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Love and Light too ALL!

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Re: Love and Light too ALL!

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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_cake-shoving-yes-or-np?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:a6cb2e82-f9dc-4367-a2ca-e08cfb26f790Post:9339ac9d-0727-41e7-aded-be25a50a1d99">Re: Cake shoving - Yes or Np?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Cake shoving - Yes or Np? : Yeah nothing extraem just take a bite and then oops my hand slipped. I don't want to make a mess or anything just be cute and fun! This is the first helpful feed back I've recieved.
    Posted by alishaloo[/QUOTE]

    <div>It's not cute and fun to do something your FI is against. </div>
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_cake-shoving-yes-or-np?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:a6cb2e82-f9dc-4367-a2ca-e08cfb26f790Post:9cbf0423-1c6c-4b54-992d-52b257d5fbf5">Re: Cake shoving - Yes or Np?</a>:
    [QUOTE]Why would the icing be old?
    Posted by PetalPockets2012[/QUOTE]
    Idk. I think that's what she said, but I couldn't quite understand what she was saying.
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    In Response to Re:Cake shoving Yes or Np?:[QUOTE]In Response to Re:Cake shoving Yes or Np?:In Response to Re:Cake shoving Yes or Np?: Icing smells like old milk?Posted by HandBananaNo. Old Icing smells like milk. I think. Posted by crash2729[/QUOTE]

    I still don't get it.
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_cake-shoving-yes-or-np?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:a6cb2e82-f9dc-4367-a2ca-e08cfb26f790Post:9339ac9d-0727-41e7-aded-be25a50a1d99">Re: Cake shoving - Yes or Np?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Cake shoving - Yes or Np? : Yeah nothing extraem just take a bite and then oops my hand slipped. I don't want to make a mess or anything just be cute and fun! <strong>This is the first helpful feed back I've recieved.</strong>
    Posted by alishaloo[/QUOTE]

    Really? Or is the advice that justifies you doing what you want despite others' feelings?

    You asked what you should do. People gave you opinions, their thoughts and some personal experiences. That was helpful.
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_cake-shoving-yes-or-np?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:a6cb2e82-f9dc-4367-a2ca-e08cfb26f790Post:620e938a-7f72-4d05-b970-487c1c26caeb">Re:Cake shoving Yes or Np?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re:Cake shoving Yes or Np?: I still don't get it.
    Posted by HandBanana[/QUOTE]
    Confused party of 2. :)
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_cake-shoving-yes-or-np?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:a6cb2e82-f9dc-4367-a2ca-e08cfb26f790Post:9339ac9d-0727-41e7-aded-be25a50a1d99">Re: Cake shoving - Yes or Np?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Cake shoving - Yes or Np? : Yeah nothing extraem just take a bite and then oops my hand slipped. I don't want to make a mess or anything just be cute and fun! <strong>This is the first helpful feed back I've recieved.</strong>
    Posted by alishaloo[/QUOTE]

    No, this is the first feedback that told you that you are right and should do what you want.  Just because the other feedback said "If your new spouse doesn't want you to jam food in his face in public, you shouldn't do it" and you wanted to hear "It's fun if it's only a little, go for it" doesn't mean the rest of the advice was unhelpful. 
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    http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_help-please-uptight-in-laws

