Ballet dancers and african dancers at the reception? AW or not?

MairePoppy

Max_G said:

mollybarker11 said:

Max_G said:

Jen4948 said:

Max_G said:

Sorry it has taken a bit longer to reply due to new year's stuff I had to do. There are too many responses to apply individually, but I will clarify that the 'prince' phrase I used in a different post was a euphemism! Like honey or darling! Also we are asking people to RSVP. If they do or not is up to them! All weddings normally have some form of entertainment, such as a DJ, music, even a chocolate fountain counts. I believe that weddings should have some kind of performance in them, even if it is someone simply singing a song. I think 'a floor show' of some kind definitely improves the quality of the event. A lot of weddings I go to do that and I miss it, if it is not there. The african dancers are a part of our heritage and I think they also dance with the guests, but I need to check. I have decided against the ballet now. Also my non-English family love dancing. I want the performers to help the English guests get into the groove!

I disagree that wedding receptions need any kind of "floor show." Wedding receptions are NOT theatrical performances and your guests are not supposed to be a captive audience at what is supposed to be their "thank you" just because you're incapable of being entertained by conversation and non-professional dancing.

It actually takes away from the "quality" of the event. I definitely don't need to watch professional dancers to get into any kind of groove at a wedding reception.

If you have good dance music, I'll get up and dance. But if you treat me like a captive audience at my thank-you, I'll walk out.

Luckily my guests aren't ***TOS Violation*** who would walk out if they had to sit through 5 minutes of something they disliked! I don't think they will dislike it, but what kind of a ***TOS Violation*** walks out if something happens in a wedding for about 5 minutes that they didn't like? The dance will be about 5 minutes. ***TOS Violation*** I've been to weddings where the day was not to my taste, such as very long speeches. I didn't simply pick up my bag and go because the FOB spoke for 20 minutes. The kind of person who would do something like that shouldn't be giving etiquette advice. The guests are important at the reception but it is not ONLY about them otherwise the B & G would not attend any of it and leave immediately after the ceremony finished. The wedding is a celebration of two families coming together, and you act as if the only important people at the reception are the guests. Doing something that represents the culture of the B & G is also important. The wedding is not all about the B&G, but they form a big part too. I am not incapable of having a conversation. Maybe where you are from, they have dull weddings.

PPs have shared first-hand experience of guests going to line up at the bar or step out for a washroom or cigarette break during this type of thing. That doesn't made them "rude crazy bitches". Even if they decided to leave altogether that's their prerogative because, once again, wedding guests are not captive audiences.

Having additional entertainment at your wedding is not against the law but it may not be everyone's cup of tea. You asked if it would be AWish or "too much to sit through" and some have answered yes. Weddings with good food, good music, and good conversation don't need a floor show to avoid being dull.

I didn't comment about going for a cigarette etc. The previous poster said she would walk out, which I understood as walk out and leave the wedding. That response is completely disproportionate and rude. Excusing yourself at the bar, (while not great for the B & G) isn't that bad. Leaving the wedding because you saw a 5 minutes dance is. I never said guests were captive audiences. I never said they need a floor show. I just think it can add to the experience. Everyone thinks differently and I think live entertainment, if it is good definitely makes the wedding more fun. The previous comment about me being unable to make conversation was rude. People can at wedding from 12pm - 12am. Endless talking for hours can get boring and drag on. I don't mind people saying it is not to their taste, but walking out from the wedding is ridiculous. No one forces guests to say, but they are not absolved from the rules of politeness. The worst wedding I ever attended was a Catholic ceremony lasting over 2 hours in Italian and English. I hated it, I didn't then walk out from the church because I found it boring. That would have been rude.

You can't compare a long religious ceremony to an optional performance at a wedding. One is a religious requirement.

