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Ballet dancers and african dancers at the reception? AW or not?

I really want some good entertainment at the wedding reception because I think it makes it more fun. I was considering hiring ballet dancers. There is a company that provides ballerinas to do a short performance, they then welcome the B & G onto the dance floor. They dance around the B & G while we would do the first dance. This lasts 8 minutes in total and the first dance will happen after the meal. I am considering getting african dancers to come out directly after the ballerinas to get the party started! I think the african routine lasts 15 minutes. The african dancers then encourage the guests to dance and dance with the guests. Would anyone find this too much to sit through as a guest?
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Re: Ballet dancers and african dancers at the reception? AW or not?

  • AddieCake said:
    Yes, I would find that too much to sit through. 
    Should I stick with one or the other? Maybe I am trying to cram too much stuff in! lol :smiley:
  • edited December 2016
    eileenrob said:
    Max_G said:
    I really want some good entertainment at the wedding reception because I think it makes it more fun. I was considering hiring ballet dancers. There is a company that provides ballerinas to do a short performance, they then welcome the B & G onto the dance floor. They dance around the B & G while we would do the first dance. This lasts 8 minutes in total and the first dance will happen after the meal. I am considering getting african dancers to come out directly after the ballerinas to get the party started! I think the african routine lasts 15 minutes. The african dancers then encourage the guests to dance and dance with the guests. Would anyone find this too much to sit through as a guest?
    Yeah, 23 minutes is too long to have guests watch something.  Haven't they just watched a wedding ceremony? If you're set on having both, maybe have the ballerinas during dinner, when everyone is sitting down anyway and music is low,  and then have the African dancers add spark to the dance floor while all the guests are already up dancing? (Like dancing alongside the guests, not taking up the dance floor doing a choreographed routine.)  

    Though as a guest, I'd notice if any aspect of food or drinks wasn't top notch if there were two separate live performances, feeling irked that budget was poorly allocated.  NOT saying you're doing this, just sharing a personal feeling.
    What do you mean by 'top notch?' I'm having a full open bar with a variety of drinks and lots of food during the cocktail hour and a large buffet for the main lunch with dessert. Do I have to serve the most expensive champagne/wine in the country to justify having additional entertainment? In the UK, the first dance is normally done after the meal. So by the time the dancers come out everyone would have had eaten, heard some very short toasts and seen a quick cake cutting. Most British weddings I have attended, do all the normal wedding activities after the meal so they are out of the way before the dancing starts.
  • CMGragain said:
    Max_G said:
    I really want some good entertainment at the wedding reception because I think it makes it more fun. I was considering hiring ballet dancers. There is a company that provides ballerinas to do a short performance, they then welcome the B & G onto the dance floor. They dance around the B & G while we would do the first dance. This lasts 8 minutes in total and the first dance will happen after the meal. I am considering getting african dancers to come out directly after the ballerinas to get the party started! I think the african routine lasts 15 minutes. The african dancers then encourage the guests to dance and dance with the guests. Would anyone find this too much to sit through as a guest?
    The African dancer idea does not bother me, but the idea of having ballet dancers dancing around you while you do your first dance is way too attention seeking, IMHO.  I would find this really weird, and wonder why you thought you needed the extra attention.  Isn't having a spotlight dance enough for you?
    I just thought the ballerinas made the first dance look really pretty:
  • Anybody else suspicious about this post.  It just doesn't seem real to me.
    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
    MesmrEwe
  • edited December 2016
    CMGragain said:
    Anybody else suspicious about this post.  It just doesn't seem real to me.
    How is it not real? Have you never heard of entertainment at weddings? Most weddings I have attended tend to drag on to long and become progressively more dull. I want my wedding to be fun and entertainment helps to make it more interesting and fun for everyone including me. I'm also having flair bartenders during the cocktail hour as well. Just because you may not have seen a wedding like this, doesn't mean it can't happen. My budget is quite large (well large from my pov) and I want to spend it in a way that enhances the guests, my enjoyment and my FI's enjoyment! Why is that so hard to understand?
  • CMGragainCMGragain member
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 25 Answers
    edited December 2016
    Max_G said:
    CMGragain said:
    Anybody else suspicious about this post.  It just doesn't seem real to me.
    How is it not real? Have you never heard of entertainment at weddings? Most weddings I have attended tend to drag on to long and become progressively more dull. I want my wedding to be fun and entertainment helps to make it more interesting and fun for everyone including me. I'm also having flair bartenders during the cocktail hour as well. Just because you may not have seen a wedding like this, doesn't mean it can't happen. My budget is quite large and I want to spend it in a way that enhances the guests, my enjoyment and my FI's enjoyment! Why is that so hard to understand?
    I'm calling troll.  OP asked for an opinion on a controversial idea, and then becomes defensive when people give good advice.
    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
  • CMGragainCMGragain member
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 25 Answers
    edited December 2016
    CMGragain said:
    Max_G said:
    CMGragain said:
    Anybody else suspicious about this post.  It just doesn't seem real to me.
    How is it not real? Have you never heard of entertainment at weddings? Most weddings I have attended tend to drag on to long and become progressively more dull. I want my wedding to be fun and entertainment helps to make it more interesting and fun for everyone including me. I'm also having flair bartenders during the cocktail hour as well. Just because you may not have seen a wedding like this, doesn't mean it can't happen. My budget is quite large and I want to spend it in a way that enhances the guests, my enjoyment and my FI's enjoyment! Why is that so hard to understand?
    Nope.  I have seen more than 100 weddings.
    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
    PrettyGirlLost
  • eileenrob said:
    Max_G said:
    eileenrob said:
    Max_G said:
    I really want some good entertainment at the wedding reception because I think it makes it more fun. I was considering hiring ballet dancers. There is a company that provides ballerinas to do a short performance, they then welcome the B & G onto the dance floor. They dance around the B & G while we would do the first dance. This lasts 8 minutes in total and the first dance will happen after the meal. I am considering getting african dancers to come out directly after the ballerinas to get the party started! I think the african routine lasts 15 minutes. The african dancers then encourage the guests to dance and dance with the guests. Would anyone find this too much to sit through as a guest?
    Yeah, 23 minutes is too long to have guests watch something.  Haven't they just watched a wedding ceremony? If you're set on having both, maybe have the ballerinas during dinner, when everyone is sitting down anyway and music is low,  and then have the African dancers add spark to the dance floor while all the guests are already up dancing? (Like dancing alongside the guests, not taking up the dance floor doing a choreographed routine.)  

