Venting about FI

santana9505 · December 2011

How do I deal with this?? I'm not a crazy/psycho bridezilla, so sorry if one or two of you might think so. I suppose I'll probably get some type of criticism, and sorry if this is annoying but here it goes...

FH and I seem to always make one certain topic an argument...his formal attire. And It's driving me nuts. I met him as a roughneck and I love him as my country boy, wouldn't change him for the world, but I can't ever get him to budge to dress a little nice...only once a year. He even argues with me to look dressed up on our wedding day- although I'm compromising with a camouflage vest & tux coat only for the cermony & pictures, he refuses.

Last Saturday, my work had a large, formal (three piece suits & long dresses for a visual) Christmas Party in a pretty expensive ballroom at a local hotel. Last year, we had the same thing- and all he did was bicker and whine about getting all dressed up, so I told him not to come, but he kept telling me he wanted to come as my date to meet my co-workers.

I bought my awesome cocktail dress, and we went shopping together for something for him to wear, which turned out to be the most miserable shopping trip ever. We went home empty handed with no outfit only a few days away from the party.

His MOTHER (mind you- my FI is 26 years old) took him to pick something out, because she "knows his taste" and they came home with something pretty decent looking. At that point, I really felt like...um, ok...your MOMMY has to take you shopping because you can't dress yourself...?? But I let it go anyways.

He was SO MISERABLE at the Party last year because he felt uncomfortable dressed up. Again, this year he insisted that he wanted to come along. Last Saturday afternoon, as I was getting ready, he put on black beat up jeans with stains on them, and a camouflage button up shirt. I figured he would wear what he wore last year- since those are his ONLY dress clothes in the house. But I didn't feel like arguing so I told him to just stay home.

I had a good time, but it was pretty embarassing when all of my co-workers asked why FI didn't come with me. I feel like I'm marrying a child and I don't know how to deal with it. But apparently his mother knows how.

AllAboutTheBenjamin · December 2011

My ex-boyfriend was a lot like this.

Emphasis on the ex-boyfriend part.

J&K10910 · December 2011

Turn it around and put yourself in his shoes. How would you like it if you HATED dressing up and didn't want to wear a big white wedding dress, and your FI insisted on it...but then "compromised" by saying you could wear an A-line dress instead of a ball gown?

Look, I see where you're coming from. I do. But here's the thing. It's his wedding too. He's uncomfortable dressed up. It's not him. You KNEW THIS. If I were you, I'd be talking to him about what he WOULD be comfortable with,a nd planning a wedding to match that formality. Along the same line, however, he should be wiling to compromise if you are.

dumdumfroggie · December 2011

Honestly, it's a sign of respect towards you to dress appropriately for a work function. If he's not, than frankly I'd take it as disrespect.

And I'd nip the shopping with mommy thing in the butt.

santana9505 · December 2011

I would never "ex" him over this...I love every aspect of him, this is just a, umm....road block? Although the whole compromise of marriage thing comes in, and that just brings up other arguments.. So I guess I'm seeking ways to deal with this whole thing.

For example, I took on every single one of his hobbies for our relationship, and although I love our relationship, he doesn't seem to meet me 50/50 at all times.

dumdumfroggie · December 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_venting-fi?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:0b8c084e-59d3-49d6-89df-094a35fad14bPost:e1dd1778-bf0c-4d85-bc2a-d4f911d4cb87">Re: Venting about FI</a>:
[QUOTE]I would never "ex" him over this...I love every aspect of him, this is just a, umm....road block? Although the whole compromise of marriage thing comes in, and that just brings up other arguments.. So I guess I'm seeking ways to deal with this whole thing. <strong> For example, I took on every single one of his hobbies for our relationship</strong>, and although I love our relationship, he doesn't seem to meet me 50/50 at all times.
Posted by santana9505[/QUOTE]

<div>
</div><div>That's strange. Some separate hobbies are healthy.</div>

J&K10910 · December 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_venting-fi?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:0b8c084e-59d3-49d6-89df-094a35fad14bPost:754e91a7-efa7-45de-96ee-d96f907644e6">Re: Venting about FI</a>:
[QUOTE]Honestly, it's a sign of respect towards you to dress appropriately for a work function. If he's not, than frankly I'd take it as disrespect. And I'd nip the shopping with mommy thing in the butt.
Posted by dumdumfroggie[/QUOTE]

Yeah, the whole trying to put on jeans and shirt when he knew the formality is pretty passive aggressive, I agree with that. If he didn't want to dress up, he just should have said he didn't want to go.

