hour) will your reception be? 

Ours will be from 3:45pm (give or take 5mins based off ceremony time) to 10:30pm. 

blabla89

badbnagdway said:

novella1186 said:

mikenberger said:

blabla89 said:

Right now the forecast says rain here. I won't be super disappointed about moving the ceremony indoors but I will be disappointed about not being able to take pictures outside. Andplusalso my hair will get frizzy.

On the bright side, my dress is fixed so it won't fall down anymore! And I made room in my budget to hire a cleaning lady to get my apartment ready for guests, because I do NOT have time to do that myself.

I love my cleaning lady. She comes on Wednesday right before all the insanity begins and man. I think I may leave her a $100 bill. I'm at the point where I'm like 

just throwing money everywhere.

lol yep! I just hit the point yesterday where I was like, well fuck you credit card. I try to avoid using it but I want to keep as much cash as possible in my bank account since we're traveling out of the country and whatnot. So.... whatever. Fuck it. 

Umm, yes, I likewise hit the point where I was like, fuck it, throw money at this thing until it submits. $125 for a security guard? Yes. $75 for servers at our rehearsal dinner? Yes. 

Question for you all: how long (including cocktail hour) will your reception be? 

2:30-6:30pm, so 4 hours.

badbnagdway

Have you guys done your seating charts and room plans yet? 

Someone on these boards once said a seating chart is like a jigsaw puzzle, but with emotions. They could not be more right. The nightmare people for me are FI's mom and sister. They surely would like to sit together, but no one else in FI's family would want to sit with FI's mom. They have SO's but they won't tell me if they're bringing them. Therefore they are an undefined number of pieces that just won't fit anywhere. 

littlepep

Just wanted to comment on this and say that the other day I was talking to FI and I said, I feel like something is happening May 2. And FI was like our wedding party that my mom is hosting? I'm like no no that's not it... And then I go, OH! a bunch of girls from TK are getting married that day. He was just like 

 

novella1186

badbnagdway said:

Have you guys done your seating charts and room plans yet? 

Someone on these boards once said a seating chart is like a jigsaw puzzle, but with emotions. They could not be more right. The nightmare people for me are FI's mom and sister. They surely would like to sit together, but no one else in FI's family would want to sit with FI's mom. They have SO's but they won't tell me if they're bringing them. Therefore they are an undefined number of pieces that just won't fit anywhere. 

I got really lucky with the seating chart. We're having big long tables ("Harvest style" seating) so my parents and their closest friends and relatives are at one. I didn't have to worry about splitting people up into small groups because so many people can fit at one table. I made sure my parents are sitting next to-- or across from-- whoever they're closest to, and just worked outward from there. Everyone is next to or across from someone they know/are close to/good friends with. No big deal. 

Repeated that process for FI's parents' table. 

The middle table is FI and I, the wedding party, their SOs, and then on each end is our siblings, cousins, and close friends. Easy peasy. 

mikenberger

badbnagdway said:

Have you guys done your seating charts and room plans yet? 

Someone on these boards once said a seating chart is like a jigsaw puzzle, but with emotions. They could not be more right. The nightmare people for me are FI's mom and sister. They surely would like to sit together, but no one else in FI's family would want to sit with FI's mom. They have SO's but they won't tell me if they're bringing them. Therefore they are an undefined number of pieces that just won't fit anywhere. 

We just did our room plan last night with our venue coordinator and DOC. Well, they did it and told me why they made their choices and I wrote a check. I honesty don't care. My words were "I want a chair for every butt. And a few extra chairs should the butts not want to sit by each other." So we have 173 in the audience? tables? and we're doing 24 tables seating 8 each. No seating chart. So there are 2 extra tables to accommodate those that don't fill. 

I've actually only been to one wedding where the tables were assigned and it was terrible. I was not a fan, at all. And the friends I've spoken to are not fans of it either. It's helpful though that we frequently have parties so 95% of our guest list knows each other or at least has met each other.

badbnagdway

mikenberger said:

badbnagdway said:

Have you guys done your seating charts and room plans yet? 

