My fience's sister got engaged 10 days before my wedding!

LHolliday13

I love my soon to be in laws!!! All of them!!! I loooove my soon to be sister in law! But my wedding is in 10 DAYS! And last night her boyfriend of 7 months proposed! 10 days before my wedding!!?!?!?!?! Dating 7 months!?!?!?! Are you serious!?!?! She's 21 and still in college. He works for minimum wage at a hardware store... It's not like they are established!!!

Do I have the right to be irritated!?!?!

photokitty

No - but I can understand why you would be. You and your FI will still be the focus of your wedding. Just be gracious and congratulate her. Then make sure you get a photo with his family that does not include him, just in case ;-)

KeptInStitches

Nope. You get one day. I promise that you and your FI will be the center of attention at your wedding.

And you sound kind of judgy - for all you know, they're planning a long engagement.

MNVegas

So what does your FSIL engagement have to do with your wedding? You have a right to be happy for her. You do not have a right to judge her relationship.

AlexisA01

Relax..... people can  get engaged  any time they  would like.  Don't judge their  relationship, it's not your place.No,  you don't  have  the right to  be irritated.  Their engagement wont make your wedding suffer.

grumbledore

LHolliday13 said:

I love my soon to be in laws!!! All of them!!! I loooove my soon to be sister in law! But my wedding is in 10 DAYS! And last night her boyfriend of 7 months proposed! 10 days before my wedding!!?!?!?!?! Dating 7 months!?!?!?! Are you serious!?!?! She's 21 and still in college. He works for minimum wage at a hardware store... It's not like they are established!!!

Do I have the right to be irritated!?!?!

Nope.  You sound insane.

Salsera29

No, you don't. They are not under any obligation to put their lives on hold because you are getting married. 10 days before your wedding is not your wedding day. If he proposed to her at your reception, that might be a different story. 

NYCBruin

LHolliday13 said:

I love my soon to be in laws!!! All of them!!! I loooove my soon to be sister in law! But my wedding is in 10 DAYS! And last night her boyfriend of 7 months proposed! 10 days before my wedding!!?!?!?!?! Dating 7 months!?!?!?! Are you serious!?!?! She's 21 and still in college. He works for minimum wage at a hardware store... It's not like they are established!!!

Do I have the right to be irritated!?!?!

Yeah, you have no right to be upset.  Your wedding day will still be all about you, I promise.

And ditto PPs, you sound a little judgy about their relationship.  

KickAssMOH

Who cares where he works or how long they've been together? You need to put your judgy face aside and be happy for them. Resist the urge to speak poorly of them to the rest of your bridal party/family/guests because that will make you look just as petty and selfish as this post does.

My best friend's Aunt got engaged AT her rehearsal dinner. Sometimes people you love just do things that you need to accept, show a happy-face for, and move on from. Their engagement has nothing to do with your wedding, and I'm sure that they will focus on you for your special day.

LHolliday13

Not being judgmental at all. I just know my soon to be sister in law very well. She just got out of a 3 year long relationship about 10 months ago and this guy is just a fake. I couldn't love her more. Him on the other hand... He acts like he and I are in a competition to see which one my mother and father in law will like better. I am irritated so now all the things I don't like about him are magnified. I'm pretty sure he could have waited until after my fiancé and I were married.

kefryar

wow. be happy for her, it's not as if she planned to get engaged, and she's not planning her wedding near yours. relax.

STARMOON44

Why would he care about the fact that you're getting married in 10 days? Only you do.

LHolliday13

Listen people it's not her I'm mad at. So chill out!

Swazzle

No, you don't have the right to be irritated. They can get engaged whenever they want, it has nothing to do with you or your wedding.

What does his occupation have to do with anything?

KeptInStitches

Well, @lholliday13, just remember that you can't say anything where it could get back to her. To paraphrase Christopher Titus, Hallmark doesn't make a "sorry-I-said-your-FI-was-a-bad-idea" card.

Salsera29

LHolliday13 said:

Listen people it's not her I'm mad at. So chill out!

You chill the fuck out. YOU came on here crying about your FSIL getting engaged. YOU asked, "Do I have the right to be irritated??!?!" We answered you. You're welcome. 

Now I'm pissed. 

WonderRed

Am I really the only one thinking this one is MUD?


It has to be because if it's for real my head is going to explode.

grumbledore

Listen people it's not her I'm mad at. So chill out!

Um, you asked if you were in the right to be upset. We answered. So you chill out.

LHolliday13

I'm not the only one unhappy about the engagement. His parents aren't happy. My fiancé isn't happy. Her boyfriend is fake and that's probably the thing I'm not happy about. If it were another guy I'm sure I would be thrilled and over there tonight giving her my wedding magazines.

I guess I shouldn't be mad about the engagement, bc it's the boy she's marrying I'm not happy about...

And honestly people, before you tell me how petty I am. Remember I'm not the one judging a complete stranger. I reserve my judgment for people I know.

I didn't post on here or people to tell me how terrible I am. I was looking for advice on how to handle it. There is no reason for you to attack me

melbelleup

Nope... no reason to be mad. Proposals happen on any day any time. Someone is most likely going to get proposed to on your wedding day... sure you might not have them at your wedding, but someone will be proposed to. Be happy for her, which it sounds like you are, and go back to focusing on your wedding.

