June 2012 Weddings

"Normal" hair comment...

I just wanted to apologize to anyone who was offened to my "normal" hair comment. It was not meant to be offensive at all and by no means was me saying that super curly hair of different textures is not beautiful because I do not feel that way at all. I was just suggesting a method that has personally worked for my little sister very well and has made her much happier being able to spend less time (and less pain) on her own hair. I called it "normal" hair in quotations as to not sound offensive (clearly unsuccessfully) because I was trying to refer to what "normal" hair is referred to on shampoo bottles etc-which I just meant as more manageable and not needing so much time spent on. Really didnt mean to offend anyone or try and change the identity of a 3 year old. It was just an option that's Ive seen be successful. Also, I dont think its offensive saying people with curly hair would also like the opportunity to change it up and have different hairstyles..everyone likes to play around with different hair styles.  I personally have wavey hair and love to straighten it and curl it and put it in intricate updos... the keratin treatments allow my sister to do the same as well, something she couldnt do before. And once she started my mom didnt have to torture her everytime it needed to be washed. Definitely doesnt mean so she thinke her curly hair isnt beautiful, but she like options too. And that is my two cents. I just wanted to clear the air. Truly not meant to be offensive.

Here's the original post:
"Have you thought about getting her keratin treatments from the salon? My little sister (now 14) has the same hair as your daughter and it was awful combing out her hair and to this day she only washes it about once a week. It relaxes her hair so much that she can actually style her hair as anyone with "normal" hair can-but she still has her curls they're just more manageable. She has been getting these treatments once every few months (you can tell when her hair grows in that a new treatment is needed) for years now and it has been a life changer-for her and my poor mother who had to comb it out and deal with the "hair battles"! Good luck!"
Wedding Countdown Ticker
«13456

Re: "Normal" hair comment...

  • Thanks for acknowledging that it may not have been the best choice of words. I responded in the OP.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • Thank you for your apology.
  • No hard feelings girlie! Thank you though for coming back and apologizing. Very sweet!!
    Daisypath Anniversary tickers
  • Holy crap there are people offended by her saying "normal" hair?  Ever read shampoo bottles? There are plenty of different hairtypes, and they are categorized as such. 
    Not to mention, she put it in quotes meaning "hey I don't mean this as someone is only normal if they have this type of hair, more like normal as categorized by hairtypes".

    No need to create offense when there was none to begin with.
  • Chels, people are offended by everything nowadays.
  • Chels- I couldnt agree more.

    Jess- It's seriously so over the top ridiculous.... annoying.
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_normal-hair-comment?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:3ae4d68d-f10a-4dec-8810-da13c14a7b86Discussion:4942b81b-b99a-45f6-9109-cb8fab25289dPost:3bd5a915-17b9-4396-aa88-1194a7af2542">Re: "Normal" hair comment...</a>:
    [QUOTE]Chels, people are offended by everything nowadays.
    Posted by midgetthemighty[/QUOTE]

    I feel like 90% of the time people are offended by something, it's because they choose to be, not because it's something that truly hurts them.
    Dramaaaaaaa.

    Agreed Chels.. very annoying.
  • So over the top that I'm predicting someone will be offended by our lack of being offended by the original "normal" hair comment.

  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_normal-hair-comment?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:3ae4d68d-f10a-4dec-8810-da13c14a7b86Discussion:4942b81b-b99a-45f6-9109-cb8fab25289dPost:f9fc4ec7-73fd-46b2-bf62-f34c797f88a1">Re: "Normal" hair comment...</a>:
    [QUOTE]So over the top that I'm predicting someone will be offended by our lack of being offended by the original "normal" hair comment.
    Posted by midgetthemighty[/QUOTE]

