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Not Engaged Yet
tinajones1012
member
Unofficial Engagement and Roommate Issue.. Need help!
My BF and I are having our one year anniversary. We have talked about marriage since about 3 months into our relationship, and are pretty much unofficially engaged. We want to get married in October of 2012. I know what dress I want, the engagement ring I want (its a pretty Tocari ring!!!), where we want it, my BM dresses, basically everything. I am just waiting for my ring!
My roommate just got engaged this summer to her BF after about 4.5 years of ebing together. My issue is that because she is engaged and I am not she thinks she is way better than me! She always tells me that its not smart to have my wedding planned out. But I say I know we will be together and I know what I want, so why wait? She also says that I shouldnt call my BF my hubby and his family my inlaws because thats a lie, but I do it because its easier than saying my BF's family or my BF. Am I right?
I basically think she is jealous of me... I lived with my BF this summer for a bit and she has never lived with her BF. She tells me it doesnt matter if you live together before marriage but I think it does. Her parents are just old school and won't let them live together. I can't imagine NOT living together before getting married. And I showed her my ring a couple times and she said its pretty but that I can find the same thing cheaper at a local jewler,But her BF just got her some .5 carat stone (.75 total( and I think she is kind of jealous because the one I am getting is a 1.5 Tocari 3-diamond engagement ring.
I don't even think she and her BF love eachother. I know they say they are busy with school and work, but they only see eachother like 2 times a week. But they live about 15 minutes apart! I go home every weekend to see my hubby (we live about 2 hours apart while I am in school).
LOL, well basically this has turned into a rant about my crazy roommate, but how can I tell this bia to back off?????? THANKS! 
~Tina&Jo~
~11/2/2009~
~10/6/2012~
~WI&MS~
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Unofficial Engagement and Roommate Issue.. Need help!
Slow your roll.
ETA: What is up with all the trollies lately? At least there is a bit of effort in this one.
It is none of your damn business why they don't live together. Just because it's what you want or prefer does not mean it will have any impact on their relationship. Also on spending time together - they have their priorities in the right place and maybe instead of picking things apart could actually learn something. Throwing out designer names and terms like "hubby" and unofficially engaged shows how clueless and lack of mature level headedness there is with you.
You should totally plan everyhting out and no need to talk to your BOYFRIEND about it because you already know what you want. Have a nice life.
[QUOTE]My BF and I are having our one year anniversary. We have talked about marriage since about 3 months into our relationship, and are pretty much unofficially engaged. We want to get married in October of 2012. <strong>I know what dress I want, the engagement ring I want (its a pretty Tocari ring!!!),</strong> where we want it, my BM dresses, basically everything. I am just waiting for my ring! My roommate just got engaged this summer to her BF after about 4.5 years of ebing together. My issue is that because she is engaged and I am not she thinks she is way better than me! She always tells me that its not smart to have my wedding planned out. But I say I know we will be together and I know what I want, so why wait? She also says that I shouldnt call my BF my hubby and his family my inlaws because thats a lie, but I do it because its easier than saying my BF's family or my BF. Am I right? I basically think she is jealous of me... I lived with my BF this summer for a bit and she has never lived with her BF. She tells me it doesnt matter if you live together before marriage but I think it does. Her parents are just old school and won't let them live together. I can't imagine NOT living together before getting married. And I showed her my ring a couple times and she said its pretty but that I can find the same thing cheaper at a local jewler,But her BF just got her some .5 carat stone (.75 total( and<strong> I think she is kind of jealous because the one I am getting is a 1.5 Tocari 3-diamond engagement ring</strong>. I don't even think she and her BF love eachother. I know they say they are busy with school and work, but they only see eachother like 2 times a week. But they live about 15 minutes apart! I go home every weekend to see my hubby (we live about 2 hours apart while I am in school). LOL, well basically this has turned into a rant about my crazy roommate, but how can I tell this bia to back off?????? THANKS!
Posted by tinajones1012[/QUOTE]
When you say you know the ring you want, I assume your BF hasn't bought it yet. I don't think she'd be jealous of your imaginary ring...just sayin'
Is it too early to call MUD?
[QUOTE]My BF and I are having our one year anniversary. We have talked about marriage since about 3 months into our relationship, and are pretty much unofficially engaged. We want to get married in October of 2012. I know what dress I want, the engagement ring I want (its a pretty Tocari ring!!!), where we want it, my BM dresses, basically everything. I am just waiting for my ring! My roommate just got engaged this summer to her BF after about 4.5 years of ebing together. My issue is that because she is engaged and I am not she thinks she is way better than me! She always tells me that its not smart to have my wedding planned out. But I say I know we will be together and I know what I want, so why wait? She also says that I shouldnt call my BF my hubby and his family my inlaws because thats a lie, but I do it because its easier than saying my BF's family or my BF. Am I right? I basically think she is jealous of me... I lived with my BF this summer for a bit and she has never lived with her BF. She tells me it doesnt matter if you live together before marriage but I think it does. Her parents are just old school and won't let them live together. I can't imagine NOT living together before getting married. And I showed her my ring a couple times and she said its pretty but that I can find the same thing cheaper at a local jewler,But her BF just got her some .5 carat stone (.75 total( and I think she is kind of jealous because the one I am getting is a 1.5 Tocari 3-diamond engagement ring. I don't even think she and her BF love eachother. I know they say they are busy with school and work, but they only see eachother like 2 times a week. But they live about 15 minutes apart! I go home every weekend to see my hubby (we live about 2 hours apart while I am in school). LOL, well basically this has turned into a rant about my crazy roommate, but how can I tell this bia to back off?????? THANKS!
