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May need to kick out a bridesmaid...

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Re: May need to kick out a bridesmaid...

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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_may-need-kick-out-bridesmaid?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:24f64672-8d8b-42ea-ab80-b3773348df26Post:d916fd26-cc01-406e-9eb2-77935a3d5376">Re: May need to kick out a bridesmaid...</a>:
    [QUOTE]I noticed it only took babling brook 4 minutes to respond after I posted, almost as if you have nothing better to do...don't you guys have anything better to do then sit around and wait for the next comment to make? Seeing as you all have 1000's of posts under your belts, my guess is no.  I also enjoy the fact that you're on here so much you've picked up supposed trends in peoples' reponses. Hey wait...don't some of you have weddings to plan for? Here's a little tip, if you're going to spend so much time on here, maybe when you read people's inquiries, you should actually read and understand the words, not just make assumptions on what you briefly scanned through. Anyway I do have a wedding to plan for, and thought I'd find some constructive criticism here, which I did from a couple of people. The rest of you might want to use your time a little more wisely...say, like spending time with your FI or husband instead of endless hours trying to build yourself up on an online forum. Oh, also if you do post after this, just know that I won't be giving you the satisfaction of actually reading it, so by all means waste your time.
    Posted by morningglow[/QUOTE]

    I think I just went back in time by ten years, am I in 6th grade?
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    I think we hit a record today girls of being called bitter old hags in one way or another.
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_may-need-kick-out-bridesmaid?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:24f64672-8d8b-42ea-ab80-b3773348df26Post:04513d36-9d13-4067-ba1b-36490cbc7426">Re: May need to kick out a bridesmaid...</a>:
    [QUOTE]I think we hit a record today girls of being called bitter old hags in one way or another.
    Posted by tldh[/QUOTE]

    I'M NOT OLD!! I'm only 21!!!!!
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    Eh, I'm getting married in July and we're not looking to order until January.  SarahSue, I think you're probably being upsold by your salon.
    Planning Our Wedding - Updated 04/11/11
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_may-need-kick-out-bridesmaid?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:24f64672-8d8b-42ea-ab80-b3773348df26Post:eb50aa2e-d37b-4ed2-b860-a5e94c738334">Re: May need to kick out a bridesmaid...</a>:
    [QUOTE]I understand the dresses having to be ordered by Decmeber. My wedding is in July and Im in the same boat and didnt have a choice with many bridal salons here with the same dress me and my BM picked out. Unfortuanley they have to be ordered by Dec 30th paid in full. My BM didnt have a problem with this due to them knowing for months now when they needed to be ordered. Most of them had theres taken care of right away. The salons do this due to some colors or styles go "out of season" and are not available again until its too late to order and get them by your wedding date. I do know this because this happened to a grilfiend of mine and she had to change everything she had already picked out.
    Posted by Sarahsue1684[/QUOTE]
    That's an excellent reason why no one should even start looking for BM dresses that early; you can't get locked into something out-of-season if you're not shopping then.  Honestly, if the dress I wanted required me to order that far in advance, I'd keep looking.
    This is a neglected planning bio.
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    Sometimes I feel like people think that brides are delicate little flower princesses who get all dressed up and pretty for one special moment of their dreams, when really they're just normal people who just happen to be getting married. Things shouldn't have to be sugar-coated for grown-ass women. -mstar284
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_may-need-kick-out-bridesmaid?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:24f64672-8d8b-42ea-ab80-b3773348df26Post:eb50aa2e-d37b-4ed2-b860-a5e94c738334">Re: May need to kick out a bridesmaid...</a>:
    [QUOTE]I understand the dresses having to be ordered by Decmeber. My wedding is in July and Im in the same boat and didnt have a choice with many bridal salons here with the same dress me and my BM picked out. Unfortuanley they have to be ordered by Dec 30th paid in full. My BM didnt have a problem with this due to them knowing for months now when they needed to be ordered. Most of them had theres taken care of right away. The salons do this due to some colors or styles go "out of season" and are not available again until its too late to order and get them by your wedding date. I do know this because this happened to a grilfiend of mine and she had to change everything she had already picked out.
    Posted by Sarahsue1684[/QUOTE]