    I had to read that three time to get it.. but true dat
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_normal-hair-comment?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:3ae4d68d-f10a-4dec-8810-da13c14a7b86Discussion:4942b81b-b99a-45f6-9109-cb8fab25289dPost:3bd5a915-17b9-4396-aa88-1194a7af2542">Re: "Normal" hair comment...</a>:
    [QUOTE]Chels, people are offended by everything nowadays.
    Posted by midgetthemighty[/QUOTE]

    agree
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_normal-hair-comment?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:3ae4d68d-f10a-4dec-8810-da13c14a7b86Discussion:4942b81b-b99a-45f6-9109-cb8fab25289dPost:f9fc4ec7-73fd-46b2-bf62-f34c797f88a1">Re: "Normal" hair comment...</a>:
    [QUOTE]So over the top that I'm predicting someone will be offended by our lack of being offended by the original "normal" hair comment.
    Posted by midgetthemighty[/QUOTE]

    I was actually expecting something to be posted by now....
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_normal-hair-comment?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:3ae4d68d-f10a-4dec-8810-da13c14a7b86Discussion:4942b81b-b99a-45f6-9109-cb8fab25289dPost:176871c4-efee-4424-8bf2-d52e242d99cf">Re: "Normal" hair comment...</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: "Normal" hair comment... : I had to read that three time to get it.. but true dat
    Posted by chelseamb11[/QUOTE]

    Haha...it is a confusing sentence. :) And I'll be going to lunch now. I'll check back to see how much this thread explodes.
  • chelseamb11chelseamb11 member
    2500 Comments Third Anniversary 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited April 2012
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_normal-hair-comment?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:3ae4d68d-f10a-4dec-8810-da13c14a7b86Discussion:4942b81b-b99a-45f6-9109-cb8fab25289dPost:c9b06ca3-825a-435a-8837-63cc7ea45489">Re: "Normal" hair comment...</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: "Normal" hair comment... : I was actually expecting something to be posted by now....
    Posted by chelseakopperud[/QUOTE]

    Hopefully it's because people realize they were being a little ridiculous (which is to be expected when we're all 1-2 months away from our weddings).
  • In Response to Re::[QUOTE]Holy crap there are people offended by her saying "normal" hair?nbsp; Ever read shampoo bottles? There are plenty of different hairtypes, and they are categorized as such.nbsp; Not to mention, she put it in quotes meaning "hey I don't mean this as someone is only normal if they have this type of hair, more like normal as categorized by hairtypes".No need to create offense when there was none to begin with. Posted by chelseamb11[/QUOTE]


    Couldn't agree more!
    Follow Me on Pinterest
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_normal-hair-comment?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:3ae4d68d-f10a-4dec-8810-da13c14a7b86Discussion:4942b81b-b99a-45f6-9109-cb8fab25289dPost:3bd5a915-17b9-4396-aa88-1194a7af2542">Re: "Normal" hair comment...</a>:
    [QUOTE]Chels, people are offended by everything nowadays.
    Posted by midgetthemighty[/QUOTE]

    Omg I feel so much better knowing I am not the only one who feels that way!
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_normal-hair-comment?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:3ae4d68d-f10a-4dec-8810-da13c14a7b86Discussion:4942b81b-b99a-45f6-9109-cb8fab25289dPost:41cb9c3d-a45b-41c1-b67e-4ab200609ca9">Re: "Normal" hair comment...</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: "Normal" hair comment... : Omg I feel so much better knowing I am not the only one who feels that way!
    Posted by LoveYouB[/QUOTE]

    Good! :)
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_normal-hair-comment?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:3ae4d68d-f10a-4dec-8810-da13c14a7b86Discussion:4942b81b-b99a-45f6-9109-cb8fab25289dPost:15c68d7a-2b9b-42c2-a7a8-2de582127648">Re: "Normal" hair comment...</a>:
    [QUOTE]Holy crap there are people offended by her saying "normal" hair?  <strong>Ever read shampoo bottles</strong>? There are plenty of different hairtypes, and they are categorized as such.  Not to mention, she put it in quotes meaning "hey I don't mean this as someone is only normal if they have this type of hair, more like normal as categorized by hairtypes". No need to create offense when there was none to begin with.
    Posted by chelseamb11[/QUOTE]

