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Not Engaged Yet
Swazzle
member
Confessions
I confess that...
I will be staring at the clock all day waiting for it to be 4:30.
I really don't want to get season tickets for the Devils again next year but I know FI will be really upset about this.
It makes me sad that the board has been so quiet lately.
BloodandChocolate's siggy pic really, really disgusts me.
I ate like 1 bad meal a day this week except for yesterday & I'm pretty sure I gained all the weight I lost last week back because I apparently like to sabotage myself after doing well.
ETA:
I worked out only once this week. Yep, sabotage.
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Confessions
I confess that I really care about how our wedding reception location looks. I confess that I don't want it to be held in just another ugly ballroom that everyone will forget immediately after they leave the reception. I confess that we haven't booked a backup venue yet because of this.
Married!
[QUOTE]I confess that: I really like my roommate as a person, but I cannot sit in the same room with her while she eats or at some point, I will choke her to death.<strong> I finally made a decision as to what I'm doing with these next few weeks</strong>, and I'm terrified to tell my parents because they'll believe it's for the wrong reasons. And I really hate hearing the disappointment in my mother's voice. For the first time in my life this week, I let someone watch me cry hard. I don't hang out with the other interns very much because I feel self-conscious about money and how I look. (I'll come back to this...I have to go to work.)
Posted by peekaboo2011[/QUOTE]
<div>What did you decide you're going to do, Peek?</div>
[QUOTE]I went out to drinks with my friend's "boyfriend" to discuss her. He nor I have told her this. I strongly encouraged him to stop seeing her and he confessed that he only keeps seeing her for the sex. I outed all the lies she told him and I am kinda glad she got fired from where we work so now she can tell him she was never in line for supervisor.
Posted by meamolly[/QUOTE]
<div>I confess that you don't sound like a very good friend. Maybe I don't know the whole back story but you went for drinks with your friend's BF, are keeping it a secret from her, you got involved in their relationship, AND you're glad she got fired from her job? I hope none of my "friends" think doing shiit like that is ok. </div>
[QUOTE]I confess that I'm kind of jealous that FI just wrote a book and is selling it. It makes me feel like I haven't done shiit with my life. I confess that I really care about how our wedding reception location looks. <strong>I confess that I don't want it to be held in just another ugly ballroom that everyone will forget immediately after they leave the reception.</strong> I confess that we haven't booked a backup venue yet because of this.
Posted by mookow86[/QUOTE]
<div>Same here. NJ is well-known for its ugly ballrooms too. It was hard to find one that is different & suits us. I really, really hope it works out with the gallery, Moo. Have you gotten any sort of update from them lately?</div>
Married!
I confess that it really bothers me that FI has not finished our STDs and have to keep telling myself it really doesn't matter.
I confess that I giggle to myself each time I type 'STDs' even though that is dated.
I confess I like that my anxiety has probably helped me loose and keep off a lot of weight I used to carry around and I like it. I like being smaller.
I confess that I'm paranoid that lurkers know who I am IRL, but I don't want to lie or avoid truths on this board.
[QUOTE]<strong>I confess that I'm also sabotaging myself with food</strong>.
Posted by DanieKA[/QUOTE]
I confess that I self sabotage too. I do really well for like a week or two and then decide I can afford something, but then I end up eating like an entire bag of nachos or something.
I confess that I don't want to tell FMIL that we're moving until afterwards so that she won't have the opportunity to come "help" us move and basically rearrange the new place herself while we lift the heavy stuff.
I confess that money, or lack of, has been stressing me out hard core. I really hope that tracking everything I spend will help me learn some better spending habits.
I confess that I don't want to do any family birthday parties for a year because I feel like there is one every other weekend and between that and visiting FMIL, we never have a weekend to ourselves anymore.
I confess that I have just spent my entire break looking up eye candy for the other post and reading here instead of cleaning the kitchen, lol.
[QUOTE]I confess that I secretly hope DH plans something romantic for Valentine's Day. I don't think I'll be disappointed if he doesn't, but I wouldn't object to a nice dinner or flowers. I confess that I'm really starting to freak out with this conference. It seemed so far away for the longest time and now it's in a few weeks. Eek. I<strong> confess that I've had really bad lower back pain for a few weeks and I've been too scared to call a doctor. I confess that I love you all <3</strong>
Posted by laurenb09[/QUOTE]
I confess that I have been having a few bathroom issues again, but don't want to call the doctor because he doesn't give me good vibes and he seems test-happy and I don't have the money or the time to keep doing it. I also really don't want a scope. From a male doctor.
I also confess that you are an awesome lady! : )
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Confessions : I totally looked at some old posts last night, too. Very interesting!
