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Not Engaged Yet
calindi
member
Would you upgrade?
We were buying the engagement ring this weekend, and the jeweler kept suggesting the Tacori ring over the one I liked that was similar (and much cheaper) because of the lifetime guarantee, adding that the ring could be upgraded later for free. I told him that I wasn't going to upgrade my ring or my diamond, and he seemed shocked and kept trying to convince me that it was a selling point because "everyone eventually wants to upgrade at some point, or you can get an anniversary band you can wear instead."
I was shocked and somewhat offended - if I say I'm not going to upgrade, dude, then STFU and just sell us the ring I want or we'll buy it some place else!
Anyway, was curious what you all thought of that - would you want to upgrade your ring ever? Would you wear an anniversary band instead someday?
I was shocked and somewhat offended - if I say I'm not going to upgrade, dude, then STFU and just sell us the ring I want or we'll buy it some place else!
Anyway, was curious what you all thought of that - would you want to upgrade your ring ever? Would you wear an anniversary band instead someday?
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Re: Would you upgrade?
This is something I personally don't understand. I don't care enough to try and make a fuss with someone over it, or really say anything at all, but I don't understand the logic. I CAN understand wanting a different ring or a nicer one, but I don't see how you can upgrade your engagement ring...after the engagement. So I wouldn't do it.
I do understand the idea of an anniversary band. This view is likely a bit strange, but I don't feel that I have "earned" or "deserve" the ring I currently have. Yes, I understand that it is a gift from my FI to me. I'd be just as satisfied with a plain wedding band. However, when 10, 20, etc. anniversaries come, I think those should be more celebrated.
Does that even make sense to anyone else?
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To me, the ring I receive when BF proposes will be the ring that holds all the meaning. It was the ring he picked out and the one that reminds me of "us". I can't understand wanting to replace that with something "better". If you want more diamonds later in life, add a band or get something else that carries meaning to you...don't change your e-ring.
Just my opinion though...
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[QUOTE]Calindi, pretty exciting that you are buying it this weekend!!! :)
Posted by NurseyK[/QUOTE]
It was fun! We ran into some friends in the jewelry store who are getting married next month and were picking up their wedding bands, so she goes, "Oh! I get to shop with someone else's money! Cate, try this one on!" We all had a lot of laughs and a lot of fun, but I kept comparing everything to the ring I fell for last summer (even my guy was doing it, too!). Like, "Oh, this is nice, it's kind of like that ring" or "This isn't quite as low as that ring, but it's pretty."
So finally the jeweler asked about "that ring" I was referring to, and we told him it was discontinued and sold out last we were in. And my friend said to the jeweler (who is a family friend of hers), "They can find or make anything here, can't you?" And he smiles, and goes and calls up the company who made the ring, and they located a ring and matching wedding band! So they're shipping them to the store, and my guy's going to go in and negotiate a price this week. He doesn't want me there for the negotiation, as my doe-eyes over the ring might weaken his ability to lower the price. Fair point! But hopefully we'll have the ring in a few weeks!!!
Anyway, my diamond is actually way bigger than I would have selected (even if money was no object), but it's a family heirloom and important to me and I'd NEVER trade it in. The band is exactly what I want, so I'm delighted. The whole "everyone wants to upgrade" just struck me as annoying, but perhaps he just wanted to sell the Tacori that day rather than waiting for the other ring to come in. Then again, we live in Miami, so maybe trading in rings is as common as trading in husbands seems to be!
I did tell him since the setting was so high, I'd probably just wear my wedding band if/when we have kids. He's ok with that. The band I will never take off.
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I have a heirloom diamond, and if someone else in my family wished to have the diamond, I would be fine with giving it up. Don't get me wrong, I wear my e-ring far more then I ever thought I would after the wedding, but I already know what ring I would get as my "upgrade" and it's not a bigger diamond.
BTW, the double band thing is great! That way if you get an anniversary band, you just toss it between the wedding bands.
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However, if you love the one you picked (which you obviously do), I don't think you should upgrade. You should especially not be pressured to upgrade. If you liked the Tacori ring a little more, I personally would probably go for that one as it's likely not much more than the one you're looking at and you have the guarantee. But, that's just my opinion, of course!
I've said this before, but I don't have the strong emotional connection to my ring that some girls have (funny, since I obsessed so much over making it perfect). I could replace it or change it without feeling weird at all, and my tastes change so frequently anyway that there's a good chance I'll wake up one morning and just not like it anymore. That's one reason we wanted to keep my ring pretty cheap.
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So exciting that you guys are getting your engagement ring and getting the one that you love!! Congrats!!
If, however, it got lost/stolen or something, I might pick out something completely different to replace it.
I also like the idea of getting something to wear with the current wedding set on like a 10th wedding anniversary.
Also, eeew pushy sales people.
BF and I have talked rings and I would never upgrade my future engagement ring, because we will have matching wedding bands and the engagement ring will become on and off a right hand ring.
Congrats, by the way! It sounds like you had an exciting weekend.