At my DDs wedding, there were guests who sat at their tables chatting throughout the reception. I credit that to well thought out seating assignments. There were also many guests who danced throughout the reception, isn couples, groups, and some individualists. The chatters were having just as much fun as the dancers. Why should your English guests be expected to change the way they enjoy themselves. My guess is that some of the English guests will join in the dancing and some of the Nigerian guests will enjoy joking, chatting and catching up with relatives at their tables.

I'm glad you're dropping the ballet dancers because I think that would kill your party before it started.

charlotte989875

I think some of this is getting out of hand. Saying entertainment is a sign of low self esteem or gaichness is a little extreme, just as calling people crazy bitches is way out of line. 

There's a difference between etiquette and opinions. Having dancers is not breaking any etiquette rule so if you like that, and it's part of your culture go for it. Sure, it's not many people's cup of tea, but who cares if that's what you like. As you can see there are lots of different opinions about it, but if it's not interfering with guest comfort then great. 

There are a lot of things I don't like at some weddings that are perfectly within etiquette (bouquet toss, group dances like the YMCA, garter toss, games about the B and G), it doesn't make me rude for getting up and going to the bar during them, just as its not wrong for the B and G to do them if it makes them happy. 

kimmiinthemitten

I'm with Charlotte, this has gotten a bit extreme on both sides. I think OP is just trying to find a way to incorporate both her English and Nigerian guests.

I'm just going to go ahead and say it:  not all white people in western culture are comfortable being the minority in the room whereas POC are used to it from school and work etc. If she knows her guests well and believes having African dancers can help get her English guests on the dance floor and remove that barrier, I think it could be cool if done right.   There is a cultural difference, look at churches for example. Most white churches are somber and quiet. Most AA churches are loud and interactive. If it's not what you're used to, it may help to have someone from the culture introduce you. To me, the dancers are no different. 

However, that 6:30-7 block is a bit heavy. I'd move your 3 toasts to before dinner to help break it up a bit. 

[Deleted User]

kimmiinthemitten said:

I'm with Charlotte, this has gotten a bit extreme on both sides. I think OP is just trying to find a way to incorporate both her English and Nigerian guests.

I'm just going to go ahead and say it:  not all white people in western culture are comfortable being the minority in the room whereas POC are used to it from school and work etc. If she knows her guests well and believes having African dancers can help get her English guests on the dance floor and remove that barrier, I think it could be cool if done right.   There is a cultural difference, look at churches for example. Most white churches are somber and quiet. Most AA churches are loud and interactive. If it's not what you're used to, it may help to have someone from the culture introduce you. To me, the dancers are no different. 

However, that 6:30-7 block is a bit heavy. I'd move your 3 toasts to before dinner to help break it up a bit. 

Kimmiinthemitten summed up my view perfectly. I DON'T want to force anyone to dance, I'm not putting a gun to anyone's head and I won't be upset if no-one dances. I wanted everyone to feel included and for those that are too nervous to dance, but want to, I thought the dancers would help. I thought it would make the day more inclusive.

I agree this has got out of hand. All I wanted to know if two performances was OTT and some people acted as if I have now commanded everyone to dance.

Your comments about AA churches is perfect. There is a difference in culture. Most black weddings I go to have singing or some kind of act/performance at the reception. That is the way the culture is. But London Lisa's comments about gauchness shows a lack of cultural understanding. I get really annoyed when people act as if black culture is gauche because of the implied underlying prejudice. It's just different. I could say white culture is boring, but I actually just think different groups have different ideas about how to celebrate.

 I had a knee jerk reaction with the crazy bitches comments because regardless of what anyone here thinks, if some of the white guests got up and left the entire wedding never to return, when the african dancers started, I would be insulted. I would expect they would be insulted if I simply left the wedding if white people did something that was not part of my culture. 

I agree about the 6:30 block. I had similar thoughts and you have confirmed it. I might move some toasts to the end of the cocktail hour before the dinner starts to break up the day a bit.

LondonLisa

Look this is ridiculously out of control. 

