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Snarky Brides

is it rude to enclose a "rules of the event" sheet for the guests?

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Re: is it rude to enclose a "rules of the event" sheet for the guests?

  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_rude-enclose-rules-of-event-sheet-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:4955ee4c-6203-4264-bc60-8c194adea880Post:accd5474-e8e9-4571-b150-fdd17a1e9b0f">Re: is it rude to enclose a "rules of the event" sheet for the guests?</a>:
    [QUOTE]"This post makes you sound like even a bigger tool than your OP did. Bless your heart. " oh, so you all can be vultures to me about the stupidest of things, like orthography on a message board, but i cant defend myself?  im just saying that i know how to write spell, and btw, can do it in more that one language, which means that, contrary to what you'd like to believe, i am educated...  notice i haven't swore or directly attacked any one (except maybe now, and i cant defend myself???)
    Posted by AdrianaSweetheart[/QUOTE]


    1. Using words repeatedly like orthography only shows that one, you're trying to be a know-it-all unnecessarily, and two, that you know how to use a thesaurus.

    2. If I were to correct all the mistakes in your post that have nothing to do with orthography, you'd still have enough for me to count on both hands.

    3. Just because you can type in differently languages, doesn't mean jack shiit other than you know how to use babelfish. Congrats.
    image
    (Married)meganandshane.weebly.com~
    (Planning)shaneandmegan.weebly.com
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_rude-enclose-rules-of-event-sheet-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:4955ee4c-6203-4264-bc60-8c194adea880Post:accd5474-e8e9-4571-b150-fdd17a1e9b0f">Re: is it rude to enclose a "rules of the event" sheet for the guests?</a>:
    [QUOTE]"This post makes you sound like even a bigger tool than your OP did. Bless your heart. " oh, so you all can be vultures to me about the stupidest of things, like orthography on a message board, but i cant defend myself?  im just saying that i know how to write spell, and btw, can do it in more that one language, which means that, contrary to what you'd like to believe, i am educated...  notice i haven't swore or directly attacked any one (except maybe now, and i cant defend myself???)
    Posted by AdrianaSweetheart[/QUOTE]

    I never said you weren't educated, but I do think that asking a message board whether or not it's okay to publish rules for your wedding is pretty fucking stupid. And, please go ahead and defend yourself. This is an open forum, you are free to post what ever you would like. Just as we are free to tell you that your ideas suck.
    image
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_rude-enclose-rules-of-event-sheet-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:4955ee4c-6203-4264-bc60-8c194adea880Post:87d7bd8e-cbf1-4f1b-83b2-8cd97f912616">Re: is it rude to enclose a "rules of the event" sheet for the guests?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: is it rude to enclose a "rules of the event" sheet for the guests? : Screw you? Or is that too immature of me to say? This is bad advice. You CAN NOT tell adults how to dress.
    Posted by nda_roxybabe[/QUOTE]

    Yes you can!  I would if I was in her position!   Putting Black Tie on the invitations is not rude.  I would also put Adults only too. My grandmother, who is a <strong>very</strong> proper woman, has even told me the same.  I still say to speak to the FI about what to do.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_rude-enclose-rules-of-event-sheet-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:4955ee4c-6203-4264-bc60-8c194adea880Post:6b5c9de0-1a3e-4784-940c-7b0922e76fb2">Re: is it rude to enclose a "rules of the event" sheet for the guests?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: is it rude to enclose a "rules of the event" sheet for the guests? : Yes you can!  I would if I was in her position!   Putting Black Tie on the invitations is not rude.  I would also put Adults only too. My grandmother, who is a very proper woman, has even told me the same.  I still say to speak to the FI about what to do.
    Posted by katielea2[/QUOTE]
    You're crazy.
    No, you can't tell someone how to dress.
    Yes, you can put black tie if it is TRULY a black tie wedding, which is not super common.
    No, you can not put "adults only"
    Holy hell.
  • Mrs.B6302007Mrs.B6302007 member
    5000 Comments Seventh Anniversary 25 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited April 2010
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_rude-enclose-rules-of-event-sheet-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:4955ee4c-6203-4264-bc60-8c194adea880Post:6b5c9de0-1a3e-4784-940c-7b0922e76fb2">Re: is it rude to enclose a "rules of the event" sheet for the guests?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: is it rude to enclose a "rules of the event" sheet for the guests? : Yes you can!  I would if I was in her position!   Putting Black Tie on the invitations is not rude.  I would also put Adults only too. My grandmother, who is a very proper woman, has even told me the same.  I still say to speak to the FI about what to do.
    Posted by katielea2[/QUOTE]
    If you're going to quote someone, make sure you're talking about the same thing the poster is.  Roxy was not quoting the OP and the person she quoted was not talking about black tie. That person told the OP to go ahead and include a rules sheet. No one said putting black tie is rude; it's just the wrong solution in the OP's situation because she's not having a black-tie wedding.
    The Bee Hive Est. June 30, 2007
    "So I sing a song of love, Julia"
    06.10.10

