FFF

melmac86 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_fff-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:2d679815-dbeb-4b88-a135-ed30ca9ef398Post:4f363629-9364-42ad-b24a-16b3395de6f4">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FFF : I'm all for making a difference and identifying where you can do good with what you have, but I also strongly believe that you should learn to appreciate your place in the world by learning about what's going on elsewhere, and that means paying attention to what's happening in other countries. I think people do themselves a great disservice by not taking the time to learn new things on the daily. Another thing: how can you find where you can make a difference if you don't open yourself to learning what's happening around you? How did you find out about Lesotho? What do you know about Lesotho? A lot of people have never even heard about Lesotho, as it's a very small country that's even completely surrounded by a much larger and much more well-known country (South Africa). There has to have been some way that Lesotho came into your life, and surely if you sponsor a child there, you keep your fingers on the pulse of that country. If you do, have you learned about the countries surrounding it? There's a lot going on in Africa right now, a lot of very interesting things. Maybe I just don't get it. I love knowing what's happening around the world. The world's a pretty baller place.
Posted by ahstillwell[/QUOTE]

I became aware of Lesotho through WorldVision at church and decided to sponsor a child and his family there. I have not learned about the countries surrounding it, just learned more about Lesotho and what it's like to live there/how my money is being put to use to change things.

melmac86 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_fff-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:2d679815-dbeb-4b88-a135-ed30ca9ef398Post:6076efb9-6cbb-4b8b-b745-83a41ae036a4">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FFF : It's not that it's a current event, but rather that the event continues to have ramifications today. You can't appreciate the future without knowing and understanding the past.
Posted by ahstillwell[/QUOTE]

I agree with this, but as I mentioned, Chernobyl is something I've never heard of. You can't appreciate something you don't know about. Plus, with nearly 200 countries (I believe that # is correct) in the world, people are going to have differences in what they are interested in keeping current with.

thejucheidea · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_fff-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:2d679815-dbeb-4b88-a135-ed30ca9ef398Post:803ec414-164b-4f38-b2bd-03a2f7546261">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FFF : I became aware of Lesotho through WorldVision at church and decided to sponsor a child and his family there. I have not learned about the countries surrounding it, just learned more about Lesotho and what it's like to live there/how my money is being put to use to change things.
Posted by melmac86[/QUOTE]

I feel like your world is a photograph where only one object is in focus, but everything else is a blur. Why not bring everything into focus by looking at the rest of the picture?

Also, I have a general flame: I hate it when people act all high and awesome because they donate money to a cause, like all you have to do is throw money at something to make everything work out. Money donations are great, but money won't do any good if there aren't people to do work. As Ethel Percy Andrus said, 'The human contribution is the essential ingredient. It is only in the giving of oneself to others that we truly live.'

melmac86 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_fff-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:2d679815-dbeb-4b88-a135-ed30ca9ef398Post:8508a62c-1e49-4919-874c-e0c48bda5b0e">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]I hosted a child from Belarus for two summers (a good chuck of the radiation released from Chernobyl drifted to Belarus) and being in a lower radioactive country for 2 months extends their life by 3-5 years. Does it make me sad to see her pictures of home? Absolutely. But it makes me even more resolved to do some good in her life. We send them money and food every year and I'm better for knowing the tragedy in the world because I know how good I have it. Also, I flame myself for not being around this week. I've wrapped up finals so maybe I'll have more time!
Posted by hellotarra[/QUOTE]

This is what I mean, though. I choose to stay current with areas where I feel I can make a difference. I don't need to have my eyes glued to CNN and other news stations to be reminded how good life is in the US compared to other countries.

lennonkdc · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_fff-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:2d679815-dbeb-4b88-a135-ed30ca9ef398Post:803ec414-164b-4f38-b2bd-03a2f7546261">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FFF : I became aware of Lesotho through WorldVision at church and decided to sponsor a child and his family there. I have not learned about the countries surrounding it, just learned more about Lesotho and what it's like to live there/how my money is being put to use to change things.
Posted by melmac86[/QUOTE]