For the record, I'm Xhosa, so don't be so quick to make this about race. To think that you wanting ballet dancers to honour you and your Fi during your first dance has anything to do with black culture is ludicrous. And to think that is tacky isn't predjudiced. Look, do what you want, I certainly wouldn't walk out, but I've definitely been at a wedding where the bride did a multi song set where everyone had to sit and listen to her, and it was cringy.

If you actually read what I wrote, I reiterated that if you are having Nigerian dancers because your fi is Nigerian is great later in the evening.

But please, tell me where ballet dancers, live songs, floor shows and fondue fountains are part of black culture. 

Do what you want, but you asked if it was AW, and it has been nearly unanimous in saying Nigerian Dancers, yes- Ballet dancers, no. I'm not sure what else you wanted. 

I really think you need to calm down with the defensiveness- and throwing around predjudice accusations is incredibly counter productive to ACTUAL race issues that Black British women face, not thinking your chocolate fountain is a bit naff. 

ernursej

I will only comment about the amount of time with the toasts. A toast should be VERY quick. I would take more 'entertainment' over toasts any day. Please work to decrease the toasts. Also, have these people offered to do toasts?

[Deleted User]

LondonLisa said:

Look this is ridiculously out of control. 

For the record, I'm Xhosa, so don't be so quick to make this about race. To think that you wanting ballet dancers to honour you and your Fi during your first dance has anything to do with black culture is ludicrous. And to think that is tacky isn't predjudiced. Look, do what you want, I certainly wouldn't walk out, but I've definitely been at a wedding where the bride did a multi song set where everyone had to sit and listen to her, and it was cringy.

If you actually read what I wrote, I reiterated that if you are having Nigerian dancers because your fi is Nigerian is great later in the evening.

But please, tell me where ballet dancers, live songs, floor shows and fondue fountains are part of black culture. 

Do what you want, but you asked if it was AW, and it has been nearly unanimous in saying Nigerian Dancers, yes- Ballet dancers, no. I'm not sure what else you wanted. 

I really think you need to calm down with the defensiveness- and throwing around predjudice accusations is incredibly counter productive to ACTUAL race issues that Black British women face, not thinking your chocolate fountain is a bit naff. 

When did I say ballet dancers, chocolate fountains specifically were about black culture? Rather than read what I said you are choosing to make things up instead.  Your ridiculous comment about new money revealed your own prejudices. Interesting you haven't addressed those comments.  

Your comments about new money etc were not required and completely counterproductive to what I was talking about, so don't have a go at me when it was your attitude and one other person that started this thread down the wrong path.

You said something silly about doing OTT things as being gauche etc and I made the point that black culture is about doing loud crazy things.  I did not mention the precise forms that the activities could take. Whatever people want to do is up to them. The fact that you are black doesn't make your comments any less ridiculous.

 I said I was leaving the ballet dancers anyway.  As people often say on the knot, this is a public forum and I will raise issues that I see as relevant to the topic. If you don't like my honest response maybe TK isn't for you. Your small minded comment reeked of class prejudice so expect it to get addressed. 

When did I mention I was doing chocolate fountains? I gave it as an example of entertainment, that was it. I am not here to speak about the issues facing Black British women, this is a wedding website and I asked a question about my wedding. Your later comment showed you to be a small minded person. I had no problem with posters saying ballet and african dancers are too much, that is what I asked. 

What I didn't ask for is for some stupid comments relating to tackiness, new money and whatever other nonsense you decided to write. I don't see it as necessary to engage with people who look down on the financial status of others, so I will not address this issue further with you.

Keisha84

If you are getting dancers from the same culture as you or your FI I think it would be a fun addition. I am assuming the dancers would be doing moves both young and old know so people will join in. 

A lot of African songs have dance moves associated with them. So the dancers the OP is wanting wouldn't be doing a performance persay but more of a dance along if that makes sense. I think that's where some posters are getting confused. I've been at African weddings and I love the dancers. It's a fun addition and as long as it's kept to a reasonable length does get the party started.