    You've been had.
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_may-need-kick-out-bridesmaid?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:24f64672-8d8b-42ea-ab80-b3773348df26Post:eb50aa2e-d37b-4ed2-b860-a5e94c738334">Re: May need to kick out a bridesmaid...</a>:
    [QUOTE]I understand the dresses having to be ordered by Decmeber. My wedding is in July and Im in the same boat and didnt have a choice with many bridal salons here with the same dress me and my BM picked out. Unfortuanley they have to be ordered by Dec 30th paid in full. My BM didnt have a problem with this due to them knowing for months now when they needed to be ordered. Most of them had theres taken care of right away. The salons do this due to some colors or styles go "out of season" and are not available again until its too late to order and get them by your wedding date. I do know this because this happened to a grilfiend of mine and she had to change everything she had already picked out.
    Posted by Sarahsue1684[/QUOTE]
    What a coincidence, that happens to be their deadline for end-of-year sales for their commissions.  Sweetie, they lie.  They want you to buy before 2011 so they can get your commission.  Their motives are not remotely altruistic.  Would you buy a car because the salesman said you HAD to pay by Dec. 31?  This is no different.
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    "I think bablingbrooke is the 13 yr old marring her cousin at the town hall. Lets all give her a big hand. And hope her inbred children can live normal lives." -tabs.

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    bablingbrookebablingbrooke member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2010
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_may-need-kick-out-bridesmaid?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:24f64672-8d8b-42ea-ab80-b3773348df26Post:cff6d917-ab4d-46cf-acab-4d5995d8d88f">Re: May need to kick out a bridesmaid...</a>:
    [QUOTE]At least I know my dresses will be in early and that lets everyone take there time to get fitted and settled so they are not doing it last minute and having to worry about it! I also had a friend who waited and they screwed up on her order she ended up having to buy her dresses from a department store because all the bridal salons take months to get dresses in. This is totally different from buying a car why would you even compare it to that. You dont order fricken cars....hello!?!?! And yes they do discontinue dresses therefore if you want that dress you need to order or you wont get it..
    Posted by Sarahsue1684[/QUOTE]
    I would respond to this line by line, but I'm giggling too much.
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    "I think bablingbrooke is the 13 yr old marring her cousin at the town hall. Lets all give her a big hand. And hope her inbred children can live normal lives." -tabs.

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    My girls intentionally went to department stores for their dresses.  The horror.
    This is a neglected planning bio.
    This is a belated married bio, with no reviews yet because I'm lazy.

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    Sometimes I feel like people think that brides are delicate little flower princesses who get all dressed up and pretty for one special moment of their dreams, when really they're just normal people who just happen to be getting married. Things shouldn't have to be sugar-coated for grown-ass women. -mstar284
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    Allow me Brooke.  The voice that came to mind reading this hands on hips post was that of my cousin (you know the one).

    At least I know my dresses will be in early and that lets everyone take there time to get fitted and settled so they are not doing it last minute and having to worry about it!
    They are not children.  A good seamstress can get your dress back to you in less than a day.  This isn't something you need to worry about.

    I also had a friend who waited and they screwed up on her order she ended up having to buy her dresses from a department store because all the bridal salons take months to get dresses in.
    If they screwed it up it was on them to rectify the situation and get a rush order in with time to spare.  Yell breach of contract and watch them scramble/

    This is totally different from buying a car why would you even compare it to that. You dont order fricken cars....hello!?!?!
    Really??  DH's car wasn't in the lot when he bought it and it had to be ordered. Like car salesmen, bridal salon saleswomen work on commissions and have quotas to meet.  If they don't make their monthly or end of year quota, they are out of a job.  If you unquestioningly believe what any salesperson tells you, then you are very naive.

    And yes they do discontinue dresses therefore if you want that dress you need to order or you wont get it..
    Don't shop so far ahead of time and this won't be a concern.
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    And the real story comes out...  so you're making your girls spend a lot of money at the most expensive time of year so that you don't have to worry.

    And clearly analogies are lost on you.

    Brooke - I hope you calm down enough to respond line by line because I'd like to read that. :)
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    Nah, Tricia covered pretty much everything I would have said.  It's also hard to type with one hand when I'm clutching my pearls at the idea of having to go to a department store for anything wedding-related.  Oh, wait, my MIL bought her outfit at Macy's and my mom bought hers at Ross...<faints>
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    I didn't see Tricia's response until after I posted. :)
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    megk8ozmegk8oz member
    First Comment
    edited December 2010

    Um, I've totally ordered a car before. I'm not being sarcastic, I actually have done this. The dealership didn't have the color I wanted, but the car totally came in that color. I wasn't going to pay a ton of money for a car in a color I didn't want just so the salesman could get his commission. If he wanted my money, he had to be willing to work with me, not the other way around.