    <div>I just think that people on this board have different background and histories. As a white girl, I see the world "normal hair" and I think of shampoo bottles-hair that is not greasy, curly, too dry, dandruff etc.</div><div>
    </div><div>But someone else, especially women of color have a history of being told in the media and society that their hair isn't "normal" (meaning it's not as desirable as "white" hair, they need to put relaxers in their hair to make it "better", etc) and therefore seeing those words struck a cord. I don't think LoveYouB meant any offense, but I don't think it's a coincidence that the girls who are white on this board think the women who took offense were overreacting. And that the women who were offended happen to be women of color. </div>
    image
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_normal-hair-comment?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:3ae4d68d-f10a-4dec-8810-da13c14a7b86Discussion:4942b81b-b99a-45f6-9109-cb8fab25289dPost:d2fa56ec-8f4d-41f4-9c00-afc3c905d08a">Re: "Normal" hair comment...</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: "Normal" hair comment... : I just think that people on this board have different background and histories. As a white girl, I see the world "normal hair" and I think of shampoo bottles-hair that is not greasy, curly, too dry, dandruff etc.<strong> But someone else, especially women of color have a history of being told in the media and society that their hair isn't "normal" </strong>(meaning it's not as desirable as "white" hair, they need to put relaxers in their hair to make it "better", etc) and therefore seeing those words struck a cord. I don't think LoveYouB meant any offense, but I don't think it's a coincidence that the girls who are white on this board think the women who took offense were overreacting. And that the women who were offended happen to be women of color. 
    Posted by daria24[/QUOTE]

    I also think it's horribly presumptuous to think that white women are less accused of not being "normal" than black women. (**NO I AM NOT OFFENDED BY YOUR COMMENT <---disclaimer lol).
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_normal-hair-comment?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:3ae4d68d-f10a-4dec-8810-da13c14a7b86Discussion:4942b81b-b99a-45f6-9109-cb8fab25289dPost:d2fa56ec-8f4d-41f4-9c00-afc3c905d08a">Re: "Normal" hair comment...</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: "Normal" hair comment... : I just think that people on this board have different background and histories. As a white girl, I see the world "normal hair" and I think of shampoo bottles-hair that is not greasy, curly, too dry, dandruff etc. But someone else, especially women of color have a history of being told in the media and society that their hair isn't "normal" (meaning it's not as desirable as "white" hair, they need to put relaxers in their hair to make it "better", etc) and therefore seeing those words struck a cord. I don't think LoveYouB meant any offense, but I don't think it's a coincidence that the girls who are white on this board think the women who took offense were overreacting. And that the women who were offended happen to be women of color. 
    Posted by daria24[/QUOTE]


    <div>I wish everything didn't turn into a black-white thing.</div>
  • See, the problem with online forums is that everybody will read everything with different tones in their heads based on the culmination of their life's experiences. Personally, I don't think anyone has the right to say "you shouldn't be offended by that". Everyone has had a different life, a different upbringing, etc. If you weren't offended, great - move on. If you were offended, take her apology as a sincere attempt to rectify the misunderstanding.

    I was not offended by her comment, but I live in an area without much cultural diversity and constantly deal with misguided individuals who say things that don't make any sense to me. For example: "Why would you ever spend that much time on her hair to make it look like THAT?". Clearly comes from an ignorant individual who couldn't possible fathom that my child be mixed and her hair natural. It miffs me and makes me worry for her come school time, but on the other hand, I understand that my daughter has very light skin and other than her hair, could probably be mistaken as white by the average individual that has never met FI. I take this life experience and translate it into my online forum "life" so I'm not easily offended when people make ignorant comments, unless it's downright racist. I would never make the assumption that OP was racist based on that comment, so I move on with my day.