Someone on these boards once said a seating chart is like a jigsaw puzzle, but with emotions. They could not be more right. The nightmare people for me are FI's mom and sister. They surely would like to sit together, but no one else in FI's family would want to sit with FI's mom. They have SO's but they won't tell me if they're bringing them. Therefore they are an undefined number of pieces that just won't fit anywhere. 

We just did our room plan last night with our venue coordinator and DOC. Well, they did it and told me why they made their choices and I wrote a check. I honesty don't care. My words were "I want a chair for every butt. And a few extra chairs should the butts not want to sit by each other." So we have 173 in the audience? tables? and we're doing 24 tables seating 8 each. No seating chart. So there are 2 extra tables to accommodate those that don't fill. 

I've actually only been to one wedding where the tables were assigned and it was terrible. I was not a fan, at all. And the friends I've spoken to are not fans of it either. It's helpful though that we frequently have parties so 95% of our guest list knows each other or at least has met each other.

It's great that no seating chart will work for you but most weddings would be better served with a seating chart/table assignments. It's pretty unusual in my experience for people to know each other that well and weddings I've gone to without some kind of assigned table have been less enjoyable than those where I was seated with people I knew or had something in common with. 

In our case we have people who CANNOT be near each other. Also, I don't think any of the tables are "bad" but I do want to make sure that, for example, my grandmother is not right next to the DJ. 

blabla89

littlepep said:

Just wanted to comment on this and say that the other day I was talking to FI and I said, I feel like something is happening May 2. And FI was like our wedding party that my mom is hosting? I'm like no no that's not it... And then I go, OH! a bunch of girls from TK are getting married that day. He was just like 

 

Yesterday I told FI about this thread and how it's basically 4 pages of us all going


He thought it was cute.

mikenberger

badbnagdway said:

mikenberger said:

badbnagdway said:

Have you guys done your seating charts and room plans yet? 

Someone on these boards once said a seating chart is like a jigsaw puzzle, but with emotions. They could not be more right. The nightmare people for me are FI's mom and sister. They surely would like to sit together, but no one else in FI's family would want to sit with FI's mom. They have SO's but they won't tell me if they're bringing them. Therefore they are an undefined number of pieces that just won't fit anywhere. 

We just did our room plan last night with our venue coordinator and DOC. Well, they did it and told me why they made their choices and I wrote a check. I honesty don't care. My words were "I want a chair for every butt. And a few extra chairs should the butts not want to sit by each other." So we have 173 in the audience? tables? and we're doing 24 tables seating 8 each. No seating chart. So there are 2 extra tables to accommodate those that don't fill. 

I've actually only been to one wedding where the tables were assigned and it was terrible. I was not a fan, at all. And the friends I've spoken to are not fans of it either. It's helpful though that we frequently have parties so 95% of our guest list knows each other or at least has met each other.

It's great that no seating chart will work for you but most weddings would be better served with a seating chart/table assignments. It's pretty unusual in my experience for people to know each other that well and weddings I've gone to without some kind of assigned table have been less enjoyable than those where I was seated with people I knew or had something in common with. 

In our case we have people who CANNOT be near each other. Also, I don't think any of the tables are "bad" but I do want to make sure that, for example, my grandmother is not right next to the DJ. 

haha yeah, it's definitely not for everybody. A wedding we went to in New Jersey, they had assigned seating and it was weird for us, but you could tell that everybody was very used to it and it was nice to meet new people.

plainjane0415

badbnagdway said:

mikenberger said:

badbnagdway said:

Have you guys done your seating charts and room plans yet? 

Someone on these boards once said a seating chart is like a jigsaw puzzle, but with emotions. They could not be more right. The nightmare people for me are FI's mom and sister. They surely would like to sit together, but no one else in FI's family would want to sit with FI's mom. They have SO's but they won't tell me if they're bringing them. Therefore they are an undefined number of pieces that just won't fit anywhere. 