    I have never heard of a game at a wedding where the bride is feeling up the groom for safety pins. I am embarrassed for you that you want to do this. I think your FILs are trying to help you make classy choices so you can look back in years to come and not regret your behavior at your wedding.
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    Question: Did your FI give up his idea of walking down the aisle to Mambo Number 5?
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_cake-shoving-yes-or-np?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:a6cb2e82-f9dc-4367-a2ca-e08cfb26f790Post:9339ac9d-0727-41e7-aded-be25a50a1d99">Re: Cake shoving - Yes or Np?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Cake shoving - Yes or Np? : Yeah nothing extraem just take a bite and then oops my hand slipped. I don't want to make a mess or anything just be cute and fun! This is the first helpful feed back I've recieved.
    Posted by alishaloo[/QUOTE]
    Fun for you, but disrespectful to your new husband. While you're giggling because its soooo kewt! your husband will be wiping icing from his face and wondering if you really did "just slip" or if you blatantly disregarded his wishes so YOU could have a laugh.
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_cake-shoving-yes-or-np?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:a6cb2e82-f9dc-4367-a2ca-e08cfb26f790Post:469ffe8c-60d9-49fc-95b9-bb18948a8b3a">Re: Cake shoving - Yes or Np?</a>:
    [QUOTE]<a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_help-please-uptight-in-laws">http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_help-please-uptight-in-laws</a> <strong>I have never heard of a game at a wedding where the bride is feeling up the groom for safety pins.</strong> I am embarrassed for you that you want to do this. I think your FILs are trying to help you make classy choices so you can look back in years to come and not regret your behavior at your wedding.
    Posted by PetalPockets2012[/QUOTE]
    This. <div>I can't imagine feeling H up in front of all our family and friends. How awkward. </div><div>
    </div><div>Also? </div><div>Mambo No.5 is 100% inappropriate for a wedding ceremony.</div>
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    If you do this, you will have some great pics of your new husband angry or at the very least hurt. He said no. Lets say you told him you and your family found it disrespectful for a groom to remove the garter wih his teeth. At the wedding he removes your garter with his teeth in front of all your family and friends.
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_cake-shoving-yes-or-np?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:a6cb2e82-f9dc-4367-a2ca-e08cfb26f790Post:46655ab2-af5b-4df0-8869-cd3f42edafc8">Re: Cake shoving - Yes or Np?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Cake shoving - Yes or Np? : This.  I can't imagine feeling H up in front of all our family and friends. How awkward.  Also? <strong> Mambo No.5 is 100% inappropriate for a wedding ceremony.
    </strong>Posted by crash2729[/QUOTE]

    Should I change my plans of walking down the aisle to "Like a Virgin" or is that okay since Mary was a virgin?
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_cake-shoving-yes-or-np?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:a6cb2e82-f9dc-4367-a2ca-e08cfb26f790Post:aee28ac9-c163-44ba-aea2-489fdd22f8f0">Re: Cake shoving - Yes or Np?</a>:
    [QUOTE]Oh man, I wish someone could have quoted so I would be able to read the crazy.  I think I have a pretty good idea, though.
    Posted by EaglesBride2012[/QUOTE]

    Eagles:

    My FI- says that his family says- that it is Disrespectful, out of line and RUDE to shove cake in eachothers faces at a wedding.... I really don't know how to respond to this beacuse I think its just crazy and up tight to think that way. We both come from very different familys but blend well together- how ever I don't blend well into his family as is.. I don't want to make it worse<strong> I'm super tradtional and have been dreaming about this my entire life</strong>... and now I don't really know what to do. Just don't talk about it and do it at the wedding. Flat out ask his family what they think about it and why so maybe I can see thire side? Drop it and just let it go ( its kinda one of those things I really don't want to settle on.) Compramise and just do ... oh a little frosting on his nose? I dk what to do... I know it shouldn't be that big of a deal to me but it like it!
    Posted by alishaloo
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    Nothing says klassy wedding ceremony more than a song about a guy who likes to get around.

    @eagles That happened at a wedding my friend was working at. She came into the venue's kitchen not quite sure what to do because the bride smashed cake in the groom's face. It got all over his glasses and he couldn't see anything. He awkwardly stormed out... I forget if he was the groom who sulked in the other room the rest of the night or if he was the groom who took off early in the limo by himself. Bitches be crazy.