Posted by polo1425[/QUOTE]
:D I learned that I never had to introduce myself. That someone from my month board was the same person I remembered from here. And that there were a whole lot of interesting threads back then!
[QUOTE]I confess that... It makes me sad that the board has been so quiet lately.
Posted by rdr716[/QUOTE]
Oh me too.
[QUOTE]I confess that I'm excited Mo has his ice fishing weekend this weekend and will be away. I love him dearly but enjoy a weekend to myself now and again for just "me time." When I see people on the board be like "I can't spend a night away from BF/FI/H, it's awful!"<strong> then I feel like a bad SO for feeling this way</strong>. I confess that I already told my parents I'd go see them, but that it is now supposed to snow and I'm not sure I want to drive north in the snow. They will understand, but it still makes me feel like a bad daughter. I confess that I feel guilty about a lot of things I really shouldn't feel guilty about (see above two confessions). I confess that I trimmed two of Earl's nails too close to the quick when he squirmed (he HATES getting his nails trimmed) and he bled a little and I cried because I hurt him. I confess that I have no idea what I want to do with my life and I'm a little jealous that Mo has a job that he loves and one that is so "right" for him.<strong> I need help finding that.</strong> I confess that I want to eat food that is terrible for me pretty much nonstop every day. Right now I just really want McDonalds hotcakes with sausage and that fake maple syrup. I have no idea why. I also confess that if I start eating badly I can't stop.<strong> I confess that I've had dreams every night for the past week that Mo has proposed and I get really frustrated when I wake up and it's not true.</strong> I'm getting antsy and I don't like feeling this way. I know it is time for another (real) timeline talk..
Posted by LivLeighton[/QUOTE]
<div>1-I confess that I am jealous of people that feel how you do. I confess I get jealous when FI does things on his own, especially if he goes off for a whole weekend. It's rooted in self-esteem issues, i.e. what if he has more fun without me than he has with me?</div><div>
</div><div>2-This. I need to make an appt. with a career counselor to talk about that.</div><div>
</div><div>3-That happened to me too, pre-engagement. Luckily all the e-rings he tried to give me in those dreams were U-G-L-Y, so I wasn't TOO disappointed :)</div><div>
</div><div>I confess that I should be leaving for work in 10 minutes and I haven't even gotten in the shower yet.</div><div>
</div><div>I confess that I don't trust myself to actually work out today, even though I really should.</div><div>
</div><div>I confess that I feel like FFF had an effect on this board. I don't think it's a coincidence that the last two weeks have been a little slow. Ever since the first FFF a couple weeks ago, people are probably scared to get called out for stuff.</div>
Still here and still fabulous!
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Confessions : I confess that I feel like FFF had an effect on this board. I don't think it's a coincidence that the last two weeks have been a little slow. Ever since the first FFF a couple weeks ago, people are probably scared to get called out for stuff.
Posted by cu97tiger[/QUOTE]
I confess that I think this could be true! aw.
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Confessions : I think you're probably right and I think that sucks. Maybe it's just because I prefer to have open and honest relationships with people, but I don't understand why people would be afraid to get called out for things. If you say something controversial, it might cause controversy. That's not inherently BAD.
Posted by LivLeighton[/QUOTE]
<div>All of this exactly. As usual, Liv said it way better than I could.</div>
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Confessions : I think you're probably right and I think that sucks. Maybe it's just because I prefer to have open and honest relationships with people, but I don't understand why people would be afraid to get called out for things. If you say something controversial, it might cause controversy. That's not inherently BAD.
Posted by LivLeighton[/QUOTE]
<div>My guess is it isn't about controversy, it's about being worried you'll be flamed for being yourself. Ely asked people how they felt about her frequency of workout posts, and she still got flamed. I got flamed for being excited about my own wedding. Now, I know one person's flame doesn't mean the whole board feels that way, but I'm not surprised that people may be less open to sharing when there's a little voice in the back of their head that says 'someone might not like this.'</div>
Still here and still fabulous!
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Confessions : My guess is it isn't about controversy, it's about being worried you'll be flamed for being yourself. Ely asked people how they felt about her frequency of workout posts, and she still got flamed. I got flamed for being excited about my own wedding. Now, I know one person's flame doesn't mean the whole board feels that way, but I'm not surprised that people may be less open to sharing when there's a little voice in the back of their head that says 'someone might not like this.'
Posted by cu97tiger[/QUOTE]
I confess I agree.
I also confess that I don't think I'll get anything done at work today because I'm in FRIDAY MODE.
and I confess there are free donuts at work... so I'm hiding in my cube avoiding everyone until they're gone!