We just did our room plan last night with our venue coordinator and DOC. Well, they did it and told me why they made their choices and I wrote a check. I honesty don't care. My words were "I want a chair for every butt. And a few extra chairs should the butts not want to sit by each other." So we have 173 in the audience? tables? and we're doing 24 tables seating 8 each. No seating chart. So there are 2 extra tables to accommodate those that don't fill. 

I've actually only been to one wedding where the tables were assigned and it was terrible. I was not a fan, at all. And the friends I've spoken to are not fans of it either. It's helpful though that we frequently have parties so 95% of our guest list knows each other or at least has met each other.

It's great that no seating chart will work for you but most weddings would be better served with a seating chart/table assignments. It's pretty unusual in my experience for people to know each other that well and weddings I've gone to without some kind of assigned table have been less enjoyable than those where I was seated with people I knew or had something in common with. 

In our case we have people who CANNOT be near each other. Also, I don't think any of the tables are "bad" but I do want to make sure that, for example, my grandmother is not right next to the DJ. 

I've never been to a wedding where there was a seating chart.  Everything worked out fine. I disagree with the bolded. I think it's a case of knowing your circle.

novella1186

plainjane0415 said:

badbnagdway said:

mikenberger said:

badbnagdway said:

Have you guys done your seating charts and room plans yet? 

Someone on these boards once said a seating chart is like a jigsaw puzzle, but with emotions. They could not be more right. The nightmare people for me are FI's mom and sister. They surely would like to sit together, but no one else in FI's family would want to sit with FI's mom. They have SO's but they won't tell me if they're bringing them. Therefore they are an undefined number of pieces that just won't fit anywhere. 

We just did our room plan last night with our venue coordinator and DOC. Well, they did it and told me why they made their choices and I wrote a check. I honesty don't care. My words were "I want a chair for every butt. And a few extra chairs should the butts not want to sit by each other." So we have 173 in the audience? tables? and we're doing 24 tables seating 8 each. No seating chart. So there are 2 extra tables to accommodate those that don't fill. 

I've actually only been to one wedding where the tables were assigned and it was terrible. I was not a fan, at all. And the friends I've spoken to are not fans of it either. It's helpful though that we frequently have parties so 95% of our guest list knows each other or at least has met each other.

It's great that no seating chart will work for you but most weddings would be better served with a seating chart/table assignments. It's pretty unusual in my experience for people to know each other that well and weddings I've gone to without some kind of assigned table have been less enjoyable than those where I was seated with people I knew or had something in common with. 

In our case we have people who CANNOT be near each other. Also, I don't think any of the tables are "bad" but I do want to make sure that, for example, my grandmother is not right next to the DJ. 

I've never been to a wedding where there was a seating chart.  Everything worked out fine. I disagree with the bolded. I think it's a case of knowing your circle.

Our wedding would be a mess without a seating chart. FI's mom's side apparently does not know his dad's side at all. Our different friend groups (high school, college, etc) don't know each other at all. Some of my dad's relatives don't know some of my mom's relatives. And we're not doing any sort of head table or sweetheart table; we're just sitting right in the middle of all the guests with the WP, but I wanted to make sure they each got to sit next to their SOs. 

I've been to weddings with this type of situation, with no seating chart. Some tables fill up fast and then 1 or 2 people from that friend group don't have a seat, so they snag a chair from another table or end up being stuck sitting with strangers. Or there's 3 people in a friend group so they go take over their own table, with 5 empty chairs, while a group of 6 goes and takes over another table but there aren't 2 strays to fill it in, and son on. It just gets confusing. 

plainjane0415

novella1186 said:

plainjane0415 said:

badbnagdway said:

mikenberger said:

badbnagdway said:

Have you guys done your seating charts and room plans yet? 

Someone on these boards once said a seating chart is like a jigsaw puzzle, but with emotions. They could not be more right. The nightmare people for me are FI's mom and sister. They surely would like to sit together, but no one else in FI's family would want to sit with FI's mom. They have SO's but they won't tell me if they're bringing them. Therefore they are an undefined number of pieces that just won't fit anywhere. 

