I know this probably sounds weird, but I have a really hard time with being a bride. I hate being the center of attention and I hate having people do things for me. I am being very hands off on catering, wedding dress, DJ....just everything. I don't want to meet with the DJ and just said we want the basic thing and maybe we'll meet with him the week of the wedding. The hotel where we are having our reception said we could come in for a tasting, but we just plan on bbq and potato salad or something simple so bbq tastes like bbq, nothing special so no need to taste it. I'm just going to order a wedding dress from David's Bridal online rather than go into the store because I don't want anyone waiting on me. I just hate having people do things for me, maybe because I feel like I'm bothering them or taking up their time, even though I know it's their job.
Re: I don't feel entitled to be a bride.
But this is a deeper seated problem. You have a serious self esteem issue and inferiority compex. I mean that. The associates at the bridal stores and such are being paid to offer a service. I do not think you should be an entitled brat and kick them around, but how do you expect the DJ, florist, and other people you are paying to know what you want if you dont communicate that? Its not a waste of their time, its their job and most people want to do it well.
I really think theres something wrong here. Your entire post just reeks of sadness and depression. I dont know if its about the wedding, who youre marrying, or just yourself in general, but I very seriously think you should look into some counseling. Being shy is one thing. Thinking you dont deserve nice things or anything is something totally different.
and BBQ just doesn't taste like BBQ, any decent cook knows how much the flavor can vary (and barf at serving it at a wedding).