LHolliday13

Thank you for not answering the question, and not being mean about it. Geez!

kmmssg

There is nothing for you to  handle.  I don't understand why you ask that - you are getting married in 10 days so focus on that.  She will either figure out he sucks or she will marry him.  Not in your control so just let it go.

melbelleup

LHolliday13 said:

Not being judgmental at all. I just know my soon to be sister in law very well. She just got out of a 3 year long relationship about 10 months ago and this guy is just a fake. I couldn't love her more. Him on the other hand... He acts like he and I are in a competition to see which one my mother and father in law will like better. I am irritated so now all the things I don't like about him are magnified. I'm pretty sure he could have waited until after my fiancé and I were married.

This right here is judgement. You don't know her fiance like she knows her fiance. If she didn't want to get married to him, she wouldn't of accepted. Get over not liking him because he will be at every holiday and birthday just like you.

WonderRed

LHolliday13 said:

 could have waited until after my fiancé and I were married.

Yep. MUD.  No one suddenly goes from spelling it the wrong way like it was originally done to suddenly getting it right, complete with French accents in 20 minutes when no one has pointed the original misspelling out.

*yawn*

Salsera29

melbelleup

LHolliday13 said:

Thank you for not answering the question, and not being mean about it. Geez!

Also, I haven't seen one person not answer your question if you deserve to be mad about the engagement being 10 days from your wedding. You never said anything else in your first post. Granted, some people told you in a not so friendly way, but they still answered it.

NYCBruin

LHolliday13 said:

I'm not the only one unhappy about the engagement. His parents aren't happy. My fiancé isn't happy. Her boyfriend is fake and that's probably the thing I'm not happy about. If it were another guy I'm sure I would be thrilled and over there tonight giving her my wedding magazines.

I guess I shouldn't be mad about the engagement, bc it's the boy she's marrying I'm not happy about...

And honestly people, before you tell me how petty I am. Remember I'm not the one judging a complete stranger. I reserve my judgment for people I know.

I didn't post on here or people to tell me how terrible I am. I was looking for advice on how to handle it. There is no reason for you to attack me

If you had posted "FI's sister just got engaged, and the guy is a loser" and expressed that you had concerns about his character and that no one really liked the guy and asked for advice on how to handle THAT, you would have gotten much different responses.

But you didn't, you just posted that you were mad that someone got engaged 10 days before the wedding.  And that makes me think that you're really more concerned about this overshadowing your day.

LHolliday13

Ok never mind you guys are weird and not helpful at all... You yell at me for caring about people I know but I don't know you and make your head want to explode? That's super weird.

LHolliday13

NYCBruin said:

LHolliday13 said:

I'm not the only one unhappy about the engagement. His parents aren't happy. My fiancé isn't happy. Her boyfriend is fake and that's probably the thing I'm not happy about. If it were another guy I'm sure I would be thrilled and over there tonight giving her my wedding magazines.

I guess I shouldn't be mad about the engagement, bc it's the boy she's marrying I'm not happy about...

And honestly people, before you tell me how petty I am. Remember I'm not the one judging a complete stranger. I reserve my judgment for people I know.

I didn't post on here or people to tell me how terrible I am. I was looking for advice on how to handle it. There is no reason for you to attack me

If you had posted "FI's sister just got engaged, and the guy is a loser" and expressed that you had concerns about his character and that no one really liked the guy and asked for advice on how to handle THAT, you would have gotten much different responses.

But you didn't, you just posted that you were mad that someone got engaged 10 days before the wedding.  And that makes me think that you're really more concerned about this overshadowing your day.

Perhaps, I mean people think, It's 10 days before my wedding, I'm super stressed. I don't like the guy... And everything he does makes me mad.... So with wedding stress and now this news... I'm a little crazy. Ok? But honestly? Why get to mad? Cussing my out and such? Really? That's a little nonsense. Don't attack people. My lands

loves2shop4shoes

HOW DARE SHE STEAL YOUR THUNDER!

(sarcasm)

No, you do not have a RIGHT to be annoyed.  She's allowed to get engaged whenever she wants.

I would tell you not to judge, but frankly, it's human nature to have opinions about things.  In your shoes, I would side eye the hell out of her engagement to a guy she's been dating 7 months, when she's only 21.  That being said, just because it doesn't seem like the best option doesn't mean that you CAN or SHOULD publicly say a WORD about it.

Be gracious.  Be polite.  Congratulate her.  And keep your inner 14 year old footstomper in check. 

Nicmorrison14

No right to be irritated. We are getting married in 9 months and my best friend's (MOH and basically sister) boyfriend asked if it would be okay for him to purpose to her this fall. I thought it was considerate he asked since it's "our wedding time" but who am I to say no its not. Of course he can! i'm thrilled for them. The day of your weddng will be about YOU and your FI... not about an engagement that just happened. People may ask her about it when talking to her privately, but it certainly will not be all about her. How many people will really care if shes engaged or not? Focus on your wedding and not her "drama" if that's how you see it. Whether they make it or not shouldn't concern you. Be there for her either way.