OP I can understand you getting upset because posters are not understanding what you are trying to do with the African dancers. However, just ignore the comments and focus on the ones that actually give advice. These boards are not the place to try and 'educate' anyone. Starting internet beef gets nothing accomplished 

crowsgirl15

Max_G said:

LondonLisa said:

Look this is ridiculously out of control. 

For the record, I'm Xhosa, so don't be so quick to make this about race. To think that you wanting ballet dancers to honour you and your Fi during your first dance has anything to do with black culture is ludicrous. And to think that is tacky isn't predjudiced. Look, do what you want, I certainly wouldn't walk out, but I've definitely been at a wedding where the bride did a multi song set where everyone had to sit and listen to her, and it was cringy.

If you actually read what I wrote, I reiterated that if you are having Nigerian dancers because your fi is Nigerian is great later in the evening.

But please, tell me where ballet dancers, live songs, floor shows and fondue fountains are part of black culture. 

Do what you want, but you asked if it was AW, and it has been nearly unanimous in saying Nigerian Dancers, yes- Ballet dancers, no. I'm not sure what else you wanted. 

I really think you need to calm down with the defensiveness- and throwing around predjudice accusations is incredibly counter productive to ACTUAL race issues that Black British women face, not thinking your chocolate fountain is a bit naff. 

When did I say ballet dancers, chocolate fountains specifically were about black culture? Rather than read what I said you are choosing to make things up instead.  Your ridiculous comment about new money revealed your own prejudices. Interesting you haven't addressed those comments.  

Your comments about new money etc were not required and completely counterproductive to what I was talking about, so don't have a go at me when it was your attitude and one other person that started this thread down the wrong path.

You said something silly about doing OTT things as being gauche etc and I made the point that black culture is about doing loud crazy things.  I did not mention the precise forms that the activities could take. Whatever people want to do is up to them. The fact that you are black doesn't make your comments any less ridiculous.

 I said I was leaving the ballet dancers anyway.  As people often say on the knot, this is a public forum and I will raise issues that I see as relevant to the topic. If you don't like my honest response maybe TK isn't for you. Your small minded comment reeked of class prejudice so expect it to get addressed. 

When did I mention I was doing chocolate fountains? I gave it as an example of entertainment, that was it. I am not here to speak about the issues facing Black British women, this is a wedding website and I asked a question about my wedding. Your later comment showed you to be a small minded person. I had no problem with posters saying ballet and african dancers are too much, that is what I asked. 

What I didn't ask for is for some stupid comments relating to tackiness, new money and whatever other nonsense you decided to write. I don't see it as necessary to engage with people who look down on the financial status of others, so I will not address this issue further with you.

So gauche isn't aright, but it's ok to call posters rude bitches?

You got some pretty great feedback here from both people in and outside of your culture about how they would interpret or enjoy what you have planned. It seems like you would prefer to be offended and insult responders rather than listen to real concerns and support about your plan.

holyguacamole79

"All I wanted to know if two performances was OTT and some people acted as if I have now commanded everyone to dance."

[Deleted User]

crowsgirl15 said:

Max_G said:

LondonLisa said:

Look this is ridiculously out of control. 

For the record, I'm Xhosa, so don't be so quick to make this about race. To think that you wanting ballet dancers to honour you and your Fi during your first dance has anything to do with black culture is ludicrous. And to think that is tacky isn't predjudiced. Look, do what you want, I certainly wouldn't walk out, but I've definitely been at a wedding where the bride did a multi song set where everyone had to sit and listen to her, and it was cringy.

If you actually read what I wrote, I reiterated that if you are having Nigerian dancers because your fi is Nigerian is great later in the evening.

But please, tell me where ballet dancers, live songs, floor shows and fondue fountains are part of black culture. 

Do what you want, but you asked if it was AW, and it has been nearly unanimous in saying Nigerian Dancers, yes- Ballet dancers, no. I'm not sure what else you wanted. 