<div>Great, you give some money that gets pooled with other people's money and a village in a county that, I'm betting, you can't even point to on map gets a goat and a well. That is so f-ing helpful. Oh, and you 'donate' to homeless/animal shelters. </div><div>
</div><div>Can you name the leading causes of homeless? Do you know what stance the people you vote for have on the building of more shelters? Or if they support permanent housing solutions? Did they vote to fund the nonprofits that support the causes you claim to champion?</div><div>
</div><div>But you 'donate' so, yeah you are totally helping.</div>

melmac86 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_fff-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:2d679815-dbeb-4b88-a135-ed30ca9ef398Post:c598d041-7a6c-44a7-a397-236a55923758">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FFF : I feel like your world is a photograph where only one object is in focus, but everything else is a blur. Why not bring everything into focus by looking at the rest of the picture? Also, I have a general flame: I hate it when people act all high and awesome because they donate money to a cause, like all you have to do is throw money at something to make everything work out. Money donations are great, but money won't do any good if there aren't people to do work. As Ethel Percy Andrus said, 'The human contribution is the essential ingredient. It is only in the giving of oneself to others that we truly live.'
Posted by ahstillwell[/QUOTE]

I'm by no means acting "high and awesome" as you put it, but if I'm not physically able to put myself in Lesotho, then donating money to a family in need, which in turn is used to better their entire community through work of people who CAN be there - it's the least I can do.

melmac86 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_fff-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:2d679815-dbeb-4b88-a135-ed30ca9ef398Post:18edea8d-8f70-4a91-9f9f-19cece2c98ce">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FFF : Great, you give some money that gets pooled with other people's money and a village in a county that, I'm betting, you can't even point to on map. That is so f-ing helpful. Oh, and you 'donate' to homeless/animal shelters. Can you name the leading causes of homeless? Do you know what stance the people you vote for have on the building of more shelters? Or if they support permanent housing solutions? Did they vote to fund the nonprofits that support the causes you claim to champion? But you 'donate' so, yeah you are totally helping.
Posted by lennonkdc[/QUOTE]

WOW. Take a step back. Why are you so hostile? Don't make false accusations, because I can in fact point out Lesotho. Let's see - addiction and mental illness are a leading cause of homelessness. How are you going to sit there and undermine me for doing something that I feel is at least making a difference? I made a commitment to sponsor this child monthly for the next 14 years. Maybe my monthly donation isn't going to change the world, but it's doing more than sitting on my couch watching CNN.

Peaseblossom55 · May 2012

Ok I flame my co-worker for being on the phone with a friend for at least 25 minutes now gossiping, while I've still got a lot of work to do and I am answering phones.

K Everdeen12 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_fff-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:2d679815-dbeb-4b88-a135-ed30ca9ef398Post:803ec414-164b-4f38-b2bd-03a2f7546261">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FFF : I became aware of Lesotho through WorldVision at church and decided to sponsor a child and his family there. I have not learned about the countries surrounding it, just learned more about Lesotho and what it's like to live there/how my money is being put to use to change things.
Posted by melmac86[/QUOTE]

<div>Obviously this is my AE account but I just needed to break out of character to say that this statement makes you seem more, not less, ignorant. </div>

IrishDreamer · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_fff-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:2d679815-dbeb-4b88-a135-ed30ca9ef398Post:f68adeb2-edb9-4419-ac81-51b2656cec20">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]I flame Fake Irish. Get your own damn picture. GOSH!
Posted by beanbot2002[/QUOTE]

I Fvcking love you, bitch. <3

melmac86 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_fff-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:2d679815-dbeb-4b88-a135-ed30ca9ef398Post:a84ec895-f561-4a94-81d0-e73e091df710">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FFF : I don't know why you replied to me, seeing as I didn't address you. The reason I did it is BECAUSE I watch CNN and other news outlets. Heck, even Colbert Report has a pretty good grasp of stories without being completely doom and gloom.
Posted by hellotarra[/QUOTE]

Ok, well I guess I misunderstood - I thought you were, since you had talked about sponsoring someone as well.

melmac86 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_fff-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:2d679815-dbeb-4b88-a135-ed30ca9ef398Post:787fcdb9-1d90-4985-bb08-883c73cca2b1">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FFF : Obviously this is my AE account but I just needed to break out of character to say that this statement makes you seem more, not less, ignorant.
Posted by K Everdeen12[/QUOTE]

How does not knowing about something, but taking the time to learn about it possibly make me more ignorant?

