We ARE having a cash bar! & We ARE sending reception invites only!

MomoftheBriade · August 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_we-are-having-a-cash-bar-we-are-sending-reception-invites-only?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:85575f50-825e-48ca-a125-aa149cdbee3ePost:2fdfa23c-58fc-4a38-aefc-6b60f506cc72">Re: We ARE having a cash bar! & We ARE sending reception invites only!</a>:
[QUOTE]I smell troll.
Posted by Carson386[/QUOTE]

I guess you should shower then. Why are you all being so mean about it?

NOLAbridealmost · August 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_we-are-having-a-cash-bar-we-are-sending-reception-invites-only?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:85575f50-825e-48ca-a125-aa149cdbee3ePost:d045109d-9ede-4f9c-a78c-5194aa3a4b0f">Re: We ARE having a cash bar! & We ARE sending reception invites only!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: We ARE having a cash bar! & We ARE sending reception invites only! : That is not true and not allowed in our church.
Posted by MomoftheBriade[/QUOTE]

<div>Let's not get sidetracked here. There's nothing wrong with not living together before marriage, and there are definitely religions and people that don't approve of cohabitation before marriage. But that is strictly a matter of a person's individual morals and have nothing to do with etiquette. </div><div>
</div><div>That said, it's illogical and jerky of you to assume that someone who doesn't share the same personal conviction as you can't give proper etiquette advice. They are not one and the same.</div>

crash2729 · August 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_we-are-having-a-cash-bar-we-are-sending-reception-invites-only?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:85575f50-825e-48ca-a125-aa149cdbee3ePost:852045bc-efa5-42ed-9f36-82a2d7fbecd0">Re: We ARE having a cash bar! & We ARE sending reception invites only!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: We ARE having a cash bar! & We ARE sending reception invites only! : So, it is OK to wish bad luck on young ladies(saying my DD will be divorced), it is ok to want me to be unhappy after all of this , it is ok to name call and be mean. But it is NOT ok, to invite DD works pale to the reception only? Please explain where you get this from.
Posted by MomoftheBriade[/QUOTE]
Nobody called you names until you started insulting peoples morals. <div>
</div><div>BTW, I don't think you're real anyway...so I'm not sure why I'm still giving real advice like it matters.</div>

Viczaesar · August 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_we-are-having-a-cash-bar-we-are-sending-reception-invites-only?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:85575f50-825e-48ca-a125-aa149cdbee3ePost:852045bc-efa5-42ed-9f36-82a2d7fbecd0">Re: We ARE having a cash bar! & We ARE sending reception invites only!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: We ARE having a cash bar! & We ARE sending reception invites only! : So, it is OK to wish bad luck on young ladies(saying my DD will be divorced), it is ok to want me to be unhappy after all of this , it is ok to name call and be mean. But it is NOT ok, to invite DD works pale to the reception only? Please explain where you get this from.
Posted by MomoftheBriade[/QUOTE]
You really need to work on your reading comprehension skills.

Gabrielle76 · August 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_we-are-having-a-cash-bar-we-are-sending-reception-invites-only?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:85575f50-825e-48ca-a125-aa149cdbee3ePost:d045109d-9ede-4f9c-a78c-5194aa3a4b0f">Re: We ARE having a cash bar! & We ARE sending reception invites only!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: We ARE having a cash bar! & We ARE sending reception invites only! : That is not true and not allowed in our church.
Posted by MomoftheBriade[/QUOTE]

On the off chance that you're not a troll. Yes, it is true. Many studies have shown that living together before getting married makes it less likely that the couple will get divorced. If you feel like ignoring current psychological data, that's your business, but it's not relevant to the etiquette discussion at hand. I NEVER said your daughter will get divorced. Good luck with your wedding, and I hope your daughters marriage is happy, long, and prosperous.

Carson386 · August 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_we-are-having-a-cash-bar-we-are-sending-reception-invites-only?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:85575f50-825e-48ca-a125-aa149cdbee3ePost:e955a54e-b1e4-4dad-8546-710e03520544">Re: We ARE having a cash bar! & We ARE sending reception invites only!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: We ARE having a cash bar! & We ARE sending reception invites only! : I guess you should shower then. Why are you all being so mean about it?
Posted by MomoftheBriade[/QUOTE]

I don't have to be a troll- I have enough things in my life to keep me occupied and happy. You are just trying to stir up drama (hence the troll thing). The wedding boards are for people that are actually getting married or have real families/friends that are getting married, not to start drama. Let me guess, his mom wants to wear white and nobody is responding properly to the RSVP cards either?
And if this whole situation was real, I still think your rude and would not go to anything for this. I also would <strong>not</strong> wish for anything such as divorce though.