We just did our room plan last night with our venue coordinator and DOC. Well, they did it and told me why they made their choices and I wrote a check. I honesty don't care. My words were "I want a chair for every butt. And a few extra chairs should the butts not want to sit by each other." So we have 173 in the audience? tables? and we're doing 24 tables seating 8 each. No seating chart. So there are 2 extra tables to accommodate those that don't fill. 

I've actually only been to one wedding where the tables were assigned and it was terrible. I was not a fan, at all. And the friends I've spoken to are not fans of it either. It's helpful though that we frequently have parties so 95% of our guest list knows each other or at least has met each other.

It's great that no seating chart will work for you but most weddings would be better served with a seating chart/table assignments. It's pretty unusual in my experience for people to know each other that well and weddings I've gone to without some kind of assigned table have been less enjoyable than those where I was seated with people I knew or had something in common with. 

In our case we have people who CANNOT be near each other. Also, I don't think any of the tables are "bad" but I do want to make sure that, for example, my grandmother is not right next to the DJ. 

I've never been to a wedding where there was a seating chart.  Everything worked out fine. I disagree with the bolded. I think it's a case of knowing your circle.

Our wedding would be a mess without a seating chart. FI's mom's side apparently does not know his dad's side at all. Our different friend groups (high school, college, etc) don't know each other at all. Some of my dad's relatives don't know some of my mom's relatives. And we're not doing any sort of head table or sweetheart table; we're just sitting right in the middle of all the guests with the WP, but I wanted to make sure they each got to sit next to their SOs. 

I've been to weddings with this type of situation, with no seating chart. Some tables fill up fast and then 1 or 2 people from that friend group don't have a seat, so they snag a chair from another table or end up being stuck sitting with strangers. Or there's 3 people in a friend group so they go take over their own table, with 5 empty chairs, while a group of 6 goes and takes over another table but there aren't 2 strays to fill it in, and son on. It just gets confusing. 

Typically with the weddings I've been to sans seating charts, people just fill up the tables.  Sure, you may have a table that's completely full of a friend or relative group, and one table that has maybe two empty chairs or something, but all in all I've never really heard anyone complain about it.

FI and I try to find seats with our friends, but we have been in a situation before where we had to sit with people we didn't really know before, and it wasn't that bad.  We really just sat to eat, and then the rest of the night we are up talking, drinking, dancing, etc.. But, I know that doesn't work for everyone.

novella1186

plainjane0415 said:

novella1186 said:

plainjane0415 said:

badbnagdway said:

mikenberger said:

badbnagdway said:

Have you guys done your seating charts and room plans yet? 

Someone on these boards once said a seating chart is like a jigsaw puzzle, but with emotions. They could not be more right. The nightmare people for me are FI's mom and sister. They surely would like to sit together, but no one else in FI's family would want to sit with FI's mom. They have SO's but they won't tell me if they're bringing them. Therefore they are an undefined number of pieces that just won't fit anywhere. 

We just did our room plan last night with our venue coordinator and DOC. Well, they did it and told me why they made their choices and I wrote a check. I honesty don't care. My words were "I want a chair for every butt. And a few extra chairs should the butts not want to sit by each other." So we have 173 in the audience? tables? and we're doing 24 tables seating 8 each. No seating chart. So there are 2 extra tables to accommodate those that don't fill. 

I've actually only been to one wedding where the tables were assigned and it was terrible. I was not a fan, at all. And the friends I've spoken to are not fans of it either. It's helpful though that we frequently have parties so 95% of our guest list knows each other or at least has met each other.

It's great that no seating chart will work for you but most weddings would be better served with a seating chart/table assignments. It's pretty unusual in my experience for people to know each other that well and weddings I've gone to without some kind of assigned table have been less enjoyable than those where I was seated with people I knew or had something in common with. 

In our case we have people who CANNOT be near each other. Also, I don't think any of the tables are "bad" but I do want to make sure that, for example, my grandmother is not right next to the DJ. 

I've never been to a wedding where there was a seating chart.  Everything worked out fine. I disagree with the bolded. I think it's a case of knowing your circle.