K Everdeen12 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_fff-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:2d679815-dbeb-4b88-a135-ed30ca9ef398Post:032fbfb5-7e04-4f72-869e-6cd1c2185faa">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FFF : How does not knowing about something, but taking the time to learn about it possibly make me more ignorant?
Posted by melmac86[/QUOTE]

<div>You only know about it because your church told you to care about it. </div><div>
</div><div>But you won't watch the news to find out what's going on in the world or apparently pay attention in history class because it makes you "sad." I just can't even follow that logic.</div>

peekaboo2011 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_fff-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:2d679815-dbeb-4b88-a135-ed30ca9ef398Post:1eb71c94-d6b0-4a1e-92a2-39790731cf64">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FFF : <strong>You only know about it because your church told you to care about it.</strong> But you won't watch the news to find out what's going on in the world or apparently pay attention in history class because it makes you "sad." I just can't even follow that logic.
Posted by K Everdeen12[/QUOTE]

THIS.

I'm sorry, but the "because God told me to" argument really gets under my skin.

IrishDreamer · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_fff-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:2d679815-dbeb-4b88-a135-ed30ca9ef398Post:b33ccfba-bb48-4a85-95ea-a4823bbccf0e">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FFF : I don't "sponsor" her. We hosted her here for two summers and now as part of our family we support them without any religious groups. If we went through a religious group it wouldn't be allowed in her area. She looks just like us so people think she's my cousin any how.
Posted by hellotarra[/QUOTE]

For the record, I think that's awesome.

melmac86 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_fff-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:2d679815-dbeb-4b88-a135-ed30ca9ef398Post:1eb71c94-d6b0-4a1e-92a2-39790731cf64">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FFF : You only know about it because your church told you to care about it. But you won't watch the news to find out what's going on in the world or apparently pay attention in history class because it makes you "sad." I just can't even follow that logic.
Posted by K Everdeen12[/QUOTE]

Nobody told me to care about it. WorldVision isn't exclusive to Lesotho. It's designed to help people in numerous countries; the child I decided to sponsor happened to be from Lesotho (a place I hadn't heard of before, but took time to learn about).

I'm honestly shocked at how fast this became a personal attack. I never said I WON'T watch the news, just that I don't care to watch a lot of coverage on horrible events, because yes, I have human emotions and seeing others hurting makes me sad.

I realize I haven't been on this board that long, but I don't get why having differing opinions with people has to become hurtful and out of line. To call me ignorant, claim I didn't pay attention in class, and put me down for sponsoring a child in poverty is really hurtful, even coming from a bunch of strangers.

beanbot2002 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_fff-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:2d679815-dbeb-4b88-a135-ed30ca9ef398Post:2d5b7cd4-9cb3-4a9f-83ef-e3aabe70e59d">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FFF : I Fvcking love you, bitch. <3
Posted by IrishDreamer[/QUOTE]

Not as much as I love you, Real Irish.

IrishDreamer · May 2012

Bean, MMMmm... probably about equal

Tara, siriously?? That's even more awesome! I suck at foreign languages... I did sign language for a while, but have gotten out of practice.

peekaboo2011 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_fff-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:2d679815-dbeb-4b88-a135-ed30ca9ef398Post:d6e69e11-12d5-47a6-be99-0c9f786d772f">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FFF : Nobody told me to care about it. WorldVision isn't exclusive to Lesotho. It's designed to help people in numerous countries; the child I decided to sponsor happened to be from Lesotho (a place I hadn't heard of before, but took time to learn about). I'm honestly shocked at how fast this became a personal attack. I never said I WON'T watch the news, just that I don't care to watch a lot of coverage on horrible events, because yes, I have human emotions and seeing others hurting makes me sad. I realize I haven't been on this board that long, but I don't get why having differing opinions with people has to become hurtful and out of line. To call me ignorant, claim I didn't pay attention in class, and put me down for sponsoring a child in poverty is really hurtful, even coming from a bunch of strangers.
Posted by melmac86[/QUOTE]

