Confessions

maggyruth

I have a slight obsession with my FI's ex...I was extremely pleased when I found pictures of her that I'm prettier than she is (well, at least I think so.)  And I actually told FI so (horrible, I know.)


(btw...he did dispose of the pics...he didn't realize he still had them.  That's what he gets for leaving me to my own devices...I snoop.)

dandan83

I confess that I feel really bad about my friend paying for our upcoming trip. It was her suggestion and she keeps saying that I'm doing a favor for her by coming along but I can't help but feel really horrible about it.

On a strange side note I'm hoping when all the people I used to consider friends find out about the trip they're all gonna be like OMG!!!!

TurtlesAllTheWayDown

Lauren, my college ex doesn't have FB either. But I saw pics of him at a wedding on someone else's FB. He's gained a lot of weight. And he's in a profession where looks matter. It made me smile. It's no where near as bad as the dead-roommate-on-the-couch, though.

aMrsin09

I confess that there are a few people I'd like to FB stalk, but they have their profiles locked down as tight as mine is.  I won't send a friend request because even though I want to know about their lives, I don't want them to know about mine,

nhelene

I sometimes fb stalk my horrible skank-bag of an ex-roomate to make sure her life still sucks. 

Funny thing is now she lives in my old hometown and I live in hers.

amalama

Also, I kind of wonder if anyone does that to me. Looking back, I may have been a bit of a jerk in high school, and got great grades and scholarships for college. Then I then quit because I hated it there, and now I'm almost 25 and still have a couple years left, and have a 2 year old with my boyfriend. I know that it suprises a lot of people from high school, and I actually love my life despite the fact that it didn't go exactly as planned, but I wonder if any of them secretly think that my life sucks and are happy about it.

BecW2be

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_confessions-19?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:cf333eaf-c26b-4f23-8fd9-50bf18e5dd54Post:fbcd749e-3c09-430e-8d0a-669894368b79">Re: Confessions</a>:
[QUOTE]I'm kind of jealous of my BM/BFF from way back.  She's a year younger than I am, but one step ahead on everything--got married first, has an awesome, high-paying job, owns a beautiful home, and now she's pregnant.  I love her and I'm genuinely happy for her because she's awesome and deserves it all, but I hate feeling like I'm one (or, okay, two or three) steps behind her and I'm older.
Posted by Brie2010[/QUOTE]

I think everyone has a person in her life that she feels pangs of jealousy. But we can't ever know exactly how happy she is or what she's been through to get to that point in her life. My younger sister literaly has it all. HUGE mountain house, new luxury car every 3 months, endless bank accounts, trips all over the world on whims, etc. I really try to remember how lonely she gets up there when her husband has to travel, and how with the bigger house/cars comes bigger worries, and not one of us really has it all. You are not two or three steps behind her because we never really fall in line with any other person in our lives. We go at our own pace and do our thing and hope for the best.

Never feel like less of a success because someone close appears further along. You just never know. :)

temerityjane

Oh God my other confession, how did I forget this.

When Buddy and I first got together, we didn't think we'd have kids, but  neither of us put an absolute on it, because things change sometimes, for some people, especially for some women when lady biology kicks in. Shortly after we got engaged, out of nowhere, like a switch flipped, I knew I wanted to have one kid.

Sometime in the last month or so, though, my uterus has kicked into ridiculous overdrive. From the moment I open my eyes in the morning, I swear, it's "babies babies babies babies babies." I can't get a grip. I point out every baby I see like it's somehow totally unfair that someone else has a baby when I don't. The fact that we're not going to start trying until after the wedding and that even if I IMMEDIATELY got pregnant, it would STILL be 9 more months until I had a baby seems torturous.

On top of all that, I KNOW I am being COMPLETELY irrational, which makes it all the more frustrating. 