But the main point is the wedding attire, and I stand by what I said for that. Compromise happens on BOTH sides.

lbarr088 · December 2011

Sometimes we do things in life that we don't want to do or aren't comfortable doing, in this instance it is "dressing up" or as I like to call it ... dressing APPROPRIATELY for the event to which you are to attend. This is a part of being a grown up. If mommy still has to dress him because he throws a tantrum every time... I'd be concerned.

FI isn't huge on dressing up but when the occasion calls for it, he dutifully answers.

Did something happen to your FI that has caused him to be this way? Maybe ask mommy dearest how she bribes him to dress appropriately so this wont be an ordeal everytime.

ETA: I wrote the whole doing things we don't want to do before I saw yours Edie!

Great minds think alike.

santana9505 · December 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_venting-fi?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:0b8c084e-59d3-49d6-89df-094a35fad14bPost:56ec52e3-ea10-4d82-b5f7-6209259ecca3">Re: Venting about FI</a>:
[QUOTE]Turn it around and put yourself in his shoes. How would you like it if you HATED dressing up and didn't want to wear a big white wedding dress, and your FI insisted on it...but then "compromised" by saying you could wear an A-line dress instead of a ball gown? Look, I see where you're coming from. I do. But here's the thing. It's his wedding too. He's uncomfortable dressed up. It's not him. You KNEW THIS. If I were you, I'd be talking to him about what he WOULD be comfortable with,a nd planning a wedding to match that formality. <strong>Along the same line, however, he should be wiling to compromise if you are.
</strong>Posted by J&K10910[/QUOTE]

I agree with everything you're saying, here. And my problem is that I know I compromise so much in our relationship. This is honestly all I really ever ask him for. Well...pretty much beg him for.

NuggetBrain · December 2011

I think there's a middle ground between "old black jeans and a camo shirt" and "a tux with tails and tophat" here. If he doesn't like to dress up, fine. But at least throw on some khakis and a polo shirt or a button down. That's not super dressed up. The fact that he won't even do that tells me he has more concern for his own comfort for a few hours than you. And that's bullsh*t.

J&K10910 · December 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_venting-fi?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:0b8c084e-59d3-49d6-89df-094a35fad14bPost:697e5864-c607-4d40-a57b-8dcea03a84d1">Re: Venting about FI</a>:
[QUOTE]I agree with J&K, but <strong>I don't think it's unreasonable of you to expect him to dress up twice a year without him making a fuss. Adults have to do things they don't want to do. It's life.</strong>
Posted by edielaura[/QUOTE]

I agree about this for the party.

But not for the wedding. Weddings don't HAVE to tuxes and ball gowns. It can be whatever they want it to be. Whatever THEY want it to be. Not whatever SHE wants it to be. I'd be pissed if I hated big floofy dresses and my H tried to make me wear one for a day that was about the TWO OF US coming together.

NuggetBrain · December 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_venting-fi?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:0b8c084e-59d3-49d6-89df-094a35fad14bPost:56ec52e3-ea10-4d82-b5f7-6209259ecca3">Re: Venting about FI</a>:
[QUOTE]Turn it around and put yourself in his shoes. How would you like it if you HATED dressing up and didn't want to wear a big white wedding dress, and your FI insisted on it<strong>...but then "compromised" by saying you could wear an A-line dress instead of a ball gown?</strong> Look, I see where you're coming from. I do. But here's the thing. It's his wedding too. He's uncomfortable dressed up. It's not him. You KNEW THIS. If I were you, I'd be talking to him about what he WOULD be comfortable with,a nd planning a wedding to match that formality. Along the same line, however, he should be wiling to compromise if you are.
Posted by J&K10910[/QUOTE]

See, but that's different than "I'd like to to wear a dress. Any dress. Just something that looks nice." That's what it sounds like she's saying.

RamonaFlowers · December 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_venting-fi?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:0b8c084e-59d3-49d6-89df-094a35fad14bPost:2ee96f47-bd1d-48e8-a396-1ee733b58030">Re: Venting about FI</a>:
[QUOTE]My ex-boyfriend was a lot like this. Emphasis on the ex -boyfriend part.
Posted by AllAboutTheBenjamin[/QUOTE]

Ditto.