    And yes, sales people lie all the freakin' time. Their salaries are mainly based on sales numbers and commissions, so if they have a shot of bringing in a 6 person bridal party, they are going to tell a bride pretty much anything to get her to order those 6 dresses with that sales person ASAP, so there isn't a risk of the bride going off and finding a dress at another store, or coming back after a few weeks of thinking it over and giving the sale to somebody else.

    Yes, dresses do get discontinued ... but honestly there isn't a dress on the planet that once it goes out of style "omg-there's-absolutely-no-other-dress-in-existence-that-even-looks-remotely-close-to-it!". So the "d word" is hardly an excuse to make everybody buy a dress almost a year before the wedding. If you go shopping 3-4 months before (A way more reasonable window of time), with even the smallest of efforts, one could find a dress that looks similar to anything that was discontinued 6 months prior.


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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_may-need-kick-out-bridesmaid?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:24f64672-8d8b-42ea-ab80-b3773348df26Post:0f62431e-e054-419b-b32b-4f31fd5b6d29">Re: May need to kick out a bridesmaid...</a>:
    [QUOTE]Im glad I picked reasonable priced dresses therefore it wasnt a big deal to any of my BM. And truly money during this time for us is not an issue do to having small almost no family to buy for.  I dont see why you stupid girls all think its such a big deal to get the dresses ordered and out of the way. All my BM requested this and I was on board and agreed listening to what they had to say. I would not be to happy if I had waited and something gone wrong. Regarding this issue.... From tldh I also had a friend who waited and they screwed up on her order she ended up having to buy her dresses from a department store because all the bridal salons take months to get dresses in. If they screwed it up it was on them to rectify the situation and get a rush order in with time to spare.  Yell breach of contract and watch them scramble/ I wouldnt want to wait for them to have to scramble and possibly come up with nothing and then deal with all the other last minute details for my wedding or make anyone else involved in my wedding have to scramble. You people are nuts!!!
    Posted by Sarahsue1684[/QUOTE]
    If they want to buy the dresses now, that's fine, but based on your previous posts it really just sounds like retcon.

    And based on this post, you sound like a real peach.
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    bablingbrookebablingbrooke member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2010
    DH was a car salesman the summer between his undergrad and MBA program (trust me, he gets shiit from me for this and I didn't even know him then).  He said he never once sold a car or made commission because he would have had to lie through his teeth, and decided he would never work in sales again after that.  ETA: However it does mean that he's the best person to go car shopping with because he will shoot down salesmen's BS so quickly they literally start to sweat.
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    "I think bablingbrooke is the 13 yr old marring her cousin at the town hall. Lets all give her a big hand. And hope her inbred children can live normal lives." -tabs.

    A word of warning from your friends at Cracked.com: Remember that text is going to be how you make your first impression over the internet; if every third word you type is misspelled, people will automatically assume that you're a moron.
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_may-need-kick-out-bridesmaid?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:24f64672-8d8b-42ea-ab80-b3773348df26Post:a9ccf6f7-7293-448e-acb1-f3b66276e83a">Re: May need to kick out a bridesmaid...</a>:
    [QUOTE]@Tricia: Yeah my mom originally bought a black dress at Macy's then found one she liked better at Ross that was in the exact color as the BM dresses so she opted to wear that one instead (good show, I mean obvi if someone wears black they disapprove of the wedding, right?).  <strong>No wonder I turned out so nuts.
    </strong>Posted by bablingbrooke[/QUOTE]

    Honey, there's a reason why you got into law school.  Being nuts is something of a job requirement.  I think it says something about the posts on this board that so many attorneys have made it their homeboard.  I guess we see the need to bring logic and rational thinking here.
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    New WP board motto: You don't have to be crazy to post here, but it helps!
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    "I think bablingbrooke is the 13 yr old marring her cousin at the town hall. Lets all give her a big hand. And hope her inbred children can live normal lives." -tabs.

    A word of warning from your friends at Cracked.com: Remember that text is going to be how you make your first impression over the internet; if every third word you type is misspelled, people will automatically assume that you're a moron.
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_may-need-kick-out-bridesmaid?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:24f64672-8d8b-42ea-ab80-b3773348df26Post:1a44db24-25d9-4473-ad18-183feab2891f">Re: May need to kick out a bridesmaid...</a>:
    [QUOTE]New WP board motto: You don't have to be crazy to post here, but it helps!
    Posted by bablingbrooke[/QUOTE]

    I like!!!