Our wedding would be a mess without a seating chart. FI's mom's side apparently does not know his dad's side at all. Our different friend groups (high school, college, etc) don't know each other at all. Some of my dad's relatives don't know some of my mom's relatives. And we're not doing any sort of head table or sweetheart table; we're just sitting right in the middle of all the guests with the WP, but I wanted to make sure they each got to sit next to their SOs. 

I've been to weddings with this type of situation, with no seating chart. Some tables fill up fast and then 1 or 2 people from that friend group don't have a seat, so they snag a chair from another table or end up being stuck sitting with strangers. Or there's 3 people in a friend group so they go take over their own table, with 5 empty chairs, while a group of 6 goes and takes over another table but there aren't 2 strays to fill it in, and son on. It just gets confusing. 

Typically with the weddings I've been to sans seating charts, people just fill up the tables.  Sure, you may have a table that's completely full of a friend or relative group, and one table that has maybe two empty chairs or something, but all in all I've never really heard anyone complain about it.

FI and I try to find seats with our friends, but we have been in a situation before where we had to sit with people we didn't really know before, and it wasn't that bad.  We really just sat to eat, and then the rest of the night we are up talking, drinking, dancing, etc.. But, I know that doesn't work for everyone.

For some reason this just reminded me of the wedding of FI's friend that we went to a while back. It had assigned tables. Brad and his date were put at a table in the back corner, alone lol. I guess the other people that were supposed to be at that table were all related and ended up not being able to come at the last minute or something. It was kind of funny but really awkward at the same time. But it's Brad so... whatever. lol 

mikenberger

novella1186 said:

plainjane0415 said:

novella1186 said:

plainjane0415 said:

badbnagdway said:

mikenberger said:

badbnagdway said:

Have you guys done your seating charts and room plans yet? 

Someone on these boards once said a seating chart is like a jigsaw puzzle, but with emotions. They could not be more right. The nightmare people for me are FI's mom and sister. They surely would like to sit together, but no one else in FI's family would want to sit with FI's mom. They have SO's but they won't tell me if they're bringing them. Therefore they are an undefined number of pieces that just won't fit anywhere. 

We just did our room plan last night with our venue coordinator and DOC. Well, they did it and told me why they made their choices and I wrote a check. I honesty don't care. My words were "I want a chair for every butt. And a few extra chairs should the butts not want to sit by each other." So we have 173 in the audience? tables? and we're doing 24 tables seating 8 each. No seating chart. So there are 2 extra tables to accommodate those that don't fill. 

I've actually only been to one wedding where the tables were assigned and it was terrible. I was not a fan, at all. And the friends I've spoken to are not fans of it either. It's helpful though that we frequently have parties so 95% of our guest list knows each other or at least has met each other.

It's great that no seating chart will work for you but most weddings would be better served with a seating chart/table assignments. It's pretty unusual in my experience for people to know each other that well and weddings I've gone to without some kind of assigned table have been less enjoyable than those where I was seated with people I knew or had something in common with. 

In our case we have people who CANNOT be near each other. Also, I don't think any of the tables are "bad" but I do want to make sure that, for example, my grandmother is not right next to the DJ. 

I've never been to a wedding where there was a seating chart.  Everything worked out fine. I disagree with the bolded. I think it's a case of knowing your circle.

Our wedding would be a mess without a seating chart. FI's mom's side apparently does not know his dad's side at all. Our different friend groups (high school, college, etc) don't know each other at all. Some of my dad's relatives don't know some of my mom's relatives. And we're not doing any sort of head table or sweetheart table; we're just sitting right in the middle of all the guests with the WP, but I wanted to make sure they each got to sit next to their SOs. 

I've been to weddings with this type of situation, with no seating chart. Some tables fill up fast and then 1 or 2 people from that friend group don't have a seat, so they snag a chair from another table or end up being stuck sitting with strangers. Or there's 3 people in a friend group so they go take over their own table, with 5 empty chairs, while a group of 6 goes and takes over another table but there aren't 2 strays to fill it in, and son on. It just gets confusing. 

Typically with the weddings I've been to sans seating charts, people just fill up the tables.  Sure, you may have a table that's completely full of a friend or relative group, and one table that has maybe two empty chairs or something, but all in all I've never really heard anyone complain about it.