    But I would never say that others shouldn't be offended. Maybe one of those girls grew up and was teased about her hair. We don't know. Our personal lifes and experiences translate into our online lives very easily, but don't judge people for that because we ALL do it, in one way or another.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_normal-hair-comment?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:3ae4d68d-f10a-4dec-8810-da13c14a7b86Discussion:4942b81b-b99a-45f6-9109-cb8fab25289dPost:bf2867ff-426a-48da-b543-79e048fc3f4a">Re: "Normal" hair comment...</a>:
    [QUOTE]See, the problem with online forums is that everybody will read everything with different tones in their heads based on the culmination of their life's experiences. Personally, I don't think anyone has the right to say "you shouldn't be offended by that". Everyone has had a different life, a different upbringing, etc. If you weren't offended, great - move on. If you were offended, take her apology as a sincere attempt to rectify the misunderstanding. I was not offended by her comment, but I live in an area without much cultural diversity and constantly deal with misguided individuals who say things that don't make any sense to me. For example: "Why would you ever spend that much time on her hair to make it look like THAT?". Clearly comes from an ignorant individual who couldn't possible fathom that my child be mixed and her hair natural. It miffs me and makes me worry for her come school time, but on the other hand, I understand that my daughter has very light skin and other than her hair, could probably be mistaken as white by the average individual that has never met FI. I take this life experience and translate it into my online forum "life" so I'm not easily offended when people make ignorant comments, unless it's downright racist. I would never make the assumption that OP was racist based on that comment, so I move on with my day. But I would never say that others shouldn't be offended. Maybe one of those girls grew up and was teased about her hair. We don't know. Our personal lifes and experiences translate into our online lives very easily, but don't judge people for that because we ALL do it, in one way or another.
    Posted by rasp.berry[/QUOTE]

    So she put "normal" in quotes to prevent anyone from being offended.... she made an obvious attempt at making sure she wouldnt offend anyone... I read her comment and it was SOOOOO obvious that she was trying to HELP you.... yet everyone jumped down her throat. I dont get it. I could choose to be offended by TONS of things in a given day.... but I assume the best in people and I dont take things out of context. I get that if you take "normal" out of context that people of any race or background could be offended by that.... but if you read her comment in its entiretly, its obvious she isnt being offensive at all.... not even a little bit.

    P.S. I agree with Kelsey.... its annoying that EVERYTHING goes back to a race issue. Geez.
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_normal-hair-comment?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:3ae4d68d-f10a-4dec-8810-da13c14a7b86Discussion:4942b81b-b99a-45f6-9109-cb8fab25289dPost:85f1b492-9d27-4627-b810-bd1b99ffb828">Re: "Normal" hair comment...</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: "Normal" hair comment... : I also think it's horribly presumptuous to think that white women are less accused of not being "normal" than black women. (**NO I AM NOT OFFENDED BY YOUR COMMENT <---disclaimer lol).
    Posted by chelseamb11[/QUOTE]

    <div>I think most people, at one time or another, have been accused of being "not normal" in one way or the other (weight, height, level of intelligence, level of coordination, etc). So I agree with you there. I was just trying to point out that we all come into every discussion with our own history, and therefore we all get offended by different things. </div><div>
    </div><div>And I am not offended by your comment either :)</div>
    image
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_normal-hair-comment?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:3ae4d68d-f10a-4dec-8810-da13c14a7b86Discussion:4942b81b-b99a-45f6-9109-cb8fab25289dPost:3097182a-972b-41b8-b06e-dc5e19a4ea18">Re: "Normal" hair comment...</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: "Normal" hair comment... : I think most people, at one time or another, have been accused of being "not normal" in one way or the other (weight, height, level of intelligence, level of coordination, etc). So I agree with you there. I was just trying to point out that we all come into every discussion with our own history, and therefore we all get offended by different things.  And I am not offended by your comment either :)
    Posted by daria24[/QUOTE]