    Though as a guest, I'd notice if any aspect of food or drinks wasn't top notch if there were two separate live performances, feeling irked that budget was poorly allocated.  NOT saying you're doing this, just sharing a personal feeling.
    What do you mean by 'top notch?' I'm having a full open bar with a variety of drinks and lots of food during the cocktail hour and a large buffet for the main lunch with dessert. Do I have to serve the most expensive champagne/wine in the country to justify having additional entertainment? In the UK, the first dance is normally done after the meal. So by the time the dancers come out everyone would have had eaten, heard some very short toasts and seen a quick cake cutting. Most British weddings I have attended, do all the normal wedding activities after the meal so they are out of the way before the dancing starts.
    You don't have to be defensive.  A full open bar and plenty to eat is what I meant, so you're good in my eyes (for whatever that's worth to you...apparently a lot  :|)
    I don't know much about British weddings- I can definitely weigh in on Irish/Italian New York weddings- have plenty to eat and drink, allow guests to enjoy each other's company, great DJ/band, and you're set. If I want to watch a performance, I'll go to a show.  But as I'd said in my first response, if there has to be entertainment, have it while guests are eating so it doesn't cut into their socializing/dance time. 
    Sorry if I came across as defensive. I think I may cut one of the dancing groups because 20+ mins does seem like a long time when I read the other responses. I want some kind of entertainment because British people are the most reluctant people to get on the dancefloor, (in my opinion)! They want to dance but they spend a lot of time eyeing the dancefloor until they have drunk A LOT! I thought dancers would be a good way to get them up and dancing because someone else is taking the lead.
  • edited December 2016
    @CMGragain Hmmm........

