Is it okay to have a bridal shower and a jack & jill?

klp2003

My mom and maid of honor are throwing me a bridal shower. My fiance and I are planning on having a jack & jill as well. Is it okay/proper etiquette to have both? I would like to know everyone's honest opinion

saacjw

Ettiquete-wise, don't throw yourself a shower. If someone else wants to throw you a jack and jill- that's just fine. 

lulu4150

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_is-it-okay-to-have-a-bridal-shower-and-a-jack-jill?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:36Discussion:a6db2a50-805d-4c7b-b3dd-ad19391f342dPost:5b9215f6-c0d7-43b2-981e-dfdb6b5a68a7">Re: Is it okay to have a bridal shower and a jack & jill?</a>:
[QUOTE]<strong>Ettiquete-wise, don't throw yourself a shower. If someone else wants to throw you a jack and jill- that's just fine. </strong>
Posted by saacjw[/QUOTE]

This.

Personally I don't like Jack and Jills.  I think its tacky, but to each his own.  Do you know enough people that there wouldn't be an overlap in invites? I don't think people would go to a wedding shower and a Jack and Jill.  That's just greedy.

zitiqueen

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_is-it-okay-to-have-a-bridal-shower-and-a-jack-jill?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:36Discussion:a6db2a50-805d-4c7b-b3dd-ad19391f342dPost:14148f16-56c4-4b2d-ba71-70b6828e3178">Is it okay to have a bridal shower and a jack & jill?</a>:
[QUOTE]My mom and maid of honor are throwing me a bridal shower. My fiance and I are planning on having a jack & jill as well. Is it okay/proper etiquette to have both? I would like to know everyone's honest opinion :)
Posted by klp2003[/QUOTE]

Who is hosting the Jack and Jill?

DramaGeek

There are two kinds of Jack and Jills.  One is a couples shower, the other is a wedding fundraiser.  If you mean a couple's shower, someone else has offered to host it and the guest list won't overlap (much), go for it.  If you mean the wedding fundraiser, it's rude and inappropriate.

MyNameIsNot

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_customs-traditions_is-it-okay-to-have-a-bridal-shower-and-a-jack-jill?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:36Discussion:a6db2a50-805d-4c7b-b3dd-ad19391f342dPost:edb99506-8555-461a-882f-32e653f06877">Re: Is it okay to have a bridal shower and a jack & jill?</a>:
[QUOTE]There are two kinds of Jack and Jills.  One is a couples shower, the other is a wedding fundraiser.  If you mean a couple's shower, someone else has offered to host it and the guest list won't overlap (much), go for it.  If you mean the wedding fundraiser, it's rude and inappropriate.
Posted by DramaGeek[/QUOTE]

<div>This.  Those awful fundraisers are never appropriate.  </div>

m tulli

Depending on the jack and jill depends on my answer.  I have only been invited to one fund raiser style Jack and Jill.  I will say I was very put off.  My ex husband was in the wedding party so we were told we were to do this this and that for it.  We ended up not going.  We had already bought a shower gift and to me this just seemed gift grabby.  I didn't feel it was up to me to fund someone elses wedding.  

If it is a co ed shower which I have been to I am fine with that but you shouldn't throw your own shower.  

skippylouwho

I would not attend a fund-raiser for a wedding.  Parties related to the wedding should be hosted and planned by others, not by the couple.