    BFAR:We Defined Our Own Success!
    image

  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_rude-enclose-rules-of-event-sheet-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:4955ee4c-6203-4264-bc60-8c194adea880Post:2750f1ff-561b-47f5-aeeb-cb24e3640b67">Re: is it rude to enclose a "rules of the event" sheet for the guests?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: is it rude to enclose a "rules of the event" sheet for the guests? : If you're going to quote someone, make sure you're talking about the same thing the poster is.  Roxy was not quoting the OP and the person she quoted was not talking about black tie. That person told the OP to go ahead and include a rules sheet. No one said putting black tie is rude; it's just the wrong solution in the OP's situation because she's not having a black-tie wedding.
    Posted by Mrs.B6302007[/QUOTE]

    This, Katielea. You're confusing the posts, and also the rules of etiquette around "black tie" weddings. And I'm sure your grandmother was a lovely, "proper" person, but even she would have been wrong about the "Adults Only" thing. That's never okay from an etiquette standpoint.



    image
    Taco cat: Always a palindrome. ALWAYS, okay J&K?

    "cool......insult my size 2 body or my natural brown hair...or the fact that my parents own a country club, I have no budget for a wedding, and I have horses. I really dont care. Its better then having roots." ~ futurepivko
  • Bottom line is that it's your wedding Adriana!  Do what you feel is best! 
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  • Bottom line is don't be rude to your guest. It may be you and your fiances day but you still want to have happy guests.
  • Im still showing up in nipple tassles.
    045_45-1 photo 045_45-1.jpg
    BabyFruit Ticker
    DX: PCOS/Recurrent losses/MTHFR mutation (compound hetero)
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  • lyndausvilyndausvi Western Slope, Colorado mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its
    The RSVP thing would really bother me.  The only thing you can do is spread VIA word of mouth your expectations on that.  I normally pick my mom or DH's mom to spread such information because they are so effective at it.

    When it comes to everything else I really think you need to lower your expectations.  It would be much easier to you to just let it go than to change the opinion of an entire family.

    Let's face it your current plan might sound good to you in theory but in reality it's setting yourself up for disappointment.  They are still going to show up wearing what they want and you are going to be pissed.  If you just except the type of people they are you will cause a lot less stress for yourself.







    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_rude-enclose-rules-of-event-sheet-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:4955ee4c-6203-4264-bc60-8c194adea880Post:cf3cddb0-3f81-4e4c-8dcb-ab8fe45dd2fc">Re: is it rude to enclose a "rules of the event" sheet for the guests?</a>:
    [QUOTE]Im still showing up in nipple tassles.
    Posted by Blueyed228[/QUOTE]


    I smell a sweet sig pic coming on!


  • Lol, I stopped trying to do sig pics since it took me almost an hour to get my SC pic to not be the size of Mt Everest.  But this is what I was thinking of.....
    045_45-1 photo 045_45-1.jpg
    BabyFruit Ticker
    DX: PCOS/Recurrent losses/MTHFR mutation (compound hetero)
    5 hysteroscopies/2 surgical
    3 Inject IUIs = 2 m/c's and 1 BFN
    IVF #1= BFP. m/c at 7w6d. Needed 2 D&C's and scar tissue removal. Mild OHSS
    IVF #2 = BFP. Severe OHSS. 4 Drainings. TWINS!
  • shiit girl, you need some glitter thrown in there.
  • I like the pink. They will really bring out your eyes.
    image
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_rude-enclose-rules-of-event-sheet-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:4955ee4c-6203-4264-bc60-8c194adea880Post:025b8f22-68d9-44ed-9ad4-59bebaccabbd">Re: is it rude to enclose a "rules of the event" sheet for the guests?</a>:
    [QUOTE]shiit girl, you need some glitter thrown in there.
    Posted by MeaghanandMichael[/QUOTE]