The wedding is one thing, because I think both of you should wear whatever you want to that makes you each feel your best ... but the fact that he pretty much throws a tantrum over having to put on a suit once or twice a year, really? Come on. Marriage is for grown-ups, grown-ups don't throw hissy fits over having to wear a tie every once in a while.

I don't really have any advice for you, OP, sorry, because I just wouldn't be with somebody who acted so immaturely about something so innocuous. Frankly, I don't have the patience to put up with sh!t like that.

achiduck · December 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_venting-fi?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:0b8c084e-59d3-49d6-89df-094a35fad14bPost:754e91a7-efa7-45de-96ee-d96f907644e6">Re: Venting about FI</a>:
[QUOTE]Honestly, it's a sign of respect towards you to dress appropriately for a work function. If he's not, than frankly I'd take it as disrespect. And I'd nip the shopping with mommy thing in the butt.
Posted by dumdumfroggie[/QUOTE]

Ditto this.

As for the wedding, it's his wedding to and he should be able to be comfortable the day of. I went to a wedding recently where the groom was a "country boy" as well and they wore jeans and a tux jacket and white button up shirt. The bride wore what she wanted and the BMs were in knee length dresses. it looked fine and everyone "got it" since they know the couple.

redheadfsu · December 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_venting-fi?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:0b8c084e-59d3-49d6-89df-094a35fad14bPost:e1dd1778-bf0c-4d85-bc2a-d4f911d4cb87">Re: Venting about FI</a>:
[QUOTE] I took on every single one of his hobbies for our relationship, and although I love our relationship, he doesn't seem to meet me 50/50 at all times.<strong>
</strong>Posted by santana9505[/QUOTE]

RED FLAGS.

Why are you doing all of his hobbies? You can be separate people you know?

The clothes, sounds like he is acting like a child.

santana9505 · December 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_venting-fi?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:0b8c084e-59d3-49d6-89df-094a35fad14bPost:66576692-dc52-424b-9bee-fe64daabaca8">Re: Venting about FI</a>:
[QUOTE]Sometimes we do things in life that we don't want to do or aren't comfortable doing, in this instance it is "dressing up" or as I like to call it ... dressing APPROPRIATELY for the event to which you are to attend. This is a part of being a grown up. If mommy still has to dress him because he throws a tantrum every time... I'd be concerned. FI isn't huge on dressing up but when the occasion calls for it, he dutifully answers. <strong>Did something happen to your FI that has caused him to be this way?</strong> Maybe ask mommy dearest how she bribes him to dress appropriately so this wont be an ordeal everytime. ETA: I wrote the whole doing things we don't want to do before I saw yours Edie! :) Great minds think alike.
Posted by lbarr088[/QUOTE]

Hmm... I honestly cannot think of anything for him to be this way. It's just who he is, I suppose. And I can 100% truely say I love who he is, and I wouldn't change a thing about him.

I love him for him, but IMO, a few hours of looking semi-formal isn't killing him. I don't know how to approach our convorsations about it without him shutting me off and changing the subject....

NuggetBrain · December 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_venting-fi?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:0b8c084e-59d3-49d6-89df-094a35fad14bPost:e3d72a0a-f0fd-4c67-89be-1552b3eaa9cb">Re: Venting about FI</a>:
[QUOTE]IMO, he should be able to suck it up for a few hours a year to accompany you to your holiday party in appropriate attire. However, you knew his style when you met so <strong>I don't see why it's a BFD now that he doesn't like formal attire.
</strong>Posted by ILoveMilkDuds[/QUOTE]

If he's going to insist on coming to a black tie event, then he needs to dress accordingly. That's the BFD. It's not like she's trying to make him go and he doesn't want to.

J&K10910 · December 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_venting-fi?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:0b8c084e-59d3-49d6-89df-094a35fad14bPost:5bd95fde-5ab5-419f-8f69-9c7b77532735">Re: Venting about FI</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Venting about FI : I agree with everything you're saying, here. And my problem is that I know I compromise so much in our relationship. This is honestly all I really ever ask him for. Well...pretty much beg him for.
Posted by santana9505[/QUOTE]

Ok, but you compromising one issue and him compromising on this are two different things that should not be compared.

You KNEW he hated dressing up. For at least a year, you've known this. This should not be surprising to you.

I'm going to guess that you guys have different expectations as to what "compromising" means. I'm guessing he doesn't consider the things that you do to be compromising on your part, for whatever reason.