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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_cake-shoving-yes-or-np?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:a6cb2e82-f9dc-4367-a2ca-e08cfb26f790Post:ddca72b5-9cb5-4117-84c8-af44c181c9ec">Re: Cake shoving - Yes or Np?</a>:
    [QUOTE]<strong>Nothing says klassy wedding ceremony more than a song about a guy who likes to get around</strong>. @eagles That happened at a wedding my friend was working at. She came into the venue's kitchen not quite sure what to do because the bride smashed cake in the groom's face. It got all over his glasses and he couldn't see anything. He awkwardly stormed out... I forget if he was the groom who sulked in the other room the rest of the night or if he was the groom who took off early in the limo by himself. Bitches be crazy.
    Posted by Simply Fated[/QUOTE]
    Don't forget fliritng with the BMs thing. <div>That's super Klassy. It even gets a capital "K".</div>
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_cake-shoving-yes-or-np?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:a6cb2e82-f9dc-4367-a2ca-e08cfb26f790Post:8adf7483-1614-4561-aa0f-07c09c12b64f">Re: Cake shoving - Yes or Np?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Cake shoving - Yes or Np? : Really? Or is the advice that justifies you doing what you want despite others' feelings? You asked what you should do. People gave you opinions, their thoughts and some personal experiences. That was helpful.
    Posted by PetalPockets2012[/QUOTE]

    no its not beacuse this post isn't even about my FI being against it he doesn't mind it is his FAMILY who thinks its wrong- his family who he doesn't even agree with how they work or think or anything like that
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_cake-shoving-yes-or-np?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:a6cb2e82-f9dc-4367-a2ca-e08cfb26f790Post:66b3ee39-bc23-422a-b2bd-9769c3c93593">Cake shoving - Yes or Np?</a>:
    [QUOTE]Sorry I even asked about this one.
    Posted by alishaloo[/QUOTE]

    <div>You should be. </div>
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_cake-shoving-yes-or-np?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:a6cb2e82-f9dc-4367-a2ca-e08cfb26f790Post:ab72478a-74cb-4273-825f-b854d8ad68a6">Re: Cake shoving - Yes or Np?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Cake shoving - Yes or Np? : no its not beacuse this post isn't even about my FI being against it he doesn't mind it is his FAMILY who thinks its wrong- his family who he doesn't even agree with how they work or think or anything like that
    Posted by alishaloo[/QUOTE]
    Then what does your FI think?
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    The post on Reception Ideas said she wanted to play a game where they put safety pins all over the grooms clothing and then blindfold the bride so she can feel him up to find the pins at the reception.

    It also said the GM wanted to walk down the aisle to Mambo No.5 while flirting with the BM.
    It addressed the cake smashing as well.

    Her FILs are against all of these things and she doesn't understand why. Should she do them anyway? Which ones?
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_cake-shoving-yes-or-np?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:a6cb2e82-f9dc-4367-a2ca-e08cfb26f790Post:9339ac9d-0727-41e7-aded-be25a50a1d99">Re: Cake shoving - Yes or Np?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Cake shoving - Yes or Np? : Yeah nothing extraem just take a bite and then oops my hand slipped. I don't want to make a mess or anything just be cute and fun! This is the first helpful feed back I've recieved.
    Posted by alishaloo[/QUOTE]

    First, you asked for opinions and advice and that's exactly what you got.
    Second, "helpful" is not limited to agreement.
    The Bee Hive Est. June 30, 2007
    "So I sing a song of love, Julia"
    06.10.10

    BFAR:We Defined Our Own Success!
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    In Response to Re:Cake shoving Yes or Np?:[QUOTE]The post on Reception Ideas said she wanted to play a game where they put safety pins all over the grooms clothing and then blindfold the bride so she can feel him up to find the pins at the reception.It also said the GM wanted to walk down the aisle to Mambo No.5 while flirting with the BM. It addressed the cake smashing as well. Her FILs are against all of these things and she doesn't understand why. Should she do them anyway? Which ones? Posted by PetalPockets2012[/QUOTE]

    I like her FILs.
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    OP - Even though your FI says he doesn't have a problem with it, he has mentioned to you how his family feels. If my FI made a point to do that, I would realize that maybe he does care about it or at least cares about offending his family. I wouldn't want to intentionally offend my FILs over something so small.