OurMrsReynolds · August 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_we-are-having-a-cash-bar-we-are-sending-reception-invites-only?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:85575f50-825e-48ca-a125-aa149cdbee3ePost:852045bc-efa5-42ed-9f36-82a2d7fbecd0">Re: We ARE having a cash bar! & We ARE sending reception invites only!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: We ARE having a cash bar! & We ARE sending reception invites only! : So, it is OK to wish bad luck on young ladies(saying my DD will be divorced), it is ok to want me to be unhappy after all of this , it is ok to name call and be mean. But it is NOT ok, to invite DD works pale to the reception only? Please explain where you get this from.
Posted by MomoftheBriade[/QUOTE]

I understand that you are upset right now and probably are typing a little faster than normal at this particular moment but in the name of all that is pure I could barely understand your post. You are already brutalizing ettiquite rules that have been passed from generation to generation but must the English language also suffer?

MomoftheBriade · August 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_we-are-having-a-cash-bar-we-are-sending-reception-invites-only?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:85575f50-825e-48ca-a125-aa149cdbee3ePost:e35ebe7c-83b5-4139-bd2a-8ae760e3952b">Re: We ARE having a cash bar! & We ARE sending reception invites only!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: We ARE having a cash bar! & We ARE sending reception invites only! : You really need to work on your reading comprehension skills.
Posted by Viczaesar[/QUOTE]

I dont agree, I am real a regular mom on a budget and lots of the brides pals wanted to come after work and say hi. So we came up with this. Looking to talk kindly to someone else about this, not be reading the "c" word in this board or wishing divorce on DD. Or wishing that my friends bad mouth me. That is insane and hurtful. nothing I have done or said has been hurtful to you people. I am just explaining what is really happeneing here.

Gabrielle76 · August 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_we-are-having-a-cash-bar-we-are-sending-reception-invites-only?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:85575f50-825e-48ca-a125-aa149cdbee3ePost:e77228ee-6d1c-4485-87ee-4bf6725c9d6b">Re: We ARE having a cash bar! & We ARE sending reception invites only!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: We ARE having a cash bar! & We ARE sending reception invites only! : I dont agree, I am real a regular mom on a budget and lots of the brides pals wanted to come after work and say hi. So we came up with this. Looking to talk kindly to someone else about this, not be reading the "c" word in this board or <strong>wishing divorce on DD</strong>. Or wishing that my friends bad mouth me. That is insane and hurtful. nothing I have done or said has been hurtful to you people. I am just explaining what is really happeneing here.
Posted by MomoftheBriade[/QUOTE]

I'm sorry, NO ONE wished divorce on your daughter. THAT would be horribly rude, but it didn't happen. No wonder you're getting offended if you're able to read the forum and imagian things that never happened.

Viczaesar · August 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_we-are-having-a-cash-bar-we-are-sending-reception-invites-only?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:85575f50-825e-48ca-a125-aa149cdbee3ePost:e77228ee-6d1c-4485-87ee-4bf6725c9d6b">Re: We ARE having a cash bar! & We ARE sending reception invites only!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: We ARE having a cash bar! & We ARE sending reception invites only! : I dont agree, I am real a regular mom on a budget and lots of the brides pals wanted to come after work and say hi. So we came up with this. Looking to talk kindly to someone else about this, not be reading the "c" word in this board or wishing divorce on DD. Or wishing that my friends bad mouth me. That is insane and hurtful. nothing I have done or said has been hurtful to you people. I am just explaining what is really happeneing here.
Posted by MomoftheBriade[/QUOTE]
AGAIN, you need to work on your reading comprehension skills.

NOLAbridealmost · August 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_we-are-having-a-cash-bar-we-are-sending-reception-invites-only?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:85575f50-825e-48ca-a125-aa149cdbee3ePost:e77228ee-6d1c-4485-87ee-4bf6725c9d6b">Re: We ARE having a cash bar! & We ARE sending reception invites only!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: We ARE having a cash bar! & We ARE sending reception invites only! : I dont agree, I am real a regular mom on a budget and lots of the brides pals wanted to come after work and say hi. So we came up with this. Looking to talk kindly to someone else about this, not be reading the "c" word in this board or wishing divorce on DD. Or wishing that my friends bad mouth me. That is insane and hurtful. nothing I have done or said has been hurtful to you people.<strong> I am just explaining what is really happeneing here.</strong>
Posted by MomoftheBriade[/QUOTE]