In any case, no matter WHO is being unreasonable here, it sounds like you guys are having a communication failure. I think that's the major issue.

annakb8 · December 2011

I'd like to ditto everything J&K has said.

And I think it's weird you took up all his hobbies.

MattsPenguin · December 2011

One thing that I sort of knew, but was really driven home to me during our pre-martial counseling, was how much my husband HATES parties. Well, he's just shy and sometimes would rather not go. I was so pissed at him a few years ago, when he didn't want to go to a Halloween party, because he hates dressing up (different kind of dressing up, but similar emotion). Then we talked about it more, and I realized that he just wasn't comfortable.

Now I ask him if he wants to go to stuff, and if he says no, I don't get mad. I go by myself and have a blast. I'm the extrovert, and he's the introvert. That's how we work.

Would you rather him come to the party in his choice of clothing or not go at all. It sounds like those are the two options. You can encourage him and ask him to dress a certain way, but if he says no, I'd say to back off.

AllAboutTheBenjamin · December 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_venting-fi?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:0b8c084e-59d3-49d6-89df-094a35fad14bPost:e1dd1778-bf0c-4d85-bc2a-d4f911d4cb87">Re: Venting about FI</a>:
[QUOTE]I would never "ex" him over this...I love every aspect of him, this is just a, umm....road block? Although the whole compromise of marriage thing comes in, and that just brings up other arguments.. So I guess I'm seeking ways to deal with this whole thing. For example, I took on every single one of his hobbies for our relationship, and although I love our relationship, he doesn't seem to meet me 50/50 at all times.
Posted by santana9505[/QUOTE]

I'm not saying you should dump him because he doesn't like to dress up. It just reminds me of my old boyfriend - in that getting him to do things was like pulling teeth from a tiger or trying to get a little kid to take medicine. He was terrible. I'd want him to come to a work party with me and he'd complain the entire time. I'd want him to come to a family dinner at my parent's and he'd sulk on the couch the whole evening. The one time he did oblige me was when for work, we had a "celebrity" theme for our Christmas party. We were supposed to dress up as our favorite celebrity. I dressed up as Marilyn Monroe and he bought a Fred Flintstone costume. FFS.

I would go to all his band performances and school functions with him, regardless of how I felt about it and I'd put on a smile the whole time and be social. He never wanted to offer me the same courtesy. It was like I was dating a selfish brat.

You guys really should be able to meet half-way on things, or compromise once in a while. I truly can't imagine dealing with that all the time. I'd go nuts.

santana9505 · December 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_venting-fi?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:0b8c084e-59d3-49d6-89df-094a35fad14bPost:5b9e4b7b-97c7-498a-99e5-b305a4ec66da">Re: Venting about FI</a>:
[QUOTE]Do you like his hobbies?
Posted by edielaura[/QUOTE]

Absolutely love his hobbies. I wouldn't have kept up with the hunting, fishing, boating, snowmobiling, etc. if I didn't love it. For 6 years this is pretty much all our life consists of. But I'm totally happy with that! We get along really well with these things in our life!

dumdumfroggie · December 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_venting-fi?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:0b8c084e-59d3-49d6-89df-094a35fad14bPost:2f349cbe-3234-4163-a0e5-88bec2616319">Re: Venting about FI</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Venting about FI : Yeah, the whole trying to put on jeans and shirt when he knew the formality is pretty passive aggressive, I agree with that. If he didn't want to dress up, he just should have said he didn't want to go. But the main point is the wedding attire, and I stand by what I said for that. Compromise happens on BOTH sides.
Posted by J&K10910[/QUOTE]

<div>Oh, true. I agree with that. There are lots of different outfits that can be used for the wedding to compromise. I was mainly focusing on the last part.</div><div>
</div><div>It sounds weird to use the term outfit for a guy...oh well.</div>

MattsPenguin · December 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_venting-fi?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:0b8c084e-59d3-49d6-89df-094a35fad14bPost:38cd1b70-4fb5-43f4-8b12-6fb1ede7963b">Re: Venting about FI</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Venting about FI : <strong>RED FLAGS</strong>. Why are you doing all of his hobbies? You can be separate people you know? The clothes, sounds like he is acting like a child.
Posted by redheadfsu[/QUOTE]

Ditto.