Babies.

dandan83

Very well said Bec! That's a great reminder.

lisarose7

I'm still friends with my ex and we talk online at least a couple of times a week.  FI knows we still talk and is cool with it, since I haven't been in a relationship with the ex since 1998.  Here's my confession: the ex apologized for being a total ass to me when we were dating, and told me that breaking up with me was the worst mistake he ever made...and that made me happy.  I'm completely happy with FI and wouldn't get back together with the ex even if I was single, but it still made me happy to know that he realized he f'ed up.

kkchisholm

I confess that I checked out fi's ex facebook.. She met a guy, got pregnant a month later, and now the baby is less than a year old and she is on 3rd guy since the babies dad. And she always says "omg I am sooooo happpy with whateverguyitisatthetime". 
Ever since then, I love to look.

It makes me happy I am pretty much way better than her.

AlexiaANDRobert

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_confessions-19?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:cf333eaf-c26b-4f23-8fd9-50bf18e5dd54Post:c46f59b4-380b-49fd-87b7-115a9140db54">Re: Confessions</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Confessions : I think everyone has a person in her life that she feels pangs of jealousy. But we can't ever know exactly how happy she is or what she's been through to get to that point in her life. My younger sister literaly has it all. HUGE mountain house, new luxury car every 3 months, endless bank accounts, trips all over the world on whims, etc. I really try to remember how lonely she gets up there when her husband has to travel, and how with the bigger house/cars comes bigger worries, and not one of us really has it all. You are not two or three steps behind her because we never really fall in line with any other person in our lives. We go at our own pace and do our thing and hope for the best. Never feel like less of a success because someone close appears further along. You just never know. :)
Posted by BecW2be[/QUOTE]


That was pretty inspirational and something I needed to hear right now.  So, thank you.  :)  Your girls are lucky.  They're going to thank you a lot when they realize it.

Brie2010

Aww, Bec!

I know you're right.  I know she has to take middle-of-the-night phone calls and work Saturdays, and that must suck, but my irrational side is all, "PRETTY HOUSE!  BABY!  WANT! (footstomp)"

Also, we have a dog and she doesn't.  So there.

BecW2be

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_confessions-19?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:cf333eaf-c26b-4f23-8fd9-50bf18e5dd54Post:c44edbb1-aca6-4148-9bd0-c00b58c84d8e">Re: Confessions</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Confessions : That was pretty inspirational and something I needed to hear right now.  So, thank you.  :)  Your girls are lucky.  They're going to thank you a lot when they realize it.
Posted by AlexiaANDRobert[/QUOTE]

Well, I really needed to hear that right now. And I'm crying. Thank you. :)

lannerjarv

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_confessions-19?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:cf333eaf-c26b-4f23-8fd9-50bf18e5dd54Post:61bcaaf8-cfb1-4c06-9f9f-770ec0522ba3">Re: Confessions</a>:
[QUOTE]Oh, I also enjoy looking at all the biitches that were mean to me in high school. Makes me happy that they're fat and stuck in that town and half of them are pregnant/have children with no baby daddy in sight. Makes me feel pretty awesome when they made fun of me for being so poor and ugly. Like you said, success is the best revenge.
Posted by louisvillebride21[/QUOTE]
THIS!

AlexiaANDRobert

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_confessions-19?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:cf333eaf-c26b-4f23-8fd9-50bf18e5dd54Post:20631f97-8784-4525-b42f-bf8c13aa7346">Re: Confessions</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Confessions : Well, I really needed to hear that right now. And I'm crying. Thank you. :)
Posted by BecW2be[/QUOTE]

Aw, shiit, that was supposed to make you smile!!!!!! :)

laurenclaire1386

Ok, I've got another ex related confession. FI's biggest relationship before me was with a girl who is basically my polar opposite. She's a really smart girl, extremely well traveled, has a degree in Russian lit and just got accepted to LSU law school. (yeah I friended her on FB, whatever. We were acquaintances before FI and I started dating) Anyway, she has been working in New Orleans, but now she's going to be back in our city. I'm not scared FI wants her or anything. It's just that she has more degrees than I do and seemingly has her life more together than I do and it makes me insecure. I don't want to share a city with her. I know FI loves me and has zero desire to even speak to this girl, but I feel irrationally jealous and territorial.