    What's controversial about wedding entertainment? Also I haven't been defensive about any suggestions given. I was only slightly defensive about the top-notch comment. I'll admit that. The rest you are just making up to stir the pot.
    j.jpg 34.9K
  • Max_G said:
    eileenrob said:
    Max_G said:
    eileenrob said:
    Max_G said:
    I really want some good entertainment at the wedding reception because I think it makes it more fun. I was considering hiring ballet dancers. There is a company that provides ballerinas to do a short performance, they then welcome the B & G onto the dance floor. They dance around the B & G while we would do the first dance. This lasts 8 minutes in total and the first dance will happen after the meal. I am considering getting african dancers to come out directly after the ballerinas to get the party started! I think the african routine lasts 15 minutes. The african dancers then encourage the guests to dance and dance with the guests. Would anyone find this too much to sit through as a guest?
    Yeah, 23 minutes is too long to have guests watch something.  Haven't they just watched a wedding ceremony? If you're set on having both, maybe have the ballerinas during dinner, when everyone is sitting down anyway and music is low,  and then have the African dancers add spark to the dance floor while all the guests are already up dancing? (Like dancing alongside the guests, not taking up the dance floor doing a choreographed routine.)  

    Though as a guest, I'd notice if any aspect of food or drinks wasn't top notch if there were two separate live performances, feeling irked that budget was poorly allocated.  NOT saying you're doing this, just sharing a personal feeling.
    What do you mean by 'top notch?' I'm having a full open bar with a variety of drinks and lots of food during the cocktail hour and a large buffet for the main lunch with dessert. Do I have to serve the most expensive champagne/wine in the country to justify having additional entertainment? In the UK, the first dance is normally done after the meal. So by the time the dancers come out everyone would have had eaten, heard some very short toasts and seen a quick cake cutting. Most British weddings I have attended, do all the normal wedding activities after the meal so they are out of the way before the dancing starts.
    You don't have to be defensive.  A full open bar and plenty to eat is what I meant, so you're good in my eyes (for whatever that's worth to you...apparently a lot  :|)
    I don't know much about British weddings- I can definitely weigh in on Irish/Italian New York weddings- have plenty to eat and drink, allow guests to enjoy each other's company, great DJ/band, and you're set. If I want to watch a performance, I'll go to a show.  But as I'd said in my first response, if there has to be entertainment, have it while guests are eating so it doesn't cut into their socializing/dance time. 
    Sorry if I came across as defensive. I think I may cut one of the dancing groups because 20+ mins does seem like a long time when I read the other responses. I want some kind of entertainment because British people are the most reluctant people to get on the dancefloor, (in my opinion)! They want to dance but they spend a lot of time eyeing the dancefloor until they have drunk A LOT! I thought dancers would be a good way to get them up and dancing because someone else is taking the lead.
    That's fine- sorry if you felt attacked.  You know your crowd better than anyone.  I have some family members that need to have a LOT to drink before they hit the dance floor, but eventually other family members can get them up.  In your group, if it'll take dancers, then so be it.  I would try to keep the professional entertainment to 5 minutes, tops.
  • edited December 2016
    eileenrob said:
    Max_G said:
    eileenrob said:
    Max_G said:
    eileenrob said:
    Max_G said:
    I really want some good entertainment at the wedding reception because I think it makes it more fun. I was considering hiring ballet dancers. There is a company that provides ballerinas to do a short performance, they then welcome the B & G onto the dance floor. They dance around the B & G while we would do the first dance. This lasts 8 minutes in total and the first dance will happen after the meal. I am considering getting african dancers to come out directly after the ballerinas to get the party started! I think the african routine lasts 15 minutes. The african dancers then encourage the guests to dance and dance with the guests. Would anyone find this too much to sit through as a guest?
    Yeah, 23 minutes is too long to have guests watch something.  Haven't they just watched a wedding ceremony? If you're set on having both, maybe have the ballerinas during dinner, when everyone is sitting down anyway and music is low,  and then have the African dancers add spark to the dance floor while all the guests are already up dancing? (Like dancing alongside the guests, not taking up the dance floor doing a choreographed routine.)  

    Though as a guest, I'd notice if any aspect of food or drinks wasn't top notch if there were two separate live performances, feeling irked that budget was poorly allocated.  NOT saying you're doing this, just sharing a personal feeling.
    What do you mean by 'top notch?' I'm having a full open bar with a variety of drinks and lots of food during the cocktail hour and a large buffet for the main lunch with dessert. Do I have to serve the most expensive champagne/wine in the country to justify having additional entertainment? In the UK, the first dance is normally done after the meal. So by the time the dancers come out everyone would have had eaten, heard some very short toasts and seen a quick cake cutting. Most British weddings I have attended, do all the normal wedding activities after the meal so they are out of the way before the dancing starts.
    You don't have to be defensive.  A full open bar and plenty to eat is what I meant, so you're good in my eyes (for whatever that's worth to you...apparently a lot  :|)
    I don't know much about British weddings- I can definitely weigh in on Irish/Italian New York weddings- have plenty to eat and drink, allow guests to enjoy each other's company, great DJ/band, and you're set. If I want to watch a performance, I'll go to a show.  But as I'd said in my first response, if there has to be entertainment, have it while guests are eating so it doesn't cut into their socializing/dance time. 
    Sorry if I came across as defensive. I think I may cut one of the dancing groups because 20+ mins does seem like a long time when I read the other responses. I want some kind of entertainment because British people are the most reluctant people to get on the dancefloor, (in my opinion)! They want to dance but they spend a lot of time eyeing the dancefloor until they have drunk A LOT! I thought dancers would be a good way to get them up and dancing because someone else is taking the lead.
    That's fine- sorry if you felt attacked.  You know your crowd better than anyone.  I have some family members that need to have a LOT to drink before they hit the dance floor, but eventually other family members can get them up.  In your group, if it'll take dancers, then so be it.  I would try to keep the professional entertainment to 5 minutes, tops.
    Yeah, I'm going a bit wedding crazy! I'm trying to cram way to many things into one day because I'm scared of it being boring. Yeah, two performances are a bit much. My FI keeps telling me to calm down because when I see something I immediately want to incorporate it! I'm like a little kid. I'll probably leave the ballet dancers since the african dancers are more important and I'll ask for a shorter performance. Even my DJ said getting English people to dance can be a bit of mission sometimes because of this collective feeling of embarrassment people tend to get unless they are drunk! lol I just want people to feel relaxed and I hope if they see others dancing, they will feel less self-conscious.
  • Max_G said:
    eileenrob said:
    Max_G said:
    eileenrob said:
    Max_G said:
    eileenrob said:
    Max_G said:
    I really want some good entertainment at the wedding reception because I think it makes it more fun. I was considering hiring ballet dancers. There is a company that provides ballerinas to do a short performance, they then welcome the B & G onto the dance floor. They dance around the B & G while we would do the first dance. This lasts 8 minutes in total and the first dance will happen after the meal. I am considering getting african dancers to come out directly after the ballerinas to get the party started! I think the african routine lasts 15 minutes. The african dancers then encourage the guests to dance and dance with the guests. Would anyone find this too much to sit through as a guest?
    Yeah, 23 minutes is too long to have guests watch something.  Haven't they just watched a wedding ceremony? If you're set on having both, maybe have the ballerinas during dinner, when everyone is sitting down anyway and music is low,  and then have the African dancers add spark to the dance floor while all the guests are already up dancing? (Like dancing alongside the guests, not taking up the dance floor doing a choreographed routine.)  