<div>Really? You don't seem to be understanding what's really happening here. Let me help you out: </div><div>
</div><div>1) You arrived and boldly pronounced that your solution to your wedding budget problems is to do a whole bunch of really rude things; </div><div>
</div><div>2) We explained that your ideas were rude and warned you that the people you've run your ideas by in real life are likely just trying to be polite to your face but are going to think that you're being rude. Because you are. No one wishes them to think you're being rude; we actually are trying to help you avoid that by not doing what you're planning to do.</div><div>
</div><div>3) You tried to say that it's okay for you to be rude because we MUST have done other rude things like include registry info on invitations. This was both illogical and incorrect as we then explained that we actually haven't done other rude things and even if we did, that's irrelevant. </div><div>
</div><div>4) You took a cheap shot and assumed we were all "immoral cohabitators" whose advice isn't worth taking because we're terrible people.</div><div>
</div><div>5) I introduced you to the phrase thundercvnt (you're welcome, btw, because it's an awesome word) at no point calling you the "c" word. </div>

willywally5 · August 2012

But you aren't LISTENING. Basically, it seems like you just wanted someone to tell you all of this is OK. But from an etiquette standpoint, it's not. So you aren't going to get a big thumbs up, go for it here. Inviting people to the reception later after the meal is done is rude; either they are your guests for the whole shebang or they aren't. Cash bars are generally considered rude, even though your daughter isn't of age. Either have a dry reception or host what you can afford. If that's a couple of kegs and that's it, so be it.

crash2729 · August 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_we-are-having-a-cash-bar-we-are-sending-reception-invites-only?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:85575f50-825e-48ca-a125-aa149cdbee3ePost:e77228ee-6d1c-4485-87ee-4bf6725c9d6b">Re: We ARE having a cash bar! & We ARE sending reception invites only!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: We ARE having a cash bar! & We ARE sending reception invites only! : I dont agree, <strong> I am real a regular mom on a budget and lots of the brides pals wanted to come after work and say hi</strong>. So we came up with this. <strong>Looking to talk kindly to someone else about this</strong>, not be reading the "c" word in this board or wishing divorce on DD. Or wishing that my friends bad mouth me. That is insane and hurtful. nothing I have done or said has been hurtful to you people. I am just explaining what is really happeneing here.
Posted by MomoftheBriade[/QUOTE]
Then maybe your DD should be hosting something after at her place OR "hey friends we'll be at XYZ after the wedding, you should swing by after work if you want"<div>
</div><div>You insulted peoples morals as an excuse for your own rude behaviors. I highly doubt you came in here looking for a "kind conversation". ALSO, no one wished that your friends would talk about you behind your back, just let you know that they probably were already.</div>

crash2729 · August 2012

http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_yikes-if-the-etiquette-board-gals-dont-like-ur-idea-they-with-you-bad_.0

Cute OP.

NOLAbridealmost · August 2012

OP is Klassy.

banana468 · August 2012

I love it when I can tell that great manners will be passed on from one generation to the next.

willywally5 · August 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_we-are-having-a-cash-bar-we-are-sending-reception-invites-only?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:85575f50-825e-48ca-a125-aa149cdbee3ePost:2ffea54f-a81f-4746-9a58-c38d57e56014">Re: We ARE having a cash bar! & We ARE sending reception invites only!</a>:
[QUOTE]I love it when I can tell that great manners will be passed on from one generation to the next.
Posted by banana468[/QUOTE]

<div>A gift that keeps on giving. Kind of like herpes. </div><div>
</div><div>
</div>

Lisa50 · August 2012

I married -- for the second time -- just a year ago. I have a lot of fresh wedding planning memories. Someday, I will likely be the MOG (my son is 19) so I have a bit in common with you.

First of all, neither set of parents are responsible for paying for any wedding expenses. PP put it well. There is a difference -- a big difference -- between tradition and responsibility. IMHO, the bride and groom should pay for their wedding. Planning and bearing the expense for a wedding can be a growth experience. If my son walked in the door tomorrow to tell me he's getting married, my expectation would be that he and his bride bear the expenses. Period.

Second, no matter who is paying for the reception, with a bride who is UNDERAGE, there should be no bar. I don't know the law in Minneapolis, but I'd be willing to bet you would be held responsible for underage alcohol consumption. Don't have a bar at all.

Finally, everyone invited to the wedding should be invited to the reception. Honestly, if you insist on hosting this event, host only what you can afford. Otherwise, hand the reins over to your daughter and future son-in-law, so they can plan and host what they can afford.

wrigleyville · August 2012

Okay, now I'm pissed off.

Newsflash: not living together before marriage does not prevent two people from having sex. Just because she is not living with him does not mean she is "virtuous" or any better than those of us who chose to live with our FIs before getting married.

crash2729 · August 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_we-are-having-a-cash-bar-we-are-sending-reception-invites-only?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:85575f50-825e-48ca-a125-aa149cdbee3ePost:982b5b44-e972-49a0-a26e-cb7496ab28fe">Re: We ARE having a cash bar! & We ARE sending reception invites only!</a>:
[QUOTE]Okay, now I'm pissed off. Newsflash: not living together before marriage does not prevent two people from having sex. Just because she is not living with him does not mean she is "virtuous" or any better than those of us who chose to live with our FIs before getting married.
Posted by wrigleyville[/QUOTE]
Exactly.