Posted by tinajones1012[/QUOTE]
Hi.... oh man, I'm guessing this is MUD, but I'll play along in case.
First, welcome! I'm glad you've found someone you love and want to spend your life with. That's wonderful. Now, regardless of how your roommate and you feel about it, this is not a competition or race. How you do things isn't necessarily what works best for her, and vice versa. So in terms of living together, rings, etc. stop comparing notes. Really, this isn't a case of 'right' or 'wrong'. Have you seen Bride Wars? Do you know the moral of the story? That the wedding isn't the goal - ultimately having a great relationship and being with the person you love is what's important, as well as treating your friends with respect and kindness. Try to keep that in mind or you might lose a friend here.
Second, my personal opinion is that it's silly to get engaged when you will be engaged for a longer period of time than you've been dating thus far. You don't need 2 years to plan a wedding, you don't even need a full year. Just enjoy the wonderful stage your relationship is at now and don't rush things. Don't plan your wedding yet - talking hypothetically about getting married someday is fantastic, but don't rob yourselves of the opportunity to experience being engaged together. Trust me, I got a little ahead of myself with saving pictures from TheKnot.com and thinking about wedding flowers, so I do understand. But these girls made me realize that it's an awful lot of fun to go through the process together when you can plan for real - because ultimately the wedding is for both the bride and groom, so he should have at least as much say in it.
Third, my personal opinion about name-brand rings is the same as your roommate. In terms of quality of diamond and style of ring, you can get something very similar and unique custom made for a lot cheaper than buying the name brand (Tacori in this case). And you're going about it backwards... you can't start with your dream ring and just expect him to buy it. You need to realize what his limits are in terms of what he can afford to spend, and then find something that works in those limits. Is a 2 carat Tacori ring in most people's budgets? Heck no. Is a .75 carat ring in a Tacori-style custom made unique ring a bit more reasonably priced? Yep! And honestly, after trying on rings myself, anything over 1 carat just looks huge for me. So keep that in mind!
Fourth, the word "hubby" is short for husband, which he is not. You can call him your "honey" or your "sweety" or any other name, but he's technically not your hubby so it sounds weird to hear that. Also, his family aren't your in-laws, though I do understand that it can seem easier. Again, in my own personal opinion, I wouldn't rob myself of the experience of actually getting married and being able to use those titles for real.
That's just my $0.02. If you're for real, please consider what everyone says with a grain of salt and listen (don't just yell at us for not agreeing with you). If you're not real and are here to cause drama, then let the games begin!
You sound suuuuper immature and whiney. I am going to guess you are about my age. I am 20. If you were my college roommate I would kick you in the seat of your pants for being a colossal dumbass. Oh yeah, and you sound like the jealous one.
Married! May 27th, 2012
[QUOTE]I am going to guess you are about my age. I am 20. If you were my college roommate I would kick you in the seat of your pants for being a colossal dumbass. Posted by SeaTea02[/QUOTE]
HAHAHA... you just became my favorite 20-year-old ever!!!!!
That's all I trust myself to say, I think.
[QUOTE]My BF and I are having our one year anniversary. We have talked about marriage since about 3 months into our relationship, and are pretty much unofficially engaged. We want to get married in October of 2012. I know what dress I want, the engagement ring I want (its a pretty Tocari ring!!!), where we want it, my BM dresses, basically everything. I am just waiting for my ring! My roommate just got engaged this summer to her BF after about 4.5 years of ebing together. My issue is that because she is engaged and I am not she thinks she is way better than me! She always tells me that its not smart to have my wedding planned out. But I say I know we will be together and I know what I want, so why wait? She also says that I shouldnt call my BF my hubby and his family my inlaws because thats a lie, but I do it because its easier than saying my BF's family or my BF. Am I right? I basically think she is jealous of me... I lived with my BF this summer for a bit and she has never lived with her BF. She tells me it doesnt matter if you live together before marriage but I think it does. Her parents are just old school and won't let them live together. I can't imagine NOT living together before getting married. And I showed her my ring a couple times and she said its pretty but that I can find the same thing cheaper at a local jewler,But her BF just got her some .5 carat stone (.75 total( and I think she is kind of jealous because the one I am getting is a 1.5 Tocari 3-diamond engagement ring. I don't even think she and her BF love eachother. I know they say they are busy with school and work, but they only see eachother like 2 times a week. But they live about 15 minutes apart! I go home every weekend to see my hubby (we live about 2 hours apart while I am in school). LOL, well basically this has turned into a rant about my crazy roommate, but how can I tell this bia to back off?????? THANKS!
Posted by tinajones1012[/QUOTE]
So I stopped reading after your first few sentences because you are being completely BSC and frankly I don't want to waste my time reading a crazy post. . I don't have half the stuff planned as you do and I'm actually engaged. Just STOP. Please read the intro thread.
Seriously, I don't get the whole troll thing. Why put that much effort into creating a fake account, then making up some bs story? You think you are being funny or ironic? Sounds like a serious need for attention. Did your daddy not love you enough or something? Ugh, just do us a favor and delete your fake account, you won't win any friends here.
[QUOTE]No, not a troll, sorry to disappoint. I have been in other LTRs before, so I know for sure that he is the one. And I am 22, thank you for asking. IDK, maybe what I am typing sounds crazier than it really is because its hard to read emotions through a screen. I just don't see what the problem is with pre-planning a wedding if I know hes the one and I know what I want? <strong>She and I have always been competitive about things like school work and grades, so I don't really think this is any different</strong>. And it doesn't have to be a Tacori ring, they just had the style I liked.
Posted by tinajones1012[/QUOTE]
She is winning.
[QUOTE]OK I don't know why everyone is saying TROLL or MUD (whatever that is) because im not trolling... I just want someone to tell me WHY I can't plan my wedding now!
Posted by tinajones1012[/QUOTE]
You totally can and should I'm sure your boyfriend will have no issues just agreeing to whatever you want - you should book your venue and buy your dress before it goes out of style..oh and make sure to send out those save the dates early to be sure no one has the nerve to do anything else on your day.
A wedding does not make a marriage but with your whining temper tantrum I can't imagine why he is waiting at all. Grow up.
[QUOTE]OK I don't know why everyone is saying TROLL or MUD (whatever that is) because im not trolling... I just want someone to tell me WHY I can't plan my wedding now!
Posted by tinajones1012[/QUOTE]
Because you are never getting married. Men don't marry trolls.
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Unofficial Engagement and Roommate Issue.. Need help! : She is winning.
Posted by AudgiePodge[/QUOTE]
Audgie- Your posts are full of wins. The fact that your siggy is an astronaut bichon makes you pretty freaking awesome.
[QUOTE]OK I don't know why everyone is saying TROLL or MUD (whatever that is) because im not trolling...<strong> I just want someone to tell me WHY I can't plan my wedding now!
</strong>Posted by tinajones1012[/QUOTE]
Because planning a wedding is was engaged people do. Once you're engaged (like your roomate and her .5 carat ring) you can start planning.
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Unofficial Engagement and Roommate Issue.. Need help! : Because planning a wedding is was engaged people do. Once you're engaged (like your roomate and her .5 carat ring) you can start planning.
Posted by MLekathLEEN[/QUOTE]
This totally made me *gigglesnort*
Sweetie, none of us are going to throw confetti for you because you announced that you're not engaged, yet. I wouldn't expect your roommate to do so, either.
For the love of GOD, read this post.
I am repeating my self but you sound so whiney. "WHY cant i plan my wedding nooooow!"
because no one asked you to marry them or agreed to marry you! Because if they had, you would be a little thing our society called e-n-g-a-g-e-d. I know lots of girls like you, planning their big day that is two years away because they are impatient little brats who want every thing nownownow.
Readjust your attitude.
That is all i have for now but let me know if you need more help.
[QUOTE]Girl, you are crazy! This sounds familiar. You sound a LOT like my room mate (so insecure that she must put down everything and everyone in her sight and the whole "hubby" thing... ugh, don't get me started!). Instead of buying some expensive name brand ring and a dress, maybe you should invest in some therapy. Are you really from Milwaukee? P.S. My ring is "only" .51 carats, and it is B-E-A-U-T-I-F-U-L!!! So suck it
Posted by wintek10[/QUOTE]
This could be interesting.... might you be roomies?
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Unofficial Engagement and Roommate Issue.. Need help! : This could be interesting.... might you be roomies?
Posted by SeaTea02[/QUOTE]
<div>
</div><div>No, I don't think my room mate is THIS crazy... And her name isn't Tina (if that is really her name). Maybe "Tina" and my room mate are crazy twins! </div>
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Unofficial Engagement and Roommate Issue.. Need help! : No, I don't think my room mate is THIS crazy... And her name isn't Tina (if that is really her name). Maybe "Tina" and my room mate are crazy twins!
Posted by wintek10[/QUOTE]
Darn. I was hoping this was a ROOMATE WARRRR!