Not Engaged Yet

How many of you have....

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Re: How many of you have....

  • PandaBurrPandaBurr member
    1000 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_many-of?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:c16be189-6014-4fb7-a781-389504b1781fPost:a64e2983-2bee-41fd-8249-2ea8ad7ff382">Re: How many of you have....</a>:
    [QUOTE]I've was getting hit with so many different responses and on top of everything at work and I just felt overwhelmed. So thank you for the understanding. To clear one thing up too, I have not mailed out invites. Even I know thats silly! I simply just bought them and they are sitting in my closet. <strong><em>I have never been engaged before</em></strong> so I have no idea what the time line is for a dress.
    Posted by chendrix77[/QUOTE]

    Roffle.
  • edited December 2011
    I'm getting married in about a year.  I haven't tried on dresses yet and I'm not planning to until either fall or winter of this year.  The whole 1 year to get a dress is a myth unless you are going to a high end store like Kleinfeld and they have to make your dress from scratch.  It's my understanding that the dresses come in much quicker at stores like David's Bridal, Alfred Angelo, and many other places.  

    I agree with Acro that you will definitely be able to find that dress or one very similar later down the line.  And I agree with whoever said that you really have to see if that style suits you (sorry I forgot who wrote it Frown).  Plenty of people find themselves in dresses they never thought they would like.  

    Ironically, the first thing I got for my wedding was a DIY invite kit.  It was deeply discounted and a friend and I stumbled upon the kit, we weren't looking for invites.  I don't care very much for invites and just wanted something that was functional.  I didn't buy them until I was engaged.  Call me BSC if you want.  Smile
  • katanne9katanne9 member
    2500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_many-of?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:c16be189-6014-4fb7-a781-389504b1781fPost:a64e2983-2bee-41fd-8249-2ea8ad7ff382">Re: How many of you have....</a>:
    [QUOTE]I've was getting hit with so many different responses and on top of everything at work and I just felt overwhelmed. So thank you for the understanding. To clear one thing up too, I have not mailed out invites. Even I know thats silly! I simply just bought them and they are sitting in my closet.<strong> I have never been engaged before </strong>so I have no idea what the time line is for a dress.
    Posted by chendrix77[/QUOTE]

    Erm... most of us haven't been engaged before.

    IMO you need to halt planning. You have a date and a venue. Now STOP and let him propose when he is ready. Many of us on this board are planning weddings in 4-8 months - you are a year and a half out. STOP STOP STOP and do it when you can do it together.

    I'm not trying to be rude, but I really think you are doing everything way too early. The Knot has a timeline checklist if you are worried about when to do what. But we will all tell you that 6 months is plenty of time to plan a wedding - you have nearly 3 times that. You are totally jumping the gun.
  • bajedivabajediva member
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_many-of?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:c16be189-6014-4fb7-a781-389504b1781fPost:dacb5fe5-9207-4752-a423-c1d37d165103">Re: How many of you have....</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: How many of you have.... : I try really hard not to be mean to anyone here...but...hahaha..that was giggle-worthy. Thank you. 
    Posted by Kroliczku[/QUOTE]
    Haha...glad to be of service. But don't that me, thank OP for the inspiration.
    @desert: DYING at your TTC comment!!

    Seriously though OP, we're the same age so I feel I should acknowledge your potential for reasonability, and your response to our responses does demonstrate it a little. So I'll give you the benefit of the doubt. I agree with those who said you should just STOP. NOW. Date picked and venue booked. Ok. Now just be. Love your BF, and let him love you. Let him propose when he's ready. Take it one day at a time, no faster.

    My BF and I have been discussing marriage, date range, narrowed down rings, visited the likely venue (we were there on vacation), I've looked at dresses. I was initially so excited by the prospect, but I haven't done anything remotely wedding related now in months because I would hate to lose the relationship I have with him *now* being so wrapped up in what's going to happen *then*. There's plenty of time hon.
  • desertsundesertsun member
    5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    Let me just clarify some the reasons why we think you're too early with the planning.

    First and foremost, TRUST ME, you will get tired of wedding planning. If you had a school project that you worked on for a year, you'd get tired of it right? Well, as excited as you are to get married, the wedding will start to feel like one huge, drawn out school project.

    Secondly, you are going to change your mind on things. The less time you spend planning, the less you will change, the more enthusiasm you will retain. Make sense?

    There is always going to be someone out there who does something you love, and then you try to find a way to incorporate it, and things just get so complicated.

    So yes, gather ideas if you like. That's one thing. Actually gathering materials for projects and buying things is too much right now. Bookmark ideas if you like. Keep a file folder. Just don't start deciding things just yet.

    HTH.
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  • edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_many-of?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:c16be189-6014-4fb7-a781-389504b1781fPost:e879b517-9cc4-4563-aab1-67a0d267def2">Re: How many of you have....</a>:
    [QUOTE]Let me just clarify some the reasons why we think you're too early with the planning. First and foremost, TRUST ME, you will get tired of wedding planning. If you had a school project that you worked on for a year, you'd get tired of it right? Posted by desertsun[/QUOTE]

    Admitedly I skipped most of this thread but I want to echo this thought 100%.  We've been engaged for 18 months and I got so sick of wedding stuff abotu about six, took a long break and now I'm struggling to get everything done at the last minute.  Just chill.
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  • chendrix77chendrix77 member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Thanks guys. :) I am just the type of person that just likes to plan everything as soon as possible. I don't know why but that it just me :) I know I have plenty of time to plan, I think I am just getting to caught up in the planning too because one girl I work with just got married and another is planning hers.
  • bethsmilesbethsmiles Denver, CO member
    10000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    edited December 2011
    I think you will have a lot more fun planning if you just wait until you are engaged. I love planning too but that doesn't mean I'm going to start planning my wedding right now. Save the wedding planning for when you get engaged otherwise you rob yourself of the experience.


  • edited December 2011
    Waaaaaaaaaaaaait...sending out your invites 1.5 years in advance (when you're technically not engaged yet) is crazy, but purchasing them isn't?

    STOP PLANNING YOUR WEDDING. PLAN YOUR WEDDING WHEN YOU ARE ACTUALLY ENGAGED.

    ::headdesk::

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  • hetshuphetshup member
    2500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    To answer your question, no I didn't. I did however, buy a dress 8 months before our wedding, that was 5 months ago. Two months ago I had a total freakout that I didn't have the right dress and it wasn't what I wanted. I am not a very wishy washy person in general, so that was odd for me. The point is, give yourself some time. 
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