MomoftheBriade · August 2012

Now you "ladies" are making fun of my fake handle on a website. I mentioned to someone that I posted this here, the response was, oh ... they are so mean. Hmm. They did not mean me. Your posts have been quite humorous. And news flash, cash bar is popular around here and will continue to be. Please all of you enjoy your perfect etiquette, your perfect language and making fun of people trying hard to make things work for everyone. I guess if you feel good about yourself talking to and about someone this way, then continue. I really did not think this website was about this.

Unlike you, I wish you all the best.

NOLAbridealmost · August 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_we-are-having-a-cash-bar-we-are-sending-reception-invites-only?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:85575f50-825e-48ca-a125-aa149cdbee3ePost:213fe19c-795a-4696-8460-6e886ee1e0dc">Re: We ARE having a cash bar! & We ARE sending reception invites only!</a>:
[QUOTE]Now you "ladies" are making fun of my fake handle on a website. I mentioned to someone that I posted this here, the response was, oh ... they are so mean. Hmm. They did not mean me. Your posts have been quite humorous. And news flash, cash bar is popular around here and will continue to be. Please all of you enjoy your perfect etiquette, your perfect language and making fun of people trying hard to make things work for everyone. I guess if you feel good about yourself talking to and about someone this way, then continue. I really did not think this website was about this. Unlike you, I wish you all the best.
Posted by MomoftheBriade[/QUOTE].
<div>
</div><div>....<em>And</em> GBCK on post number 90. </div><div>
</div><div>Who wins the pool? </div>

MomoftheBriade · August 2012

And I see the post calling me all the bad words was removed.

crash2729 · August 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_we-are-having-a-cash-bar-we-are-sending-reception-invites-only?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:85575f50-825e-48ca-a125-aa149cdbee3ePost:213fe19c-795a-4696-8460-6e886ee1e0dc">Re: We ARE having a cash bar! & We ARE sending reception invites only!</a>:
[QUOTE]Now you "ladies" are making fun of my fake handle on a website. I mentioned to someone that I posted this here, the response was, oh ... they are so mean. <strong>Hmm. They did not mean me.</strong> Your posts have been quite humorous. And news flash, cash bar is popular around here and will continue to be. Please all of you enjoy your perfect etiquette, your perfect language and making fun of people trying hard to make things work for everyone. I guess if you feel good about yourself talking to and about someone this way, then continue. I really did not think this website was about this. Unlike you, I wish you all the best.
Posted by MomoftheBriade[/QUOTE]
What does this even mean? <div>
</div><div>Just because a cash bar is popular does not make it correct etiquette. </div><div>
</div><div>I also would like to see you respond to wrigley's post. She has a very valid point.</div>

NOLAbridealmost · August 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_we-are-having-a-cash-bar-we-are-sending-reception-invites-only?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:85575f50-825e-48ca-a125-aa149cdbee3ePost:0842747d-fdc9-4f0f-8562-76129cf05abb">Re: We ARE having a cash bar! & We ARE sending reception invites only!</a>:
[QUOTE]And I see the post calling me all the bad words was removed. :)
Posted by MomoftheBriade[/QUOTE]

<div>What posts were those? I can assure you that <em>mine</em> are still there. Although, of course, mine weren't calling you anything. </div>

crash2729 · August 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_we-are-having-a-cash-bar-we-are-sending-reception-invites-only?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:85575f50-825e-48ca-a125-aa149cdbee3ePost:60a606c2-df23-4d76-a437-1f7d34417d9e">Re: We ARE having a cash bar! & We ARE sending reception invites only!</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: We ARE having a cash bar! & We ARE sending reception invites only! : What posts were those? I can assure you that mine are still there. Although, of course, mine weren't calling you anything.
Posted by NOLAbridealmost[/QUOTE]
NOLA FTW.

TheBaney · August 2012

I'm still waiting to hear how my post gives TK a bad name. And where I used foul language.

Lizzieyounce · August 2012

Well bless your heart, OP.

Now, go clutch your pearls over at Wedding Bee.

crash2729 · August 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_we-are-having-a-cash-bar-we-are-sending-reception-invites-only?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:85575f50-825e-48ca-a125-aa149cdbee3ePost:e0e24ade-7b7f-4d14-94a4-c92fc6c06d03">Re: We ARE having a cash bar! & We ARE sending reception invites only!</a>:
[QUOTE]I'm still waiting to hear how my post gives TK a bad name. <strong>And where I used foul language.</strong>
Posted by TheBaney[/QUOTE]
Probably the same place where she got called the C word. <div>In OP lala land.</div>

TheBaney · August 2012

Very true. I think it's pretty sad that people no longer can differentiate between disagreement and hostility.

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