Moms and Maids

Bridesmaids: Should I get a gift or treat them to a mani/pedi?

Hi all, So I am trying to decide if I should treat my girls to a mani/pedi or get them a real gift worth about the same value of the spa visit. I would love to be able to get them both but I really can't afford it and I don't want to just tack on a cheap gift that wouldn't be meaningful to the mani/pedis. I couldn't ask them to pay on their own, but I've always envisioned a spa day as part of the wedding so I'm not sure if it's selfish of me to give them the mani/pedi as their gift when they might not have cared about getting it otherwise. 

If you were/are a bridesmaid, which would you prefer? 

Re: Bridesmaids: Should I get a gift or treat them to a mani/pedi?

  • AutumnFairAutumnFair member
    Eighth Anniversary 1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_bridesmaids-should-gift-treat-manipedi?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:357Discussion:455f6181-cec4-4c0c-a936-0cdee60bd422Post:009a4230-1d36-415e-b07a-dd34e4f7130f">Bridesmaids: Should I get a gift or treat them to a mani/pedi?</a>:
    [QUOTE]Hi all, So I am trying to decide if I should treat my girls to a mani/pedi or get them a real gift worth about the same value of the spa visit. I would love to be able to get them both but I really can't afford it and I don't want to just tack on a cheap gift that wouldn't be meaningful to the mani/pedis. <strong>I couldn't ask them to pay on their own<u>, but I've always envisioned a spa day as part of the wedding </u>so I'm not sure if it's selfish of me to give them the mani/pedi as their gift when they might not have cared about getting it otherwise.</strong>  If you were/are a bridesmaid, which would you prefer? 
    Posted by LGrunner[/QUOTE]

    <div>I think you already know. You want to do a fun girls together time beauty day so that everyone can get pretty before your wedding. But that's the thing, your doing it <em>for</em> <strong>your</strong> wedding, which isn't exactly a gift. I have never came across any random group of friends or family that do one huge spa day that's paid for by the one person for no apparent reason. The reason you want a spa day, is because it is what <strong>you</strong> "envisioned", not your friends. So I'm going to say, no on making it their gift.</div><div>
    </div><div> I think the best thing you can do is just giving it as a optional open invite that they are welcome to come to get their nails done with you, but they don't have to. If they do come then depending on what they want it will be X amount. So though it's something fun to do, you shouldn't make it their gift. </div><div><div>
    </div></div>
  • aerinpegadrakaerinpegadrak member
    10000 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    Real gift.  I personally consider a mani/pedi to be a moderate form of torture.  I didn't get my nails done for my own wedding, I'm not doing it for someone else's.
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  • jagore08jagore08 member
    Seventh Anniversary 5000 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    I also said real gift.  The mani/pedi thing is really for you not for them.

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  • trix1223trix1223 member
    5000 Comments 25 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    Real gift.  The mani/pedi is something YOU want because YOU'VE envisioned it.  So it's not really a gift for your friends as much as it's fulfilling a "vision" that you have.

    And I don't get pedis ever.   Ever.  So I would be declining your "gift".  Get me a gift card to download a book or two for my kindle; or a NY Giants sweatshirt; or something else that is chosen with me in mind, and I'd love it.
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  • edited December 2011
    Even though I enjoy manis/pedis, not everyone does. So they could end up hating it, and then that woudn't be a fun gift for anyone. Even if they like it, if you are requiring them to have professionally done nails for your wedding, you pay for it b/c you are requiring it, but it isn't a gift for them, just as jewelry or hair for the wedding day is not. It's part of their "uniform" if you will. If you can't afford a gift AND the spa stuff, don't require professional nails, so then you don't have to pay for it, and get them each a gift that they would like.


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  • Simply FatedSimply Fated member
    5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    edited December 2011
    If the mani/pedi is for your wedding it's not really a gift. It's just you paying for something you want them to get done for your wedding, ya know?

    You could give them a certificate or something so they could get a mani/pedi on their own time, though. But only if they would like it, of course.
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  • graysquirrelgraysquirrel member
    2500 Comments 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    Definitely real gift. If the spa trip is something for your wedding, then it isn't a gift. The BM gift should be something that they enjoy as a thank you for being in your wedding, not something that has anything to to with your vision of the big day. If you want them to come with you, tell them that it is optional & maybe they'll decide to come for emotional support. 
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  • Catwoman708Catwoman708 member
    Sixth Anniversary 1000 Comments 5 Love Its
    edited December 2011
    Personally, I'd prefer to be treated to a mani-pedi. 

    Or if you were thinking really nice gifts, do both, just scale back to a small token gift in addition to the salon services.
  • edited December 2011
    you know your friends best.  if they're the salon girls type, i'd say go for the mani/pedi. 

    i personally would love a free mani/pedi!  i wouldn't care if it was before the big day.  i'd still graciously accept and see it as a wonderful thank you.  and the extra bonus would be that i got to spend it with my wonderful friend and bride to be! 
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  • edited December 2011
    If they are spa girls then the mani/pedi is a great idea. If they aren't or you don't know then it could be very very bad (ie some people have issues with getting their feet touched, etc.)

    A regular gift and an invitation to join you for mani/pedis would be best.
  • KnibletKniblet member
    2500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    A real gift that doesn't need to be "fixed" in less than two weeks.  They'll appreciate it.
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