    Clearly, lol.  Im gonna get those pink clip on extentions from hot topic to accent the whole ensemble.
    045_45-1 photo 045_45-1.jpg
    BabyFruit Ticker
    DX: PCOS/Recurrent losses/MTHFR mutation (compound hetero)
    5 hysteroscopies/2 surgical
    3 Inject IUIs = 2 m/c's and 1 BFN
    IVF #1= BFP. m/c at 7w6d. Needed 2 D&C's and scar tissue removal. Mild OHSS
    IVF #2 = BFP. Severe OHSS. 4 Drainings. TWINS!
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_rude-enclose-rules-of-event-sheet-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:4955ee4c-6203-4264-bc60-8c194adea880Post:383a5b84-f1e1-4cda-8a51-1dbe021f407f">Re: is it rude to enclose a "rules of the event" sheet for the guests?</a>:
    [QUOTE]I like the pink. They will really bring out your eyes.
    Posted by cew515[/QUOTE]

    Right?  I was considering white tasles but did not want to take away from the bride.....
    045_45-1 photo 045_45-1.jpg
    BabyFruit Ticker
    DX: PCOS/Recurrent losses/MTHFR mutation (compound hetero)
    5 hysteroscopies/2 surgical
    3 Inject IUIs = 2 m/c's and 1 BFN
    IVF #1= BFP. m/c at 7w6d. Needed 2 D&C's and scar tissue removal. Mild OHSS
    IVF #2 = BFP. Severe OHSS. 4 Drainings. TWINS!
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_rude-enclose-rules-of-event-sheet-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:4955ee4c-6203-4264-bc60-8c194adea880Post:3934f146-ffd3-460d-90b7-733529706df5">Re: is it rude to enclose a "rules of the event" sheet for the guests?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: is it rude to enclose a "rules of the event" sheet for the guests? : Right?  I was considering white tasles but did not want to take away from the bride.....
    Posted by Blueyed228[/QUOTE]
    You're such a polite guest.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_rude-enclose-rules-of-event-sheet-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:4955ee4c-6203-4264-bc60-8c194adea880Post:ce3d5336-706c-42ab-a7ce-a57737c4becf">Re: is it rude to enclose a "rules of the event" sheet for the guests?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: is it rude to enclose a "rules of the event" sheet for the guests? : You're such a polite guest.
    Posted by nda_roxybabe[/QUOTE]

    My outfit is going to be totally classy.
    045_45-1 photo 045_45-1.jpg
    BabyFruit Ticker
    DX: PCOS/Recurrent losses/MTHFR mutation (compound hetero)
    5 hysteroscopies/2 surgical
    3 Inject IUIs = 2 m/c's and 1 BFN
    IVF #1= BFP. m/c at 7w6d. Needed 2 D&C's and scar tissue removal. Mild OHSS
    IVF #2 = BFP. Severe OHSS. 4 Drainings. TWINS!
  • I think the word you are looking for is Klassy.
  • Man, you'll be even classier than me in my short dress :(
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_rude-enclose-rules-of-event-sheet-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:4955ee4c-6203-4264-bc60-8c194adea880Post:3c90cd72-8f53-416c-8330-6f60fd6d1f4d">Re: is it rude to enclose a "rules of the event" sheet for the guests?</a>:
    [QUOTE]I think the word you are looking for is Klassy.
    Posted by MeaghanandMichael[/QUOTE]

    Good call.  But only if you pronounce it kl-ASS-y.
    045_45-1 photo 045_45-1.jpg
    BabyFruit Ticker
    DX: PCOS/Recurrent losses/MTHFR mutation (compound hetero)
    5 hysteroscopies/2 surgical
    3 Inject IUIs = 2 m/c's and 1 BFN
    IVF #1= BFP. m/c at 7w6d. Needed 2 D&C's and scar tissue removal. Mild OHSS
    IVF #2 = BFP. Severe OHSS. 4 Drainings. TWINS!
  • FI wants to wear this.  Cause really.  Who doesnt like red flamingos?


