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Not Engaged Yet
wedding91011bride
member
So, I can post here?
Oh wow. This board makes me happy. When I joined, I told the computer that I was engaged, but I'm really not. I was just too embarrassed to admit that I was on this site with out a ring. So, I'm not that weird after all?
This discussion has been closed.
Re: So, I can post here?
Many of us are not engaged but are in committed relationships that we know will eventually lead to being engaged and then married... but we are all content with the status of our relationships as they are... sometimes we get impatient but for the most part, we are here to speak with other ladies just like us...
Tell as a little about yourself?
Have you ever used the phrase "Future FI"?
Are you currently planning your wedding (more than just day dreaming)?
Have you ever considered yourself "unofficially engaged"?
If you answer no to all of those questions feel free to stay and post. Also please read the sticky threads at the top of the board.
[QUOTE]9.10.11 Yipppeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Posted by wedding91011bride[/QUOTE]
I'm a little nervous... THIS makes you weird! <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/scripts/tinymce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-undecided.gif" border="0" alt="Undecided" title="Undecided" />
I don't generally care about age, but since you mentioned his parents, how old are you, hun?
[QUOTE]Well, we've talked about it and know that's the date we want, but it's just not official yet. His parents are being horrible and telling him to slow down. But we know we are ready. When you know, you just know, right?
Posted by wedding91011bride[/QUOTE]
ZOMG you <em>are </em>crazy.
I'm 23
[QUOTE]That's a good point. We both tend to be a little impulsive, so his parents making him slow down might be a good thing. But I just really want to start planning. I think they'll let him do it in 6 months. <strong>Can I start planning now</strong>? I'm 23
Posted by wedding91011bride[/QUOTE]
NO, not until you're engaged.
Is your boyfriend underage and unable to make decisions himself?
However, you should not be planning your wedding already if you are not enaged. I see your comment on your month board was just the day, but if you don't have a venue booked (which you shouldn't because you aren't engaged) if isn't set in stone.
Typically when parents think you are moving too fast they have a good reason. How old are you both? How long have you been dating?
EDIT: the stuff with her age was posted while I was typing. Disregard.
I am rather currious about "letting him" ? What is that?
91011 - While still pretty young, at 23 you and your boyfriend should be capable of making your own decisions. Why are his parents stopping you from being engaged? Who's going to pay for the wedding?
He's 23 too, but he never does anything to piss his parents off. It's been kind of a thing with us while we've been together. My parents aren't really that type, so it's foreign to me. I think it's our lives to live. They don't. But he does live with them, so he kind of has to live by their rules right now.
[QUOTE]That's a good point. We both tend to be a little impulsive, so his parents making him slow down might be a good thing. But I just really want to start planning.<strong> I think they'll let him do it in 6 months. Can I start planning now? I'm 23
</strong>Posted by wedding91011bride[/QUOTE]
(Oh, boy! I was wrong! You not just weird, you're crazy!)
NO! You can NOT start planning...
1. You are not engaged.
2. You're boyfriends parents are right for making you both slow down since you 'both tend to be a little impulsive'
3. If you can honestly word it that 'they'll LET him do it 6 months. You are absolutely NOT ready to be married!!
We've been together for 6 months.
[QUOTE]That's a good point. We both tend to be a little impulsive, so his parents making him slow down might be a good thing. But I just really want to start planning. I think they'll let him do it in 6 months. Can I start planning now? I'm 23
Posted by wedding91011bride[/QUOTE]
Seriously? His parents have a say in this? You are both adults, although considering your parents' opinions is often a good idea, saying that they will "let him do it" makes me wonder about his maturity.
And no you cannot start planning now because you are not engaged. Wedding planning is for engaged people.
[QUOTE]We will pay for it. Nothing fancy because we are young and don't make a lot of money. We've been together for 6 months.
Posted by wedding91011bride[/QUOTE]
6 months? Why the rush to get married? You've got the rest of your lives to be together. Wait until you've been together a few years, he's not living with his parents, and you can afford the wedding you want. It's a win-win-win.
Best of luck to you both.
[QUOTE]He's not the most mature person I know. But we are in love. I figure I can help him grow up.
Posted by wedding91011bride[/QUOTE]
NO! NO! NO! OH MY GOD NO! Come on, I'm only 20 and I know that you can't marry someone expecting to change them. You marry a person that you can accept 100% even if they never change. You shouldn't even be talking about marriage with this man.
That's a good point SeaTea. I've never really thought of it that way.
[QUOTE]Wow. What happened? Did I do something to offend you guys?
Posted by wedding91011bride[/QUOTE]
Lurk moar.
[QUOTE]He's not the most mature person I know. But we are in love. I figure I can help him grow up.
Posted by wedding91011bride[/QUOTE]
There is something wrong with EVERY part of this!!
1. "He's not the most mature person I know." - STOP right there... If he is 23 years old and NOT mature, he probably won't grow out of it any time soon! Clearly, you aren't mature either! Marriage is for MATURE individuals. End of Story!
2. "But we are in love" - Chances are you are in LUST not love... learn the difference!
3. "I figure I can help him grow up." - You can't! He has to grow up on his own. You both need to grow up. Get an education, get a career, learn more about each other and only then should you even THINK about getting married.
So, if you guys don't think I should get married are you okay with me even lurking moar?