Anysunrise · December 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_venting-fi?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:0b8c084e-59d3-49d6-89df-094a35fad14bPost:824d8597-9777-4f8b-853d-7642a5e67350">Re: Venting about FI</a>:
[QUOTE]I think there's a middle ground between "old black jeans and a camo shirt" and "a tux with tails and tophat" here. If he doesn't like to dress up, fine. But at least throw on some khakis and a polo shirt or a button down. That's not super dressed up. The fact that he won't even do that tells me he has more concern for his own comfort for a few hours than you. And that's bullsh*t.
Posted by NuggetBrain[/QUOTE]

<div>I agree. </div>

J&K10910 · December 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_venting-fi?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:0b8c084e-59d3-49d6-89df-094a35fad14bPost:d3efb7bf-5ace-4a15-becf-8d64b23c7d31">Re: Venting about FI</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Venting about FI : See, but that's different than "I'd like to to wear a dress. Any dress. Just something that looks nice." That's what it sounds like she's saying.
Posted by NuggetBrain[/QUOTE]

That's not at all what I got out of it. He didn't want to dress up (I'm focusing on the wedding here, FYI). She said "let's compromise, you only have to wear the tux for the ceremony and pictures." Then what? Then he can take the jacket off? Everyone does that. That's not a compromise, in my opinion. If she was saying "Ok, How about nice dress pants, a shirt, and a tie, and he was still like FUUCK THAT, THEN I'd agree that he's being unreasonable.

As far as I can tell, she hasn't said that she's so much as asked him what he'd be comfortable in. Or that they discussed this before determining the formality of the wedding.

jemmini6 · December 2011

Yeah...he would have been turned away from my H's company holiday party. They received an email at least once a week for 6 weeks before the event, plus it was in bold on the 'ticket' itself that jeans were expressly forbidden and they would be striclty enforcing dress code standards at the door.

If he knew what the dress code was, had nice clothes, and still put jeans on, I'd be pretty upset too. It's one thing for him to want to dress down for your wedding because that's an event where you set the dress code, but at a company function that has standards set...that's just disrespectful to you and you need to have a talk to him about it before you get married.

AllAboutTheBenjamin · December 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_venting-fi?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:0b8c084e-59d3-49d6-89df-094a35fad14bPost:e8548f3e-8b7d-47de-a96f-42352ac70780">Re: Venting about FI</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Venting about FI : If he's going to insist on coming to a black tie event, then he needs to dress accordingly. That's the BFD. It's not like she's trying to make him go and he doesn't want to.
Posted by NuggetBrain[/QUOTE]

Agreed. If you show up underdressed to fancy events like that, sorry, but you look like a douche.

I'm not saying he should learn to love dressing to the nines every day, but he should be able to dress appropriately for certain events and not act like a baby about it.

J&K10910 · December 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_venting-fi?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:0b8c084e-59d3-49d6-89df-094a35fad14bPost:e8548f3e-8b7d-47de-a96f-42352ac70780">Re: Venting about FI</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Venting about FI : If he's going to insist on coming to a black tie event, then he needs to dress accordingly. That's the BFD. It's not like she's trying to make him go and he doesn't want to.
Posted by NuggetBrain[/QUOTE]

This I agree with. And he didn't dress accordingly, so he didn't go. Now if he was whining about how he had to stay home, I'd say "Dude, what's your deal?"

But I still think there's the bigger issue surrounding the wedding and lack of communication and compromise over the formality and attire for that.

redheadfsu · December 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_venting-fi?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:0b8c084e-59d3-49d6-89df-094a35fad14bPost:9927424b-150b-4b3a-8395-e8d02591678d">Re: Venting about FI</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Venting about FI : Hmm... I honestly cannot think of anything for him to be this way. It's just who he is, I suppose. And I can 100% truely say I love who he is, and I wouldn't change a thing about him. I love him for him, but IMO, a few hours of looking semi-formal isn't killing him. <strong>I don't know how to approach our convorsations about it without him shutting me off and changing the subject....
</strong>Posted by santana9505[/QUOTE]

He won't even talk to you about it?

My husband hates to dress up, but if and when I have functions and he wants to tag along with me he dresses up. Yes, he might jokingly whine about it while getting dressed, but nothing really serious or annoying. This is about loving your partner and understanding that in life you sometimes have to do something you might not love, but understanding it will make them happy. (not talking about wedding- just attending a formal affair thing).

J&K10910 · December 2011

If he won't even DISCUSS it with you, you guys have waaaay bigger things to deal with than what he's wearing to your wedding.

Venting about FI

Re: Venting about FI

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