My FI is British and lives in Engalnd with his family. I'm over for a visit and am staying with him and my FMIL - this is the first time we've ever been able to actually talk wedding. My FSIL has a friend getting married in a few months, and one night over dinner she was telling us how the bride is only putting 3 bottles of wine at each table of six(1 red, 1 white, and 1 rose) and they were completely dismayed!
At this point I started to get this feeling of dread, because I'm not having alcohol at my wedding (except for the champagne toast). The reason for this: my mother is a recovering alcoholic. Every special occasion of mine has been ruined because she got drunk. She's become a lot better lately, only drinking on special occasions - and my way of thinking is that if there isn't any alcohol for her to get drunk with, then she won't upset me on my wedding day.
I'm starting to have second thoughts, though, because of how devestated everyone seemed to be about LIMITED alcohol - am I going to make my reception less enjoyable for them by excluding it? And if so, here is my dilema - without alcohol his family is unhappy. With alcohol I run the risk of my mother getting trashed and ruining a part of my special day. I feel akward talking to FMIL about it because I hate to give a bad impression of my mother. I REALLY don't want to talk to my mother about it because she'll start to cry and ask me why I'm so ashamed of her and start calling herself a bad mother (so basically - she'll seriously overreact).
Any suggestions?
Re: Blame it on the a a a a a alcohol!!
Rambley Blog
I am not having any at my wedding this October, and I am sure that some people will be disappointed, but it is a personal decision.
Your FI's family should respect your decision. You could bring it up with them by just saying that there will be several recovering alcoholics in attendance and you would just rather not have the temptation there. You don't have to tell them any specifics or even bring up your mom. They should understand. And if alcohol is that important to them, they can drink after the reception
Good luck!!
An BTW-- do you work at FADO? I was there the other day for happy hour and my server's FI lives in England and she was getting married too... I know its a long shot... but its it you?
[QUOTE]I don't think there is anything for you to worry about. You have a delicate family situation and if you don't wish for any recovering alcoholics to be tempted then you merely remove the temptation. If the groom's family is disappointed then they will have to deal with that. Good luck!
Posted by ldbarrett82[/QUOTE]
DITTO THIS!!
Either way I hope that you have a beautiful and happy day!
[QUOTE]I think you should tell your FI the situation. Then he can talk to his family about why there won't be alcohol at your wedding. I bet they will understand and stop talking about it around you! An BTW-- do you work at FADO? I was there the other day for happy hour and my server's FI lives in England and she was getting married too... I know its a long shot... but its it you?
Posted by annetastic071710[/QUOTE]
No, it's not me lol. I used to work for Staples and now I'm between jobs, going to start looking again as soon as I get back to the states.
My FI does understand the situation, he just said to leave it up to me because he doesn't know what to say.
Thanks everyone for your helpful suggestions and support.
What are your oppinions on just serving Mimosas as a signature cocktail or something? I love mimosas and it ties in nicely with my Southern Belle theme. Would it be a bad idea to say only mimosas and no straight up champagne??
Rambley Blog
I love the idea, but you can get plenty drunk off mimosas!
Rambley Blog