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Confessions : My guess is it isn't about controversy, it's about being worried you'll be flamed for being yourself. Ely asked people how they felt about her frequency of workout posts, and she still got flamed. I got flamed for being excited about my own wedding. Now, I know one person's flame doesn't mean the whole board feels that way, but I'm not surprised that people may be less open to sharing when there's a little voice in the back of their head that says 'someone might not like this.'
Posted by cu97tiger[/QUOTE]
<div>This. I think people are scared to be annoying or have something they do be called annoying when they obviously don't think it is (or they probably wouldn't post it). I think, like tiger said, people are afraid of the criticism of core aspects of themselves. Nobody can make you feel bad about yourself without your permission, but people are astoundingly open on this board, so their guard is down a bit. I dunno, on the one hand I understand it. On the other hand, people lose sight of the fact that many of us don't really know one another. Or maybe we do and that's why it hurts that much more. </div>
[QUOTE]I confess that I'm excited Mo has his ice fishing weekend this weekend and will be away. I love him dearly but enjoy a weekend to myself now and again for just "me time." When I see people on the board be like "I can't spend a night away from BF/FI/H, it's awful!" then I feel like a bad SO for feeling this way. I confess that I already told my parents I'd go see them, but that it is now supposed to snow and I'm not sure I want to drive north in the snow. They will understand, but it still makes me feel like a bad daughter. <strong> I confess that I feel guilty about a lot of things I really shouldn't feel guilty about </strong>(see above two confessions). I confess that I trimmed two of Earl's nails too close to the quick when he squirmed (he HATES getting his nails trimmed) and he bled a little and I cried because I hurt him.<strong> I confess that I have no idea what I want to do with my life and I'm a little jealous that Mo has a job that he loves and one that is so "right" for him. I need help finding that.</strong> I confess that I want to eat food that is terrible for me pretty much nonstop every day. Right now I just really want McDonalds hotcakes with sausage and that fake maple syrup. I have no idea why. I also confess that if I start eating badly I can't stop.<strong> I confess that I've had dreams every night for the past week that Mo has proposed and I get really frustrated when I wake up and it's not true. I'm getting antsy and I don't like feeling this way. I know it is time for another (real) timeline talk..</strong>
Posted by LivLeighton[/QUOTE]
I feel guilty about shite I shouldn't feel guilty about all the time.<div>
</div><div>I also have no idea what I want to do with my life either and BF has a super awesome paying job that he loves.</div><div>
</div><div>I also feel guilty that I make like no money and have a ton of debt that I'm trying to pay off because I went shopping and to the spa too much. My bf pays for like 90% of everything. The only thing I contribute to the household is groceries. The rest of my money goes towards my own personal expenses, not household expenses. If BF ever left me I don't know what I would do, not just emotionally but also moneywise. I feel TERRIBLE that I'm not contributing.</div><div>
</div><div>I have dreams where BF proposes all the time too. I've decided that on leap year day if he hasn't proposed I will have a talk with him about it. Because I want to know where things are headed.</div><div>
</div><div>Also, BF is wonderful and is doing the majority of the housework so I can study. Some of the time I say I'm studying, I come on the knot or go on facebook, but tell my BF I'm studying so I don't have to do chores. I know it's wrong, but if I didn't do it I would literally have no time not spent at work, studying or doing chores.</div>
[QUOTE]I confess that after working really hard to get a degree from a good university, I'm not sure that I even want to do what I got the degree in. And I don't really feel like going to grad school for MORE school when I'm really not positive what I want to do. Truthfully, I think I could be happy doing something completely unrelated like a desk job as long as I wasn't miserable and FI and I are pulling in enough money to live how we want to. This puts a lot of pressure on FI though, because he DOES want to use his degree, but it really rough economically out there right now. I feel like I wasted 4 years on something that I don't want to do. I also confess that FI's weight loss attempt is starting to get on my nerves. He is doing good about going to the gym, but he isn't doing good at making smart food choices. I try to help, but he just gets upset if I suggest he eat this instead of that. He says that he really wants to lose the weight, but he's just not doing it well.
Posted by swhite2012[/QUOTE]
I know what you mean. I feel like I've wasted a ton of money on a degree that isn't going to get me anywhere. It's a horrible feeling.
Maybe with your FI, you could try doing the grocery shopping and meal planning. If there aren't bad choices in the house, it'll be harder for him to make bad choices and he won't be hearing anything from you. You can even monitor portion control by only making enough for one plate for you each. And if you don't have time to cook every day, you could always cook a bunch at one time and freeze stuff or put it in the fridge. He might be more likely to pick healthy options if they're sitting there ready for him. Another option is to maybe offer some kind of reward if he does the healthy eating. I don't know if he'd be open to that idea, but you could get on it too so it's not just him that has to change his habits. Although, I don't know exactly what your habits are either. Good luck!