    I agree, but I think the thing we all need to remember is that we are all adults and we cant take everything personally. If you read her entire comment, there was no offensive language at all.... it was obvious she was trying to help the OP and not say her daughter had hair that isnt normal. I mean really.... couldnt the poster being accused of offending people be offended that people find her offensive? I mean seriously.... we all need to step back and find the good in others and not assume the worst.
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • I'll say what I've said before, people have been getting annoyingly butt hurt over a lot of things for a while now and it makes it hard to have any conversations with people when so many things are taken as being offensive.
  • In Response to Re::[QUOTE]See, the problem with online forums is that everybody will read everything with different tones in their heads based on the culmination of their life's experiences. Personally, I don't think anyone has the right to say "you shouldn't be offended by that". Everyone has had a different life, a different upbringing, etc. If you weren't offended, great move on. If you were offended, take her apology as a sincere attempt to rectify the misunderstanding. I was not offended by her comment, but I live in an area without much cultural diversity and constantly deal with misguided individuals who say things that don't make any sense to me. For example: "Why would you ever spend that much time on her hair to make it look like THAT?". Clearly comes from an ignorant individual who couldn't possible fathom that my child be mixed and her hair natural. It miffs me and makes me worry for her come school time, but on the other hand, I understand that my daughter has very light skin and other than her hair, could probably be mistaken as white by the average individual that has never met FI. I take this life experience and translate it into my online forum "life" so I'm not easily offended when people make ignorant comments, unless it's downright racist. I would never make the assumption that OP was racist based on that comment, so I move on with my day.But I would never say that others shouldn't be offended. Maybe one of those girls grew up and was teased about her hair. We don't know. Our personal lifes and experiences translate into our online lives very easily, but don't judge people for that because we ALL do it, in one way or another. Posted by rasp.berry[/QUOTE]


    By mentioning that it may have to with someone's individual experience sometime in the past, it seems silly to accuse someone of saying something offensive on a public forum just because it struck a chord from the past. It wasn't the OP that wronged them, so why jump down her throat?
    Follow Me on Pinterest
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_normal-hair-comment?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:3ae4d68d-f10a-4dec-8810-da13c14a7b86Discussion:4942b81b-b99a-45f6-9109-cb8fab25289dPost:839e5e06-8764-4c35-9e7d-6739a202df56">Re: "Normal" hair comment...</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: "Normal" hair comment... : <strong>So she put "normal" in quotes</strong> to prevent anyone from being offended.... she made an obvious attempt at making sure she wouldnt offend anyone... I read her comment and it was SOOOOO obvious that she was trying to HELP you.... yet everyone jumped down her throat. I dont get it. I could choose to be offended by TONS of things in a given day.... but I assume the best in people and I dont take things out of context. I get that if you take "normal" out of context that people of any race or background could be offended by that.... but if you read her comment in its entiretly, its obvious she isnt being offensive at all.... not even a little bit. P.S. I agree with Kelsey.... its annoying that EVERYTHING goes back to a race issue. Geez.
    Posted by chelseakopperud[/QUOTE]

    Again, to reiterate my point - we all come from different background and are posting on a forum without any context. When people see something in "brackets", there could be many different meanings behind it that others read - sarcasm, comedy, stereotypes, etc.. I didnt say she wasn't trying to help me, nor did I complain about her comment. I simply suggested (in the OP) that in an online forum where there are a multitude of people with a hugely varied background, that she think about how something may come across to other people with a different background. In my opinion, it's common courtesy. I know a lot of women on TK (not this board in particular) don't follow this courtesy, and that's fine. The only person that reflects negatively on is themselves. I'm not going to go around saying I'm offended by it, I just choose not to partake.
     
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_normal-hair-comment?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:3ae4d68d-f10a-4dec-8810-da13c14a7b86Discussion:4942b81b-b99a-45f6-9109-cb8fab25289dPost:e451b165-b72f-4582-aff9-faeccd5267eb">Re:</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re:: By mentioning that it may have to with someone's individual experience sometime in the past, it seems silly to accuse someone of saying something offensive on a public forum just because it struck a chord from the past. It wasn't the OP that wronged them, so why jump down her throat?
    Posted by edw7479[/QUOTE]