Put on your big girl panties and deal. This is what FFF is. FFF = Flame-Free-Friday.

thejucheidea · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_fff-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:2d679815-dbeb-4b88-a135-ed30ca9ef398Post:c499c1ff-ec82-4203-a8c3-079db8205461">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FFF : THIS. I'm sorry, but the "because God told me to" argument really gets under my skin.
Posted by peekaboo2011[/QUOTE]

This forever. <em>Forever</em>.

melmac86 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_fff-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:2d679815-dbeb-4b88-a135-ed30ca9ef398Post:3f549040-7021-4b81-b65b-d5ad2142dfc9">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FFF : This forever. Forever .
Posted by ahstillwell[/QUOTE]

NEVER said GOD TOLD ME TO. It was an organization mentioned with the goal of trying to inform people about how to help. I had actually been looking for something similar for awhile, but didn't know which organizations were legit and wouldn't just take your money for nothing. I did my research and decided on my own to sponsor.

Elle1036 · May 2012

I flame this lady:

http://www.momlogic.com/2009/05/breastfeeding_is_not_for_me.php

I've been wanting to discuss this for a long time, but it never felt like the right time to bring it up, so I'll sneak it in here.

There was this thread on MB once where one of the posters was all up in arms about other women judging her for saying she would never breastfeed her baby. Before I judged her myself, I did some googling to see if there were any good reasons (other than the obvious -- inability, disease, etc) not to breastfeed and that blog was what I found. It makes me so angry I can't see.

[Deleted User] · May 2012

firstly, peek and yaga, she didn't claim that "God told her to" or "her church told her to care about it". she just said that she was introduced to it at her church. she made the next step to become involved. that happens a lot. many churches introduce their members to a lot of organizations that DO GOOD, and if the members are interested they can pursue it. no one tells them to. a lot of the time, we don't have a ton of extra cash, so we can't give to every cause out there. but sometimes a certain organization or family will really get to you, and then a committment is made. not because someone told her to.

this is one of the reasons so many people are hesitant to even say they're religious on these boards.

secondly, talking about FFF and other posters in a private chat and coming up with ways to humiliate them and make up comebacks for them is just wrong. it goes on all the time, and it's WRONG. saying you want to c**tpunch someone for having an opinion you don't agree with? talking about other posters you don't like and coming up with ways to antagonize them on the boards? seriously? it's just a bunch of gossip and validation going on between certain posters.

there is a reason that some posters don't come around and don't post much anymore. and I know I'm going to get flamed to high heaven for saying all this, but someone has to. this isn't right. this isn't the same community that I joined in 2009. I don't know what's going on, but it makes me sick to see all the negative and hateful chat going on behind the scenes, and to see posters ganging up and attacking other posters they don't like because they have a picture similar to another poster... or because they think they're stupid, or ignorant, or for whatever reason. it doesn't make you a bigger person.

I can't control what you post, I know. it's THE INTERNET. but you can't control what I post either. and I can't just sit back and watch anymore. I feel as guilty as the rest of you for seeing what's going on and not doing a thing about it. I know posting this probably won't change a thing. it'll probably just get me pulled in to all the crap talk behind the scenes. but at least I'll feel better about myself for doing the right thing. I just don't understand the pull for drama... why does it make someone feel good to gossip and talk bad behind others' backs, for ganging up on them, for antagonizing them? someone please answer me that.

