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Etiquette

Ballet dancers and african dancers at the reception? AW or not?

2

Re: Ballet dancers and african dancers at the reception? AW or not?

  • MobKazMobKaz Chicago suburbs member
    Ninth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Jen4948 said:
    What's "controversial" about your choices of "entertainment at your wedding reception is that you're forgetting about the purpose of the reception.

    Its purpose is not to "honor" or "glorify" you and your FI. You are not royalty (I assume) and your wedding is not your coronation. The purpose of a wedding reception is to thank your guests for taking time and money out of their lives to attend your wedding ceremony. A certain amount of "traditional" activities, like a few spotlight dances, one or two short toasts, and a cake-cutting are okay and expected, but unless your guests come from a culture where ballet is performed at a wedding reception, nobody is going to be "entertained, " let alone thanked, by watching choreographed performances. For this same reason, we also advise against slideshows, videos, and any other activities where audience attention, but not active participation, is demanded.

    In other words, let the guests do their own dancing by way of entertaining them instead of hiding anyone to do it for them.
    I'm not sure whether it was a euphemism, but OP did say in another post that she is marrying a "prince".  I believe the crowd expected is estimated at 400 "close friends and family".  Open seating.  No RSVP's.
  • holyguacamole79holyguacamole79 a taco truck in Houston member
    5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Keisha84 said: 
    Put that money towards booze.
    OP has stated she is having a full open bar. I think this is extra funds she has after sufficiently hosting her guests. 
    Then save the money for something else.   Id be bored AF.
    SwissMs
  • Keisha84 said: 
    Put that money towards booze.
    OP has stated she is having a full open bar. I think this is extra funds she has after sufficiently hosting her guests. 
    Then save the money for something else.   Id be bored AF.
    If it's part of her culture I dont think it's a waste. It is a know your crowd thing. I wouldn't be bored watching dancers doing the latest dance moves. It would get me ready to party. Maybe cause I know what she is talking about I'm ok with it. I can see where others would think they would bored with the dancers though
    SP29
  • I've been away and lurky for a while, but I felt compelled here. I've been to weddings with entertainment - I've even been to one with African dancers. It was boring, and a little strange, and it really shut the party down because you had to stop talking and enjoying people's company and pay attention to the dance floor.

    It was also really hard for many of the tables to see the African dancers. And that was a wedding with 200 people. So if you have 400, unless there's a stage or something, the people in the back are definitely going to be bored.

    I get what OP wants to do. I've seen it. I've just seen it have the opposite effect of "getting the party started". It tends to kill momentum


    InLoveInQueensPrettyGirlLostshort+sassy
  • holyguacamole79holyguacamole79 a taco truck in Houston member
    5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Keisha84 said:
    Keisha84 said: 
    Put that money towards booze.
    OP has stated she is having a full open bar. I think this is extra funds she has after sufficiently hosting her guests. 
    Then save the money for something else.   Id be bored AF.
    If it's part of her culture I dont think it's a waste. It is a know your crowd thing. I wouldn't be bored watching dancers doing the latest dance moves. It would get me ready to party. Maybe cause I know what she is talking about I'm ok with it. I can see where others would think they would bored with the dancers though
    To each her own.  I went to a wedding where the bride was Latina and had dancers perform a traditional Mexican dance.  The line at the bar during the performance was super long and nobody seemed to pay attention.
    PrettyGirlLost
  • I've been to one wedding where the guests were treated to a 'performance'. I enjoyed it but it was very short ~2 minutes and it was Irish dancers. Bride and Groom met while performing in a Irish dancing troop so it was a very personal touch. Keep it short and relevant to your culture/interests/history and I think it would be fine.
    ei34InLoveInQueensshort+sassycowgirl8238
  • Jen4948Jen4948 Houston member
    10000 Comments Seventh Anniversary 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    MobKaz said:
    Jen4948 said:
    What's "controversial" about your choices of "entertainment at your wedding reception is that you're forgetting about the purpose of the reception.

    Its purpose is not to "honor" or "glorify" you and your FI. You are not royalty (I assume) and your wedding is not your coronation. The purpose of a wedding reception is to thank your guests for taking time and money out of their lives to attend your wedding ceremony. A certain amount of "traditional" activities, like a few spotlight dances, one or two short toasts, and a cake-cutting are okay and expected, but unless your guests come from a culture where ballet is performed at a wedding reception, nobody is going to be "entertained, " let alone thanked, by watching choreographed performances. For this same reason, we also advise against slideshows, videos, and any other activities where audience attention, but not active participation, is demanded.