    I don't know, maybe I didn't read through the responses closely enough (which is entirely possible, I skipped over most of the offended comments), but I didn't find anyone was particularly jumping down her throat in an attacking way. I found them more to be stating their opinions about her comment, which we are all entitled to. I`ll go back and read again.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_normal-hair-comment?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20Club%20BoardsForum:3ae4d68d-f10a-4dec-8810-da13c14a7b86Discussion:4942b81b-b99a-45f6-9109-cb8fab25289dPost:bf2867ff-426a-48da-b543-79e048fc3f4a">Re: "Normal" hair comment...</a>:
    [QUOTE]See, the problem with online forums is that everybody will read everything with different tones in their heads based on the culmination of their life's experiences. Personally, I don't think anyone has the right to say "you shouldn't be offended by that". Everyone has had a different life, a different upbringing, etc. If you weren't offended, great - move on. If you were offended, take her apology as a sincere attempt to rectify the misunderstanding. I was not offended by her comment, but I live in an area without much cultural diversity and constantly deal with misguided individuals who say things that don't make any sense to me. For example: "Why would you ever spend that much time on her hair to make it look like THAT?". Clearly comes from an ignorant individual who couldn't possible fathom that my child be mixed and her hair natural. It miffs me and makes me worry for her come school time, but on the other hand, I understand that my daughter has very light skin and other than her hair, could probably be mistaken as white by the average individual that has never met FI. I take this life experience and translate it into my online forum "life" so I'm not easily offended when people make ignorant comments, unless it's downright racist. I would never make the assumption that OP was racist based on that comment, so I move on with my day. But I would never say that others shouldn't be offended. Maybe one of those girls grew up and was teased about her hair. We don't know. Our personal lifes and experiences translate into our online lives very easily, but don't judge people for that because we ALL do it, in one way or another.
    Posted by rasp.berry[/QUOTE]

    But honestly, given the whole "ooh we all grew up differently", then anyone is allowed to be offended by anything.

    For example: My dad and I have a horribly shitty relationship.  based on your argument, I'm allowed to be offended anytime someone talks about or shows their good relationship with their dad.

    Or as someone who has never officially been plsu sized but has struggled with her weight since she could remember, someone else who is heavier than me could be offended when I say I'd love to lose weight.

    To me, offensive comes from the tone/meaning, not necessarily from the words. 
    IF the original post didn't put "normal" in " ", yeah I could see where it sounds like she's saying normal as in normal, not normal as in hairtype.  But she put it in quotes.

    But now we're just arguing semantics
  • edited April 2012
    I think there`s been MUCH more of a fuss made over how others shouldn`t be offended than about the original comment ladies!

    I read the posts again and there was... drumroll please... TWO COMMENTS about how the posters were offended. In a total of 38ish comments, I don`t think this was over the top OR out of place. There has to be at least 6+ comments in this thread about how no one should have ever been offended. Making a mountain out of a molehill?

    And no, using the "oooh we all grew up differently" was not my excuse for them being offended. I was using it as a reference to prove my point.

    BTW, how is it fair that you all should be free to share your opinion on people being offended by this subject, but for those 2 posters to be pointed out for having genuine feelings and opinions as well? Why is one fine, and the other not? Makes no sense.

    ETA: Regardless of what else has gone on, I got the answers I needed (along with some extra drama) so thank you everyone who contributed with their ideas and suggestions. THAT is what this board should  be about - not who said what, who offended who, whose opinion is more important. Can we end it?
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-club-boards_june-2012-weddings_normal-hair-comment?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding Club BoardsForum:3ae4d68d-f10a-4dec-8810-da13c14a7b86Discussion:4942b81b-b99a-45f6-9109-cb8fab25289dPost:a89ca190-f350-44d8-ab7a-2a23b9af2f4d">Re: "Normal" hair comment...</a>:
    [QUOTE]I think there`s been MUCH more of a fuss made over how others shouldn`t be offended than about the original comment ladies! I read the posts again and there was... drumroll please... TWO COMMENTS about how the posters were offended. In a total of 38ish comments, I don`t think this was over the top OR out of place. There has to be at least 6+ comments in this thread about how no one should have ever been offended. Making a mountain out of a molehill? And no, using the "oooh we all grew up differently" was not my excuse for them being offended. I was using it as a reference to prove my point. BTW, how is it fair that you all should be free to share your opinion on people being offended by this subject, but for those 2 posters to be pointed out for having genuine feelings and opinions as well? Why is one fine, and the other not? Makes no sense. ETA: Regardless of what else has gone on, I got the answers I needed (along with some extra drama) so thank you everyone who contributed with their ideas and suggestions. THAT is what this board should  be about - not who said what, who offended who, whose opinion is more important. Can we end it?
    Posted by rasp.berry[/QUOTE]

    I think we are all just gettting really sick of posters being offended by very minimal things lately. Wedding stress? Maybe...
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards