MOH, here. I am trying to make the best of a very bad situation within the BP (as usual, is made up of friends from several different circles in the brides life). At the bachelorette party two groups of friends which don't get along for petty reasons got into some really mean and upsetting words, and fighting back and forth. Both groups thought the other was being rude and giving attitude, creating a vicious cycle that built up over the evening. I did not know this was going on during the evening. I'm now trying to deal with the aftermath as a neutral third party (I'm not from either circle of friends involved in the dispute)
Everyone is trying to move on and put it past them, but unfortunately, the bride was clued into the drama before it was smoothed over. She is extremely upset with what happened between her friends and is so torn. She is terribly afraid of something happening at the wedding

I've addressed all the bridesmaids to get it out in the open that this happened, and that everyone has to be civil to each other and focus on our friend, the bride. People are apologizing to the bride for causing problems, and no one wants anything similar to happen at the wedding. All are agreed on that.
I guess my question is, are there any suggestions on what can I/we do to ease the bride's fears about any further drama, and soften the knowledge that her closest friends don't get along? I'm really at a lose for what to do. Thanks
Re: Discord in the WP
"I think bablingbrooke is the 13 yr old marring her cousin at the town hall. Lets all give her a big hand. And hope her inbred children can live normal lives." -tabs.
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If something happens at the wedding, I don't think it's unreasonable of you to take someone aside and get them away from the situation. But hopefully, unless these girls are all total pieces of trash, they will be civil to each other for the bride's sake, or at least ignore each other.
If a big fight happens that's out of your control, have a staff member escort the troublemakers out.
[QUOTE]MOH, here. I am trying to make the best of a very bad situation within the BP (as usual, is made up of friends from several different circles in the brides life). At the bachelorette party two groups of friends which don't get along for petty reasons got into some really mean and upsetting words, and fighting back and forth. Both groups thought the other was being rude and giving attitude, creating a vicious cycle that built up over the evening. I did not know this was going on during the evening. I'm now trying to deal with the aftermath as a neutral third party (I'm not from either circle of friends involved in the dispute) Everyone is trying to move on and put it past them, but unfortunately, the bride was clued into the drama before it was smoothed over. She is extremely upset with what happened between her friends and is so torn.<strong> She is terribly afraid of something happening at the wedding</strong> :'( <strong>I've addressed all the bridesmaids to get it out in the open that this happened, and that everyone has to be civil to each other and focus on our friend, the bride. </strong>People are apologizing to the bride for causing problems, and <strong>no one wants anything similar to happen at the wedding. All are agreed on that.</strong> I guess my question is, are there any suggestions on what can I/we do to ease the bride's fears about any further drama, and soften the knowledge that her closest friends don't get along? I'm really at a lose for what to do. Thanks
Posted by PinkSapphires[/QUOTE]
It's kind of far fetched to say that an altercation between bm's that happened at a bachelorette (were they likely drunk?) that something would happen at the wedding. Think about it. The bachelorette just consisted of the bm's and were peers of each other.. do you really think they will act the same way in front of the brides's parents or grandparents or the priest or the dj etc? Likely, they will feel like a fool in front of all those people.. and I don't think they would want to be put on the spot like that in front of everyone and appear to be trashy.
Okay so you said you addressed all the bridesmaids and all agreed that they will try to NOT let anything like this happen again. You said everyone agreed that they wouldn't want something to happen at the wedding. Therefore, there is nothing more you can do. You did what you could. Just trust them that they will act like grown ups at a family related event of the bride.
Your thinking too much into this. Most spats between bm's are not done publicly at the wedding in front of all family and friends. It's likely you are overreacting a little. or try to convince the bride that she is overreacting a little bit too and she can't control every little thing such as little spats between her bm's
Also, if the bride is talking with you about how upset she is with all this (I wouldn't bring it up with her if I were you, but by all means provide a shoulder to cry on if you wish) ... I would gently remind her that just because the BMs are friends with HER doesn't mean that they need to be friends with each other.
If these girls are from different groups of friends, then they will likely never speak to each other again after the wedding ... even if they hadn't been fighting. The BMs don't all need to become a group of buddies. They're there because of their friendship with the bride, and that's all. If they happen to make friends as a result, awesome, but that doesn't happen all that often.
I don't know if apologies will be extended between the groups, but as long as the bride is assured by them that they have moved on, and nothing even remotely similar will happen at the wedding, then I agree, that seems to be the best we can do. Hopefully this won't seem so bad in the next couple of weeks.
Thank you again!
"I think bablingbrooke is the 13 yr old marring her cousin at the town hall. Lets all give her a big hand. And hope her inbred children can live normal lives." -tabs.
A word of warning from your friends at Cracked.com: Remember that text is going to be how you make your first impression over the internet; if every third word you type is misspelled, people will automatically assume that you're a moron.
"I think bablingbrooke is the 13 yr old marring her cousin at the town hall. Lets all give her a big hand. And hope her inbred children can live normal lives." -tabs.
A word of warning from your friends at Cracked.com: Remember that text is going to be how you make your first impression over the internet; if every third word you type is misspelled, people will automatically assume that you're a moron.