    In other words, let the guests do their own dancing by way of entertaining them instead of hiding anyone to do it for them.
    I'm not sure whether it was a euphemism, but OP did say in another post that she is marrying a "prince".  I believe the crowd expected is estimated at 400 "close friends and family".  Open seating.  No RSVP's.
    Huh. Didn't see the other post.

    Ok, if the wedding really is also supposed to be a big royal event, then if you really think your guests would be entertained by watching ballet or African dancers and it's consistent with cultural expectations and protocol, then I guess it's ok.

    But otherwise, I wouldn't go for it.
  • Ballet dancers are super AW-ish and unless you're a professional ballerina then I would find it odd.  No one wants to sit through long spotlight dances - having ballerinas there isn't going to change that.  A cute 90 seconds of dancing with your husband and everyone else is going to peace out and continue talking to their table mates.


    If the African dancers are culturally relevant, then go for it.  However, the only thing that gets me on the dance floor is plenty of booze and good music.  Having professional dancers out on the dance floor and joining them or going up to dance after them is only going to make me more self-conscious, not less, and make me less likely to dance.  If you're that concerned about people dancing, then you should be investing in a excellent DJ or band who knows how to read a crowd and pick music people like to dance to, not hiring professional dance troupes that will likely make your guests feel inadequate in their dancing skills.  Most of my friends are non-dancers (and we're not even British), but we'll all get up on the floor with enough booze and a kickass DJ.
    InLoveInQueensSaintPaulGal
  • The African Dancers if that's part of your culture could be fun - have them bring guests out and teach them moves as a twist IF (and only if) you've got the crowd for it.  Otherwise, add an extra protein, extra hot appetizer, have a larger slice of cake for your guests.  Ultimately - this idea goes under the "Know your crowd" for how they'll react...
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • I would find the ballet dancers very odd. I think the African dancers (if that is part of your or FI's culture) would be fun.

    Your reasoning for wanting the performances is to get people dancing. Unless your guests are going to get up and do ballet, I think the ballet dancers inappropriate. That is a very different style of dancing then the dancing that is going to happen at your wedding- it doesn't flow.

    Where as with the African dancers, I am imaging high energy dancing and music that I think would better translate to getting up on the dance floor with a group of people.

    Agreed to keep the performances short (5 mins or less). If you want to keep them out on the dance floor with your guests, that is another option.
    DrillSergeantCat
  • MobKazMobKaz Chicago suburbs member
    Ninth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Jen4948 said:
    MobKaz said:
    Jen4948 said:
    What's "controversial" about your choices of "entertainment at your wedding reception is that you're forgetting about the purpose of the reception.

    Its purpose is not to "honor" or "glorify" you and your FI. You are not royalty (I assume) and your wedding is not your coronation. The purpose of a wedding reception is to thank your guests for taking time and money out of their lives to attend your wedding ceremony. A certain amount of "traditional" activities, like a few spotlight dances, one or two short toasts, and a cake-cutting are okay and expected, but unless your guests come from a culture where ballet is performed at a wedding reception, nobody is going to be "entertained, " let alone thanked, by watching choreographed performances. For this same reason, we also advise against slideshows, videos, and any other activities where audience attention, but not active participation, is demanded.

    In other words, let the guests do their own dancing by way of entertaining them instead of hiding anyone to do it for them.
    I'm not sure whether it was a euphemism, but OP did say in another post that she is marrying a "prince".  I believe the crowd expected is estimated at 400 "close friends and family".  Open seating.  No RSVP's.
    Huh. Didn't see the other post.

    Ok, if the wedding really is also supposed to be a big royal event, then if you really think your guests would be entertained by watching ballet or African dancers and it's consistent with cultural expectations and protocol, then I guess it's ok.

    But otherwise, I wouldn't go for it.
    Apologies in advance if this is against TOS.  OP said in another post, "
    Long time lurker, first time poster.  I'm marrying my Nigerian/Scottish prince soon!"
    **Mods.....please delete if not appropropriate.
  • MairePoppyMairePoppy Connecticut mod
    Moderator Ninth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    edited January 2017
    Max_G said:
    Yeah, I'm going a bit wedding crazy! I'm trying to cram way to many things into one day because I'm scared of it being boring. Yeah, two performances are a bit much. My FI keeps telling me to calm down because when I see something I immediately want to incorporate it! I'm like a little kid. I'll probably leave the ballet dancers since the african dancers are more important and I'll ask for a shorter performance. Even my DJ said getting English people to dance can be a bit of mission sometimes because of this collective feeling of embarrassment people tend to get unless they are drunk! lol I just want people to feel relaxed and I hope if they see others dancing, they will feel less self-conscious.
    I have never been to a wedding with a floor show.

    Well, there was this one wedding where 10 of the wedding party members were communications and/or theater arts majors. They each gave incredibly long speeches, filled with inside jokes, in the style of roasting the bride and groom. This 'floor show' took place between cocktail hour and first course. It was dreadfully painful to sit through all that. Midway through the speeches, I made my way to the lady's room. There were many wedding guests in the loo, outdoor smoking area and bar socializing while they waited for the speeches to end. They couldn't chat at their tables because they had been turned into audience members, rather than guests. Such a pity, too, because the b & g spared no expense on food, beverage and favors only to bore the guests with the long winded speeches. Please don't force your guests to sit quietly to watch performances.

    Nix the ballet dancers, for sure. That routine seems cheesy. On the African dancers - if you or your fi are African and want to share your culture, I think it would be fine. You must promise that the African dancers will encourage participation by your guests, without pressuring the guests who don't want to dance.

    If your family members prefer chatting, rather than dancing, what's wrong with that? The reception is a thank you to your guests for sharing your wedding day with you. You should entertain them in a way that is comfortable for them.
                       
    lovesclimbingInLoveInQueensCMGragainLadyCatherineDB
  • I once saw photos from a local wedding that had ballet dancers perform before/during the couple's first dance. It was pretty but struck me as way over-the-top and AWish for sure.


    I haven't been to any weddings with cultural dances performed but I've seen a few videos (I think from Mexican and Polish weddings). So to me it seems out of place and unnecessary but as long as it doesn't run too long I don't see a problem with it.

    It would, however, do absolutely nothing in the way of encouraging me to get on the floor. As pp mentioned, watching professionals do a choreographed dance is only gonna remind me that I'm an amateur with no moves lol. If that's the purpose you'd be better off allocating that money to a great band/DJ. Or maybe hire dancers to pose as regular guests who break the ice?

    InLoveInQueenscowgirl8238
  • Sorry it has taken a bit longer to reply due to new year's stuff I had to do. There are too many responses to apply individually, but I will clarify that the 'prince' phrase I used in a different post was a euphemism! Like honey or darling! Also we are asking people to RSVP. If they do or not is up to them! All weddings normally have some form of entertainment, such as a DJ, music, even a chocolate fountain counts. I believe that weddings should have some kind of performance in them, even if it is someone simply singing a song. I think 'a floor show' of some kind definitely improves the quality of the event. A lot of weddings I go to do that and I miss it, if it is not there. The african dancers are a part of our heritage and I think they also dance with the guests, but I need to check. I have decided against the ballet now. Also my non-English family love dancing. I want the performers to help the English guests get into the groove!
  • edited January 2017
    Here is the proposed timetable (including the dancers):

    3:00 - 3:30: Ceremony

    3:30 -  4:30: Drinks reception 

    4:30 - 6:30: Buffet (I think 2 hours is long enough)

    6:30 - 7:00:  Speeches, song, cake cutting and first dance

    For this section of the day, the running order is

    i) Toast from FOB and Speech from Best Man. I have given them a maximum of 5 mins to speak.

    ii) 2 min toast from MOG and she will say something along the lines of thanks for coming.

    iii) Religious song from my cousin.  FI is not religious so we are having a civil ceremony. You are not allowed anything religious in a civil ceremony in the UK, so this is my chance to add a little religion.

    iv) FI will say thanks for coming. 

    v) Cake cutting

    vi) First dance - approx 2 mins. In the UK we only do a dance with the B and G. I've never seen one with mother of the bride and son etc.

    7:00 - midnight: African dancers followed by the disco / dance part of the wedding.

    Also the DJ I have hired is amazing! 


  • edited January 2017
    Jen4948 said:
    Max_G said:
    Sorry it has taken a bit longer to reply due to new year's stuff I had to do. There are too many responses to apply individually, but I will clarify that the 'prince' phrase I used in a different post was a euphemism! Like honey or darling! Also we are asking people to RSVP. If they do or not is up to them! All weddings normally have some form of entertainment, such as a DJ, music, even a chocolate fountain counts. I believe that weddings should have some kind of performance in them, even if it is someone simply singing a song. I think 'a floor show' of some kind definitely improves the quality of the event. A lot of weddings I go to do that and I miss it, if it is not there. The african dancers are a part of our heritage and I think they also dance with the guests, but I need to check. I have decided against the ballet now. Also my non-English family love dancing. I want the performers to help the English guests get into the groove!
    I disagree that wedding receptions need any kind of "floor show." Wedding receptions are NOT theatrical performances and your guests are not supposed to be a captive audience at what is supposed to be their "thank you" just because you're incapable of being entertained by conversation and non-professional dancing.

    It actually takes away from the "quality" of the event. I definitely don't need to watch professional dancers to get into any kind of groove at a wedding reception.

    If you have good dance music, I'll get up and dance. But if you treat me like a captive audience at my thank-you, I'll walk out.
    Luckily my guests aren't ***TOS Violation*** who would walk out if they had to sit through 5 minutes of something they disliked! I don't think they will dislike it, but what kind of a ***TOS Violation*** walks out if something happens in a wedding for about 5 minutes that they didn't like? The dance will be about 5 minutes. ***TOS Violation***.  I've been to weddings where the day was not to my taste, such as very long speeches. I didn't simply pick up my bag and go because the FOB spoke for 20 minutes. The kind of person who would do something like that shouldn't be giving etiquette advice. The guests are important at the reception but it is not ONLY about them otherwise the B & G would not attend any of it and leave immediately after the ceremony finished. The wedding is a celebration of two families coming together, and you act as if the only important people at the reception are the guests. Doing something that represents the culture of the B & G is also important. The wedding is not all about the B&G, but they form a big part too. I am not incapable of having a conversation. Maybe where you are from, they have dull weddings.
  • AddieCake said:
    I would never in a million years consider a chocolate fountain "entertainment."  

    ETA: If the African dancers are part of your heritage, then by all means go for it. I agree, though, that this would not get me on the dance floor. I don't dance. Period. So if they attempted to get me on the dance floor, I would be livid. If they are just going to do their show, cool. 
    Large chocolate fountains to me are entertainment because it's a fun interactive activity for the guests to do. You pick your own fruit to dip and so on.
  • edited January 2017
    Jen4948 said:
    Max_G said:
    Jen4948 said:
    Max_G said:
    Sorry it has taken a bit longer to reply due to new year's stuff I had to do. There are too many responses to apply individually, but I will clarify that the 'prince' phrase I used in a different post was a euphemism! Like honey or darling! Also we are asking people to RSVP. If they do or not is up to them! All weddings normally have some form of entertainment, such as a DJ, music, even a chocolate fountain counts. I believe that weddings should have some kind of performance in them, even if it is someone simply singing a song. I think 'a floor show' of some kind definitely improves the quality of the event. A lot of weddings I go to do that and I miss it, if it is not there. The african dancers are a part of our heritage and I think they also dance with the guests, but I need to check. I have decided against the ballet now. Also my non-English family love dancing. I want the performers to help the English guests get into the groove!
    I disagree that wedding receptions need any kind of "floor show." Wedding receptions are NOT theatrical performances and your guests are not supposed to be a captive audience at what is supposed to be their "thank you" just because you're incapable of being entertained by conversation and non-professional dancing.

    It actually takes away from the "quality" of the event. I definitely don't need to watch professional dancers to get into any kind of groove at a wedding reception.

    If you have good dance music, I'll get up and dance. But if you treat me like a captive audience at my thank-you, I'll walk out.
    Luckily my guests aren't ***TOS Violation*** who would walk out if they had to sit through 5 minutes of something they disliked! I don't think they will dislike it, but what kind of a ***TOS Violation*** walks out if something happens in a wedding for about 5 minutes that they didn't like? The dance will be about 5 minutes. ***TOS Violation***  I've been to weddings where the day was not to my taste, such as very long speeches. I didn't simply pick up my bag and go because the FOB spoke for 20 minutes. The kind of person who would do something like that shouldn't be giving etiquette advice.
    This forum is clearly not for you. @KnotRiley

    It sounds like living in society is clearly not for you.
  • edited January 2017
    Max_G said:
    Jen4948 said:
    Max_G said:
    Sorry it has taken a bit longer to reply due to new year's stuff I had to do. There are too many responses to apply individually, but I will clarify that the 'prince' phrase I used in a different post was a euphemism! Like honey or darling! Also we are asking people to RSVP. If they do or not is up to them! All weddings normally have some form of entertainment, such as a DJ, music, even a chocolate fountain counts. I believe that weddings should have some kind of performance in them, even if it is someone simply singing a song. I think 'a floor show' of some kind definitely improves the quality of the event. A lot of weddings I go to do that and I miss it, if it is not there. The african dancers are a part of our heritage and I think they also dance with the guests, but I need to check. I have decided against the ballet now. Also my non-English family love dancing. I want the performers to help the English guests get into the groove!
    I disagree that wedding receptions need any kind of "floor show." Wedding receptions are NOT theatrical performances and your guests are not supposed to be a captive audience at what is supposed to be their "thank you" just because you're incapable of being entertained by conversation and non-professional dancing.

    It actually takes away from the "quality" of the event. I definitely don't need to watch professional dancers to get into any kind of groove at a wedding reception.

    If you have good dance music, I'll get up and dance. But if you treat me like a captive audience at my thank-you, I'll walk out.
    Luckily my guests aren't ***TOS Violation*** who would walk out if they had to sit through 5 minutes of something they disliked! I don't think they will dislike it, but what kind of a ***TOS Violation*** walks out if something happens in a wedding for about 5 minutes that they didn't like? The dance will be about 5 minutes. ***TOS Violation***  I've been to weddings where the day was not to my taste, such as very long speeches. I didn't simply pick up my bag and go because the FOB spoke for 20 minutes. The kind of person who would do something like that shouldn't be giving etiquette advice. The guests are important at the reception but it is not ONLY about them otherwise the B & G would not attend any of it and leave immediately after the ceremony finished. The wedding is a celebration of two families coming together, and you act as if the only important people at the reception are the guests. Doing something that represents the culture of the B & G is also important. The wedding is not all about the B&G, but they form a big part too. I am not incapable of having a conversation. Maybe where you are from, they have dull weddings.
    PPs have shared first-hand experience of guests going to line up at the bar or step out for a washroom or cigarette break during this type of thing. That doesn't made them "rude crazy bitches". Even if they decided to leave altogether that's their prerogative because, once again, wedding guests are not captive audiences.

    Having additional entertainment at your wedding is not against the law but it may not be everyone's cup of tea. You asked if it would be AWish or "too much to sit through" and some have answered yes. Weddings with good food, good music, and good conversation don't need a floor show to avoid being dull.
    I didn't comment about going for a cigarette etc. The previous poster said she would walk out, which I understood as walk out and leave the wedding. That response is completely disproportionate and rude. Excusing yourself at the bar, (while not great for the B & G) isn't that bad. Leaving the wedding because you saw a 5 minutes dance is. I never said guests were captive audiences. I never said they need a floor show. I just think it can add to the experience. Everyone thinks differently and I think live entertainment, if it is good definitely makes the wedding more fun. The previous comment about me being unable to make conversation was rude. People can at wedding from 12pm - 12am. Endless talking for hours can get boring and drag on. I don't mind people saying it is not to their taste, but walking out from the wedding is ridiculous. No one forces guests to say, but they are not absolved from the rules of politeness. The worst wedding I ever attended was a Catholic ceremony lasting over 2 hours in Italian and English. I hated it, I didn't then walk out from the church because I found it boring. That would have been rude.
  • Jen4948Jen4948 Houston member
    10000 Comments Seventh Anniversary 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    edited January 2017
    Max_G said:
    Max_G said:
    Jen4948 said:
    Max_G said:
    Sorry it has taken a bit longer to reply due to new year's stuff I had to do. There are too many responses to apply individually, but I will clarify that the 'prince' phrase I used in a different post was a euphemism! Like honey or darling! Also we are asking people to RSVP. If they do or not is up to them! All weddings normally have some form of entertainment, such as a DJ, music, even a chocolate fountain counts. I believe that weddings should have some kind of performance in them, even if it is someone simply singing a song. I think 'a floor show' of some kind definitely improves the quality of the event. A lot of weddings I go to do that and I miss it, if it is not there. The african dancers are a part of our heritage and I think they also dance with the guests, but I need to check. I have decided against the ballet now. Also my non-English family love dancing. I want the performers to help the English guests get into the groove!
    I disagree that wedding receptions need any kind of "floor show." Wedding receptions are NOT theatrical performances and your guests are not supposed to be a captive audience at what is supposed to be their "thank you" just because you're incapable of being entertained by conversation and non-professional dancing.

    It actually takes away from the "quality" of the event. I definitely don't need to watch professional dancers to get into any kind of groove at a wedding reception.

    If you have good dance music, I'll get up and dance. But if you treat me like a captive audience at my thank-you, I'll walk out.
    Luckily my guests aren't ***TOS Violation*** who would walk out if they had to sit through 5 minutes of something they disliked! I don't think they will dislike it, but what kind of a ***TOS Violation*** walks out if something happens in a wedding for about 5 minutes that they didn't like? The dance will be about 5 minutes. ***TOS Violation***  I've been to weddings where the day was not to my taste, such as very long speeches. I didn't simply pick up my bag and go because the FOB spoke for 20 minutes. The kind of person who would do something like that shouldn't be giving etiquette advice. The guests are important at the reception but it is not ONLY about them otherwise the B & G would not attend any of it and leave immediately after the ceremony finished. The wedding is a celebration of two families coming together, and you act as if the only important people at the reception are the guests. Doing something that represents the culture of the B & G is also important. The wedding is not all about the B&G, but they form a big part too. I am not incapable of having a conversation. Maybe where you are from, they have dull weddings.
    PPs have shared first-hand experience of guests going to line up at the bar or step out for a washroom or cigarette break during this type of thing. That doesn't made them "rude crazy bitches". Even if they decided to leave altogether that's their prerogative because, once again, wedding guests are not captive audiences.

    Having additional entertainment at your wedding is not against the law but it may not be everyone's cup of tea. You asked if it would be AWish or "too much to sit through" and some have answered yes. Weddings with good food, good music, and good conversation don't need a floor show to avoid being dull.
    I didn't comment about going for a cigarette etc. The previous poster said she would walk out, which I understood as walk out and leave the wedding. That response is completely disproportionate and rude. Excusing yourself at the bar, (while not great for the B & G) isn't that bad. Leaving the wedding because you saw a 5 minutes dance is. I never said guests were captive audiences. I never said they need a floor show. I just think it can add to the experience. Everyone thinks differently and I think live entertainment, if it is good definitely makes the wedding more fun. The previous comment about me being unable to make conversation was rude. People can at wedding from 12pm - 12am. Endless talking for hours can get boring and drag on. I don't mind people saying it is not to their taste, but walking out from the wedding is ridiculous. No one forces guests to say, but they are not absolved from the rules of politeness. The worst wedding I ever attended was a Catholic ceremony lasting over 2 hours in Italian and English. I hated it, I didn't then walk out from the church because I found it boring. That would have been rude.
    Your guests are free to leave whenever they like.  That isn't rude. Politeness does not require that they stay and watch performances -- not even for a few minutes.

    And if you treat them like a captive audience, they will.
  • edited January 2017
    Floor shows at a wedding to me just scream low self esteem, super sweet 16, new money gaucheness. 

    Look, honour your culture by having a later performance by African dancers before the late night buffet, but once you start to make it an all singing, all dancing fondu bonanza I'm going to cringe and be really embarrassed for you. It just seems really immature. 
    Not entirely sure I see the link between low self-esteem and live entertainment. lol. I could just as easily say a lack of entertainment means you are too poor to afford better. I don't actually think that, but your comment about 'new money gaucheness' is classist and elitist. I never understood why people use the term new money like its offensive. A lot of 'old money' in England exist because they made money through slavery, and various other oppressive means. These are not people I look up to and I don't see the upper classes as something to aspire too. Most of the aristocracy made money through slavery in one form or another. So why is 'new money' a bad thing? Weird. When people use terms like 'new money' I think you are either a poor person who aspires to be above their station or an upper class person who has prejudices against people poorer than them because you assume 'new money' activities are bad. Which one are you?
  • edited January 2017
    Floor shows at a wedding to me just scream low self esteem, super sweet 16, new money gaucheness. 

    Look, honour your culture by having a later performance by African dancers before the late night buffet, but once you start to make it an all singing, all dancing fondu bonanza I'm going to cringe and be really embarrassed for you. It just seems really immature. 
    I think I read somewhere that your family is from South Africa, yet you lack insight into black culture. Maybe you are not a black/coloured SA. I would describe most predominantly black gatherings in general including weddings, funerals and christenings as an 'all singing, all dancing fondu bonanza!' lol That's what black culture around the world is! From Brazil, USA and the Caribbean, our culture is over the top, colourful and loud. While europeans were doing the waltz, slaves were inviting  their own version of samba, and capoeira, jazz and the blues. Maybe you need to meet more black people.
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