unpopular opinions?

aprovencher21

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_unpopular-opinions-7?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:fade0848-bd76-4130-94f7-582a263d78a4Post:ce519602-3685-4e27-8063-95e99a390eb7">Re: unpopular opinions?</a>:
[QUOTE]thanks :) I will check it out
Posted by laladypoet[/QUOTE]

=) I'm just a little weird about it since I did a study in undergrad in terms of brain development.

I don't think all spankings cause such significant problems.....but just like all drinking during pregnancy doesn't cause problems I wouldn't take a chance.

georgia_bride09

But see, for every study that says spanking is harmful, there's one that says it isn't. So to read one set and not the other would leave you with only half the picture.  

aprovencher21

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_unpopular-opinions-7?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:fade0848-bd76-4130-94f7-582a263d78a4Post:48beb7d1-d710-4db1-abb3-1a61b94723cf">Re: unpopular opinions?</a>:
[QUOTE]But see, for every study that says spanking is harmful, there's one that says it isn't. So to read one set and not the other would leave you with only half the picture.  
Posted by georgia_bride09[/QUOTE]

Oh I agree!  I have a ton of reviews of the other side....I just didn't want to clog this thread and over post. 

alehayes

A summary of a book about spanking: http://www.psychpage.com/family/library/spank.htm

An article (with opposition) from the New York Daily News: http://www.nydailynews.com/lifestyle/2010/01/04/2010-01-04_spanking_makes_kids_perform_better_in_school_study.html

Now I'm not saying I'm going to spank my kids (I'm hoping to discipline them effectively enough that it won't be necessary).  And I'm not saying these studies are even correct.  They're just something we talked about at a training I went to, and something we touched upon lightly in my CDA class. 

I can't personally testify to the merits of it really, because until the age of five, I lived with my mom, and she only ever spanked me once (I cut the phone cord while she was talking).  After that I lived with my dad, and I was spanked much more often, frequently for things that weren't even my fault.  I've had a paddle brush, two paddles (one of which was quite large), a hanger and the sole of a shoe broken on my butt, and that's in addition to the hands, belts and remotes i got spanked with.  Spanking never really taught me a lesson (because really, when you're twelve, spanking just seems dumb); it mostly just taught me to be smarter and not get caught doing whatever I had gotten in trouble for in the first place.

I just know a lot of preschoolers who need SOME form of discipline at home, because "Buddybear, please don't do that" isn't cutting it.

aprovencher21

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_unpopular-opinions-7?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:fade0848-bd76-4130-94f7-582a263d78a4Post:549e32f1-8e2d-43e7-a383-e43545e0f119">Re: unpopular opinions?</a>:
[QUOTE]A summary of a book about spanking: <a href="http://www.psychpage.com/family/library/spank.htm" rel="nofollow">http://www.psychpage.com/family/library/spank.htm</a> An article (with opposition) from the New York Daily News: <a href="http://www.nydailynews.com/lifestyle/2010/01/04/2010-01-04_spanking_makes_kids_perform_better_in_school_study.html" rel="nofollow">http://www.nydailynews.com/lifestyle/2010/01/04/2010-01-04_spanking_makes_kids_perform_better_in_school_study.html</a> Now I'm not saying I'm going to spank my kids (I'm hoping to discipline them effectively enough that it won't be necessary).  And I'm not saying these studies are even correct.  They're just something we talked about at a training I went to, and something we touched upon lightly in my CDA class.  I can't personally testify to the merits of it really, because until the age of five, I lived with my mom, and she only ever spanked me once (I cut the phone cord while she was talking).  After that I lived with my dad, and I was spanked much more often, frequently for things that weren't even my fault.  I've had a paddle brush, two paddles (one of which was quite large), a hanger and the sole of a shoe broken on my butt, and that's in addition to the hands, belts and remotes i got spanked with.  Spanking never really taught me a lesson (because really, when you're twelve, spanking just seems dumb); it mostly just taught me to be smarter and not get caught doing whatever I had gotten in trouble for in the first place. <font color="#800080">I just know a lot of preschoolers who need SOME form of discipline at home, because "Buddybear, please don't do that" isn't cutting it.
</font>Posted by alehayes[/QUOTE]

That I agree with.  Parents are definitely not disciplining their kids.  I wasn't spanked but I knew I would be very unhappy if I didn't behave.

I'm sorry for what you went through with your dad.

alehayes

I agree.  That was one of the reasons I always said I didn't believe in spanking.  But after working with so many young children, I can understand why people do, and I think there are a few kids who need it.  I honestly think just one would be enough for most children.  I just don't think it should be carried out to the extent that people carry  it.  Just a swat, when the kid is fully clothed.  No belts or paddles or bare butts or anything.  Also, I  think if you're going to spank a child, you need to calm down yourself first so you don't end up hurting the child out of your own rage.  That's where a lot of people go overboard. 