    Though as a guest, I'd notice if any aspect of food or drinks wasn't top notch if there were two separate live performances, feeling irked that budget was poorly allocated.  NOT saying you're doing this, just sharing a personal feeling.
    What do you mean by 'top notch?' I'm having a full open bar with a variety of drinks and lots of food during the cocktail hour and a large buffet for the main lunch with dessert. Do I have to serve the most expensive champagne/wine in the country to justify having additional entertainment? In the UK, the first dance is normally done after the meal. So by the time the dancers come out everyone would have had eaten, heard some very short toasts and seen a quick cake cutting. Most British weddings I have attended, do all the normal wedding activities after the meal so they are out of the way before the dancing starts.
    You don't have to be defensive.  A full open bar and plenty to eat is what I meant, so you're good in my eyes (for whatever that's worth to you...apparently a lot  :|)
    I don't know much about British weddings- I can definitely weigh in on Irish/Italian New York weddings- have plenty to eat and drink, allow guests to enjoy each other's company, great DJ/band, and you're set. If I want to watch a performance, I'll go to a show.  But as I'd said in my first response, if there has to be entertainment, have it while guests are eating so it doesn't cut into their socializing/dance time. 
    Sorry if I came across as defensive. I think I may cut one of the dancing groups because 20+ mins does seem like a long time when I read the other responses. I want some kind of entertainment because British people are the most reluctant people to get on the dancefloor, (in my opinion)! They want to dance but they spend a lot of time eyeing the dancefloor until they have drunk A LOT! I thought dancers would be a good way to get them up and dancing because someone else is taking the lead.
    That's fine- sorry if you felt attacked.  You know your crowd better than anyone.  I have some family members that need to have a LOT to drink before they hit the dance floor, but eventually other family members can get them up.  In your group, if it'll take dancers, then so be it.  I would try to keep the professional entertainment to 5 minutes, tops.
    Yeah, I'm going a bit wedding crazy! I'm trying to cram way to many things into one day because I'm scared of it being boring. Yeah, two performances are a bit much. My FI keeps telling me to calm down because when I see something I immediately want to incorporate it! I'm like a little kid. I'll probably leave the ballet dancers since the african dancers are more important and I'll ask for a shorter performance. Even my DJ said getting English people to dance can be a bit of mission sometimes because of this collective feeling of embarrassment people tend to get unless they are drunk! lol I just want people to feel relaxed and I hope if they see others dancing, they will feel less self-conscious.
    Less is more.  If you have the budget to spare, it may be tempting to add more, but at the end of the day it'll just be more to coordinate and worry about going smoothly (if you're the worrying type). Hmm...your crowd may benefit from a group dance to open the dance floor.  In my family it's the tarantella, but think about the hora, the Greek kalamatiano...you could YouTube them if you don't know them, but just something that encourages everyone (in a fun, non threatening way) up onto the floor.  Once they're up, if the DJ is good and can read the crowd, they'll stay up (or most of them will hopefully). 
    charlotte989875SP29cowgirl8238
  • Max_G said:
    @CMGragain Hmmm........

    What's controversial about wedding entertainment? Also I haven't been defensive about any suggestions given. I was only slightly defensive about the top-notch comment. I'll admit that. The rest you are just making up to stir the pot.
    OK, I'm convinced you are real.
    A wedding needs a couple who can legally be married, an officiant, a license, and legal witnesses.  If you want guests, you need to provide food and drink for your reception after the ceremony to thank your guests for coming.  (Wedding breakfast)
    Anything else is completely optional.  The majority of weddings here in the USA are more elaborate, but many are not.  100 years ago, elaborate weddings were considered to be in bad taste.  That has completely changed.
    The ceremony focuses on the couple.  The guests witness them exchange vows.
    The reception focuses on the guests and their comfort.  There are all kinds of traditions, but none are necessary.  Many are becoming passe, such as the garter toss, the bouquet toss, etc., but they are still done.
    The reception is for your guests to socialize and enjoy the company.  They should never be treated as a captive audience.  It is polite to do the cake cutting early, so that guests are free to leave early if they wish.  (Older guests and single people may not be interested in dancing.)
    Wedding "entertainment" is not done here in the USA.  This doesn't mean that special touches cannot be added to enhance the ceremony and reception.  I once saw a beautiful, simple wedding where the ceremony music was provided by a professional boychoir.  Receptions can be enhanced with live music and special food and drink.
    You are asking to add events to the reception.  The reception is not a stage show.  You should focus on your wedding, not on entertainment.
    I absolutely think the ballet idea is AW and over the top.  The African dancers are more acceptable.  Remember, your guests are not REQUIRED to dance, or to do anything other than witness your ceremony, and behave politely at your reception.

    httpiimgurcomTCCjW0wjpg
  • Keisha84Keisha84 member
    Third Anniversary 100 Love Its 10 Comments First Answer
    edited December 2016
    Are they doing traditional or modern African dance? Shorten the performance to 5 min and have the stay on the dance floor for the other ten minutes to keep guests on the floor. 15 minutes is way too long to watch a performance. And if they are dancing through all the good songs as a guest I would be annoyed. 