    You should add this in your siggy!!!
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_may-need-kick-out-bridesmaid?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:24f64672-8d8b-42ea-ab80-b3773348df26Post:102448d9-53c2-40de-ab3f-066556c777b0">Re: May need to kick out a bridesmaid...</a>:
    [QUOTE]DH was a car salesman the summer between his undergrad and MBA program (trust me, he gets shiit from me for this and I didn't even know him then).  He said he never once sold a car or made commission because he would have had to lie through his teeth, and decided he would never work in sales again after that.  ETA: <strong>However it does mean that he's the best person to go car shopping with because he will shoot down salesmen's BS so quickly they literally start to sweat.
    </strong>Posted by bablingbrooke[/QUOTE]

    Woman I met years ago shops for cars as follows:

    Tells the salesperson that she is going to six dealerships to look at one make and model of car.  She is not going to haggle.  They are to give her their best price on said car.  At the end of the day, she will give her business to the dealership that gave her the best price.
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_may-need-kick-out-bridesmaid?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:24f64672-8d8b-42ea-ab80-b3773348df26Post:fa2b6ecf-90f7-444c-b68f-205377bf1c64">Re: May need to kick out a bridesmaid...</a>:
    [QUOTE]Oh trust me honey im the most easy going peach there is. Me and my friends included must be doing it wrong here in MN than because all the weddings I have been in and all my dozen friends that have been married in the last 2 years have done it this way....I even asked before I started searching and this is what was suggested. Maybe things are different in your neck of the woods then ours....everyone does things diffrently it shouldnt be such a big deal.
    Posted by Sarahsue1684[/QUOTE]
    Managed to include "I'm the most easygoing person in the world who micromanages others" with "everyone does it" with "it's a regional thing" with "you don't know me."  Rarely have I seen all four standard answers combined into one post on the boards.<div>
    </div><div>And honey, no easygoing peach makes their friends buy BM dresses 7 1/2 months out so that the bride does't freak out (which was your original claim for why you insisted on this).  Sorry.  An easygoing peach lets them buy at their own pace and trusts their friends to have things ready by the wedding.  </div>
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    @ Tricia: Does it work?
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    "I think bablingbrooke is the 13 yr old marring her cousin at the town hall. Lets all give her a big hand. And hope her inbred children can live normal lives." -tabs.

    A word of warning from your friends at Cracked.com: Remember that text is going to be how you make your first impression over the internet; if every third word you type is misspelled, people will automatically assume that you're a moron.
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    megk8ozmegk8oz member
    First Comment
    edited December 2010
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_may-need-kick-out-bridesmaid?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:24f64672-8d8b-42ea-ab80-b3773348df26Post:471e010f-e807-45bd-b4ca-1e9942fa26ad">Re: May need to kick out a bridesmaid...</a>:
    [QUOTE]And honey, no easygoing peach makes their friends buy BM dresses 7 1/2 months out so that the bride does't freak out (which was your original claim for why you insisted on this).  Sorry.  An easygoing peach lets them buy at their own pace and trusts their friends to have things ready by the wedding.  
    Posted by bablingbrooke[/QUOTE]

    The truth. You speak it.

    Even my [ex] friend who was a complete psychopath of a bride (Which is now why she's an "ex" friend) waited until May to order dresses for her August wedding. The dresses arrived with more than enough time to be altered.

    Granted, she was still a complete nightmare about ordering the dresses, but at least nobody had to worry about trying to tell her they were going to be 6 months pregnant at the wedding and would no longer be able to fit into the ordered dress anymore.

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    Yep.  Salespeople don't like it and will still try to make you wait while they "discuss" it with their manager but she's always been able to get great deals.  If they start to object or start any conversation with her, she cuts them off and repeats her rules.  If they want her business, they'll listen.  If they don't, she'll find another salesperson.

    Unfortunately, I found out this little trick of hers after I bought my car.  Still got a good deal on it though.
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    AKA GoodLuckBear14
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    People who claim to be easygoing oh so rarely are.  That's right up there on the believability scale with "I'm not a racist, but..."  You ain't foolin' no one, sugar.

    An easygoing bride lets her girls order their dresses on their own schedule and doesn't worry about the complications, because if something gets screwed up, oh well, we'll figure it out then.  A REALLY easygoing bride actually gives the girls a few basic guidelines and leaves the entire shopping process up to them.  By two months before the wedding, most of my girls hadn't even selected their dresses yet, let alone ordered them.  They all showed up with perfectly suitable, well-fitting dresses, and whaddaya know, I had none of the drama that brides like OP have.
    This is a neglected planning bio.
    This is a belated married bio, with no reviews yet because I'm lazy.