I really think you need to calm down with the defensiveness- and throwing around predjudice accusations is incredibly counter productive to ACTUAL race issues that Black British women face, not thinking your chocolate fountain is a bit naff. 

When did I say ballet dancers, chocolate fountains specifically were about black culture? Rather than read what I said you are choosing to make things up instead.  Your ridiculous comment about new money revealed your own prejudices. Interesting you haven't addressed those comments.  

Your comments about new money etc were not required and completely counterproductive to what I was talking about, so don't have a go at me when it was your attitude and one other person that started this thread down the wrong path.

You said something silly about doing OTT things as being gauche etc and I made the point that black culture is about doing loud crazy things.  I did not mention the precise forms that the activities could take. Whatever people want to do is up to them. The fact that you are black doesn't make your comments any less ridiculous.

 I said I was leaving the ballet dancers anyway.  As people often say on the knot, this is a public forum and I will raise issues that I see as relevant to the topic. If you don't like my honest response maybe TK isn't for you. Your small minded comment reeked of class prejudice so expect it to get addressed. 

When did I mention I was doing chocolate fountains? I gave it as an example of entertainment, that was it. I am not here to speak about the issues facing Black British women, this is a wedding website and I asked a question about my wedding. Your later comment showed you to be a small minded person. I had no problem with posters saying ballet and african dancers are too much, that is what I asked. 

What I didn't ask for is for some stupid comments relating to tackiness, new money and whatever other nonsense you decided to write. I don't see it as necessary to engage with people who look down on the financial status of others, so I will not address this issue further with you.

So gauche isn't aright, but it's ok to call posters rude bitches?

You got some pretty great feedback here from both people in and outside of your culture about how they would interpret or enjoy what you have planned. It seems like you would prefer to be offended and insult responders rather than listen to real concerns and support about your plan.

I admitted rude bitches was knee jerk. But talking to me about new money etc isn't great feedback.  I actually pretty much addressed everything you said in previous posts. I even put it in bold. Responses about what is unnecessary is fine. The comments that I didn't like were from Jen about me being unable to hold a conversation and thinking it is acceptable to leave a friend/family event (the wedding) if it continued only 5 mins of stuff she didn't like. There was also London Lisa's nonsense about new money. How exactly was that helpful? These aren't real concerns just comments from rude, stuck up people. Please highlight to me where I was offended by the legitimate comments of others.

crowsgirl15

Max_G said:

crowsgirl15 said:

Max_G said:

LondonLisa said:

Look this is ridiculously out of control. 

For the record, I'm Xhosa, so don't be so quick to make this about race. To think that you wanting ballet dancers to honour you and your Fi during your first dance has anything to do with black culture is ludicrous. And to think that is tacky isn't predjudiced. Look, do what you want, I certainly wouldn't walk out, but I've definitely been at a wedding where the bride did a multi song set where everyone had to sit and listen to her, and it was cringy.

If you actually read what I wrote, I reiterated that if you are having Nigerian dancers because your fi is Nigerian is great later in the evening.

But please, tell me where ballet dancers, live songs, floor shows and fondue fountains are part of black culture. 

Do what you want, but you asked if it was AW, and it has been nearly unanimous in saying Nigerian Dancers, yes- Ballet dancers, no. I'm not sure what else you wanted. 

I really think you need to calm down with the defensiveness- and throwing around predjudice accusations is incredibly counter productive to ACTUAL race issues that Black British women face, not thinking your chocolate fountain is a bit naff. 

When did I say ballet dancers, chocolate fountains specifically were about black culture? Rather than read what I said you are choosing to make things up instead.  Your ridiculous comment about new money revealed your own prejudices. Interesting you haven't addressed those comments.  

Your comments about new money etc were not required and completely counterproductive to what I was talking about, so don't have a go at me when it was your attitude and one other person that started this thread down the wrong path.