K Byte

This topic reminded me to look up some of my exes on Facebook, but none of them are up to anything interesting that I can tell. I refuse to add any of them as friends so I can't see their full profiles anyway. I do enjoy a good schadenfreude but they're probably just up to the same old stuff of not having good jobs, not having girlfriends, and living with their parents.

I have a specific facebook friend list set up for random adds from annoying high school people. I started getting a lot of them when I put up one of our engagment pics (which is pretty obviously an e-pic) as my profile picture. I figure people probably wanted to creep on my pictures so I set that group so that they can't see any of my photo albums

BecW2be

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_confessions-19?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:cf333eaf-c26b-4f23-8fd9-50bf18e5dd54Post:f0cb316f-3c29-498d-a613-58d58c8d1d58">Re: Confessions</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Confessions : Aw, shiit, that was supposed to make you smile!!!!!! :)
Posted by AlexiaANDRobert[/QUOTE]

It did! While I was crying, in fact! I'm just a big ole blubbery, emotional mess right now, and you hit a nerve. There's someshit going on right now that I won't get into, but it's nice to read all you girls' random comments about my parenting and outlook on days when I feel like a big, fat failure. It helps more than you'll ever know.

sarabellam

For MONTHS, I have been talking to my ex-h about his job (or lack thereof) situation and the house he is trying to sell. I asked him MONTHS ago why he didn't just walk away and let the bank foreclose. He gave me the song and dance about he didn't want it to ruin his credit rating, he thinks they've got a buyer, blahblahblah. I was talking with him earlier this week, suggesting a short sale (and talking about daughter's upcoming surgery), and he told me they were going to finally walk away, and said, "I should have listened to you a long time ago." Well, noshit, Sherlock! My confession? I get ENORMOUS amusement in the fact that my ex-husband and ex-BFF are currently homeless, and that he finally admitted that I was right.

SarahPLiz

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_confessions-19?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:cf333eaf-c26b-4f23-8fd9-50bf18e5dd54Post:d7315c98-8dc9-405e-9864-bcc2727223ba">Re: Confessions</a>:
[QUOTE] My confession:  I am making an appt with a plastic surgeon for a consultation for lipo.  I have big patches of scar tissue under the skin on my hips as a result of a surgery I had at 13, and you can where it bulges out under my clothes, and I hate it.
Posted by arbolita[/QUOTE]

I confess that I had my first Zerona laser treatment yesterday. I am waivering between fear that its a huge waste of money and I will look like a doofus if it doesn't work, and REALLY wanting something to happen that is not happening with proper diet and tons of exercise. I'll let y'all know what happens, if anything, in 2 weeks time.. if you are interested. Also, I confess that I am spending money on this crapshoot because I am too scared to go under the knife for lipo.

dandan83

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_confessions-19?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:cf333eaf-c26b-4f23-8fd9-50bf18e5dd54Post:8e96463f-7a67-4476-bad8-3ce5312218fd">Re: Confessions</a>:
[QUOTE]Ok, I've got another ex related confession. FI's biggest relationship before me was with a girl who is basically my polar opposite. She's a really smart girl, extremely well traveled, has a degree in Russian lit and just got accepted to LSU law school. (yeah I friended her on FB, whatever. We were acquaintances before FI and I started dating) Anyway, she has been working in New Orleans, but now she's going to be back in our city. I'm not scared FI wants her or anything. It's just that she has more degrees than I do and seemingly has her life more together than I do and it makes me insecure. I don't want to share a city with her. I know FI loves me and has zero desire to even speak to this girl, but I feel irrationally jealous and territorial.
Posted by laurenclaire1386[/QUOTE]

I think it's pretty normal to feel that way and I don't blame you. It bothers me sometimes that my BF is friends with the ex he used to live with. I'm trying not to be all psycho stalker with him tho. lol I have been known to check e-mail/phones and ride by houses to check up on what's going on.

AlexiaANDRobert

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_confessions-19?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:cf333eaf-c26b-4f23-8fd9-50bf18e5dd54Post:f616afa4-60a9-4458-89c0-999d9e7a6ef2">Re: Confessions</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Confessions : It did! While I was crying, in fact! I'm just a big ole blubbery, emotional mess right now, and you hit a nerve. There's someshit going on right now that I won't get into, but it's nice to read all you girls' random comments about my parenting and outlook on days when I feel like a big, fat failure. It helps more than you'll ever know.
Posted by BecW2be[/QUOTE]

I'm gonna send Manda a virtual head smack...

sweetpea0911

Bec, can I just tell you that I find you to be one of the most inspirational people on this board.  I wish I had an older sister just like you (because I know you're a mom and a rocking one at that, but I see you more as the awesome older sister person).

Confession: I stalked my old boyfriend who was absuive.  He cheated on me and finally beat the $hit outta me on my birthday and left to go live with that woman and her son.  Two weeks ago, she smartened up, threw him out and had him arrested for assault.  I sent her a congratulations card and cracked open a bottle of wine with FI to celebrate.  It was a good night.

Stackeye210

Bec - you need to trust yourself more.  You're way too awesome to be second guessing yourself and feeling like a failure! 

laurenclaire1386

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_confessions-19?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:cf333eaf-c26b-4f23-8fd9-50bf18e5dd54Post:53753f19-b3d7-49b9-99b4-9adceeee9f1a">Re: Confessions</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Confessions : I think it's pretty normal to feel that way and I don't blame you. It bothers me sometimes that my BF is friends with the ex he used to live with. I'm trying not to be all psycho stalker with him tho. lol I have been known to check e-mail/phones and ride by houses to check up on what's going on.
Posted by dandan83[/QUOTE]

Thanks. It's nice to hear that I'm not a complete nutjob.

nhelene

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_confessions-19?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:cf333eaf-c26b-4f23-8fd9-50bf18e5dd54Post:c46f59b4-380b-49fd-87b7-115a9140db54">Re: Confessions</a>:
[QUOTE] Never feel like less of a success because someone close appears further along. You just never know. :)
Posted by BecW2be[/QUOTE]

My FI gets upset about this A LOT.  His job sucks, while he keeps comparing himself to his PHD older brother and lots of others, including me.  He also seems pretty upset that a lot of his friends managed to buy houses last year when the market was great for it, and he sees it as a real missed opportunity.

arbolita

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_confessions-19?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:cf333eaf-c26b-4f23-8fd9-50bf18e5dd54Post:12307e42-8fbe-4874-a7d0-86599325c601">Re: Confessions</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Confessions : I confess that I had my first Zerona laser treatment yesterday. I am waivering between fear that its a huge waste of money and I will look like a doofus if it doesn't work, and REALLY wanting something to happen that is not happening with proper diet and tons of exercise. I'll let y'all know what happens, if anything, in 2 weeks time.. if you are interested. Also, I confess that I am spending money on this crapshoot because I am too scared to go under the knife for lipo.
Posted by SarahPLiz[/QUOTE]

Definitely post (or PM me) an update. 

BecW2be

Aw, thank you girls so much. I didn't mean to send out the "pat me on the ass!" batsignal. Everything will be fine, and I know I'm doing the right thing, but let me tell you it's SO MUCH harder to let your kids fall on their asses than it is to stand behind them and catch them, even if falling is the right thing to let them do.

mwhitson14

I confess that my life is really boring right now and I have nothing to confess.

Other than I was praying that our sex life would get better after getting married, but it hasn't. The sex is better, but the frequency sucks.