Peaseblossom55 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_fff-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:2d679815-dbeb-4b88-a135-ed30ca9ef398Post:787fcdb9-1d90-4985-bb08-883c73cca2b1">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FFF : Obviously this is my AE account but I just needed to break out of character to say that this statement makes you seem more, not less, ignorant.
Posted by K Everdeen12[/QUOTE]
Yay...

doubleSS07 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_fff-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:2d679815-dbeb-4b88-a135-ed30ca9ef398Post:7e17cbab-b587-4a6e-bfec-73cd42c48455">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]My asshole is hairier than sasquatch. And I love my hairy asshole.
Posted by beanbot2002[/QUOTE]

Shiit is sasquatch real too?

bethsmiles · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_fff-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:2d679815-dbeb-4b88-a135-ed30ca9ef398Post:e22fda51-939a-460b-b52c-3d03bf5b6bc1">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]firstly, peek and yaga, she didn't claim that "God told her to" or "her church told her to care about it". she just said that she was introduced to it at her church. she made the next step to become involved. that happens a lot. many churches introduce their members to a lot of organizations that DO GOOD, and if the members are interested they can pursue it. no one tells them to. a lot of the time, we don't have a ton of extra cash, so we can't give to every cause out there. but sometimes a certain organization or family will really get to you, and then a committment is made. not because someone told her to. this is one of the reasons so many people are hesitant to even say they're religious on these boards. secondly, talking about FFF and other posters in a private chat and coming up with ways to humiliate them and make up comebacks for them is just wrong. it goes on all the time, and it's WRONG. saying you want to c**tpunch someone for having an opinion you don't agree with? talking about other posters you don't like and coming up with ways to antagonize them on the boards? seriously? it's just a bunch of gossip and validation going on between certain posters. there is a reason that some posters don't come around and don't post much anymore. and I know I'm going to get flamed to high heaven for saying all this, but someone has to. this isn't right. this isn't the same community that I joined in 2009. I don't know what's going on, but it makes me sick to see all the negative and hateful chat going on behind the scenes, and to see posters ganging up and attacking other posters they don't like because they have a picture similar to another poster... or because they think they're stupid, or ignorant, or for whatever reason. it doesn't make you a bigger person. I can't control what you post, I know. it's THE INTERNET. but you can't control what I post either. and I can't just sit back and watch anymore. I feel as guilty as the rest of you for seeing what's going on and not doing a thing about it. I know posting this probably won't change a thing. it'll probably just get me pulled in to all the crap talk behind the scenes. but at least I'll feel better about myself for doing the right thing. I just don't understand the pull for drama... why does it make someone feel good to gossip and talk bad behind others' backs, for ganging up on them, for antagonizing them? someone please answer me that.
Posted by CocoBellaF[/QUOTE]

I agree with this 100% and I'm so glad you said it because I couldn't have said it better myself.

melmac86 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_fff-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:2d679815-dbeb-4b88-a135-ed30ca9ef398Post:e22fda51-939a-460b-b52c-3d03bf5b6bc1">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]firstly, peek and yaga, she didn't claim that "God told her to" or "her church told her to care about it". she just said that she was introduced to it at her church. she made the next step to become involved. that happens a lot. many churches introduce their members to a lot of organizations that DO GOOD, and if the members are interested they can pursue it. no one tells them to. a lot of the time, we don't have a ton of extra cash, so we can't give to every cause out there. but sometimes a certain organization or family will really get to you, and then a committment is made. not because someone told her to. this is one of the reasons so many people are hesitant to even say they're religious on these boards. secondly, talking about FFF and other posters in a private chat and coming up with ways to humiliate them and make up comebacks for them is just wrong. it goes on all the time, and it's WRONG. saying you want to c**tpunch someone for having an opinion you don't agree with? talking about other posters you don't like and coming up with ways to antagonize them on the boards? seriously? it's just a bunch of gossip and validation going on between certain posters. there is a reason that some posters don't come around and don't post much anymore. and I know I'm going to get flamed to high heaven for saying all this, but someone has to. this isn't right. this isn't the same community that I joined in 2009. I don't know what's going on, but it makes me sick to see all the negative and hateful chat going on behind the scenes, and to see posters ganging up and attacking other posters they don't like because they have a picture similar to another poster... or because they think they're stupid, or ignorant, or for whatever reason. it doesn't make you a bigger person. I can't control what you post, I know. it's THE INTERNET. but you can't control what I post either. and I can't just sit back and watch anymore. I feel as guilty as the rest of you for seeing what's going on and not doing a thing about it. I know posting this probably won't change a thing. it'll probably just get me pulled in to all the crap talk behind the scenes. but at least I'll feel better about myself for doing the right thing. I just don't understand the pull for drama... why does it make someone feel good to gossip and talk bad behind others' backs, for ganging up on them, for antagonizing them? someone please answer me that.
Posted by CocoBellaF[/QUOTE]