    045_45-1 photo 045_45-1.jpg
    BabyFruit Ticker
    DX: PCOS/Recurrent losses/MTHFR mutation (compound hetero)
    5 hysteroscopies/2 surgical
    3 Inject IUIs = 2 m/c's and 1 BFN
    IVF #1= BFP. m/c at 7w6d. Needed 2 D&C's and scar tissue removal. Mild OHSS
    IVF #2 = BFP. Severe OHSS. 4 Drainings. TWINS!
  • Meh, you all need to shove it with your talk of clothes.  I'm going to show up at her wedding and give birth at the reception because that's just the epitome of klassy.
    BFP(1) DD1 born 4.17.10 @ 33w5d due to pPROM
    BFP(4) DD2 born 2.14.13 @ 35w5d due to pPROM

    image
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_rude-enclose-rules-of-event-sheet-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:4955ee4c-6203-4264-bc60-8c194adea880Post:043d2962-104e-40cf-9b4f-6468ec30fc91">Re: is it rude to enclose a "rules of the event" sheet for the guests?</a>:
    [QUOTE]Meh, you all need to shove it with your talk of clothes.  I'm going to show up at her wedding and give birth at the reception because that's just the epitome of klassy.
    Posted by sucrets4[/QUOTE]
    Yes! Perfect! Makesure you get up on the table or stage to do so. You know, so that you're comfortable.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_rude-enclose-rules-of-event-sheet-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:17Discussion:4955ee4c-6203-4264-bc60-8c194adea880Post:043d2962-104e-40cf-9b4f-6468ec30fc91">Re: is it rude to enclose a "rules of the event" sheet for the guests?</a>:
    [QUOTE]Meh, you all need to shove it with your talk of clothes.  I'm going to show up at her wedding and give birth at the reception because that's just the epitome of klassy.
    Posted by sucrets4[/QUOTE]

    HA!!  Right on the head table.
    045_45-1 photo 045_45-1.jpg
    BabyFruit Ticker
    DX: PCOS/Recurrent losses/MTHFR mutation (compound hetero)
    5 hysteroscopies/2 surgical
    3 Inject IUIs = 2 m/c's and 1 BFN
    IVF #1= BFP. m/c at 7w6d. Needed 2 D&C's and scar tissue removal. Mild OHSS
    IVF #2 = BFP. Severe OHSS. 4 Drainings. TWINS!
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_rude-enclose-rules-of-event-sheet-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:4955ee4c-6203-4264-bc60-8c194adea880Post:635812b3-cd20-40e6-9c65-5f3a358795a6">Re: is it rude to enclose a "rules of the event" sheet for the guests?</a>:
    [QUOTE]<strong>Rules for your guests is totally classy</strong>. Go for it. Everyone will say how classy you are and how totally classy your event is when they read your rules. Totally. * *I jogged in place while typing this, so I totally just ran amock in this thread.
    Posted by BecW2be[/QUOTE]
    Exactly what I was thinking.
    [url=http://historyandshinythings.blogspot.com/]My Blog[/url]
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  • Wow, I can't believe this thread got 9 pages of responses.

    I honestly was worried about how my family would dress at my wedding, but I've made it clear though save-the-dates, invites, etc. that it's much more formal than other family events & weddings. They know it's in a nice venue, not a backyard. They know it's being catered, not potluck. (not bashing potlucks or backyard weddings, btw) So they should know to wear appropriate attire. If they don't, they're going to look like idiots, not me. I'll be in my wedding dress. They'll be the odd ones in jeans.
  • Oh my goodness. I realize this is my first post, and most of you will find it totally inappropriate for me to introduce myselfto the boards this way, but seriously??? I made it through four or five pages of this nonsense, and I must say this is ridiculous! Give the girl a break. She wants her wedding day to be perfect, and she doesn't want to be embarrassed. Who on here can honestly say that you don't/didn't want your wedding to be perfect, or that you aren't/weren't worried that *someone* is/was going to embarrass you?

    To the OP: My FI's family is very similar. I'm actually more worried about what my MIL is going to wear than how my hair will look. And I already know the best man's father will show up in jeans and flannel. I know you're worried about being embarassed and having your day ruined. And if your family is anything like mine, they won't say anything until after the fact. But take a step back. If you got an invitation to a wedding and there was a rules sheet on how to act and dress included with the invitation, would you really want to go? This is the day you marry your best friend. The only thing that matters that day is him. If you're really worried about it, tell your photographer to only take head and shoulder shots of the people who are "inappropriately" dressed. But from what I've been hearing from recent brides I know, short of the cake falling over, you're really not going to care what happens.

