OK, it's a slightly sticky situation, but I thought I'd ask for help.
My aunt "Claire" (mother's sister) is my best friend, confidant, and is my right hand for planning my wedding. In fact, I listen to Claire's advice more then my own mom, because we agree so much and she's so much more helpful. Claire wants to help, and has told me for several years now she will -- from buying the wedding cake, to getting a veil, nice shower gifts, and more importantly, her time and suggestions for wedding planning. I appreciate this not only from a material perspective, but an emotional one as well. I cannot plan my wedding without my Aunt Claire.
Long story short, however, my cousin named "Sara" had her wedding several years ago, and essentially stepped all over Claire's good intentions, and ruined their relationship. I won't get into details, but Sara was ungrateful, and acted terribly for my aunt's work and gifts. To this day, it left a bad taste in her mouth. The last thing I want to do is do redo what Sara did. I love my aunt and want to not damage our relationship.
Also, how do I show my appreciation for her at my wedding? I'd like to include Claire in my wedding party, but she has already said no to being a Bride's Maid or Matron. Can I include her at my the Head Table at the Reception? I don't like the idea of a Reading at the Ceremony, since it's too impersonal. Claire means more to me then that. Since my aunt is unmarried, and in her50's, I'm sure to offend if I don't step lightly. And, I don't want to offend my own mother either, since she is the MotB....
Thanks in advance