FI and I try to find seats with our friends, but we have been in a situation before where we had to sit with people we didn't really know before, and it wasn't that bad.  We really just sat to eat, and then the rest of the night we are up talking, drinking, dancing, etc.. But, I know that doesn't work for everyone.

For some reason this just reminded me of the wedding of FI's friend that we went to a while back. It had assigned tables. Brad and his date were put at a table in the back corner, alone lol. I guess the other people that were supposed to be at that table were all related and ended up not being able to come at the last minute or something. It was kind of funny but really awkward at the same time. But it's Brad so... whatever. lol 

They heard they were going to sit with Brad. And promptly canceled their trip. #blamebrad

plainjane0415

novella1186 said:

plainjane0415 said:

novella1186 said:

plainjane0415 said:

badbnagdway said:

mikenberger said:

badbnagdway said:

Have you guys done your seating charts and room plans yet? 

Someone on these boards once said a seating chart is like a jigsaw puzzle, but with emotions. They could not be more right. The nightmare people for me are FI's mom and sister. They surely would like to sit together, but no one else in FI's family would want to sit with FI's mom. They have SO's but they won't tell me if they're bringing them. Therefore they are an undefined number of pieces that just won't fit anywhere. 

We just did our room plan last night with our venue coordinator and DOC. Well, they did it and told me why they made their choices and I wrote a check. I honesty don't care. My words were "I want a chair for every butt. And a few extra chairs should the butts not want to sit by each other." So we have 173 in the audience? tables? and we're doing 24 tables seating 8 each. No seating chart. So there are 2 extra tables to accommodate those that don't fill. 

I've actually only been to one wedding where the tables were assigned and it was terrible. I was not a fan, at all. And the friends I've spoken to are not fans of it either. It's helpful though that we frequently have parties so 95% of our guest list knows each other or at least has met each other.

It's great that no seating chart will work for you but most weddings would be better served with a seating chart/table assignments. It's pretty unusual in my experience for people to know each other that well and weddings I've gone to without some kind of assigned table have been less enjoyable than those where I was seated with people I knew or had something in common with. 

In our case we have people who CANNOT be near each other. Also, I don't think any of the tables are "bad" but I do want to make sure that, for example, my grandmother is not right next to the DJ. 

I've never been to a wedding where there was a seating chart.  Everything worked out fine. I disagree with the bolded. I think it's a case of knowing your circle.

Our wedding would be a mess without a seating chart. FI's mom's side apparently does not know his dad's side at all. Our different friend groups (high school, college, etc) don't know each other at all. Some of my dad's relatives don't know some of my mom's relatives. And we're not doing any sort of head table or sweetheart table; we're just sitting right in the middle of all the guests with the WP, but I wanted to make sure they each got to sit next to their SOs. 

I've been to weddings with this type of situation, with no seating chart. Some tables fill up fast and then 1 or 2 people from that friend group don't have a seat, so they snag a chair from another table or end up being stuck sitting with strangers. Or there's 3 people in a friend group so they go take over their own table, with 5 empty chairs, while a group of 6 goes and takes over another table but there aren't 2 strays to fill it in, and son on. It just gets confusing. 

Typically with the weddings I've been to sans seating charts, people just fill up the tables.  Sure, you may have a table that's completely full of a friend or relative group, and one table that has maybe two empty chairs or something, but all in all I've never really heard anyone complain about it.

FI and I try to find seats with our friends, but we have been in a situation before where we had to sit with people we didn't really know before, and it wasn't that bad.  We really just sat to eat, and then the rest of the night we are up talking, drinking, dancing, etc.. But, I know that doesn't work for everyone.

For some reason this just reminded me of the wedding of FI's friend that we went to a while back. It had assigned tables. Brad and his date were put at a table in the back corner, alone lol. I guess the other people that were supposed to be at that table were all related and ended up not being able to come at the last minute or something. It was kind of funny but really awkward at the same time. But it's Brad so... whatever. lol 

Or maybe it was intentional?  bwahahaha