    I consider this to be my helpful advice.
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    OP, if nothing else, you've mentioned in several other posts that your wedding and reception are formal. Take a minute and really think about that statement. Do any of those ideas really seem to fit with formal? I'm not saying formal can't be fun, or that it equals uptight, but your ideas don't really seem to mesh with the feel you're trying to acheive.
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_cake-shoving-yes-or-np?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:a6cb2e82-f9dc-4367-a2ca-e08cfb26f790Post:ab72478a-74cb-4273-825f-b854d8ad68a6">Re: Cake shoving - Yes or Np?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Cake shoving - Yes or Np? : no its not beacuse this post isn't even about my FI being against it he doesn't mind it is his FAMILY who thinks its wrong- his family who he doesn't even agree with how they work or think or anything like that
    Posted by alishaloo[/QUOTE]
    Then why is this cake-smashing thing an issue? If he wants to do it. And you want to do it. Do it.
    Think about this.... Is smashing cake into someone's face really something you feel you need to do in order for your wedding day to be perfect so much so that you'll risk annoying his family?

    I mean, I still think cake smashing is dumb, but I'm not going to be a guest at your wedding, so that's besides the point.
    image
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_cake-shoving-yes-or-np?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:a6cb2e82-f9dc-4367-a2ca-e08cfb26f790Post:85ac6a05-8ad7-4f44-b754-ec1f1dbe85c8">Re: Cake shoving - Yes or Np?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Cake shoving - Yes or Np? : THESE STORIES SOUND AWESOME.
    Posted by EaglesBride2012[/QUOTE]
    lol I just wanted to point out to the OP that these things people are mentioning with grooms getting pissed and leaving really do happen. It's not a pretty sight, but it was good for a laugh, When the managers had to deal with the fall out, I felt pretty bad for them. Same with the bridal attendants because they were pretty much no longer guaranteed a tip.
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_cake-shoving-yes-or-np?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:a6cb2e82-f9dc-4367-a2ca-e08cfb26f790Post:188d3d24-4c95-4b99-968f-586e98a3f2f2">Re: Cake shoving - Yes or Np?</a>:
    [QUOTE]FI thinks it would be funny and cute, <strong>I told him I'd consider it assault and grounds for annulment</strong>. I totally get where your FI is coming from, you should respect his wishes. If you were both on the same page I'd say go for it, but you obviously are not. It's super tacky, IMO, and I'm not sure I've ever actually seen it done at a wedding. It won't kill you to skip smashing cake in your H's face.
    Posted by kroot87[/QUOTE]

    Am I missing your joke font?  Because I hugely agree with the fact that it's gross and disrespectful and I'd be pretty upset if my H had done it anyway....but ASSAULT?  I mean... it's not like he punched you and just so happened to have a fistful of cake.

    image
    Everything the light touches is my kingdom.
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    AdeleDazeemAdeleDazeem member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper First Comment
    edited July 2012
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_cake-shoving-yes-or-np?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:a6cb2e82-f9dc-4367-a2ca-e08cfb26f790Post:8adf7483-1614-4561-aa0f-07c09c12b64f">Re: Cake shoving - Yes or Np?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Cake shoving - Yes or Np? : Really? Or is the advice that justifies you doing what you want despite others' feelings? You asked what you should do. People gave you opinions, their thoughts and some personal experiences. That was helpful.
    Posted by PetalPockets2012[/QUOTE]

    Woah, woah.... I didn't justify her.  I just gave my personal thoughts on cake smashing, not her actual situation because it seems like a damn mess.
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    I'm so glad that H and I were always on the same page about what we wanted for our wedding.  
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    Anybody else just waiting for the MIL or SIL or someone to show up and start complaing about their son/brother/cousin's crazy fi who wants to trash up the wedding?
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_cake-shoving-yes-or-np?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:a6cb2e82-f9dc-4367-a2ca-e08cfb26f790Post:11f90bbb-637d-48fa-879f-0ec76cd82f7f">Re: Cake shoving - Yes or Np?</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Cake shoving - Yes or Np? : Woah, woah.... I didn't justify her.  I just gave my personal thoughts on cake smashing, not her actual situation because it seems like a damn mess.
    Posted by Joy2611[/QUOTE]

    Not meant that you were justifying it but that it OP clung to the first opinion that likes the idea of cake smashing and is justifying that it's ok for her to do since someone else likes it in general.
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