[QUOTE]I may be in the minority here, but I don't agree with all the "only you can control how you feel" and "we're all a bunch of internet strangers so even if we rip on your life choices, it shouldn't bother you in the least." I actually think it can hurt someone, and to say oh well, that's their problem, sucks. and I hate the other justification that the board used to be so much worse. I wasn't around back then, and I probably wouldn't have posted then. I'm talking in major generalizations here -which I know some people won't like. It's just an overall opinion about flaming.
Posted by polo1425[/QUOTE]
<div>So if someone continuously (or even just once) does/says something on the board that I don't agree with or that is wrong or annoying, I should just sit back & not say a word because I might hurt their feelings? No thank you. I wouldn't act that way towards my best friend IRL so why should I do that here? </div><div>
</div><div>I don't think anyone here has ever set out to attack or hurt someone else in any FFF thread or any posts for that matter. </div><div>
</div><div>Edited for grammar.</div>
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Confessions : I know what you mean. I feel like I've wasted a ton of money on a degree that isn't going to get me anywhere. It's a horrible feeling. Maybe with your FI, you could try doing the grocery shopping and meal planning. If there aren't bad choices in the house, it'll be harder for him to make bad choices and he won't be hearing anything from you. You can even monitor portion control by only making enough for one plate for you each. And if you don't have time to cook every day, you could always cook a bunch at one time and freeze stuff or put it in the fridge. He might be more likely to pick healthy options if they're sitting there ready for him. Another option is to maybe offer some kind of reward if he does the healthy eating. I don't know if he'd be open to that idea, but you could get on it too so it's not just him that has to change his habits. Although, I don't know exactly what your habits are either. Good luck!
Posted by elannis[/QUOTE]<div>
</div><div>Thanks ely. I try, but we have very different schedules, so it's tough to make food together, and by the time we're both home and together, we're too tired to cook...lol. I also need to make better, healthier choices. I have in my head that since I'm not trying to lose weight, that I shouldn't have to give up treats, but I know that's so wrong and I need to be healthier too, not just for him but for myself.
</div>
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Confessions : Thanks ely. I try, but we have very different schedules, so it's tough to make food together, and by the time we're both home and together, we're too tired to cook...lol. I also need to make better, healthier choices. I have in my head that since I'm not trying to lose weight, that I shouldn't have to give up treats, but I know that's so wrong and I need to be healthier too, not just for him but for myself.
Posted by swhite2012[/QUOTE]
Well maybe if you guys have a free day or a weekend or something, you can take some time and just cook together. It's kind of a fun bonding experience, you both learn new stuff, and then you'll have a lot of food that you can freeze and grab at any time. This probably doesn't work if you don't like cooking though, lol.
And my FI has tried to make an effort to eat healthier because he knows I need to and it helps immensely. It's so hard to eat well with him sitting over there munching on popcorn. In the end, I'm responsible for my actions and know I need to do well no matter what everyone else is doing, but if he eats better, it makes it a lot easier for me to as well. Plus, it makes you feel better and gives you more energy, so you would benefit from that too ... and just sneak the Cadbury creme eggs in your car on the way home, lol.
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Confessions : I'm sorry you feel this way. And I think it was ridiculous that you got "flamed" about being excited about your wedding. But I think that some of this comes down to just how you feel about yourself, too. Like, do YOU feel you are "too excited" about your own wedding? No? (Of course not!) Then who cares? I guess to me it doesn't matter if one person on a message board thinks that there is an issue with something I post one day, so it wouldn't be in the back of my head that someone might not like this.<strong> Or, if there is a greater issue, then I'd look at that, decide if I wanted to change something about the way I post or about the way I view things, and go from there. </strong>Does that make sense?
Posted by LivLeighton[/QUOTE]
<div>I 100% agree with this. I'm not saying people SHOULD be shy about what they are posting, I'm just surmising that that is why the board has been a little slow these past couple weeks.</div><div>
</div><div>Look, I got voted most AW'ish a couple months back. I thought about it, and realized that I was putting every little WR thing on here and that yes, it probably wasn't the right forum for it. It was a legitimate flame (disguised as an award). When I got called out for being overzealous and accused of not focusing on more important things than my wedding, I thought about it and determined that I disagree. FI and I have a good balance, yes, we're planning a massive party for our family and friends, but we also are really excited about committing ourselves to each other, so I'm confident my priorities are in the right place. </div><div>
</div><div>But, I've definitely found myself stopping to think twice about starting threads (even non-WR ones), so I'm just guessing that I'm not the only one.</div></div>
Still here and still fabulous!