    I personally wouldn't mind seeing professional dancers at a wedding. Especially dancers relevant to ones culture. The ballet dancers are very nice but unless you have a known liking of ballet, I would wonder why you threw them in there 

    Edited for spelling 
    charlotte989875SP29InLoveInQueenscowgirl8238
  • Put that money towards booze.
    OP has stated she is having a full open bar. I think this is extra funds she has after sufficiently hosting her guests. 
    SP29
  • I'd skip the ballerina's.

    However, are the African dancers related to your or your FI's cultures?  (I can't remember 100% but you're hosting an African/Caribeean/English wedding, right?)

    If they're tied culturally, it could be cool if done right.  If not, I think I'd skip them too and put that towards something else.  
    Yah I was just going to ask the same thing.  Are you African, or is your FI? If not I would be very cautious to not appropriate another culture that neither your nor your FI belong to. If you do then sure, if it's not a long performance and all other aspects of the wedding are  hosted well(and I agree with the PP who sail you should have a top shelf open bar and quality food). 

    I love dancing. I dance at all weddings it does not take much to get me to a dance floor. My H needs to be persuaded, cajoled, and pushed to dance, and even then it's a slow song and over quickly. Sometimes the dance party is more about your crowd than it is the music and atmosphere. 
    SP29sparklepants41cowgirl8238
  • Max_G said:
    I really want some good entertainment at the wedding reception because I think it makes it more fun. I was considering hiring ballet dancers. There is a company that provides ballerinas to do a short performance, they then welcome the B & G onto the dance floor. They dance around the B & G while we would do the first dance. This lasts 8 minutes in total and the first dance will happen after the meal. I am considering getting african dancers to come out directly after the ballerinas to get the party started! I think the african routine lasts 15 minutes. The african dancers then encourage the guests to dance and dance with the guests. Would anyone find this too much to sit through as a guest?
    If I wanted to see a dance performance I'd buy tickets to an actual ballet. 
    InLoveInQueensPrettyGirlLostcowgirl8238
  • Jen4948Jen4948 Houston member
    10000 Comments Seventh Anniversary 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    edited December 2016
    What's "controversial" about your choices of "entertainment" at your wedding reception is that you're forgetting about the purpose of the reception.

    Its purpose is not to "honor" or "glorify" you and your FI. You are not royalty (I assume) and your wedding is not your coronation. The purpose of a wedding reception is to thank your guests for taking time and money out of their lives to attend your wedding ceremony. A certain amount of "traditional" activities, like a few spotlight dances, one or two short toasts, and a cake-cutting are okay and expected, but unless your guests come from a culture where ballet is performed at a wedding reception, nobody is going to be "entertained, " let alone thanked, by watching choreographed performances. For this same reason, we also advise against slideshows, videos, and any other activities where audience attention, but not active participation, is demanded.

    In other words, let the guests do their own dancing by way of entertaining them instead of hiding anyone to do it for them.
    STARMOON44knottiejcowgirl8238
  • LondonLisaLondonLisa London, UK member
    Seventh Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Are you or your fi from the same African culture that these dancers are from? I wouldn't find it strange at all if it was celebrating your culture (My Indian friends have had Bollywood dancers, Caribbean friends have had carnival dancers etc). However, It would seem a bit random and odd if you have no ties to that culture. Maybe have the African dancers as a surprise after the dance floor has been open for an hour or so. 

    However, ballet dancers during your first dance seems really awkward and uncomfortable for guests. I know I would be thinking WTF?! 
    SP29MairePoppylizybeffcowgirl8238
  • Hi Max, (((waves))).  IMO, sorry I would totally cringe at ballet dancers for the first dance, but think the African dancers were awesome.  Hope this helps xx
    MairePoppyInLoveInQueens
  • I agree with PPs. If your/FI culture is African, than the African dancers would be ok. Ballet- no, very AWish. I have never been to a British wedding but have never seen entertainment at a wedding in the US. I would be annoyed that I have to sit and watch and not be able to talk to people if the performance was more than a few minutes.
  • Every time I go to a wedding I am itching to get on the dance floor.  I would be bored waiting through toasts and all of these dances and would be super annoyed, because during that time I'm stuck in my seat and can't really talk to anyone.  Absolutely no the the ballet dancers, but the African dancers, if kept to about 5 minutes or so, wouldn't be terrible.  If they weren't from your or FI's cultures though I would think it was super weird and random.
    PrettyGirlLost
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