    Oh, and about the kids: my FI has several cousins all close in age. Three of them are from the same family, and would be *those kids* that run around the reception like a bunch of banshees. He made a phone call to his grandmother very politely expressing my concern and asking her if she and his grandfather would mind keeping an eye out to make sure they didn't get into the cake or presents. I got the response card back from his aunt, and the kids are not coming. Now I realize every family is different. In his family, his grandfather disciplines the grandkids if they misbehave in his house. So it wasn't a big deal for them to say to his aunt "Keep a leash on them or leave them at home." But the point was that I didn't have to say anything. So if you're that concerned about the kids, maybe you could enlist FI to find a family member who would be willing to keep an eye on the kids.

    But that's just my two cents.
  • edited April 2010
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_rude-enclose-rules-of-event-sheet-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:4955ee4c-6203-4264-bc60-8c194adea880Post:a9bbcbdb-b80c-4a72-9c0d-b214a6169bb2">Re: is it rude to enclose a "rules of the event" sheet for the guests?</a>:
    [QUOTE]FI wants to wear this.  Cause really.  Who doesnt like red flamingos?
    Posted by Blueyed228[/QUOTE]

    I like how the red makes it more masculine-looking. Nice choice, hot pink would just look silly.



    image
    Taco cat: Always a palindrome. ALWAYS, okay J&K?

    "cool......insult my size 2 body or my natural brown hair...or the fact that my parents own a country club, I have no budget for a wedding, and I have horses. I really dont care. Its better then having roots." ~ futurepivko
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_rude-enclose-rules-of-event-sheet-guests?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:4955ee4c-6203-4264-bc60-8c194adea880Post:2e902c5e-b016-4e17-9319-aca9423cc1a4">Re: is it rude to enclose a "rules of the event" sheet for the guests?</a>:
    [QUOTE]Oh my goodness. I realize this is my first post, and most of you will find it totally inappropriate for me to introduce myselfto the boards this way, but seriously??? I made it through four or five pages of this nonsense, and I must say this is ridiculous! Give the girl a break. She wants her wedding day to be perfect, and she doesn't want to be embarrassed. Who on here can honestly say that you don't/didn't want your wedding to be perfect, or that you aren't/weren't worried that *someone* is/was going to embarrass you? To the OP: My FI's family is very similar. I'm actually more worried about what my MIL is going to wear than how my hair will look. And I already know the best man's father will show up in jeans and flannel. I know you're worried about being embarassed and having your day ruined. And if your family is anything like mine, they won't say anything until after the fact. But take a step back. If you got an invitation to a wedding and there was a rules sheet on how to act and dress included with the invitation, would you really want to go? This is the day you marry your best friend. The only thing that matters that day is him. If you're really worried about it, tell your photographer to only take head and shoulder shots of the people who are "inappropriately" dressed. But from what I've been hearing from recent brides I know, short of the cake falling over, you're really not going to care what happens. Oh, and about the kids: my FI has several cousins all close in age. Three of them are from the same family, and would be *those kids* that run around the reception like a bunch of banshees. He made a phone call to his grandmother very politely expressing my concern and asking her if she and his grandfather would mind keeping an eye out to make sure they didn't get into the cake or presents. I got the response card back from his aunt, and the kids are not coming. Now I realize every family is different. In his family, his grandfather disciplines the grandkids if they misbehave in his house. So it wasn't a big deal for them to say to his aunt "Keep a leash on them or leave them at home." But the point was that I didn't have to say anything. So if you're that concerned about the kids, maybe you could enlist FI to find a family member who would be willing to keep an eye on the kids.

    <strong>But that's just my two cents.</strong>
    Posted by mizk0423[/QUOTE]

    Two cents?  That's more like five bucks.
    BFP(1) DD1 born 4.17.10 @ 33w5d due to pPROM
    BFP(4) DD2 born 2.14.13 @ 35w5d due to pPROM

    image
    Lilypie Third Birthday tickersLilypie Premature Baby tickers
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