You said something silly about doing OTT things as being gauche etc and I made the point that black culture is about doing loud crazy things.  I did not mention the precise forms that the activities could take. Whatever people want to do is up to them. The fact that you are black doesn't make your comments any less ridiculous.

 I said I was leaving the ballet dancers anyway.  As people often say on the knot, this is a public forum and I will raise issues that I see as relevant to the topic. If you don't like my honest response maybe TK isn't for you. Your small minded comment reeked of class prejudice so expect it to get addressed. 

When did I mention I was doing chocolate fountains? I gave it as an example of entertainment, that was it. I am not here to speak about the issues facing Black British women, this is a wedding website and I asked a question about my wedding. Your later comment showed you to be a small minded person. I had no problem with posters saying ballet and african dancers are too much, that is what I asked. 

What I didn't ask for is for some stupid comments relating to tackiness, new money and whatever other nonsense you decided to write. I don't see it as necessary to engage with people who look down on the financial status of others, so I will not address this issue further with you.

So gauche isn't aright, but it's ok to call posters rude bitches?

You got some pretty great feedback here from both people in and outside of your culture about how they would interpret or enjoy what you have planned. It seems like you would prefer to be offended and insult responders rather than listen to real concerns and support about your plan.

I admitted rude bitches was knee jerk. But talking to me about new money etc isn't great feedback.  I actually pretty much addressed everything you said in previous posts. I even put it in bold. Responses about what is unnecessary is fine. The comments that I didn't like were from Jen about me being unable to hold a conversation and London Lisa's nonsense about new money. How exactly was that helpful? These aren't real concerns just comments from rude, stuck up people. Please highlight to me where I was offended by the legitimate comments of others.

Your entire response to Jen's perfectly legitimate post about the fact that some people will walk out or leave was exactly where this thread started to go off the rails. When you call people bitches and say that "society isn't for them" it ramps up the intensity of the conversation. I may not have agreed with LondonLisas comment, but the nature of it seemed a lot more tame than that first response to Jen.

holyguacamole79

Forgive me if this has already been answered .... are African dancers like what you propose common in weddings in your culture or in your FI's culture?  Or is this just a nod to that culture?  

OliveOilsMom

Max_G said:

AddieCake said:

I would never in a million years consider a chocolate fountain "entertainment."  

ETA: If the African dancers are part of your heritage, then by all means go for it. I agree, though, that this would not get me on the dance floor. I don't dance. Period. So if they attempted to get me on the dance floor, I would be livid. If they are just going to do their show, cool. 

Large chocolate fountains to me are entertainment because it's a fun interactive activity for the guests to do. You pick your own fruit to dip and so on.

How do you feel about ketchup fountains???

Heffalump

Y'all, a few weeks ago when people questioned whether this poster was an AE of the Samba dancers Knottie Numbers, I will admit that I thought it was a stretch. Now that I've seen this one fly off the handle, it feels a LOT like deja vu. Doesn't seem like nearly so much of a stretch now.

drunkenwitch

Max_G said:

LondonLisa said:

Floor shows at a wedding to me just scream low self esteem, super sweet 16, new money gaucheness. 

Look, honour your culture by having a later performance by African dancers before the late night buffet, but once you start to make it an all singing, all dancing fondu bonanza I'm going to cringe and be really embarrassed for you. It just seems really immature. 

I think I read somewhere that your family is from South Africa, yet you lack insight into black culture. Maybe you are not a black/coloured SA. I would describe most predominantly black gatherings in general including weddings, funerals and christenings as an 'all singing, all dancing fondu bonanza!' lol That's what black culture around the world is! From Brazil, USA and the Caribbean, our culture is over the top, colourful and loud. While europeans were doing the waltz, slaves were inviting  their own version of samba, and capoeira, jazz and the blues. Maybe you need to meet more black people.

I don't even know how to respond to that. I've traveled. A lot. I've lived overseas. Never once have I found people of any race, ethnicity, culture, gender etc to be exactly the same everywhere I go.