I'm missing something also - it went from me admitting I didn't know about Chernobyl, to me saying I hate the news for how depressing it is to me being ignorant, not paying attention in class, and yes getting put down by Lennon (especially) for doing something that I feel makes a difference. It's the internet so people will post what they want, but getting "attacked" for something like this seems really unjustified and I'm not going to put on my big girl panties and "just deal".

Elle1036 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_fff-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:2d679815-dbeb-4b88-a135-ed30ca9ef398Post:9b038575-a0bf-42d4-93a4-434910d3befc">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: FFF : Because you disagree with her point of view on this?
Posted by polo1425[/QUOTE]

Yep. I don't think any of the reasons she described are good enough.

thejucheidea · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_fff-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:2d679815-dbeb-4b88-a135-ed30ca9ef398Post:e22fda51-939a-460b-b52c-3d03bf5b6bc1">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]this is one of the reasons so many people are hesitant to even say they're religious on these boards.
Posted by CocoBellaF[/QUOTE]

If people aren't willing to engage in dialogue, either positive or negative, about their religion, then they should stick to the polite Southern maxim of 'don't discuss religion and politics in public'. You can't go into public forums expecting people to support your religious decisions. While people can be respectful and choose not to say anything, some people are strongly anti-religion or adhere to different religions and may have something to say.

elannis · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_fff-1?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:2d679815-dbeb-4b88-a135-ed30ca9ef398Post:e22fda51-939a-460b-b52c-3d03bf5b6bc1">Re: FFF</a>:
[QUOTE]firstly, peek and yaga, she didn't claim that "God told her to" or "her church told her to care about it". she just said that she was introduced to it at her church. she made the next step to become involved. that happens a lot. many churches introduce their members to a lot of organizations that DO GOOD, and if the members are interested they can pursue it. no one tells them to. a lot of the time, we don't have a ton of extra cash, so we can't give to every cause out there. but sometimes a certain organization or family will really get to you, and then a committment is made. not because someone told her to. this is one of the reasons so many people are hesitant to even say they're religious on these boards. secondly, talking about FFF and other posters in a private chat and coming up with ways to humiliate them and make up comebacks for them is just wrong. it goes on all the time, and it's WRONG. saying you want to c**tpunch someone for having an opinion you don't agree with? talking about other posters you don't like and coming up with ways to antagonize them on the boards? seriously? it's just a bunch of gossip and validation going on between certain posters. there is a reason that some posters don't come around and don't post much anymore. and I know I'm going to get flamed to high heaven for saying all this, but someone has to. this isn't right. this isn't the same community that I joined in 2009. I don't know what's going on, but it makes me sick to see all the negative and hateful chat going on behind the scenes, and to see posters ganging up and attacking other posters they don't like because they have a picture similar to another poster... or because they think they're stupid, or ignorant, or for whatever reason. it doesn't make you a bigger person. I can't control what you post, I know. it's THE INTERNET. but you can't control what I post either. and I can't just sit back and watch anymore. I feel as guilty as the rest of you for seeing what's going on and not doing a thing about it. I know posting this probably won't change a thing. it'll probably just get me pulled in to all the crap talk behind the scenes. but at least I'll feel better about myself for doing the right thing. I just don't understand the pull for drama... why does it make someone feel good to gossip and talk bad behind others' backs, for ganging up on them, for antagonizing them? someone please answer me that.
Posted by CocoBellaF[/QUOTE]

I'm going to agree with Beth and Coco on this one. I don't get on the chat often, but a big reason why I'm not around as often is because of all of the drama that has been going on lately. It has just been easier to walk away than say something.

FFF

Re: FFF

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