I guess I just think there's a right way to spank and a wrong way to spank, and I think most people spank the wrong way.

mica178

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_unpopular-opinions-7?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:fade0848-bd76-4130-94f7-582a263d78a4Post:e6f806ef-f756-458b-b987-48977f55460f">Re: unpopular opinions?</a>:
[QUOTE]I agree.  That was one of the reasons I always said I didn't believe in spanking.  But after working with so many young children, I can understand why people do, and I think there are a few kids who need it.  I honestly think just one would be enough for most children.  I just don't think it should be carried out to the extent that people carry  it.  Just a swat, when the kid is fully clothed.  No belts or paddles or bare butts or anything.  Also, I  think if you're going to spank a child, you need to calm down yourself first so you don't end up hurting the child out of your own rage.  That's where a lot of people go overboard.  I guess I just think there's a right way to spank and a wrong way to spank, and I think most people spank the wrong way.
Posted by alehayes[/QUOTE]

Yup.  I think a lot of parenting problems is that people are still reacting when they dole out the punishment, so things get out of control.  I don't have an inherent problem with spanking, but there are a lot of parents who cross the line.

My father never hit us kids, but his "talkings to" were 50 times worse than my mother's irrational spanking.

ootmother2

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_unpopular-opinions-7?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:fade0848-bd76-4130-94f7-582a263d78a4Post:b77d3201-bb25-4c40-aed3-74b1b2991e96">Re: unpopular opinions?</a>:
[QUOTE]I hope I was right on the summarizing of what Mery was saying.  I think that's what she was getting at.  Though, I can't think of a single eastern state that hasn't voted blue in... I don't know how long.  NY might have a Republican governor, but it doesn't go red for the presidency.
Posted by AmoroAgain[/QUOTE]

the govenor of New York is a democrat.  as usual

fangsiting

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_unpopular-opinions-7?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:fade0848-bd76-4130-94f7-582a263d78a4Post:c40d6b83-2800-4046-8a9e-9ccb8a1de3ae">Re: unpopular opinions?</a>:
[QUOTE]My unpopular opinion:  I despise PETA with every bone in my body.  How can you claim to be "People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals" when you'd rather euthanize perfectly healthy animals then be bothered advertising & marketing these animals for adoptions?  It makes me sick.  <a href="http://www.petakillsanimals.com/" rel="nofollow">http://www.petakillsanimals.com/</a>
Posted by pinkpinot[/QUOTE]

I disagree with a lot of PETA's tactics.  The extremism is certainly effective in capturing people's attention, but it also makes a lot of people hate them.  However, the organization behind petakillsanimals.com is the Center for Consumer Freedom, which is a lobbying organization for fast food, meat and tabacco.  PETA is a threat to the money behind CCF.  There might be some true statements on that website, but just be aware that the lobbying group behind that website has a clear agenda and it is NOT the protection of animals. 

More info on CCF:

<a href="http://www.nytimes.com/2005/07/24/opinion/24sun3.html?_r=1" target="_blank">http://www.nytimes.com/2005/07/24/opinion/24sun3.html?_r=1</a>

<a href="http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2005/04/26/AR2005042601259.html" target="_blank">http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2005/04/26/AR2005042601259.html</a>

laladypoet

well, hell.

ootmother2

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_unpopular-opinions-7?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:fade0848-bd76-4130-94f7-582a263d78a4Post:769fe755-7ccc-4f60-a330-359cda0b511b">Re: unpopular opinions?</a>:
[QUOTE]I am not proud to be an American.  If it didn't make more financial sense for FI to move here for the time being, I would love to emigrate to Canada. so you want to use america for financial benefit but arent proud to be here?  get out then.
Posted by Calypso1977[/QUOTE]


That's pretty fuuucking rude calypso!

nfp147

Spanking is not illegal in Canada.

andy71781

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_unpopular-opinions-7?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:fade0848-bd76-4130-94f7-582a263d78a4Post:3a6a0598-9d4f-43ed-b946-9aecd2ad5298">Re: unpopular opinions?</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: unpopular opinions? : That's pretty fuuucking rude calypso!
Posted by ootmother2[/QUOTE]
I have read through this entire post and this is the opinion that I agree with the most.

CaseyandSalley

mmm all this talk about pie makes me crave pumpkin pie bad!

I was spanked with a belt a switch a hand paddle or hands, Im not screwed up, turned out just fine

Opinions are like Aholes everybodys got one =0)