[Deleted User]

I'm just going to do the african dancers and leave the ballet. Also who said black culture around the world is identical. Virtually every black culture around the globe has similarities. You would know that if you had travelled. A lot. 

[Deleted User]

I'm not going to engage in this bizarre debate. Also @drunkenwitch - black cultures across the globe share similarities. You would know that if you travelled. A lot. No one said they are identical.  I'm going to have fun african dancers and leave the ballet. 

AddieCake

Did she really think I didn't know how a chocolate fountain works? Glad she explained that one. 

Keisha84

I honestly don't get the hissy fits and dramatic exits. If you find someone offense block or ignore them. How do these people function in the real world? 

holyguacamole79

drunkenwitch

Keisha84 said:

I honestly don't get the hissy fits and dramatic exits. If you find someone offense block or ignore them. How do these people function in the real world? 

QTF

it's just an internet message board for heaven's sake. Take a breath, or a drink. Or both.

Everyone sit down, I have shocking news.

Are you ready?

People on the internet have opinions that are different from yours. They will tell you those opinions. 

Are you all okay?

southernbelle0915

IDGAF about the dancers - have them, don't have them. Whatever. 

But for the love of sweet baby Jesus, a chocolate fountain is not entertainment. At a wedding with 400 people, it's GROSS. Sorrynotsorry. Bacteria multiplies in warm places and all that chocolate is just getting recycled over and over again with people sticking things into it - maybe accidentally touching their hand, maybe double dipping, maybe dipping things that got touched. Just no. We talked to our caterer about one initially and he said they don't even do them anymore because they aren't sanitary. 

banana468

southernbelle0915 said:

IDGAF about the dancers - have them, don't have them. Whatever. 

But for the love of sweet baby Jesus, a chocolate fountain is not entertainment. At a wedding with 400 people, it's GROSS. Sorrynotsorry. Bacteria multiplies in warm places and all that chocolate is just getting recycled over and over again with people sticking things into it - maybe accidentally touching their hand, maybe double dipping, maybe dipping things that got touched. Just no. We talked to our caterer about one initially and he said they don't even do them anymore because they aren't sanitary. 

If a chocolate fountain is entertainment then so is my old lava lamp.

climbingsingle

I'm with you on the chocolate fountain being gross. That's 400 people leaning over it, breathing on it, maybe coughing and sneezing. ICKY. 

banana468

climbingwife said:

I'm with you on the chocolate fountain being gross. That's 400 people leaning over it, breathing on it, maybe coughing and sneezing. ICKY. 

My MIL tells the story that when there was a chocolate fountain at one of the events at their 55 and over condo community, the owner of the fountain stood by it the entire time policing the users and wiping off the splatter.

To this day I've never used one because I'm not a fan of the unsanitary aspect combined with splattering my nice clothing with chocolate. 

MairePoppy

Chocolate fountain is a norovirus epidemic waiting to happen. No thank you. 

lyndausvi

Chocolate fountains are so gross.  They have to water down the chocolate with so much oil for it to flow it takes awful.   Then the mess.  Oh the mess.

TheMostHappy15

Look, I think we're all in agreement that the OP was out of line in some of her comments and contributed to majorly escalating the tone of this thread, but I think she had a fair point when she called out @LondonLisa 's classist comment. Say an idea's tacky if you think it's tacky, but I think it comes across as gross to be sneering a people because they didn't acquire their wealth long enough ago or whatever. 

Ro041

I always considered "new money" to be a compliment -- like, I was smart enough to make my own money and didn't have to ride the coattails of my more successful and smart parents/grandparents/great grandparents.  If someone made that comment to me, I would tell them as much (and I did when I got a scholarship to an elite private school as a kid.  A lot of the students talked down to me because my family was poor.  I always reminded them that I was smart enough to go to school there and my family didn't have to buy my way in).