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    Sometimes I feel like people think that brides are delicate little flower princesses who get all dressed up and pretty for one special moment of their dreams, when really they're just normal people who just happen to be getting married. Things shouldn't have to be sugar-coated for grown-ass women. -mstar284
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    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_may-need-kick-out-bridesmaid?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:37Discussion:24f64672-8d8b-42ea-ab80-b3773348df26Post:0fc73cba-f81c-42f8-bf30-cce4e213289b">Re: May need to kick out a bridesmaid...</a>:
    [QUOTE]People who claim to be easygoing oh so rarely are.  That's right up there on the believability scale with "I'm not a racist, but..."  You ain't foolin' no one, sugar. Posted by aerinpegadrak[/QUOTE]

    But Aerin, I really am mature for my age. I am, I am, I am, believe me dammit! ~pouts~

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    *rolls eyes*

    Sarahsue, you're probaby the most naive person I've ever seen on these boards. If you honestly think the sales people aren't lying to you, then you're going to get screwed over and over again in life and don't say we didn't tell you so. Goodness gracious.

    And I think Christmas/holidays are expensive everywhere. Even in Minnesota.

    YOUR piece of mind has NOTHING to do with your BMs WALLETS. Nothing. Nada. If you're going to have a heart attack for the next couple months if they don't order dresses for your JULY WEDDING then you need to take a Valium and calm down. If you're BMs ordered their dresses already, good for them I guess, but I'm willing to bet at least ONE isn't going to fit (too small or too big) in one way or another because you ordered a dress nearly a YEAR before you needed it. Have you ever fit perfectly into clothes after many, many months afer buying it? I sure don't. Maybe that's just because I'm fat.

    There are many, MANY reasons to wait to order/buy dresses off the rack (OMGGG!!!) and your piece of mind and a salesperson's constant nagging do not even begin to outweigh those reasons.

    Girl, please.
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    Hmm, she deleted all her posts...
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    "I think bablingbrooke is the 13 yr old marring her cousin at the town hall. Lets all give her a big hand. And hope her inbred children can live normal lives." -tabs.

    A word of warning from your friends at Cracked.com: Remember that text is going to be how you make your first impression over the internet; if every third word you type is misspelled, people will automatically assume that you're a moron.
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    I hope that was because she realized she was being ridiculous.
    Planning Our Wedding - Updated 04/11/11
    imageWedding Countdown Ticker
    "If you can't think of something nice to say, don't say something nice" - Stephen Colbert
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    aerinpegadrakaerinpegadrak member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2010
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_wedding-party_may-need-kick-out-bridesmaid?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:37Discussion:24f64672-8d8b-42ea-ab80-b3773348df26Post:ba387d7d-fbf1-4175-ba9a-e15c72dc2484">Re: May need to kick out a bridesmaid...</a>:
    [QUOTE]*rolls eyes* Sarahsue, you're probaby the most naive person I've ever seen on these boards. If you honestly think the sales people aren't lying to you, then you're going to get screwed over and over again in life and don't say we didn't tell you so. Goodness gracious. And I think Christmas/holidays are expensive everywhere. Even in Minnesota. YOUR piece of mind has NOTHING to do with your BMs WALLETS. Nothing. Nada. If you're going to have a heart attack for the next couple months if they don't order dresses for your JULY WEDDING then you need to take a Valium and calm down. If you're BMs ordered their dresses already, good for them I guess, but I'm willing to bet at least ONE isn't going to fit (too small or too big) in one way or another because you ordered a dress nearly a YEAR before you needed it. Have you ever fit perfectly into clothes after many, many months afer buying it? I sure don't. Maybe that's just because I'm fat. There are many, MANY reasons to wait to order/buy dresses off the rack (OMGGG!!!) and your piece of mind and a salesperson's constant nagging do not even begin to outweigh those reasons. <strong>Girl, please.</strong>
    Posted by Manwaithiel[/QUOTE]
    <a rel="nofollow" href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e-i7rz9CsIM">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e-i7rz9CsIM</a>
    This is a neglected planning bio.
    This is a belated married bio, with no reviews yet because I'm lazy.

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    Sometimes I feel like people think that brides are delicate little flower princesses who get all dressed up and pretty for one special moment of their dreams, when really they're just normal people who just happen to be getting married. Things shouldn't have to be sugar-coated for grown-ass women. -mstar284
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